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DIMENNO, THREAD OF CONFINEMENT

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FrankD	Feb 5 2011, 06:05 PM Post #2301
Noise Board Sponsor Group: Moderators Posts: 44,482 Joined: July 3 03 From: MP3 Forum Moderator Member No.: 302	QUOTE(dimenno @ Feb 4 2011, 03:36 PM) Andy Kubert, from the looks of Kid Flash. Hawk looks kind of both deflated and pneumatic. what was your first guess? think 1960's

dimenno	Feb 7 2011, 07:00 PM Post #2302
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	QUOTE(FrankD @ Feb 5 2011, 06:05 PM) what was your first guess? think 1960's Joe Kubert! Of course! Ca. 1968, I'll betcha!

FrankD	Feb 8 2011, 09:28 AM Post #2303
Noise Board Sponsor Group: Moderators Posts: 44,482 Joined: July 3 03 From: MP3 Forum Moderator Member No.: 302	Don't be a retardy, that's NICK CARDY!

dimenno	Feb 9 2011, 05:41 PM Post #2304
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	Well, it least it's not a Murphy Anderson Superman head on a Jack Kirby Superman body.

FrankD	Feb 9 2011, 08:45 PM Post #2305
Noise Board Sponsor Group: Moderators Posts: 44,482 Joined: July 3 03 From: MP3 Forum Moderator Member No.: 302	QUOTE(dimenno @ Feb 9 2011, 05:41 PM) Well, it least it's not a Murphy Anderson Superman head on a Jack Kirby Superman body. cha!

dimenno	Feb 15 2011, 11:15 PM Post #2306
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	BAND NAMES Thee Quick-Acting Hypnotics Asking For Trouble Milk Of Amnesia Origin Unk Gonna Do It For Johnny Cowards Of 911 Acid Is Groovy Kill The Pigs They Eat Their Young Radioactive Snowmen Terraplane Soup Laugh It Up Furball To The Batcave Famous Movie Drunks Booger Buddies Thank You For Not Killing Us Shitfire Island The Filthy Monkeys Hiroshima Pwned Brain Feast The Murder Of Abraham Lincoln Old People In Hell Gorilla Crime Boss The Incomprehensibles The Scum Bozoes Sleep In The Grave Russia's Greatest Sex Machine S.E. Hinton's First Novel For Adults Not So Fast Faggot We Belong Dead Pushkin Shot In Duel His Bread In My Shoulder My Wife's Handwriting The Bear Wiped His Ass With The Rabbit I Can See Your House From Here Old Fashioned Hate Circuit Of A Dogma Jabbering Dynamo Sleepy Rigamarole Odd Enough To Be Your Father Teenage Centurions For The Coming Armageddon This Turbulent Priests The Hammer Comes Down Honey, I Smoked The Drugs The Washington Consensus Cosmic Ruthlessness. The Drizzlin' Shits A Queer In Boys Town Eagle On The Sunday Dollar The Clusterfucks Tricycle Bastard Stalin The Clown Xenophobic Lesbians Born-Again-Christian Circus Scientific Aborigines Muslim Photographers A Puritan Christmas The Beatnik Jet Pilots Vertigo Zombies Stompbox Wankers The Containment Boys Please Advise Tear Factory Mascot Parables Please Be Kind The Minor 6145 Choir Alpha Radiation The Clean Getaways Mrs. Babymother The Mosquito Apologists A Pagan Suckled In A Creed Outworn Industrial Solvents Eunuchss Of Empire The Rat Parade Big Cats Sonic Interval Manly Pansies Squirrel Brains Tweeter Blowjob Alibis Rackety Critters Humiliated Jockeyboys Sticky Trim Alcoholic Penitentiary Inmates Pharmacy Robbers Cruelty To Bears Derelict Rejects Corleone's Thunderbolt Shitfire And Brimstone Fuck Bias Amphitheater Bums Me Love You Long Time Crackhead Junkies Dance With The Go-Go Gophers Supernatural Hitler No Reasonable Offer Refused Curses Fried Again Smash Ugly Confederate Rap Inspector Pig Pricked Sphincter Monkeys Swinger Square Dancing Hen On A Hotplate Thee Psychonauts University Of Blonde Delinquents Whiskey Rebellion Hash And Lentils Club Godhead Pork Messengers Industry Godfathers Vagina Puppets Soggy Tramp Gumbo Drunk Protestants We Refuse Orange Twang Atlas Mugged Amoeba Chow Mossy Wax Sea Urchin Jerky Dylan Girls Vacation Amid The Rubble Papa Bunk Lifestyle Porn Project Madness The Fat Little Nothings The Plastic Bottlecaps Ghost Soup The Lemon Detectors The Red Hot Pistols Tranqs For The Memories Bennies From Heaven Ramadan-A-Dingdong An Ashanti In Old Ashanti Town The Bad Actors The Fat Biker Chicks The Car Toads Bungtown The Cake Eaters Doctor Medicine First Of May The Spit-Backs The Highbinders Ready John Oil Of Joy The Prairie Comedians The Drunkery The Turnscrews The Wet Quakers Wild Train The Bird That Goes Beep Beep Fight For Might And Right Too Young To Know The Danger Long Ears And Tail To Match The Akasic Record Company 70 Bone-Breaking Secrets Young Liberace Jealous Daddy Walk It Off, Jesus The Ice Cream Soldiers The Voice Of God 11 Benevolent Elephants Thee Mystifying Oracles Wood Beez A Fool's Journey The Daily Beatings Nixon's Revenge Sweated Labor Secret Justice Moneyland Mint Suckers Anger Points Recursive Loop Puritan Jealousy Six Months Away From The Bin Beatles UK Duce Come Back 72 Virgins Jesus Loves Porn Stars Bitter Apple The Most Disappointing My Funny Hitler Booger Ranchers Jumbo's Colostomy Bag The Jolly Munchers The Piss Poor Boys Daddy's Smelly Pipe Kibbles 'N' Bits The Power Of Eminent Domain The Way Back Machine The Coffee Virus The Goddess Years Robot Ham Lake Nowhere Incarnation Evaporated Milk God 2 Secret Soundtrack Nonstop Circus Of Angst House Of Meth The Season Of Anarchy Secret Mark Explosive Battle Of Giants Meat River Shitware The Fatal Romantics Filthy Midget Mart Pavlov's Coffee Wife In A Can Blind Man's Television 100,000 Words Or Less Tin Ear The Four Moptops Of The Apocalypse Oswald And The Patsies The Givenchy Code The Peanut Shit Wranglers Batman Could Beat Superman Voices Echoing In My Head Jughead King Of Queen Archie's World The Popcorn Trick Pas A Douche Not Your Grandfather's Fascism Puritan Jewelry Eight Minutes From The Sun Four Roses Logic Give Back Those Blankets Genocide In Slow Motion Who Said Dat Word Fuck? The Bullshit Detectors Dogs Bred To Be Eaten Like Chickens Slob Killers Brosephus Guy Who Throws A Glass Bottle In A Crowd And Sneaks Into The Corner Uglier Than Thou Animal Pals Atomic Opera Designated Punching Bags 32 Animal Pals The Throwstars The All You Can Eat Challenge Ahoy There Sailor Americans Live Forever The Angry Gourmets Bacon Is Death Bitter Drink Boy's Nation Dawg Treet Girl Reaction Izzard Jeckyll Park Kali Kill Crazy Dillinger Mental Radio Mickey Death Negative Brow Pirate Radio Silk Purse Tempermental Artistes Tin Soldiers Tired Eyes Two-Backed Beasts The Wet Parade Wonderland Zandor And His Herculoids Unacceptable American Conditions Teflon Junkies Electroshock Veterans Toxic Schlock Deadly Mentors Antheap Gods Peyote Place The Picknickers Thousand Mile Stare Hate Paper Dolls The Tyros Will Work For Gas Everything Is Love Silly Hitler And The Degenerate Art Ensemble The Hollywood Finocchios Reality Tunnel Global Obsession And The Self-Fulfilling Prophecies Googled My Ex Gunner And Sarge, With Pooch Relax, Love, Messiah Is Coming My God I'm Tough Scary Norms Let Love Be Obeyed Murderous Bouncers The Crazy Cat Ladies Shiloh The Beagle And His Boy Master 12 Foot Long Hot Dog Craziest Cereal You Ever Met Big Money Big Money Paul Is Dead at 64 Touche, Douche White Slaves In America Commander Robot Terror Masters Team B Kill All The Devils We Can Build High Pure Fiction Mature Living Choices Delicate Weeds U-977 The Darned Sure G.I. Dope High-Decibel Circus Bad Success Lady Boner Immediately Goes To Zero Family Uplift Pissing Match Burnt Paris Bummer Command Six Guns Blazing Day Without Sunshine Spineless Wonders 1969 OK Tarantula Beware Hot Girls With Manly Faces Coke Nail Police And The Crooked Landlords Spare A Dollar For An Old Altar Boy Canned Creamed Koran Tiger Hand Beats Rock Booger Bear Dog Bullies Favorite Prostitute Your Wife John Wayne Gacy And His Famous Rope Trick

FrankD	Feb 16 2011, 08:51 AM Post #2307
Noise Board Sponsor Group: Moderators Posts: 44,482 Joined: July 3 03 From: MP3 Forum Moderator Member No.: 302	QUOTE(dimenno @ Feb 15 2011, 11:15 PM) BAND NAMES Thee Quick-Acting Hypnotics Asking For Trouble Milk Of Amnesia Origin Unk Gonna Do It For Johnny Cowards Of 911 Acid Is Groovy Kill The Pigs They Eat Their Young Radioactive Snowmen Terraplane Soup Laugh It Up Furball To The Batcave Famous Movie Drunks Booger Buddies Thank You For Not Killing Us Shitfire Island The Filthy Monkeys Hiroshima Pwned Brain Feast The Murder Of Abraham Lincoln Old People In Hell Gorilla Crime Boss The Incomprehensibles The Scum Bozoes Sleep In The Grave Russia's Greatest Sex Machine S.E. Hinton's First Novel For Adults Not So Fast Faggot We Belong Dead Pushkin Shot In Duel His Bread In My Shoulder My Wife's Handwriting The Bear Wiped His Ass With The Rabbit I Can See Your House From Here Old Fashioned Hate Circuit Of A Dogma Jabbering Dynamo Sleepy Rigamarole Odd Enough To Be Your Father Teenage Centurions For The Coming Armageddon This Turbulent Priests The Hammer Comes Down Honey, I Smoked The Drugs The Washington Consensus Cosmic Ruthlessness. The Drizzlin' Shits A Queer In Boys Town Eagle On The Sunday Dollar The Clusterfucks Tricycle Bastard Stalin The Clown Xenophobic Lesbians Born-Again-Christian Circus Scientific Aborigines Muslim Photographers A Puritan Christmas The Beatnik Jet Pilots Vertigo Zombies Stompbox Wankers The Containment Boys Please Advise Tear Factory Mascot Parables Please Be Kind The Minor 6145 Choir Alpha Radiation The Clean Getaways Mrs. Babymother The Mosquito Apologists A Pagan Suckled In A Creed Outworn Industrial Solvents Eunuchss Of Empire The Rat Parade Big Cats Sonic Interval Manly Pansies Squirrel Brains Tweeter Blowjob Alibis Rackety Critters Humiliated Jockeyboys Sticky Trim Alcoholic Penitentiary Inmates Pharmacy Robbers Cruelty To Bears Derelict Rejects Corleone's Thunderbolt Shitfire And Brimstone Fuck Bias Amphitheater Bums Me Love You Long Time Crackhead Junkies Dance With The Go-Go Gophers Supernatural Hitler No Reasonable Offer Refused Curses Fried Again Smash Ugly Confederate Rap Inspector Pig Pricked Sphincter Monkeys Swinger Square Dancing Hen On A Hotplate Thee Psychonauts University Of Blonde Delinquents Whiskey Rebellion Hash And Lentils Club Godhead Pork Messengers Industry Godfathers Vagina Puppets Soggy Tramp Gumbo Drunk Protestants We Refuse Orange Twang Atlas Mugged Amoeba Chow Mossy Wax Sea Urchin Jerky Dylan Girls Vacation Amid The Rubble Papa Bunk Lifestyle Porn Project Madness The Fat Little Nothings The Plastic Bottlecaps Ghost Soup The Lemon Detectors The Red Hot Pistols Tranqs For The Memories Bennies From Heaven Ramadan-A-Dingdong An Ashanti In Old Ashanti Town The Bad Actors The Fat Biker Chicks The Car Toads Bungtown The Cake Eaters Doctor Medicine First Of May The Spit-Backs The Highbinders Ready John Oil Of Joy The Prairie Comedians The Drunkery The Turnscrews The Wet Quakers Wild Train The Bird That Goes Beep Beep Fight For Might And Right Too Young To Know The Danger Long Ears And Tail To Match The Akasic Record Company 70 Bone-Breaking Secrets Young Liberace Jealous Daddy Walk It Off, Jesus The Ice Cream Soldiers The Voice Of God 11 Benevolent Elephants Thee Mystifying Oracles Wood Beez A Fool's Journey The Daily Beatings Nixon's Revenge Sweated Labor Secret Justice Moneyland Mint Suckers Anger Points Recursive Loop Puritan Jealousy Six Months Away From The Bin Beatles UK Duce Come Back 72 Virgins Jesus Loves Porn Stars Bitter Apple The Most Disappointing My Funny Hitler Booger Ranchers Jumbo's Colostomy Bag The Jolly Munchers The Piss Poor Boys Daddy's Smelly Pipe Kibbles 'N' Bits The Power Of Eminent Domain The Way Back Machine The Coffee Virus The Goddess Years Robot Ham Lake Nowhere Incarnation Evaporated Milk God 2 Secret Soundtrack Nonstop Circus Of Angst House Of Meth The Season Of Anarchy Secret Mark Explosive Battle Of Giants Meat River Shitware The Fatal Romantics Filthy Midget Mart Pavlov's Coffee Wife In A Can Blind Man's Television 100,000 Words Or Less Tin Ear The Four Moptops Of The Apocalypse Oswald And The Patsies The Givenchy Code The Peanut Shit Wranglers Batman Could Beat Superman Voices Echoing In My Head Jughead King Of Queen Archie's World The Popcorn Trick Pas A Douche Not Your Grandfather's Fascism Puritan Jewelry Eight Minutes From The Sun Four Roses Logic Give Back Those Blankets Genocide In Slow Motion Who Said Dat Word Fuck? The Bullshit Detectors Dogs Bred To Be Eaten Like Chickens Slob Killers Brosephus Guy Who Throws A Glass Bottle In A Crowd And Sneaks Into The Corner Uglier Than Thou Animal Pals Atomic Opera Designated Punching Bags 32 Animal Pals The Throwstars The All You Can Eat Challenge Ahoy There Sailor Americans Live Forever The Angry Gourmets Bacon Is Death Bitter Drink Boy's Nation Dawg Treet Girl Reaction Izzard Jeckyll Park Kali Kill Crazy Dillinger Mental Radio Mickey Death Negative Brow Pirate Radio Silk Purse Tempermental Artistes Tin Soldiers Tired Eyes Two-Backed Beasts The Wet Parade Wonderland Zandor And His Herculoids Unacceptable American Conditions Teflon Junkies Electroshock Veterans Toxic Schlock Deadly Mentors Antheap Gods Peyote Place The Picknickers Thousand Mile Stare Hate Paper Dolls The Tyros Will Work For Gas Everything Is Love Silly Hitler And The Degenerate Art Ensemble The Hollywood Finocchios Reality Tunnel Global Obsession And The Self-Fulfilling Prophecies Googled My Ex Gunner And Sarge, With Pooch Relax, Love, Messiah Is Coming My God I'm Tough Scary Norms Let Love Be Obeyed Murderous Bouncers The Crazy Cat Ladies Shiloh The Beagle And His Boy Master 12 Foot Long Hot Dog Craziest Cereal You Ever Met Big Money Big Money Paul Is Dead at 64 Touche, Douche White Slaves In America Commander Robot Terror Masters Team B Kill All The Devils We Can Build High Pure Fiction Mature Living Choices Delicate Weeds U-977 The Darned Sure G.I. Dope High-Decibel Circus Bad Success Lady Boner Immediately Goes To Zero Family Uplift Pissing Match Burnt Paris Bummer Command Six Guns Blazing Day Without Sunshine Spineless Wonders 1969 OK Tarantula Beware Hot Girls With Manly Faces Coke Nail Police And The Crooked Landlords Spare A Dollar For An Old Altar Boy Canned Creamed Koran Tiger Hand Beats Rock Booger Bear Dog Bullies Favorite Prostitute Your Wife John Wayne Gacy And His Famous Rope Trick i'll call you when we do that CD of 30 second songs/sounds/noise

dimenno	Feb 17 2011, 09:13 PM Post #2308
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	Please do!

FrankD	Feb 18 2011, 01:15 PM Post #2309
Noise Board Sponsor Group: Moderators Posts: 44,482 Joined: July 3 03 From: MP3 Forum Moderator Member No.: 302	QUOTE(dimenno @ Feb 17 2011, 09:13 PM) Please do! great! it will be awful!!! but i'll love it!

dimenno	Feb 22 2011, 10:26 PM Post #2310
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	MODERN WISDOM TAGS 1-111 My Dad was a liberal, so just to piss him off I brought a white girl home. Sometimes I feel like a motherless child. But usually, I just order a cheeseburger. My dentist was also my psychiatrist. One day he told me that my cavities were all in my head. Life is just a bowl of cherries but remember that President Zachary Taylor died of indigestion after eating too many cherries. [MW61] These are representative samples of the philosophical humor on tap at Modern Wisdom. If you want golf jokes, celebrity references or scatology, look elsewhere. All aesthetics are determined by class distinctions, and that goes double for humor. If you can relate to an over educated lower class kinda guy who's doing his Master's thesis on EC comics, this site is for you. Satire, parody, humor, media, philosophy all written by a working comedian known for many years as The Wrong Hero. #1 1 THE WISDOM OF THE HERO or 2 TOO SMART FOR THE ROOM or 3 HATE PATROL 4 PLACE DISORDER HERE 5 THE EVIL OPPOSITE OF EVERYTHING 6 ALL LIES 7 NEW CLICHES 8 THE AGONY OF VICTORY, THE THRILL OF DEFEAT 9 FLUCKO 10 LOGIC BOMBS 11 ANTI 60S MAN 12 EARTH HOGS 13 BABY CRIES, MAMA BUYS 14 ANTI AMERICA 15 BEAUTIFUL STEREOTYPES 16 LOOK AT MY SCREAMING FACE 17 THE TRIUMPH OF MEAT 18 FALLEN APE 19 TYRANNY IN ITS PUREST MODERN FORM 20 AN AMERICAN TRAVESTY 21 A FOUNT OF USEFUL MISINFORMATION 22 DRUGS, GOD, ALCOHOL AND SITCOMS 23 THE FORMULAIC SHOW 24 NOSTALGIA MAN 25 SIR FATSO 26 DR. GOOD AND MR. BAD 27 MY DOG'S GHOST TALKS TO GOD 28 TREMBLING ON THE BRINK OF NERVOUS EXHAUSTION 29 ME NOT STUPID 30 GOD'S PICKUP LINES 31 WHAT WOULD JESUS DO RADIO STATION WWJD 32 A VERY COMMERCIAL FORM OF MENTAL ILLNESS 33 TRASHOMON 34 SOON TO BE A MINOR MOTION PICTURE 35 ADULT CHILD OF VEGETARIANS 36 WEAPONS OF MASS DISTRACTION 37 PROFESSOR RETARD: INTELLECTUAL DUMBBELL 38 THE RETARDED PROFESSOR 39 SENSIBLE TRAGEDY 40 THE BURDEN OF THE LEGACY 41 A MYTHIC ORIGINAL 42 A RATIONAL FEVER 43 THE DISPENSIBLE MAN 44 THIS IS NOT ART 45 I AM THE BIGGEST JOKE IN THE WORLD 46 CALL ME OFFENSIVEMAN 47 WITNESS THE TERRIBLE POWERLESSNESS OF WORDS 49 ANGRY CAMPER 50 DIRTY JOKES 51 GOOFY SINGS THE BEEGEES 52 THE FOUR AD FIGURES OF THE APOCALYPSE 53 THE FOUR FEMALE TALK SHOW HOSTS OF THE APOCALYPSE 54 HECK: THE LOGIC OF DARNATION 55 AN ENGINE OF DENUNCIATION 56 XENOPHOBES GO HOME 57 THIS NONSENSE CANNOT BE ALLOWED TO CONTINUE 58 ANTI ENTITY 59 LET THE DRUGS DO THEIR WORK 60 ALL ART IS SEXUAL HARASSMENT 61 CELEBRITIES ARE DESIGNER MYTHS 62 COMPOSITE MASTER OF INFINITE SPACE AND TIME 63 A CRASS ACT 64 THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF DRUGS 65 SUPER DEPRESSED MAN 66 50S MAN 67 NERVOUS TICS OF THE HACK COMIC 68 UNITED WE FALL 69 SECRET IDENTITY POLITICS 70 YO, STEP UP AND GET BEAT DOWN 71 CAPE DOES NOT ENABLE USER TO FLY 72 A FIEND IN NEED 73 CAN'T...RESIST...UNDERTOW; CAN'T...USE...SYNTAX 74 CONSPICUOUSLY NOT SPENDING MONEY 75 A TIME TO MAKE NEW ENEMIES #2 1 NEW SAWS or 2 THE NASTINESS CONCEALED BEHIND THE FACADE OF GRUFFNESS or 3 YOU KNOW WHO IS YOU KNOW WHAT OK 4 WARNING: HUMOR 5 TOMORROW NEVER DIES 6 DESTRUCTO 7 FIRM BUT UNFAIR 8 FRESH FROZEN AT THE PEAK OF FLAVOR 9 A MAGNET FOR SCOUNDRELS AND FOOLS 10 DANGER DANGER 11 UNFORGET 12 BLACK INFORMATION 13 THE APOTHEOSIS OF PULP 14 MEAN UGLY 15 FACT WRANGLER 16 MAGICAL THINKING 17 SELECTED POEMS: 1600 2000 18 ONLY DISCONNECT 19 IN RISO VERITAS 20 COUNTRY LIGHTS 21 UNREST RETURNS 22 LYING DEFIANCE 23 THE BOG OF UNCERTAINTY 24 CHRIST'S RESUME 25 HERO.COM 26 SUPERPOWERLESSNESS 27 A SHOW OF FARCE 28 CHRONIC AMERICAN IRONY 29 YOUNG CYNIC, OLD OPTIMIST 30 I CAN'T READ 31 MIDGET DOWN :CALL 91 32 PRAVUS VIR FORTISSIMUS 33 YOU CAN BITE MY SPINMASTER GENERAL 34 RATIONAL EXUBERENCE 35 APPROACH LAUGHTER 36 MIND BOMBS 37 MEME WARFARE 38 GEOGRAPHY OF QUAGMIRE 39 E SPIONAGE 40 CHIMP OBJECTIVISM 41 THE SALESMAN COMETH 42 DEATH OF AN ICEMAN 43 SOMEBODY'S BEEN SLEEPING IN GOD'S BED 44 CUNNING STUNTS 45 BIT ADDER 46 PENDULUM BOB 47 SOLAR TRIGGER 48 SO GOOD IT'S BAD 49 CARING NIHILIST 50 ME THIRSTY, ME WANT GLASS OF SAND 51 A NEW BRUTALITY 52 SEASONED NEWCOMER 53 SPOILED PRIEST 54 INACCURATE INSIGHTS 55 NOT SHAKESPEARE 56 NO TIME FOR HOMERS 57 JOEY HEROIN 58 ARE YOU COOL? 59 IMAGINARY PORTRAIT 60 CLANGING 61 PORTION CONTROL 62 NASTY, BRITISH AND SHORT 63 STRIKE UP THE BLAND 64 AN UNREQUESTED GIFT 65 VIRTUAL DISCONNECT 66 TO DIE FOREVER 67 ANTI BONO 68 A FOUL WEATHER FRIEND 69 DISTINGUISHED FOR IGNORANCE 70 ZEALOT ZONE 71 DEATH OF A TONE DEAF COWBOY 72 I BETRAYED THREE MASTERS 73 THE FUTURE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND ME 74 THE HOUSE OF FICTION 75 MOTIVATIONAL POISON IVY #3 1 NEW FUN or 2 IF I LIKED PEOPLE I WOULD LIKE YOU PEOPLE or 3 COLLECTED LIES or 4 IRRELEVANT SHOWOFF LEAD 5 AMATEUR OF DISGUISE 6 IMPRECISE WORDSMITH 7 HATE OF A GOOD WOMAN 8 SANCTIFIED DOGGEREL 9 CONCRETE DELTA 10 PRESIDENT OJ 11 THE OCCUPATIONAL HAZARDS OF STUPIDITY 12 THE DEMOCRATIZATION OF STATUS 13 JAB THE SKY 14 LOSERVILLE 15 GO TO VOICE 16 LEDGER A 17 THE EVIDENCE OF MY SENSES 18 UNWANTED THOUGHTS 19 COLLECTED LIES, VOLUME 10,OOO 20 SIX SIGMA 21 CRITICAL INCIDENT ANALYSIS 22 THE ARTICULATE INCOMPETENT 23 BEWARE: SOME SARCASM 24 MORE FACTS 25 TV 48 = NET 99 26 A SPECIES OF FRAUD 27 GRIM DOWN THE MERRIMENT 28 SINGLE JEOPARDY 29 AN ENGINE OF NORMALIZATION 30 HIGH SCHOOL IS A HOSPITAL WHERE THEY AMPUTATE YOUR IMAGINATION 31 GIBBERISH MASQUERADING AS DEEP CONCERN 32 SUPERFICIAL MAN 33 GAWK FACTOR 34 PROVING THEM WRONG 35 TV MAGAZINE 36 INTEGRETON: THE HIGHLY DANGEROUS HONESTY DRUG 37 MY LIFE AS COPY 38 FIELD RATION D 39 MEDICINE HEAD 40 THE KEY OF ME 41 MANIC DEFENSIVENESS 42 HANDBOOK OF NONSENSE WRITING 43 ELITE CONTENT PROVIDER 44 INTELLECTUAL NEOTENY 45 FREE BONUS 46 THE OPPOSITE OF AMUSING 47 THE BEST WAY TO GET NOTICED 48 CURTAINS FOR THE TRIOPOLY 49 OAFISH ROLE MODEL 50 SO BAD ITS REALLY BAD 51 ABANDON THOUGHT ALL YE WHO ENTER HERE 52 FLARING 53 THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS THE WORK 54 BELIEVE THE HYPE 55 MESSAGE FROM A BOTTLE 56 CHAFF FROM THE CHURL 57 A TIRED MACHINE 58 I MAY BE A PIG BUT I AM NOT STUPID 59 YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE LIE 60 DARKNESS DAWNS 61 TRUE BLIGHT 62 ILLUSION IS A REALITY 63 FEROCIOUS SOCIAL OBSERVATORY 64 TRUTH, ALL TRUTH 65 MAMMAL PRODUCTS 66 INFINITE CHAGRIN 67 NOT THE BARTLETT'S FAMILIAR QUOTATIONS 69 THAT'S WHAT THEY TELL YOU 70 FRIENDLY SCREAMING MATCH 71 WORKS OF FACTION 72 ACCESS DENIED 73 CALL SECURITY 74 BURSTING WITH FLAVOR 75 THERE IS VERY LITTLE I CAN DO #4 1 101 DAMNATIONS Or 2 BROTHER CAN YOU PARADIGM? Or 3 BENIGN POSITIONAL VERTIGO 4 TRAGIC VICTORY FASCINATION 5 THE BONFIRE OF THE INANITIES 6 WIT HAPPENS 7 BEHIND THE CLOWN'S FACE IS ANOTHER HAPPY FACE 8 SIR! THE MILITARY IS DEHUMANIZING, SIR! 9 I DON'T DO GENDER 10 GIVING EYESIGHT TO THE BLAND 11 CRAM MY GAPING BEAK WITH GRUB 12 GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENIGMAS 13 THE CHIRPING CHICK CHEEPS FORTH REVENGE 14 A GLUTTON FOR REWARD 15 3RD NATURE 16 I STAND BY MY MISSTATEMENT 17 A LIFE OF NOISY DESPERATION 18 THIS ARE A JOB FOR ILLITERATE MAN 19 AN ENCYCLOPEDIA OF AMERICANA 20 ALMOST MORE FAMOUS THAN MYSELF 21 HETERO MAGAZINE 22 WHITE BUSINESS MONTHLY 23 LOOKING FOR MEANING AND A WAY TO BE GOOD 24 REBELLION FREAK 25 STUPID DUH JOKES 26 TO KNOW EVERYTHING OF WHAT HAPPENED BEFORE YOU WERE BORN IS TO REMAIN FOREVER A CICERO 27 JUST BECAUSE I'M A GENIUS DON'T ASSUME I CAN CREATE 28 THE DEMOCRACY OF PAIN 29 UNEXPECTED LACK OF DEMAND 30 MIND@COM 31 SIC SIMPER TYRANNIS 32 INEPTITUDE TEST 33 A LONG DAY'S JOURNEY INTO DEATH OF A STREETCAR NAMED GODOT 34 LEARN FROM THE MASTER 35 STRIKE & FADE 37 CHANGE AND PREVAIL 38 SOUL CATCHER 2525 39 FAST FOOD MYTHOS 40 CONDITION ORANGE 41 SUBSTANCE P 42 TARGET BITING SATIRE 43 SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE NONSENSE 44 SHAMELESSLY DISGUISED 45 I LOVE YOUR ANGER 46 SUPERPIG 47 PROLETARIAN HAUTEUR 48 RADIOACTIVE TUMBLEWEEDS 49 PSYCHIC ENEMIES NETWORK 50 COMIC BOOK HELL 51 MIND CHILDREN 52 MORE LINKS TO SELL THE PRODUCT 53 FAR OLDER AND FAR LESS WISE 54 ORIGINAL CONTENT 55 PROFOUND ANGER: EPONYMOUS LP 56 TODAY IS 57 A GIANT STEP IN MANY DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS AT ONCE 58 A HOT FLASH OF TOXIC PSYCHOSIS 59 SLIME THERAPY 60 BRAIN ATTACKS 61 CONSIDER THE SOURCE 62 VERY CLOSE TO THE LINE OF TREASON 63 SUGGESTED RETAIL 64 SOMEWHERE A CLOCK STRIKES EVERY MINUTE 65 THOUGHT STEW 66 FEATS OF RESCUED SANITY 67 HEAD FOREMOST INTO THE BOUNDLESS 68 REHEARSALS FOR CREMATION 69 TRANSLATING PLUTO 70 A TRUE KNACK FOR MAKING PEOPLE VICIOUS 71 ANSWER IN THE SUBJECT LINE 72 CONTEMPTUOUS REGARD 73 PLEASE INSERT A WITTY QUOTATION 74 I'M JESUS, YOUR PAL 75 OFFICIAL SPONSORS OF HIS HOLINESS #5 1 JOKES THAT ALMOST GOT ME KILLED Or 2 IN A WORLD WHERE ALL MOVIE TRAILERS BEGIN LIKE THIS... Or 3 DON'T YOU REMEMBER ME? I'M THE GUY WHO GAVE YOU THE AMNESIA PILLS! Or 4 WE THOROUGHLY DESPISE UNSOLICITED MANUSCRIPTS 5 MORAL HAZARD ZONE 6 JOKE NOIR 7 THE PASSWORD IS PASSWORD 8 CORPORATIZATION OF FOLKLORE 9 BAM BAM BAM FORMAT 10 UNHAPPY HUMAN CINDERS 11 BONE DOGGIE 12 FLAMING HATE 13 ELIMINATE THE MIDDLEMAN BECAUSE HE HAS A FUNNY NAME 14 CLASS BASED CULTURAL AUTHORITY 15 PAP ABOUNDS 16 NONCOMPREHENSIBLE DRIBBLE 17 THE KREMLIN TABLET 18 SUBMISSION GUIDELINES 19 EXIT STRATEGY 20 THE KIND OF GOD IT IS THAT WOULD DO SUCH A THING 21 INTOLERABLE DEMOCRACY 22 HAVE A NICE DAY...ASSHOLE 23 YES TO THE ETERNAL DEBT 24 PROJECT NITROGEN 25 SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTION 26 THE REST IS SCIENCE 27 DARK TRIANGLE 28 ROLLING BLACKOUTS 29 MILLENNIUM COMMANDO 30 THE CANADIAN CONNECTION 31 THERE'S NOTHING SADDER THAN A SUPERANNUATED FUNNYMAN 32 GENTLE BUT UNFAIR 33 THAT ISN'T CUTE AT ALL 34YOU DEFY? ANIMAL?! 35 NO, PAL SCREW YOU!!! 36 MSCONFIG 37 CULTURAL RUBBISH 38 FREE ALL APOLITICAL PRISONERS 39 DR. SOUL 40 WORD OF EYE 41 VIRAL MARKETING 42 A SHARP MIND AND AN ABILITY TO DELIVER HYSTERICAL SPEECHES 43 IGNORE ALL FORECASTS 44 THE MORONIC INFERNO 45 CENTER FOR THE STUDY OF PROLETARIAN CULTURE 46 AN END TO ALL QUESTIONS 47 THE MECHANICAL JACOBIN 48 THINGS FROM OUTER SPACE 49 HIGHLIGHTS FOR ADULTS 50 COMMAND ERROR 51 SALES OF A DEATHMAN 52 ACCESSIBLE FIRE 53 NO SECOND USE 54 INTOLERABLY BRILLIANT 55 1BC/1AD PROBLEM 56 CLEARER THAN THE TRUTH 57 THE MOVIE IS ALWAYS BETTER THAN THE BOOK 58 FACTS WORTH MENTIONING 59 GHOSTS OF THE FUTURE 60 FALLING INTO NOTHING 61 A SAD EDEN 62 A JUDAS BIOGRAPHY 63 MY ANGER IS COOL BUT YOURS IS JUST STUPID 64 FUNGAL ALLIES 65 A BAD PERSON IN THE BEST SENSE OF THE WORD 66 HONESTVILLE 67 CLEAN, WELL FED ANIMALS 68 SHUT UP, PINK MEAT 69 Y2K Y JELLY 70 SPIN DECADE 71 OUR MYTHOLOGY IS THE COMMODIFICATION OF ALL MYTH 72 THE WORLD IS A WEB OF DARKNESS 73 EASYGOING NIHILISM 74 SING ME A PICTURE AND I'LL PAINT YOU A SONG #6 1. THAT'S NOT SICK; THAT'S FUNNY OR 2. LEARNED IN PECULIAR WAYS OR 3. NEW STUFF YOU WANT TO NEED OR 4. POLYMATHIC GENERALIZER 5. ROLL YOUR EYES AT ME 6. THE LOSERS CAN ALSO WRITE HISTORY 7. WRIGHT OR RONG 8. UNIVERSAL STANDARD OF ERROR 9. HERE COMES THE FREEDOM MAN 10. AN EGO WITH A MAN ATTACHED 11. THE ADVENTURES OF SHALLOW RED 12. OPINIONS I GIVE AWAY FREE 13. PLASTIC DEMON OF REVOLUTION 14. CASUALTIES OF PEACE 15. DONE DOING NOTHING 16. LOOKING FOR LIFE IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES 17. THE REASON IS BECAUSE 18. BEYOND CATEGORY 19. THE ANCIENT POETIC VOICE OF SATIRE 20. GLOOM MERCHANT 21. THE SYCOPHANT HOUR 22. FUN MILITARY INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX 23. OCCASION FREQUENCY 24. OXYMORONIC BANNERS 25. EXCESSIVE INDIVIDUALISM 26. EMBOURGEOISEMENT 27. OM.COM 28. THE BOUNDARIES OF ACCEPTABLE OPINION 29. THE VILE MAXIMS OF THE MASTER 30. TULIPMANIA.COM 31. AGREED FRAMEWORK 32. BETWEEN THE AUTHOR AND THE WORLD 33. SCREAM THE NAME OF THE DEITY 34. ASK; TELL 35. LYING UNDER OAF 36. I WANT YOU TO DISREGARD ME 37. FACTORY OF LIES 38. SOCRATIC MONOLOGUE 39. TRUTH BREAKER 40. PATTERN OF REPRESENTATIONS 41. LAUGHTER IN HEAVEN 42. PLEASE DON'T LIE AND SAY I HAVE A PERSECUTION COMPLEX 43. ABSTINENCE MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER 44. SALUS POPULI EST SUPREMA REX 45. A VICARIOUS PEEP SHOW OF CELEBRITIES AND DEMONS 46. IMPERIAL POSSE 47. THE BEST OF MADNESS 48. THE EVERLASTING MONDAY 49. HERE TODAY! 50. CLAWS TO THE WEAK 51. PROOF OF THE WILL TO LIVE 52. ROUTINE GOVERNS 53. HAPPY VALLEY GHETTO 54. YES COMMENT 55. PLEASE DON'T PHOTOGRAPH MY ART 56. SPEAK TRUTH TO POWERLESSNESS, LIES TO POWER 57. ME NO IGNORANT 58. MINDLESS ANIMALS WEARING DIAPERS 59. CHOLESTROL FREE SUICIDE 60. HOBOISM 61. ADVICE SQUAD 62. SLOW FRIENDS 63. TOUCHING THAT DIAL 64. BIBLE PUSSY 65. MY INSIGHTS LACK STAMINA 66. REGARDE MOI DROIT DANS LES YEUX! 67. DEAR MR. KAT 68. CHIMPS AHOY 69. AGING GRACELESSLY 70. DEMONIZE THE VILLAIN DU JOUR 71. INFRINGEMENT ZONE 72. UNIRONIC ENJOYMENT SUCCESSFULLY SIMULATED 73. THE BIG DREAM OF THE MODERN 74. A MECHANICAL IMITATION OF THE CONVENTIONAL 75. A WALKING TALKING SELECTIVE SEROTONIN REUPTAKE INHIBITOR #7 1. PATRIOTIC AMERICAN OR 2. WHEN A SMART BOMB MEETS A DUM DUM BULLET OR 3. INTERMINABLE CONTROVERY OVER MINOR QUESTIONS OR 4. CONSPICUOUS PRESUMPTION 5. EXPLOITATION? YOU'RE SOAKING IN IT! 6. MY POLICE STATE, RIGHT OR WRONG 7. THE MYTH OF QWERTY 8. BABY'S FIRST ICE CREAM 9. HUMAN TRUTHS OF LAUGHING SIGNIFICANCE 10. LOOK OUT ABOVE 11 COP AND BLOW 12. GIVE ME TOMORROW 13. KALEIDOSCOPIC LIES 14. THE EDGE OF CHAOS 15. THE BROTHERHOOD OF STRONG MEN 16. ICONOGRAPHY OF HATE 17. WWW.CARTUNES.COM 18. TWO SIDED PLAYING CARDS 19. A POWERLESS ENEMY 20. EMPTY REASONS 21. SPEED AND JUNIOR 22. POVERTY IN MOTION 23. BLITZKREIG CARICATURE 24. THE ‘WHATEVER' YEARS 25. NOT A NOT A PROBLEM 26. VERNACULAR 27.THAT'S " MISTER" SPYMASTER TO YOU 28. IMAGINARY HOBO 29. COME INTO THE HUGE 30. FRAME OF REFERENCE 31. BACK TO MERE MORTAL 32. RAGE GRACEFULLY 33. EXPENSIVE NIHILISM 34. SAME PROGRAM ON BOTH SIDES 35. MICKEY KANGAROO AND DONALD PLATYPUS 36. SELF EXPLOITATION 37. PATHETIC COHERENCE 38. PLAISIRS MINUSCULES 39. MEME GAMES 40. SUBVERTISING 41. MEAT TOP 42. SUBMISSION CREEP 43. PRESIDENT WHITEHOUSE 44. ANARCHO ELITIST 45. LOST WINNERS 46. THE SOCIOLOGY OF IGNORANCE 47. HERMENEUTIC HOOTCHY KOO 48. UGLY COMEDY 49. CANDY COATED POPCORN, PEANUTS AND A BOMB 50. THE COWARDICE OF MY OWN CONVICTIONS 51. A NEAR MISS 52. SO CLOSE TO HEAVEN AND JUST AS CLOSE TO HELL 53. ONE MORE HIT 54. HOOTING, JABBERING PRIMATES 55. EARTH O 56. THE STRONGEST LOSE 57. THE NEED FOR COGNITION 58. RISK FREE DANGER 59. ANTICIPATING THE PAST 60. NUKE THE SUN 61. CHATTERY MONKS 62. MONEYMAN 63. THERE WAS A GOD 64. ABASHED JUNK 65. SPECIAL ISSUE 66. NO FUN ZONE 67. SUPERFATSO 68. THE EVIL OPPOSITE OF LITERATURE 69. IF ANYTHING 70. SABOR A TODO VOLUMEN 71. NATIONAL MEDIA TALKING HEAD 72. OLD ALTERNATIVES 73. GOING AFTER THE INS 74.TOO WRONG FOR TOO LONG 75. VISUALIZE WORLD POLICE #8 ADULT ILLUSIONS Or 2. A FALSE MYTHOLOGY OF MODERN LIFE Or 3. SUGGESTIVE LITTLE WORD FRAGMENTS 4. SAVE AS WEB PAGE 5. RENT A JEREMIAD 6. DROP THE NOSTALGIA AND SLOWLY BACK AWAY 7. SIGNATURE TOXIN 8. ALL ABOARD FOR... LA...ZY...TOW...N 9. THE MOST HUMILIATING ORDEAL OF MY LIFE 10. OVERCOMING HOPEFULNESS 11. OLD ALTERNATIVES 12. GOING AFTER THE IN CROWD 13. CAPTAIN TNT AKA SIR DYNAMITE 14. THE DEFINITIVE BIOGRAPHY 15. PLUTONIUM AND STYROFOAM 16. A MECCA FOR VULGARIANS 17. PHWOAR 18. STEALING THE MILK OF OTHER ANIMALS 19. SATAN LOVES ME, THIS I KNOW 20. VIVAN LAS CADENAS 21. A SAD PERMANENT TWILIGHT 22. FALSE EX VOTOS 23. NATIONAL MEDIA TALKING HEADS 24. GIRL TRAP 25. NICE WORK IF YOU CAN'T GET IT 26. POSH YOBS 27. TIME & AGAIN 28. AWAY WITH WORDS 29. FORGET ART 30. ANONYMOUS BUT SIGNED 31. IN EVERY LINE 32. LESS AMBITIOUS 33. HOW.TO 34. IMPUNITY 35. SUBSTANTIATED RUMORS 36. DERIVATIVE POWER 37. THE NEW YORKER FOR BASTARDS 38. EPONYMOUS DEBUT NOVEL 39. ALBUM 40. DANCE CRASHER 41. INCONSISTENTLY RELIABLE 42. A SLOPPY FORTUNE 43. LOUSY ICE 44. DANGEROUSLY SAFE 45. PROBALISTIC CRUCIVERBALIST 46. CRAWLING OVER THE WATER 47. STARLINGS AND COCKROACHES 48. THE TWITCHING HOUR 49. PRETTY IN PUNK 50. LOST IN THE CIRCUS 51. A BREEEDING GROUND FOR DEMOGOGUES 52. SAVANT IDIOT 53. GOD'S CHRISTENING 54. OVERNIGHT STOPS IN ANTHROPOLOGY 55. BAD GENIUS 56. VICTIMOLOGY 57. ALL PURPOSE INSANITY PLEA 58. VEXED BY DEMONS THAT HAUNT US ALL 59. SHOWING ON 60. FLY IN THE FLY IN THE OINTMENT 61. FAITHFUL AMANUENSES 62. BROTHER NUMBER ONE 63. MR. VIOLENCE 64. BLAME OTHERS FOR YOUR SINS 65. ANONYMOUS BUSINESSMAN 66. SHOOTFIRE 67. SPACE EATER 68. TURNCOAT FIREBRANDS 69. FEVERISH SOFTCORE HUMPING 70. THIS IS RIDICULOUS 71. SOLD FOR THE ENCOURAGEMENT OF DISEASE ONLY 72. NEWS YOU CAN'T USE, FROM SOURCES YOU CAN'T TRUST 73. WE NEED SUPRESSION 74. TOO WRONG FOR TOO LONG #9 1. DEVIATIONS FROM THE PREPARED TEXT 2. BOXCUTTER MORALITY 3. STEALTH INSANITY DEFENSE 4. I OWN THE POLICE 5. FREE BEER, FREE FOOD, AND A GOOD TIME FOR NOTHING 6. THE SKILL SET TO BE PRESIDENT 7. IRONY DEFICIENCY 8. THAT IT CAN BE DANGEROUS MAKES IT SAFE 9. A GENIUS EAR 10. DOT.COMMISSARS 11. THE LOATHINGS OF A SICK MIND 12. BORING OLD MADNESS 13. A MIRACULOUS DRAUGHT OF RED HERRINGS 14. WILDLY READ 15. SON OF NINTENDO 16. THROWBACK CODE 17. HAVE ISSUES 18. THE CHILDREN OF STRUCTURED ENTERTAINMENT 19. THE BUILT ENVIRONMENT 20. PATRON SAINT OF BLACK MAGIC 21. PRESIDENT COCAINE 22. FEEL BAD NOSTALGIA 23. SOOTHING TO MARIJUANA IRRITATED THROATS 24. AMERICA'S COMMONPLACE PROMISE 25. RUSKS AND PORK RINDS 26. NEGATIVE ENTITY 27. CULTURAL DOGMA 28. IRRITABLE PATRIOTISM 29. CATHEDRAL OF EROTIC MISERY 30. INTEGRATED CHAOS 31. COMBAT 18 32. WINDY SELF SATISFACTIONS 33. BC (BEFORE COMPUTERS) 34. THE SENSATION OF A JADED EUROPE 35. SAVE THE FIRE 36. VIRUS MELT 37. THE LIMIT'S THE SKY 38. ENVELOPED IN PRIVILEGE 39. AN UNDERSTANDABLE MISTAKE 40. THE NEW FALL HITLER LINE 41. UNQUALIFIED EXPERTS 42. A FUNHOUSE MIRROR OF CAPITALISM 43. NOTOWN 44. LOUDMOUTH SHAMAN 45. IT'S NOT ABOUT ME: AN ANTI MEMOIR 46. THE HOLDEN CAULFIELD MURDER MYSTERY 47. ARCHITECT OF MY OWN UNDOING 48. JUNK OPERA 49. USE ONCE AND DESTROY 50. BEGIN DOWNLOAD NOW 51. THE OPPOSITE OF SUBTLE 52. NO IDEOLOGY PLEASE, WE'RE AMERICANS 53. VOYEUR OF MY OWN OBSCURITIES 54. GENOCIDE MY ASS! 55. THE BRUTE FACTS OF PHYSICAL EXISTENCE 56. NOT EVEN SMART ENOUGH TO BE WRONG 57. CALL ME SHAKESPEARE 58. SEE AN END TO THE NUISANCE 59. IT IS AS IF IT IS 60. NEURAL CLONE 61. ECHELON 62. GEEK PROFILING 63. EMBEDDEDNESS 64. BOOMERABILIA 65. CAVEMAN PSYCHIATRIST 66. SUPERFATSO BROKE MY CAR 67. THE IMPERATIVE OF SNAPPY SIMPLICITY 68. A COARSE INCOHERENCE 69. INHUMAN INTEREST STORY 70. ELECTRIC BOOKMARK 71. WARP SLOTH 72. HANGING BY DEATH 73. CARNE DEL POVERO 74. FASTER THAN THE SPEED OF REASON #10 1. BROUGHT TO YOU BY...THESE COOL NEW PRODUCTS! OR 2. REASONS THAT RESEMBLE COMPULSIONS 3. SYNTHETIC GEMUTLICHKEIT 4. THE GREAT CHAIN OF BUYING 5. THANK YOU FOR VISITING MOUNT ASBESTOS, QUEBEC 6. HYPE INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX 7. CULTURAL EQUITY 8. THE GREAT FEAR OF 1999 9. A DARK MIRROR OF THE AMERICAN CHARACTER 10. FASTEN HAZARD BELTS 11. STEEL, HORSES, WRITTEN ALPHABETS AND THE WHEEL 12. IMAGE SALAD 13. AN ICON FOR IDIOCY 14. A SYSTEMATIC ASSAULT ON REALITY 15. HERE GOES EVERYTHING 16. GOD'S OWN MAGAZINE 17. THERE ARE CERTAIN THINGS TOO SACRED TO BE MOCKED BY BEATNIKS 18. AMERICAN FANTASIES 19. LIFE IN THE U.S. AND CANADA 20. AS TOLD TO 21. COP AND BLOW 22. A VERY FRIENDLY RIOT 23. DAY'S BEEN LONG IT SEEMS LIKE SLOW MOTION 24. THE NIGHT BEFORE 25. ARNT A SKITSO 26. USQUE AD NAUSEUM 27. CERAMIC TITANS AND PORCELAIN GODS 28. PRESBYOPIA 29. THAT'S WHEN I REACH FOR MY MACHETE 30. RECOURSE TO EXTREME MEASURES 31. EDENTATE 32. GO LEGIT 33. WHEN CHIMPS CRY 34. THE NEW BLACK 35. INTELLIGENT PAPER 36. THE POLITICAL AFFILIATIONS OF COMIC STRIP CHARACTERS 37. CRAZY BREAD 38. SUSPENDED DECOMPOSITION 39. UNSHARE 40. GREAT BALLS ON FIRE 41. DYSFUNCTIONAL SPRAWLTOWN 42. GREETINGS FROM GUN BARREL CITY, TEXAS 43. THE LITTLE PICTURE 44. NO HIT WONDERS 45. WANKING TRAMPS 46. ESPERANTO FOR BEGINNERS 47. INSULTING STATE INSTITUTIONS 48. JFK, DETECTIVE 49. LET US RISK ALL FOR THE BLUE HELMETS 50. EXPEDIENT WRATH 51. SELF BIO 52. WWW.HELP.COM 53. REPLACE WITH POPEYE 54. KING COP 55. HOW TO PESTER: THE PRECOCIOUS CHILD'S HANDBOOK 56. THE FLOATING STANDARD 57. PROTOKNOWING 58. MY LANDLORD, MR CUSTODIO 59. THE TOP 10 TRAITS OF THE COMPULSIVE ENUMERATOR 60. FIE! FOR SHAME! 61. THE JOLLY TEARS OF IDIOCY 62. JESUS TAKES SIDES 63. DATED FUTURISM 64. SLY DOGS 65. SHUNPIKING 66. HORNIER THAN THOU 67. THE EARTH MINUS AMERICA 68. SIMPLY UNACCEPTABLE 69. SUNNY STUPIDITY 70. A RELISH FOR ARMAGEDDON 71. A GADFLY STRONGER THAN ITS HOST 72. SUPEREAGLE 73. THORN AND IZZARD 74. FORGET IT, JAKE IT'S HALLOWEEN 75. GET IN, SIT DOWN, SHUT UP, HOLD ON! #11 1. STUPEFACTION GUARANTEED OR YOUR MONEY BACK IF WE CAN REMEMBER WHERE WE PUT IT! OR 2. NOTES ON THE MARGINS OF THE UNIVERSE OR 3. SATELLITE CULTURE 4. HIS MASTER'S NOISE 5. DEMONIZING THE DEVIL 6. KILL THE ANCHORMAN 7. THE ETIQUETTE OF FEAR AND LOATHING 8. WHERE DOGS WOULD HOWL TO LIE 9. REBELS AGAINST THE PAST 10. TILDA.COM 11. CHEER UP, SLEEPY JESUS 12. CRIMINALS IN THIS WORLD OF FEAR 13. OLD MAN MOTHER 14. THE RELENTLESS EXPANSE OF MINIMALISM 15. IPERMARCATI 16. NOIR OR LESS 17. A NOVEL! 18. A WORDLESS BOOK 19. CHERNOBYL IN SLOW MOTION 20. ROGUE SUPERPOWER 21. SELLING THE SOFT SECTIONS 22. TURGID IRONY 23. THE TYRANNY OF WATER 24. THE WEARIN' O' THE PURPLE 25. UNVERIFIED CLAIMS FROM UNNAMED GOVERNMENT SOURCES 26. 100% FACT FREE 27. GIVE THE VAGABOND A POTATO AND SEND HIM ON HIS WAY 28. OUTRIGHT LIES 29. THE UNBRIBED SOUL 30. THE DREADED RETURN OF THE OUTSIZED FEDORA 31. BOLOGNA PEDDLERS 32. THE EXETER ABLATIVE 33. SOFT POWER 34. DR. POLICEMAN, ESQUIRE 35. YOU ONLY HAVE TIME TO EXPLODE 36. CONTAINING AMERICA 37. VATICAN PURPLE AND YAHWEH BLUE 38. YYYADK (YEAH, YEAH, YET ANOTHER DEAD KENNEDY) 39. THIS IS NOT AN OUTRAGE 40. RADON MINDS 41. LEMON WEDGES 42. A SLIGHT REVOLT 43. THE AGE OF TACKY 44. THE WORST AUTHORITY 45. IGNORE THAT CURTAIN BEHIND THE MAN 46. AND THAT'S OFFICIAL 47. HISTORY OF THE FUTURE 48. A HIP CORNBALL 49. MY WEB TO ME A KINGDOM IS 50. MEDIA SCRUM 51. SOME DISORDERED EXTERIOR GEOGRAPHIES 52. THE BIG MOG TAPE 53. ELDERBERRY OR DANDELION? 54. READLESS.COM 55. ACT 60 56. ALTERNATIVE BEGINNINGS 57. AN ELECTRIFYING MIXTURE OF INSPIRATION AND MALICE 58. ZONED FOR BUSINESS, NOT BEAUTY 59. HEROIC PESSIMISM 60. BEST LIGHT 61. LINEAR EDITING 62. REPAIRING THE FOURTH WALL 63. MOOD GENES 64. THE WRONG SOLUTION 65. CONTROL BY OMISSION 66. BRING INTO THE LIGHT THAT DARKNESS AS DARKNESS 67. GOSSIP, CORRUPTION AND CHATTER 68. THE UNUSUAL SUSPECTS 69. SPECIAL SECURITY CONCERNS 70. LIFESTYLE RAGE 71. PEDIGREE CHUM 72. MUPPET MISSILE CRISIS 73. THE URGENT PRESSURES OF INVOLUNTARY EXPERIENCE 74. FILTHY ANIMALS I COMMAND YOU TO LOVE ME! 75. TERMINAL SELF INDULGENCE #12 1. BALLYHOO 2000 OR 2. THE TROUBLEMAKER'S ENCYCLOPEDIA OR 3. THE MOST SIGNIFICANT TRIVIAL THING IN RECENT MEMORY 4. UNSEEN BEHIND THE SCENES 5. I AM STILL A COMPELLING AND RELEVANT FIGURE 6. THE SEARCH FOR MY ROBOT ANCESTORS 7. LAUGH OUT LOUD TRAGIC 8. Y2K DEFIANCE 9. MAKING THE BEATLES LOOK LIKE FOUR FUCKING YOGI BEARS 10. POISONOUS LITTLE MAN 11. MY FUGUE AND WELCOME TO IT 12. KING MIDAS IN REVERSE 13. TELL ME MY CHARMS ASPIRE TO GREATNESS OR I'LL KILL YOU 14. UNDIVINELY DISCONTENTED 15. IS IT WAR? THEY WILL NEED THE ORGONE! 16. AN INSUBSTANTIAL IMMORTALITY 17. FUNDAMENTAL IRRESOLUTION 18. THE CORDLESS FREEDOM 19. DOUBLE FORWARD SLASH 20. ERSATZ FAKE,QUASI IMPOSTERAND CRYPTO COUNTERFEIT 21. OOOOOOKAY 22. LAY ME IN A SCUPPER FOR A SWAB 23. DAMN YOU, PEASANT WHY WON'T YOU DIE? 24. NOT EVEN FALSE 25. GENDER ARMAGEDDON 26. LAME GIANTS 27. THE SAME OLD WHITE MALE MESSENGERS 28. THE VICE OF ACEDIA 29. 100,000 CRIMINALS 30. PRISONERS OF I.Q. 31. BRVTY: SL OF W 32. WHAT SORRY STRENGTH, WHAT PROUD WEAKNESS 33. COUNTERFEIT UNCTION 34. THE TREASURY OF MERIT 35. MR. ZERO 36. MY DARK AND GOLDEN AGES 37. JESUS, SHIELD THE SUN 38. CHAUCER'S PARROT 39. TRULY UNSAVORY JOYCEAN GRAFFITI 40. BARROOMS, MOTHER, THE FLAG, AND GOOD LOOKING LARGE WOMEN 41. POINTLESS JUKING AND JIVING 42. STEALTH LOBBYISTS 43. FAWNING PUFF PIECE 44. WHAT WILL BUSH DO FOR QUASI LITERATES AND FORMER ALCOHOLICS? 45. A TAXONOMY OF CHAOS 46. WHAT IS THIS THING YOU EARTH MEN CALL "IRONY"? 47. DATA MINING 48. HUMBLE GREATNESS, FOOLISH GENIUS AND ETERNAL TRANSCIENCE 49. BLUE FUZZ 50. UGLY CRANKERY 51. FAUX WORKING CLASS 52. SECTARIAN VANITY PROJECT 53. A NEW CRITIQUE OF TREASON 54. BURNISHED HOMILIES AND AIRBRUSHED CLICHES 55.YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME ONCE 56. LETTERS OF COMPLAINT 57. ALL CATS GO TO HELL, EXCEPT MY HODGE THEY SHAN'T HURT MY HODGE 58. SOME ACCIDENTS 59. THROBBINGS OF NOONTIDE 60. A WILDLY SPICED ATTACK 61. HIS MASTER'S VICE 62. MEMORY REMAINS 63. LEGACY CODE 64. MY LITTLE BUDDY, RUSTY THE TRUSTY 65. TOKEN YOB 66. BATTERY CHICKENS PLAYING COMPUTER GAMES 67. PROTON, IOTA, THE GERM, AND MASTODON PROTOZOON 68. HAT CRIMES 69. 1962: THE YEAR OF DECISION 70. THE ADVENTURES OF ‘HASH' BROWN 71. THE MODERN SYNTHESIS 72. THE FORGOTTEN HISTORY OF AMNESIA 73. FAH DUH SEE ECKLUH 74. UNAUTHORIZED HAGIOGRAPHY 75. WHILE THE WORLD ABOUT ME RAGES, I'LL GO BACK TO THE MEDIA AGES #13 1. METHODICAL ARTIFICER OF MY OWN DESTINY OR 2. THE BIG TRAMP OR 3. THE IDIOT'S GUIDE TO RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT 4. FROM THE IMPRESSIVE TO THE INSUFFERABLE 5. THE UNCENSORED HISTORY OF UNCLE SAM 6. HECTORING PEASANTS TO MODERNIZE 7. SHOW OF HEAD 8. THAT'S SO SAD I'LL PRAY FOR YOU 9. IN THE MIX 10. A TWO HOUR MEAT PARADE 11. BARKING MAD 12. QUA QUA QUA 13. CYBERSQUATTING 14. TROUBLE RIGHT HERE IN RIVER CITY 15. LOWER THAN THE SHIT AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA 16. RANDOM FOOLISHNESS 17. EXPENSIVE SENTENTIOUSNESS 18. FRICTIONLESS OPTIMISM 19. A LAYERED COMPLACENCY 20. NOT REAL CARROTS AT ALL 21. LONE ASSASSIN CERTAINTY 22. BARKING INTO THE FUTURE 23. WHEN ALL THAT'S SAID AND DONE IS DEAD AND GONE 24. THE ABSURD TOPICALITY OF EVERYTHING 25. PLANET XYY 26. ENCYCLOPEDIC IGNORANCE 27. THE REITERATION OF OLD CERTAINTIES 28. FRESH BANALITIES 29. MUCKERISM 30. CFUK 31. THE RANDOM EPHEMERA OF AN INFINITE FLEA MARKET 32. AS ONE MIGHT IMAGINE 33. BIRTHDAY MAN 34. I'LL SEE YOU IN REALITY 35. ABSOLUTLY NO CONTEXT WHATSOEVER 36. SCHOOL OF ONE, DEFINITELY 37. THE SCRIPT IS PRISON 38. THE LOWER CREATION 39. CONSUMERISMO 40. SHORTCUTS TO THE ID 41. TIME SINKS 42. WHO WE ARE WHEN WE CRY 43. RUTHLESS COMPASSION 44. DEAD MAN'S TALK 45. SHOW MOTION COUP D'ETAT 46. BLACK HOLE VERTIGO 47. JUSTICE IS NO MORE THAN A LUXURY 48. DIS IS A JOB FER GUN MAN 49. TIME CAPSULE FOR THE ZEITGESIT 50. THE MORONIC INFERNO 51. WORLD CLASS MISFIT 52. POETRY MAN AND THE ACADEMY OF VERSIFLASTERS 53, THE BALLAD OF ARMAGEDDEON CLAMPETT 54. PULSE: THE DISRUPTER 55. A CERTAIN EVENTUALITY 56. OWL STRETCHING 57. MERE STORIES 58. VERILY, WHAT PROFITETH IT A MAN, IF HE GAINETH THE CRISPY FRIES AND THEREBY LOSETH HIS IMMORTAL SOUL? 59. CHICK COUNTRY 60. PAINBALL 61. GOODY BAGS 62. FARTING WANKERS IN A SNIGGERING RATPACK 63. I FIND THAT EASY TO BELIEVE 64. HOLOCAUST AFFIRMATION 65. MR. ALWAYS RIGHT 66. ACCESS THE FORCE CONTINUUM 67. THE INFINITE VARIETY OF INDIVIDUAL EXPERIENCE 68. EMISSARY TO THE IGNORANT 69. SECOND PERSON PLURAL 70. THE LOVE SONG OF J. ALFRED ANNIHILO 71. YESTOWN 72. CLONE WITHA A BROKEN HEART 73. SUPPLEMENTARY MATERIALS BRIEFLY ANNOTATED 74. AND SO I SIT BETWEEN ALL STOOLS FOREVER 75. WILD JANUARIES #14 1. THE TROUBLEMAKER'S ENCYCLOPEDIA 2. WHAT MANNER OF MAN DOTH DARE DECLARE ME POMPOUS? 3. THE LAZINESS OF UNNECESSARY COMPLEXITY 4. THE SULTAN OF SCHADENFREUDE 5. WORKING FOR CHIMP CHANGE 6. FREQUENCY ANALYSIS 7. MUTTER MACHINE 8. THE NEW INDUSTRIAL DIVINITY 9. THE MAYOR OF ALL GOOD TIMES 10. THE MONEY BOYS 11. SLUGGART OF ARRAY 12. DESIGNATED DISSIDENT 13. ECCENTRIC SCOOP 14. THE WISDOM OF NONSENSE 15. JUVENESCENCE 16. EVERYTHING IS COPY 17. A CHEERFUL RECORD OF AMERICAN SELFISHNESS 18. ANCIENT OF WONDER 18. POOR BEYOND THE DREAMS OF AVARICE 19. AIRHEAD APPARENT 20. SWINDLE SHEET 21. THE ILLITERATES' DIGEST 22. TRADITION MUST CHANGE 23. SHIFTED IDEA LANDSCAPE 24. LNG DY'S NGHT: A DRMA 25. A MINUSCULE BORE 26. MINI BIG 27. MR. JOURNALISM 28. FLAMING HOT POOP IS MY MIDDLE NAME 29. WWW.2001.COM 30. EVERYBODY UNDERSTANDS ME 31. DONE 32. OUR SO CALLED HISTORY 33. I AM YOUR EXACT OPPOSITE 34. MOPEY AMERICANA VIBE 35. A PROFESIONAL MR. ANGRY 36. A PERIODIC TABLE OF HISTORIOGRAPHY 37. A SERIOUS DISCUSSION OF THE SUBSTANTIVE ISSUES 38. ORTHODOX RADICALS 39. A RETREAT TO FORM 40. WHAT WAS ONCE THE FUTURE 41. ACRES OF GUFF 42. THE BEST...WHO EVER... 43. ENTRANCES AND EXITS 44. WWW.DEICIDE.COM 45. COLLABORATIVE FALTERING 46. TARNISHED SUPERLATIVES 47. LEARN FROM THE MASTER 48. IRONY "RULES," "OK?" 49. C&W = WHITE BLUES 50. MISTAKES TO TRY 51. SOY BABY 52. WSFH FM: WE'RE STUPID FUCKING HIPPIES 53. THE ADVENTURES OF IMPERIALIST BEAR AND NEW SOVIET MAN 54. ARCHAIC 20TH CENTURY WEBSITES 55. NOWHERE IN THE MEDIA 56. BLUNDERS MY WAY 57. UPDATING THE TIMELESS 58. HATE WILL FIND A WAY 59. STYROFOAM VERBIAGE 60. WHO MURDERED MY YOUTHFUL DREAMS? 61. DUELIN' NARRATORS: A HACK'S POTBOILER IN THREE ACTS 62. CANDYLAND OF VIOLENCE 63. GENTLE SARGE 64. TRAFFIC POLICE STATE 65. MINCULPOP 66. DIGNIFIED INSANITY 67. I AM NOT DOPE ADDICT 68. ENSLAVED BY A FAD 69. YOUNG TEEN ACUTELY UNAWARE OF BEING AN INSIDER 70. WWW.THEINFORMATION.COM 71. PUT FOR PAID 72. CHILDISH FEARS 73. PROFESSOR SARGASSO 74. TO WHOEVER READS THIS: I LOVE YOU 75. I AM NOT INCAPABLE OF FIN #15 1. NEW AND IN THE WAY or 2. JUST AN OLD FASHIONED HATE SONG or 3. SCOURGING THE PRESENT or 4. THE OLD ADVENTURES OF PLAGIARISM MAN 5. POVERTY TRICKLES UP 6. 3RD REICH FROM THE SUN 7. DOPO LAVORO 8. FOOL OF THE WEST 9. AN HONORARY PROLETARIAN 10. THE REFEREE IS AN ELITIST 11. COUNTER POUNDERS 12. HOPELESSLY FAMOUS 13. MULTISLACKING 14. A CLUBBABLE MORON 15. BEYOND __NDERFUL 16. THE THROW YOUR VOTE AWAY PARTY 17. HONK IF YOU LOVE THE LEADER'S ANTI HONKING ORDINANCE 18. TRADITION MAN 19. VULTURE'S COFFEE 20. DR. FUN THE MAGIC CLOWN 21. A SLEAZY COPYCAT 22. WE'RE ALL SOMEBODY'S IDIOT 23. 40 FITS IN 30 SECONDS 24. SHOUTING WATERBOY IN A CROWDED THEATRE 25. THE BLACK BOOK OF CAPITALISM 26. OBEDIENT SERVANT OF THE ESTABLISHED ORDER 27. WRONG PREDICTIONS 28. ZOOM DOWN 29. DON'T MAKE A FAT MAN CRY 30. IMPOTENT MEGALOMANIA 31. SUBMISSIVE POWER 32. TOYTOWN VOODOO 33. MONOGLOT 34. CALCULATED ELAN 35. I'M FIGHTING FOR THE CHILDREN 36. A USEFUL PILL TO PURGE OPTIMISM 37. LOSING YOU IS NOT A LOSS (AND KEEPING YOU IS NO SPECIFIC GAIN) 38. PRESIDENT PHILISTINE 39. HONK INCESSANTLY IF YOU HATE INCOME TAX 40. A ZOMBIE PROBABLY DOESN'T HAVE A SIREN 41. MY INSTINCT IS TO DO THE INDECISIVE THING BUT I'M NOT SURE EXACTLY WHAT THAT IS 42. SLEEPING WITH THREE EYES OPEN 43. MARX WITH HIS TONSILS REMOVED 44. POETS AND MONSTERS 45. THE ADVENTURES OF MR. FUCKINGHAM 46. 21ST CENTURY CLASS 47. ALL CAPS BRAND NAMES 48. RECIPE INGREDIENTS 49. EXPERIMENTAL REFLECTIONS 50. VIRTUOSO FAT BOY CRYING 51. SUPEREGO ON GUITAR, EGO ON DRUMS, ID ON BASS 52. AN INTELLECTUAL SLAUGHTERHOUSE 53. GET A LIE 54. OUTDATED ELEMENTS 55. CRAZY BUSINESS 56. FORGET TO VOTE 57. THIS IS A JOB FOR SPACE MAN 58. I & I: THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A RASTAFARIAN SCHIZOPHRENIC 59. ACCEPT NOTHING 60. THE MAN WHO FORGOT EVERYTHING AND NOTHING 61. I WANT TO WASTE MY TIME 62.BARON VON BARON VS. CAPTAIN BATMAN 63. PRESIDENT SMIRK 64. THE INTERNATIONAL SNOB 65. CONSPICUOUS PRESUMPTION 66. EXCUSE ME PLEASE GET OUT OF MY WAY 67. FIRST MOVER ADVANTAGE 68. THE STUPIDITY MACHINE 69. ENVIRONMENTAL ILLNESS 70. I JUST GET IT 71.HOW I RUINED EVERYTHING 72. I DARE YOU TO NEVER DIE 73. HOW TO BE GREAT 74. COMMERCIAL PEDANTRY 75. THE COWARD'S WAREHOUSE #16 1. DICTIONARY OF UNFAIRNESS or 2.OPTICAL ILLUSIONS LEAD CATTLE CALMLY TO THEIR DEATHS or 3. THE HOUR OF AN ACCUSTOMED DISENCHANTMENT 4. BLOTTO, THE THIRSTY GIANT 5. MANNA FOR DULL MINDS 6. LUSH PATROL 7. BROTHER, CAN YOU SPARE A BYTE? 8. THE VOCABULARY OF INTIMIDATION 9. THE DEVIL'S HATBAND 10. PLEASE DON'T STEP IN THE ART 11. ALL LIES 12. PRONOUNCED AS READ 13. THIS IS NOT A REVENUE GENERATING CONVERSATION 14. VERY IMPORTANT PEOPLE WHO AREN'T ME 15. TOO WEAK TO BE ANGRY 16. UNCOMFORTABLY NORMAL 17. FERAL EXPRESS 18. A PROSE THAT HAS NEVER BEEN WRITTEN 19. TRYING NOT TO SAVE THE WORLD 20. COMFORTABLE INJUSTICE 21. THE WEATHERED MIND 22. COMMEMORATING OUR DECEPTION 23. THE CALLIGRAPHY OF THE ABSURD 24. NOT VERY PROFOUND, BUT INFALLIBLE 25. THE TRAUMA SPECTRUM 26. A POETRY MACHINE 27. REMEMBER ME AS YOU SEE ME TOMORROW 28. STRANDED IN CONFUSIONLAND 29. SUPERDIRT 30. THE TOP OF MY HEAD 31. THERE'S BEEN A MISTAKE 32. THE ARTIST FORMERLY KNOWN AS THE ARTIST 33. THE UNIVERSITY OF DEATHIE 34. THE PRESENT ISN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE 35. THE WATER PROBLEM 36. I AM NOT AN ANARCHIST, I JUST DRESS LIKE ONE 37. PERFORMING MY OWN BIRTH 38.THE HAPPIEST TRILLIONAIRE 39. THE TWO MES 40. DYSFUNCTION JUNKIES 41. EXCITING NEW WORKS BY THE INCREASINGLY POPULAR CRAFTSMAN 42. THE FOOL'S TIDE 43. MOUNT ADLYMPUS 44. THE ROAD TO PALOOKAVILLE 45. HYPERPUISSANCE 46. THE AVATAR OF ULTRA MODERNITY 47. I LOVE ONE WORLD GOVERNMENT 48. THE REDUCTION PERIOD 49. GHASTLY SWEETMEATS 50. INDIFFERENCE STREET 51. THIS IS A "JOB" FOR IRONY MAN 52. DIGNIFIED SANITY 53. THE GREAT AMERICAN SCREENPLAY 54. THE HERO SHAPES DESTINY 55. SENTIMENTAL BEATIFICATION OF THE REBEL 56. NOT NOW, I'M BORED 57. A MITIGATING NIMBUS 58. CHTHONIC YOUTH 59. YOUNG DEVIL 60. COLD STUFF 61. NO SHOES, NO SHIRT, NO CREDIT 62. AMATEUR LIES 63. THE DAYS OF MYSTERY SEX ARE GONE 64. MUST...SAVE...PLANET...FIRST 65. HEALTHY, VACANT EYED CONFORMITY 66. NOT ONE OF MY BETTER IDEAS 67. THE REMAINS OF AN ATTITUDE 68. APOCATASTASIS 69. THE ANTITHESIS OF A TROUBLEMAKER 70. EDUCATED SLAVES 71. ABSCESS MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER 72. SORROWS OF THE UNCERTAIN SHORE 73. PAINTING OF THE VOICE 74. UTTER DEFEAT OF THE MURDERING TYRANT #17 1. ABANDON HOPE, ALL YE WHO HIT ‘ENTER' HERE or 2. THIS EITHER IS OR IS NOT A JOB FOR LOGIC MAN or 3. I AM NOT A GENIUS, I JUST PLAY ONE ON TV 4. THE SUFFERING SKY 5. A CREATURE OF HABITUS 6. THE UNIVERSITY OF KRYPTONITE 7. PATTERNS OF AESTHETIC PAYOFF 8. AN OPAQUE FORGERY OF A TRANSFIGURING WINDOW 9. THANK FRIDAY IT'S GOD 10. 100 TIP TOP POEMS 11.THE XYY MEN 12. MOBILIZATION FOR HAPPINESS 13. BLAIR CELTIC TREE WORSHIP PROJECT PART TWO 14. SERF COUNTRY 15. A CAT NAMED FRANKENSTEIN 16. THE SHAMAN'S ROLE 17. A LIBRARY OF HUMAN MUGGING 18. A REVOLUTIONARY SIMPLETON 19. SURF ZOMBIES: UNDEAD IN THE WATER 20. THE UNREFLECTING PASSIONS OF THE MULTITUDE 21. WONDERS CEASE 22. OUR COMMUNIST HERITAGE 23. THE ILLITERATE'S ENCYCLOPEDIA 24. 12 AGAINST ETERNO 25. RECKLESS REGARD 26. WOUNDS OF THE NEW ECONOMY 27. WILL NOT DO 28. UNDEDICATED AND STUPID 29. LAUGHABLY ANACHRONISTIC ADVICE 30. FANTASIES FOR THE CREDULOUS 31. WORLD CAPITAL OF SCHMALTZ 32. SOFT MUSH SPEWED OUT BY A WOOLY HEAD 33. IT'S A LAFF 34.THE COMPLETE CORRESPONDENCE 35. MY SPLIT PERSONALITY: A TWO MAN SHOW 36. CIA PET 37. MOTHERESE 38. SAINT OAF 39. YOU CALL IT GOING NEGATIVE I CALL IT COMPLETE HONESTY 40. SMALL BORE JEREMIAH 41. OUT AND DOWN 42. THE GUESSING HAND 43. BROMPTON'S COCKTAIL PARTY 44. SMASH MOUTH FOOTBALL 45. BIOGRAPHY OF THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER 46. BLOWHARD ARMY 47. THE ALBUM THAT'S MY BIBLE 48. TV KNOWS EVERYTHING 49. HARDMAN PRESS 50. GUN PEACE 51. THE COUNTRY OF THE FOUR NOS 52. PETER PEANUT LOVES YOU 53. TORY STORY 54. PRESIDENT WIG AND VICE PRESIDENT WITT 55. STAR TRACK 56. FALSE FACT AND TRUE FICTION 57. AT LEAST TWO OF EVERYTHING 58. I'M INNOCENT YOU BELIEVE ME, DON'T YOU? 59. A STANDARD LIE 60. AHAB'S COFFEE LOVING FIRST MATE 61. ERECTILE FUNCTION 62. CORPORATE REALITY 63. THE MAN IN THE IRONIC MASK 64. NAMASTE 65. ECO SCOUNDREL 66. GONE BARKING 67. THE PREMISE COPERS 68. DREAMING OF A LIFE FREE OF FAME 69. SINGLE JEOPARDY 70. EXCELLENT TOOL 71. GLAMOUR GRUDGES 72. HYPOTENUSE OF A VICIOUS TRIANGLE 73. CHIEF AND HIS WAR BAND 74. FUR PIMP #18 1.HUBRIS: THE PREQUEL or 2. STUPID BABY or 3. MR. SUCCESS 4. THE ANNIHILATING MOB 5. FORSAKING MY HEART'S EASE FOR A SOFT PARADE OF STRAW DOGS 6. TO BRIGHTON ONLY 7. FORGIVE YOUR ENEMIES BUT NOT YOUR FRIENDS 8. ELECTRIC CANDLES 9. CANDOR IS THE ONLY ACCEPTABLE GUILE 10. IMAGINE YOURSELF MORTALIZED 11. SHUT UP, SUPERMAN, SHUT UP 12. SPURNED AND JOYLESS FREAKS 13. JACKIE WATERTOWN 14. REBEL YELP 15. SEDITIOUS GESTURES OF NONCONFORMITY 16. MOLOCH'S HOUSE PROPAGANDA ORGAN 17. THE HARSH, ANTIQUE DICHOTOMY 18. DR. ERROR 19. FOREIGN HAND TIES 20. MY PUPPET WORSHIPS ME 21. THIS ISH A JOB FOR ALCOHOL MAN 22. THE WORK BUTCHER 23. DISREPUTABLE MILIEU 24. THESE WORDS AND THESE WORDS ALONE 25. DETECTIVE FACT 26. THE SMILEYS 27. LOTTERIES AND DRUGS 28. PROUD SLAVES 29. A QUIET ACCUMULATION OF TYRANNIES AND TRAUMAS 30. THE BLASPHEMOUS SOLECISMS OF THE FRIVOLOUS AND IRREVERENT 31. DR. ZEUS 32. THIS IS HAPPENING BY ANY CHANCE 33. FIT THOUGH FEW 34. CONSPICUOUS GRATITUDE 35. THE FANCY 36. CHRONICLE OF AN IMAGINARY YEAR 38. A PATHOLOGICAL LIFT 39. INEVITABLY 40. ESSENCE OF SNO CONE 41. MR. SLOW MOTION 42. HABITUS ATTACK 43. HI, HOMIE, I'M HUN! 44. SATURDAY NIGHT BEANS 45. POVERTY IS A FULL TIME JOB 46. MEATSPACE 47. THE WORLD KNOWLEDGE PROBLEM 48. COMMONSENSE RULES OF DAILY LIFE 49. THOUGHTFUL OUTSPOKENNESS 50. A CONCOURSE OF GHOULS 51. FLUBS AND BLUNDERS 52. TINCTURE OUR AGE 53. HARD COUNT 54. WORK WITH INTERRUPTIONS 55. THE FACTORIES OF THE CONTENT BARONS 56. ALL MY FRIENDS WEAR THEIR FACES ON THEIR HEADS 57. PURE WISHFUL THINKING 58. QUIVERING WITH THE PROMISE OF SOFT ADVENTURE TO COME 59. LET A SIMILE BE YOUR UMBRELLA 60. TRIUMPH OF THE TRASH IMPERATIVE 61. THE SILENT CLONES 62. NOW A MINOR MOTION PICTURE 63. EVERYBODY LOVES SUNSHINE 64. AVENGE THE SLAIN MASTER 65. THE FALSE WINDOW 66. BRAVE INVERTEBRATE 67. THE GOD MOLECULE 68. DREAM LOGIC 69. CONSPICUOUSLY HIP 70. THE OUTER SUBURBS OF THE INNER CITY 71. I PINNED MY CONSCIENCE TO THE MAT 72. NEVER LET IT BE SAID 73. NEW GOSSIP FOR YOUR WAGGING TONGUES 74. PUBLISH AND PERISH 75. THE TUNNEL AT THE END OF THE LIGHT #19 1. BUT FIRST...THIS or 2. A DREAM! A HOAX! AN IMAGINARY STORY! or 3. EARTH TO LAUGHING BOY 4. THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE WORLD 5. OG WEST: CAVEMAN COWBOY PRIVATE EYE 6. WHAT ABOUT THOSE BIBLE WINES? 7. THE CRACKS I FELL BETWEEN 8. EXPANDING THE NEWSHOLE 9. A CORKING YARN 10. THE IDEOLOGY OF A MYTH 11. THE KNOWLEDGE 12. AN EXCESS OF REASON 13. YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SALIENT 14. RENAISSANCE WRECK 15. RESEGREGATION 16. GRACELESS UNDER NO PRESSURE 17. UNRELIABLE DEJA VU 18. NEGATRON 19. WHATTAGE 20. BUY MORE STUFF 21. PUPPIES ‘N' KITTENS 22. VICTIM MODE 23. ALL FIREWORKS 24. THE WHELPING BOX 25. CURIOUS KONG 26. THIS IS ALREADY A JOB FOR SUPER IMPULSIVE MAN 27. FIDGETY FIDGETY FUM 28. A CELL TO MAKE MECHANISMS TRANSPARENT 29. THE GAGONY AND THE YUKSTACY 30. UNFORMATION 31. FOSSILIZED IRRELEVANCE 32. LOVE THAT MANNIKIN! 33. APOSTLE OF GREED 34. TILL HELL WOULDN'T HAVE IT 35. I READ WITH GREAT UNINTEREST 36. THE BOOK OF RICH DISASTERS 37. GUIDED SERENDIPITY 38. PLATEAU OF CONTENTMENT 39. SLUMMERVILLE 40. STUPOR MONDAY 41. EXPOSITION 42. THIS IS NOT WRONG 43. A LOOK OF SAINTLY PATIENCE 44. UNFINISHED MASTERPIECE 45. PAPERY SOCIETY 46. YESTERDAY IS HERE 47. INFORMATION MAUSOLEUM 48. NEGATIVE SELECTION 49. DISASTROUSLY RIGHT 50. THE QUIET FELLOWSHIP OF THE FALLEN 51. A BETTER SENSE OF HUMOR 52. THE EXPERTS WERE SPECTACULARLY RIGHT 53. CELEBRITY UNWILLING 54. GONE WITH THE MIND 55. YOU ARE MY AUDIENCE 56. VILLAIN KILLED IN THE FIRST 20 MINUTES NO, WAIT! HE'S NOT REALLY DEAD! 57. BOOKS NEVER WRITTEN AT ALL BECAUSE OF THE DRINKING 58. THESE FACTS ARE MY EXCLUSIVE PROPERTY 59. FOR THE CHILDREN 60. CLASSICAL NAMES ARE BORING 61. IT AIN'T GRAND 62. THIS IS A JOB FOR ULCER MAN BUT FIRST, A GLASS OF MILK 63. SUPER MONEY 64. WHAT ABOUT THE RIGHTS OF THE CRIMINAL? 65. ROSWELL'S BOSWELL 66. THE CHILD WHO HATED TOYS 67. VESTIGIAL SENSE OF PROPORTION 68. GHASTLY IMBECILITIES 69. THE STORY OF THE CHIMP IN AMERICAN LITERATURE 70. ESTABLISHMENT PARANOIA 71. DISGUISED AS TRADITION 72. RAT ASSED DRUNK 73. THE NECESSARY APPEARANCE OF EFFORTLESSNESS 74. POST INTERESTING 75. WHAT MAKES ME LOVE MY COUNTRY SO MUCH #20 1.THIS IS HOW IT'S ALL GOING TO START OR 2. ASDFG SEMI LKJH OR 3. THE ENTABLATURE BETWEEN THE ARCHITRAVE AND THE CORNICE OR 4. PARAMETERS OF THE AMBIGUOUS 5. SOVERSHENNO SEKRETNO 6. NO FAR NO GOOD 7. EXPLODING THE TERMS 8. HEPATITUS ANDRONICUS 9. UNIVERSITY OF COLLEGE 10. LAST AND LEASTMOST 11. AND OR NOT 12. HETEROGENOUS NONSENSE DISTRIBUTOR 13. STORY AS MACHINE 14. FATHER, MOTHER, JUDGE, JURY, EXECUTIONER 15. ROGUE'S THESAURUS 16. UNCLE MADMAN 17. THE FORGETTABLE FIRE 18. CROSS EXAMINE THIS, YOU BARRACUDA 19. THE BLANK NOTE 20. MISJUDGMENT DAY 21. THE SIMILARITY ENGINE 22. THE NECESSARIES OF LIFE 23. RAG WRAPPED AREAWAY SLUMBERS 24. I COULD BE LIKE JESUS 25. FATHER KNOWS PEST 26. CUIDADO 27. I AM AN AMERICAN 28. BLOWTOWN 29. BUZZ MAN 30. VENOM MACHINE 31. HOT DIGGETY DOG ZIGGETY BOOM 32. MARKETING RACKETEERS 33. COMPASSIONATE MACHINEGUN 34. B.S. I LOVE YOU 35. THE MCDONALD'S OF SPERM 36. PORTABLE PUP 37. YOU IS THE NEW ME 38. CULTURAL CARTOONING 39. HISTORY MAN 40. ABSENT MINDED FRANKENSTEIN 41. A RISKY SCHEME 42. PASTOPOLIS 43. PUTTING BACK THE FOURTH WALL 44. REFORM THE ELITES 45. CIRCUS BEES 46. CESSPOOLS OF HATE 47. POMPOUS AWKWARDNESS 48. DUTY TO CONSUME 49. A WONDERFUL MANDARIN 50. CELEBRITY FATIGUE 51. A WASTE OF WHITE THORN 52. TRANSFIXED WITH THE SHEER HORROR OF IT ALL 53. PROTOTYPE BIOGRAPHY 54. BEASTLY ON A REALLY HEROIC SCALE 55. NINE ARE MY LIVES 56. ALL CLASS IS STYLE 57. THE STORY OF ALL THE PEOPLE I EVER MET 58. HE KEPT US OUT OF WAX 59. VICARIOUS UBIQUITY 60. DISCLOSURE: I AM DEAD 61. I SEE I SEE NO I SEE NO EVIL 62. DIMPLED WORDPLAY 63. THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF LIES 64. I LIKE THE WAY YOU DIE 65. STONE AGE MYSTERY NOVEL 66. IRREPLACEABLE JUNK 67. THE JOKE ANSWER TO EVERY CRISIS 68. SWIMMING IS LIKE FLYING 69. THE BASIC IDEA 70. DOT COMPANEROS 71. HARDWIRED TO STIGMATIZE TRIBES 72. THE BUSINESS OF AMERICA IS B.S. 73. CYBOTAGE 74. PLAYING THE LEVELING FIELD 75. ONE HUNDRED IMMORTAL POEMS DUMBED DOWN FOR TODAY'S KIDS #21 1. CHAT DRINK MOVIE CHAT FUN LOVE or 2. THE SELECTIVE IMAGINATION or 3. MY MISTAKE 4. I ‘M SO BAD AT FIGHTING I CAN'T EVEN BEAT UP ON MYSELF 5. NEW VICTIM FOR 24/7 6. THE ADVENTURES OF FATS AND SWEETS 7. A MARRIAGE MADE IN HEAVEN AND LIVED IN HELL 8. COMMUNIST GOTHIC 9. UNIVERSITY OF VEAL 10. ATROCIOUS HARMLESSNESS 11. THE MAGNIFICENCE OF THE DULL 12. TABLEAUX VIVANTS 13. STOCKMARKETCRASH.COM 14. ART IMITATES ME 15. THE COMPOSITE PRESIDENT 16. WISDOM MAN 17. 5,000 DIFFICULT PAYMENTS OF ONE CENT EACH 18. WHEN 19. ASTONISHING REVELATION 20. GATEWAY WORDS 21. THE DREAM CORRESPONDENCE OF GHOSTS 22. AD CREEP 23. A NEUROTYPICAL DAY 24. DATA MISCHIEF 25. DIVINITY BULLETINS 26. WOOD EYE 27. JUST WHAT I WANT YOU TO THINK 28. THE TRUTH COMES BACK TO HAUNT YOU 29. ALL TREES ARE UGLY 30. THANK YOU FOR THINKING THAT THIS LIST IS HILARIOUS 31. FUN WEBSITES THAT RELATE DIRECTLY TO YOUR LIFE 32. AWARD WINNING GENRE NOVEL 33. BIZARRO QUEST 34. M'KAY 35. A DYING MAN'S WISDOM 36. A POACHER TURNED GAMEKEEPER 37. BECAUSE I'M A DOCTOR I WON'T HIT YOU 38. THE TERRIFYING WASTELAND BETWEEN INNOCENCE AND HYSTERIA 39. A HIGHLY MANNERED WORK OF FACT 40. UPSTICK ASSWARDS 41. QUICK WITH THE CATEGORIES 42. JUDAS ISCARIOT, ATTORNEY AT LAW 43. ACID ENHANCED SCRAMBLEVISION 44. REVERSE PLAGIARISM 45. A FALLING OFF 46. THE ARCHITECTURES OF CONTROL 47. BLUE NOVEL 48. ONLINE BOZO FILTER 49. VEAL CHIPS 50. INSIDE OF EVERY WOMAN THERE'S A FAT MAN STRUGGLING TO GET OUT ME 51. OHIOWASH 52. EDU.COM 53. UNTITLED DOCUMENT 54. CELEBRITIES ARE THE ONLY INTERESTING PEOPLE 55. REAL SPACE CODE 56. MEAT MAIL 57. BAD FRIDAY 58. A VIOLATION OF MY PUBLICITY 59. WAKE UP AND DIE 60. BISCUIT CITY 61. MY FRIEND JAR JAR 62. FIRE IN THE ETHER 63. FAKE EVIL 64. DESIGNER PROTEST 65. OVERT POVERTY 66. TURN YOUR QUESTIONS INTO STATEMENTS 67. DIE AND LET DIE 68. SMIRKING CONSUMER BRAGGART 69. SUPERANNUATED RETAINERS 70. UNIVERSITY OF THE HOMELESS 71. SEXY PROPELLER HEAD 72. MY DISREGARD OF DANGER HAS MADE MILLIONS GASP 73. TREASON.GOV 74. DEFAULT: VEAL 75. CLUMSY ME #22 1.DESIGNER GIBBERISH or 2.STOP READING THIS BECAUSE I AM A NUT or 3. A POOR OBSERVATION BRILLIANTLY PHRASED 4. A GOOD DEAL OUT OF IT 5.STOJ! PATRZ! SLUCHAJ! 6. QUICK! BEHIND YOU! 7. PLATO O PLOMO 8.LIQUID ARCHITECTURE 9.THEY ONLY LOVE ME FOR MY MIND 10.ALL LIBERALS ARE STUPID AND ALL CONSERVATIVES ARE FAT 11.MACHINES VS. ROBOTS 12.COMPUTERMAN 13.NO FIRE! NO FIRE! 14.WRY CHUCKLES AND INFORMED MORAL OUTRAGE 15.CONDESCENSION IN ALL ITS COMIC AND TRAGIC VARIETIES 16. COLLECTED RANTS PART LXVIII 17.COZY MYSTERIES 18.UNIVERSITY OF MASTER SLAVE 19.SUPERNIETZSCHE 20.THE BOY WHO CRIED CHIHUAHUA 21.NATIONAL BUM CENTER 22. PRUDES WON'T THINK IT'S FUNNY 23. THE OUTSIDE DOPE 24.SWEARING OUT 25.SANCTIMONIOUS HORSESHIT 26. THIS MIGHT BE A JOB FOR SECURITY MAN WHO WANTS TO KNOW? 27. MESMER HIGH 28. DEFINITIONS DRIVE THE PLOT 29. THE BORING SONG 30. A WORLD WITHOUT SHAKESPEARE 31. THE ANTICS OF THE VERY POOR 32.THIS MUST BE A MISTAKE! THE PRICES ARE SO LOW! 33. MORE LIES 34. BIG CATS WITH AN INSATIABLE CRAVING FOR MEAT 35.ARROGANT HUMILITY 36.I & I BEFORE E & E 37. CRISP DOTARD VISION 38. YOU LOOK LIKE YOU HAVE AN HONEST FACE, EVEN THOUGH YOU DON'T 39. A DAB HAND 40.WELL CHUFFED 41. THOUGHT LEADERS 42. NUTTY ENTERPRISES 43. NO, I'M NOT KIDDING 44. SLENDER PIG 45. A CHEAP DYAD JOB 46. LIFE IS UNFAIR BUT SO AM I 47. THE PLOT THINS 48. I HAVE EVERYTHING TO HIDE 49. PIGEONHOLE ME 50. INNOCENCE IS NO EXCUSE 51. COMPUTER VIOLENCE 52. YOU HAVE PLAYED RIGHT INTO MY HANDS 53. BEFORE THE THRESHOLD 54. FUTURE HITS 55. HOT BYTES 56.THE MUZAK MACHINE 57. UNSOUND OPINIONS 58. CALL IT ART 59. ELECTRONIC SOUND FACTORY 60. SPECIAL MASTERS 61. ILLUMINATED OBSCURITIES 62. DARK ON LIGHT PLACES 63. I BEGGED FOR A STONE BUT THEY GAVE ME BREAD 64. ALTERNATIVE ELSEWHERE 65. COMPRESSED REALITY MEDIA 66. MODERN CHOICES 67. FORGETTABLE RESONANCE 68. SIGNAL TO NOISE 69. THE SOUND AND THE FURRY 70. STYLE AND SUBSTANCE 71. UNEDITED OPINIONS 72. BUT READ THIS OFFER FOR AN EVEN BETTER DEAL! 73. MORE TO COME 74.AUTOMATIC SOUNDS 75.I'M SO SORRY BUT WE DO HAVE TO END IT HERE #23 1.IT'S ALL FOR THE ATTENTION or 2. HAVE FUN WITH BUBBLES AND GET SHINY CLEAN or 3. THE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN KNIFE, SERGEANT FORK AND ADMIRAL SPOON or 4. YUMM! THIS IS A JOB FOR ALL YOU CAN EAT BUFFET MAN! 5. PUTIN ON THE FRITZ 6. SMUG SKEPTICISM 7. A WILD IMPERTINENCE 8. RESCUE FANTASY ISLAND 9. FRANKENSTEIN, P.I. 10. THRILLINGLY CORRUPT AND PERVERSELY BEAUTIFUL 11. A CONVERSATION CONDUCTED ENTIRELY IN TABLOIDESE 12. THE DRUNKEN FLAG 13. GO, SIMBA, GO! 14. SCIENCE IS AS SCIENCE DOES 15. NORTH CARRION ROAD 16. DRUGS I NEVER DID 17. SHAKESPEARE U. 18. PLAYS THE GREATEST HITS OF ALL TIME 19. A PATH LESS WORN 20. SLOW AND SEEDY 21. INSANE CRUSADE 22. I WAS PRAYIN' FOR YOU SISTER GIRL, LORD EMANUEL! 23. A QUESTIONABLE COCKTAIL 24. MADE FOR MOVIE TV 25. TH' FORTRESS O' FUN 26. EMPATHY SUIT 27. A BRIEF CAREER OF CRAZY HOOLIGANISM 28. TICKERTAPEWORMS 29. THE ACHE OF A CURSING HEART 30. THE FRAUDULENT FANDANGO 31. THE ROTS OF ROOK 32. A FAN'S ENTHUSIASM 33. THE EXECUTIONER'S SNOG 34. IT'S SOUVENIRS WE WANTS 35. VICIOUS DILLENTANTES 36. THEODORE THE SNOBBY BEAR 37. ETYMOLOGY UNKNOWN 38. INVESTMENT BANKRUPT 39. THE OPPOSITE OF IRONY 40. DECLINE MANAGEMENT 41. SAVAGE CAMP 42. PLASTIC GRASS 43. 1% APPROVAL RATINGS AMONG SATANISTS 44. THE POWER OF A LAUGHING FACE 45. SIMILARITIES BETWEEN ME AND MY HERO 46. MILITANT NOSTALGIA 47. AGITATED VILLAGE 48. GOOD VILLAINS WHO WANT TO TAKE OVER HEAVEN 49. A TEEMING MASS OF ROBOTS 50. A REFRIED ZEITGEIST 51. MR. LADY 52. THE THING FROM UTOPIA 53. A NORTHERN CHILDHOOD 54. CRUNCHY LITTLE SUPERMAN 55. EPICENE TARTNESS 56. SHARP AS THE DEVIL'S TAIL 57. GOOD OLD POUNDS AND OUNCES 58. WARGOOD PEACEBAD 59. THIS MAY BE A JOB FOR MERCILESS MAN BUT FIRST I NEED YOUR MONEY 60. TRAGIC HERO BABY 61. MIDAS TOOL 62, CRUDE ERUDITION 63. PRESIDENT LIAR 64. DOWN TO THE FINAL FOUR 65. HOME AIN'T HERE 66. PROGRAMMATIC BLACKGUARDING 67. CURIOUS KONG 68.THE WIZARD OF OZ: THE PREQUEL 69. NO, WAIT ACTUALLY, THAT IS FUNNY 70. ENTRANCE OF MALICE 71. CHIMP IS DEAD 72. COLLECTED SUICIDE NOTES 73. COERCIVE PIETISM 74.MUSHROOM UMBRELLA 75. WRITTEN OUT IN FULL POMP #24 1.THE YEAR THAT WAS NOT VERY EVENTFUL or 2. A SOCIALIST CHRISTMAS or 3. SOUL SANTA or 4. FEATHERTOP VS. FROSTY 5. SANTA DOG 6. A VISIT FROM THE JESUS MAN 7. BUY TOYS OR THE FAT MAN DIES 8. AQUISTADORE 9. NOT CHEAP ENOUGH AT ANY PRICE 10. SUPERFICIALITY, SELFISHNESS, AND SUCKING UP 11. SAINT DOG 12. BIBLE BASED BLASPHEMY 13. A PERMANENT CHRISTMAS 14. DOLL CANNOT STAND ALONE 15. THE TRAGIC TEN DOLLAR BILL 16. PLANET OF THE CHEAP KNOCK OFFS 17. YHWH WAS HIS NAME O 18. LOCKSTEP PROMOTIONAL MACHINE 19. SANTA REX 20, PARTAKE SPARINGLY OF CHICKEN THAT MIGHT BE FISH 21. FATEMASTER SOULCAPTAIN 22. LOUD, RED AND OBNOXIOUS 23. THE NEW NEW PAST 24. A MEDICI OF SOLIPSISM 25. BROCCOLI TV 26. BEHAVIORAL SENTINEL EVENTS 27. IN THE MAIN 28. A B &C 29. LIGHT, MOTION, WORDS 30. THE COMPLETE 31. GHOSTLY HOLOGRAM 32. 13X,16X,40X 33. SUDDENLY ANOTHER VOICE IS HEARD 34. HEY! DROP THAT ROLL OF TAR PAPER! 35. UNIVERSITY OF CUTE 36. METASTASIZING MANDARIN 37. TRAVEL MYSTERY 38. GENETIC BEAR 39. A PONDEROUS TOUR DE FORCE 40. PINNACLED DIM IN THE INTENSE INANE 41. FEAR BASED AMORAL COMPASS 42. A PHONY LITTLE FAKE 43. FEAR GOD, TELL THE TRUTH AND MAKE MONEY 44. GET ME WRONG 45. MR. DUTCH AND THE CRAZYMEN 46. WHO UNDUN IT 47. 46 BETRAYALS 48. 4TH BILLED TO A PARAMECIUM 49. THE NARCISSISTIC ARSENAL OF ROCK AND ROLL 50. FABULOUS LIES 51.CYBER GHETTO 52. HAPPY ROTTER AND THE DERIVATIVE FANTASY CRAZE 53. SOUR SAGE 54. AUTISTO THE CLOWN 55. ASK ME ABOUT MY SUGAR GLIDER 56. OTHELLO OF VENICE 57. PRY.COM 58. GOBBETS OF NEWS 59. TEEN PROTAGONIST 60. AN ARTIST IN EVIL 61. ENCYCLOPEDIA BROWN AND THE CASE OF THE NOSTALGIC BOOMER 62. A CUTE GRIEF 63. PUBLICITY WHORE 64. ARTIFICIAL CHARM 65. A CLAN OF STOLID ZOMBIES 66. MY LITTLE NOVEL 67. FICTITIOUS EXTRACTS 68. I SHALL BE DEAD IN MAY 69. MASS DEMOTIC 70. BLOOD AND TIME 71. NEW VISTAS FOR THE INSIPID 72. PROFOUND NOISE 73. DEGENERATE POP 74. EXPLODED AND HARDENED INTO DOGMA 75. A SITUATIONIST CHRISTMAS #25 1. SONY THOUGHTMAN or 2. DATA FURNACE or 3. WHITE PLAGUE or 4. AN ELECTRONIC BEACH 5. SAXON 60 LATIN 40 6. INTELLECTUAL SUICIDE 7. NUTSCAPE NAVIGATOR 8. PLUSH SAFE HE THINK 9. TAR WAX 10. TRUCULENT PIETY 11. A LITTLE BIT OF WHAT THEY FANCY DOES THEM GOOD 12. THESAURUS OF HOGWASH 13. LOVES THE JOBS YOU HATE 14. JAZZ WOODBINES 15. GOLD'S DISCIPLINE 16. HERBAL SOLACE 17. DIES IST WERK FUR SUPERHITLER 18. MR. FRESH 19. JIMINY SUPEREGO! 20. I MET MY WIFE AT P4W 21. SHRIMP WAR 22. WHERE'S MY NAME? 23. THE LAUGHING GENOME 24. IDIOT.COM 25. CALL ME MR. PROUDSHY 26. SMILING DEMAGOGUE 27. VOODOO PARK 28. SAUCE FOR THE GAUNT 29. SINGING WITH 100 VOICES 30. WOLF SOLVENT 31. KING SANDWICH 32. THE FORMULA IS THIS 33. BOOBOO THE GHOSTLY DETECTIVE 34. THE OMERTA FACTORY 35. SUBSTITUTE MORAL FIGUREHEAD 36. THE WORLD IS IN THE WAY 37. WARNIK 38. REAL MEN DON'T DO NICHE 39. D D D D DARLIN 40. NO FIND, NO FEE 41. THE GLIB THEATRE 42. A BRIEF HAGIOGRAPHY 43. PEACHES MAKE ME FAT 44. AN ENTIRE COHORT OF TURNCOATS 45. CROOKED FACE 46. THE MERCHANT OF VENOM 47. READ MY NEW BOOK ABOUT MY CHRONIC ILLNESS 48. NEIGHBORHOOD 101 49. I CROW EXCITEDLY 50. MUDSLINGING BOOTLICKER 51. A STRAW MAN THAT'S EASY TO DEMOLISH 52. YOU WOULD KNOW IT TO LOOK AT ME 53. EVERY TIME YOU SEE ME I'M NOT HERE 54. PASSWORD ALREADY IN USE 55. SECOND HAND CHILDISH BANALITIES 56. POP LIFE 57. I HATE MY RIVAL 58. COMMON PURPOSE WITHIN OUR REACH 59. OTHER PEOPLE'S PROBLEMS 60. ASYLUM IN A HOSTILE LAND 61. POINTLESS ANECDOTES 62. SOFT FOCUS AYATOLLAHS 63. PARODIES ENOW 64. PATHOS BILL 65. A GAP LIFE 66. SUBJECT FIELD IDIOT 67. 13 PLANET EARTHS 68. JUST NOT 69. AN INSISTENT OSTINADO OF GREED AND POWER 70. COMFORTING ALLEGATIONS 71. HATE TRICK 72. ANTI DAVID COPPERFIELD 73. NO, ACTUALLY, THIS IS A JOB FOR SUPERKYPTONITE 74. A WHITE COMFORT 75. SHOUTING INTO A VOID #26 1. RELUCTANT ICONOCLAST or 2. SAXON GO LATIN or 3. DRUNK NOIR or 4. VAPID FIRE 5. POWER POWER 6. WHY ANYBODY DOES ANYTHING 7. GENERAL CHAOS AND CORPORAL PUNISHMENT 8. A PORTABLE, INFALLIBLE ARTIFICIAL MEMORY 9. MR. DIRT 10. DISTURBANCE ECOLOGY 11. SWEETS, CRISPS, AND FIZZY DRINKS 12. SELF PRESCRIBED CASH THERAPY 13. STREET CRED 14. WUTLESS 15. THE GLEAM OF BIG BUCKS 16. THE CATEGORY OF EXPECTATIONS TO BE RUPTURED 17. COLONEL COLUMBUS 18. THE GRAFFITI BOYS 19. WHAT'S IT TO YOU, LARD? 20. TOXIC DESSERT 21. 07734 1776 90210 22. SHUT UP,

dimenno	Feb 22 2011, 10:29 PM Post #2311
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	#26 22. SHUT UP, YOU 23. A ONE MAN UNDERGROUND 24. IN THE PRESENCE OF SOME STALACTITES FROM DAYS GONE BY 25. THE KIND OF GIMMICKY TRASH WHICH IS CURRENTLY VERY POPULAR 26. MEAT THE FAMILY 27. AND THE BEATLES HATE ALONZO TUSKE 28. A GRANDSTANDING RUNT 29. ZOO MAN 30. THE ADVENTURES OF DOG AND CAT 31. WORLD'S GREATEST DRUNK 32. KLEPTOCRATIC SHELL STATES AND MURDEROUS WARLORDS 33. ZPRAVSTVUI! 34. DIE, MEDIA ROBOTS, DIE 35. GUIDES TO ACTUAL USAGE 36. OPAQUE FOLLY 37. MT. PEASANT 38. POTENT FORGIVENESS REALITIES 39. UNREAD BY THE AUTHOR 40. THE BEST WILL IN THE WORLD 41. TECHNOCYBER 42. USELESS HEIGHTS 43. SMALL MINDS OF THE WESTERN ANTI INTELLECTUAL TRADITION TAUGHT BY TWELVE COLLEGE DROPOUTS 44. AS MELHORES PIADAS 45. SIECLE CLOWNS 46. THE SHARED CAMARADERIE OF THE DISENFRANCHISED 47. SUPERCLOWN 48. BINGO HAS BEEN CALLED HOLD YOUR MARKERS PLEASE 49. WE ALL END UP WITH OUR TRUE LOVE 50. THE IRONY PILL 51. A LIFE LED ASTRAY BY ART 52. KING GOD 53. UNVARYING STODGE AND FIZZ 54. THE RIGHT SPLIFF 55. BOLD CAPTAIN BOLD 56. A CERTAIN SMALL COLLECTION OF THE SMALLEST FACTS 57. LOW GRADE INSIGHTS 58. DEFAMATORY METAPHORS 59. INFINITE CHAGRIN 60. IRONICTOWN 61. EXPLETIVES RESTORED 62. LAUGH IT UP, FURBALL 63. MIASTO, MASA, MASZYNA 64. FOR THE LITTLE ONES 65. GIRAFFES ON HORSEBACK SALAD 66. FUNNY THE MAGIC CLOWN 67. ROCKET HOBO 68. STALIN MAN 69. LORD MANIA 70. INFIDEL LITERATURE 71. MR. OBJECT 72. THE ARTIFICIAL CELEBRITY 73. MISTAKEN TRUTH, SUCCESSFUL LIES 74.THE OTHER SIDE OF THE SUN 75. NO CHANGE UNLESS YOU BUY SOMETHING #27 1. NOW THIS or 2. MORE NEW or 3. JUST DOGS or 4. SOUL VIRUSES 5.INTOXICATED ANDROID 6.ALL THE MONSTER NATIONS 7.MATTER AND WATER 8. A BRIEF CAREER OF CRAZY HOOLIGANISM 9. THE OLD AND THE RESTED 10. CHARISMA FATIGUE 11. THE HERO MACHINE 12. AUTOHAGIOGRAPHY 13. VOLO INTELLIGERE 14. A FOOL'S REWARD 15. I'VE GOT ONE! 16. GOOD OLD ME 17. THE IRRESISTIBLE FRIEND 18. MUST...TRY...HARDER... 19. EPICS OF THE COUNTRY 20. HELP AN HONEST MAN 21. A VIRTUOUS CIRCLE 22. AS YOU WIN, YOU LOSE 23. SPRING BACK, FALL FORWARD 24. NATIONAL BESTSELLER 25. DOT DOT DOT 26. MUST...WRITE...NOVEL... 27. (THE HOT POTATO OF) WOWLESSNESS 28. LOGICAL ATOM BOMB 29. MY ORIGINAL FANCY 30. CHINESE HITLER 31. EVERYBODY'S MAGIC NOW 32. GET TECHNICAL 33. SENSIBLE MISTRUSTS 34. TALKING HOTHEADS 35. SILICON COCKROACHES 36. A NEW WAY TO BE MAD 37. A TOUCH OF ALTRUISM 38. SONGS OF CONTROVERSY 39. THIS MUCH IS CERTAIN 40. OPAQUE FOGY VISION 41. A BABY PATTER OF AWE 42. CONFABULATIONS 43. FUTURELESS 44. FOR EMERGENCY PURPOSES 45. OUR SHORT NATIONAL DAYDREAM IS OVER 46. THE LIBRARY OF COURAGE 47. ORDINARY JOYS 48. MUNDANE AWE 49. CAME HASTING ALONG 50. THE PERMITTED CITY 51. BIG MAMMALIAN CANDIDATES 52. SLOB ICE 53. INSTANT NEMESIS 54. CAPTAIN JESUS 55. PENFORT STREET 56. A WILD EXACTITUDE 57. FOOLISH ARGUS 58. SAVING FACE AND PUTTING ON AIRS 59. THE RAINBOW MAN IS COMING TO TOWN 60. DEMONSTRATION AGAINST RUST 62. EXPONENTIAL ORWELL 63. THE CABINET OF SUPERMAN 64. HUMOROUS LITERALISM 65. THE GOD PLAYS 66. LAND OF THE MEDIA GIANTS 67. WORSE STILL 68. REPRESENTING A REALITY I WISH TO DESTROY 69. SACKING CHAMPION 70. FRESH COMBINATIONS 71. BAD TWEED 72. YARNING 73. MOUNT OF ANGER 74. PICKUP TRUCKS, DEER HUNTING, BAREFOOT GIRLS AND BOILED PEANUTS 75. SCISSORS, ROCK, PAPER, GUN #28 1. THE VAST MIDDLE GROUND BETWEEN BUFFOONERY AND CANT 2. DISGRACE UNDER PRESSURE 3. SOMEONE FAMOUS 4. FASHIONISTAS 5. HAMSTER OF THE GODS 6. INSTANT FUN 7. EMERGENCY HUMOR 8.PAST CONTROVERSIES ARE ALWAYS QUAINT 9. TOXIC SCHLOCK 10. TIGHTER CIRCLES 11. JUNKIES ARE SO 20TH CENTURY 12. IN SYNC WITH THE OUT CROWD 13. FUSSY LOGIC 14. WINDOWS 1900 15. QUANTUM UNENTANGLEMENT 16. LAST ACCESSED DATE TODAY (DUH!) 17. INSTANT AQUA: JUST ADD WATER 18. SCALES TO WEIGH SOULS 19. GLOCAL 20. WELCOME TO MY SELFPLEX 21. VARIATIONS ON WORD ORDER 22. GOD IS A LARGE SCALE QUANTUM EFFECT 23. LIFE IS BUT A GENE 24. ENDING AMERICA 25. IT PAYS TO BE RICH 26. CENTRAL RAZZLE 27. MAPS, RECIPES AND RECORDINGS 28. THE PUNISHMENT BUTTON 29. DNA LIQUORS 30. THE LAUGHING GORILLA 31. THE DRUG TREE 32. ANONYMOUS RADIO 33. SHOUTING BOOKS 34. INSTANT DESPAIR 35. TUNA FREE DOLPHIN 36. ABANDON HOP ALL YE WHO ENTER 37. YOUR CHEERY WEE PAL 38. HUMAN HERD MANAGEMENT 39. BRAIN GARBAGE 40. WHO'S A PRETTY BIRD? 41.RESPONSIBLE CODSWALLOP 42. THE BLACK HOLE ATE MY HOMEWORK 43. ANTI ENERGY 44. MORPHIC FIELDS 45. THE RECOGNITION HUERISTIC 46. DR. SLAUGHTER AND MR. CURE 47. EXCITED DELERIUM 48. NOMINATIVE CHAOS 49. AN OBSTINATE ILLUSION 50. SPACE SYNTAX 51. RATS FIND THEIR REWARD 52. SNOW LANDING ON WATER 53. GOLD! HA HA! GOLD! GOLD! 54. MIDNIGHT SLIM 55. HAVING FUN WITH JESUS ON STAGE 56. PLENTY OF ROOM FOR FAILURE 57. BITTER WARMTH AND BALMY COLD 58. SIMPLE EXPLANATION: I LIED 59. NIL POISON NATURE 60. IT'S A JUNGLE IN HERE 61. GENE POO 62. TEENAGE PREGNANCY PROJECT 63. THE ANGRY MOLECULE 64. STUPID AND WORTHLESS 65. GEEK SALAD 66. INTELLECTUALS, HOORAYS AND MONEY MEN 67. THE WORD VANDALISM IS NOT IN MY DICTIONARY: I TORE IT OUT 68. SOMETHING ADDS UP 69. MR. BOSS 70. REACTIVE ATTACHMENT ORDER 71. FRAGILE X 72. UNINTELLIVISION 73. I'M A MUSHROOM 74. INFINITE SOYBEAN VARIATIONS 75. MICROFOSSIL #29 1.IT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING BABY, IT'S WHERE IT'S AT DADDY or 2. THIS IS AN ANSWER? or 3. CLOCK OF THE LONG NOW 4. INFOMEDIA 5. IN VIVID REVERSE 6. WITHOUT DRUMS OR TRUMPETS 7. BIZARRE DINOSAURS 8. TWO HORSES WITH THE SAME OWNER 9. BUYING IDENTITY 10. LOW BATT... 11. DEATH, NATURE, RELIGION, LOVE AND TIME 12. PSYCHOTIC FRAUD 13. GOD OF THE GAPS 14. INVIGILATION 15. THE WONDERFUL AROMA OF FRESH BAKED GOODIES 16. CADAVER DOGS 17. ONE SIDED PAPER 18. THE UNDERWHELMING MINORITY 19. THE MONTH OF THE YEAR 20. ANGRY HAIR 21. RAMADAN DING DONG 22. CLOWNS FOR THE WORLD 23. TRUMPET VALVES GLEAMING IN THE HANDS OF GENIUSES 24. BIOGRAFIENDS 25. TEN COMMANDMENTS, THAT'S A LOT 26. NOVELLE FATTE A MACHINA 27. MY LOVE POEM IS BETTER THAN YOURS 28. THE SECRET GENT 29. CRIMINALS I MET WHILE HITCHIKING ON USA HIGHWAYS 30. DEAR MR. TIN 31. SLUT MACHINES 32. IL LIBRO DEGLI ERRORI 33. 4891 by LLEWRO EGROEG 34. AND YOU SHOW IT HOW? 35. VIRTUAL ABSOLUTION 36. SOJOURNOR LIE 37. GIGANTOMACHY 38. THE SHAMELESS SUCCEED 39. WHATEVER IT IS I DON'T HAVE IT 40. LA LENTE ROUTE BOSKIEN 41. 24 OUT OF 24 42. YOUR EYESORE HERE 43. INCANDESCENT MOONSHINE 44. MANDATORY OFFICIAL CRAZE 45. ANCIENT EGYPT: THE MUMMY STATE 46. MY CHARISMA MAKES ME DANGEROUS 47. EARTHLINGS STAY HOME 48. CHASING WINTER SUN 49. COMMAND Z 50. HOW I SPENT MY BORING HIGH SCHOOL YEARS BEING BAD 51. ROGUE SYMBOLIC ANALYST 52. WHAT NOW EXISTS 53. NEVER PAINT A WOODEN LADDER 54. NEITHER HATCHET JOB NOR HAGIOGRAPHY 55. WET, DRY, DEBT, WRY 56. INVENTING RELIABLE STATISTICS 57. DRUNKO THE CLOWN 58. FISH SAUCE: TAINT NO STOPPING US NOW 59. SHERM BEGORRAH 60. GLOATSMANSHIP 61. TALCUM SOFT ABS IN 40 YEARS 62. PASSEGIATTA 63. HOW EASILY DISTRACTED I...AM? 64. SOMETHING BLACKER THAN THE DARK 65. SLOW COME TRAINING 66. DESTRUCTIVE ENTITLEMENT R US 67. KING WILLOW 68. WE SELL OUR CARS WITH SPORTS METAPHORS 69. HANDLE ONLY AS NECESSARY 70. ALL HAIL YET ANOTHER BLOWHARD RIGHT WING TALK SHOW HOST 71. THE INTERRUPTERS 72. PARALLEL CELEBS 73. COME TO FIND 74. OBIANG 75. NEW FOUND IMMATURITY #30 1. BULLETINS FROM ZONES OF DREAD or 2. CRASHING THUNDER IN THE CAVES OF THE DEAF or 3. WHAT ABOUT THAT FETUS? 4. SLAVE APPRECIATION DAY 5. NORTH BY NOR'EASTER 6. FREMISSEMNETS D'UNE FEUILLE EFFACEE 7. TRANSCENDENTAL MONOTONY 8. STORIES I COULDN'T GET PUBLISHED 9. MULTI DIRECTED IMPARTIALITY 10. THERE IS NO ENEMY 11. TOLSTOY THE KILLER 12. HUCK PREP 13. INVADERS OF THE WORD 14. DISGUSTING GARBAGE 15. GIRLIE MAGAZINE 16. TOUCH THAT DIAL 17. BRIAN AND JOHN: A DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVE STORY 18. PRESIDENT CAM 19. AN ASHANTI IN OLD ASHANTI TOWN 20. WHEN THE CAPISTRANOS COME BACK TO SWALLOW 21. IT'S THE MOUNTAINS OF THE MOON 22. AN ARRESTING PARADOX 23. UNIVERSITY OF SHAKESPEARE 24. ONE SUCCESS IN A DESERT OF FAILURE 25. PENROD MAN 26. COMRADE RICH 27. THE ILLUSION OF GAIN FROM LOSS 28. NEM ES IGEN 29. THE SOUNDS MADE BY CANADA 30. YOU TOO CAN DISTORT THE WEATHER! 31. ANTI NUCLEAR FAMILY 32. A SPECTATOR OF MY OWN STUPIDITY 33. POLICE DOG UNIVERSITY 34. THE ALCOHOLIC EQUIVALENT OF THE BIG BANG 35. BASE 16 36. HONOR BRIGHT 37. MAJOR TROUBLE 38. NOVELWORLD 39. E SOLDIERS 40. LETAMAIO 41. THE MAN WITHOUT A WEBSITE 42. THE DETECTIVE INVESTIGATES THE WRITER 43. AN OCCASION OF SIN 44. FOR PROCRASTINATION ONLY 45. THIS IS THE BIG IDEA 46. BE MY FRIEND...GODFATHER? 47. PROCREATION IS THE THIEF OF TIME 48. LURING THE BOOBS INTO THE NEWS TENT 49. ONE CAR, ONE VOTE 50. I WISH YOU WELL 51. NOT CYNICALLY APATHETIC & ANTISOCIAL & I DON'T CARE WHO SAYS I AM 52. THE WHISKEY COURTYARD 53. HANDS UP IN THE NAME OF THE LORD 54. JACOBIN OF ALL TRADES 55.TELL ME HOW TO FEEL 56. TRAGEDY IS KIND 57. RAGE AGAINST THE COMING OF THE LIGHT 58. THAT'S NOTHING 59. AMMO UNLIMITED 60. THE WRONG BALANCE 61. THE BOOK OF HEARTY LAUGHS 62. THE LIKES OF 63. FAITH, PRIDE AND WISHFUL THINKING 64. FASHION WOMEN 65. JUST ME 66. ANTICIPATED APPLAUSE 67. MR. CAT AND LITTLE MISS DOG 68. UNCLE GOD'S AEON RICE 69. HIPPIE BUSINESS CARD 70. TRAGEDY ISLAND 71. MORE SPINNED AGAINST THAN SPINNING 72. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING 73. MY PRIZEWINNING FIRST NOVEL 74. YUPPIE BRAND NAME COMEDY 75. KILLER IN THE RYE #31 1.OBEY ROBOT WISDOM or 2. OVERSUNG HEROES or 3. WIDENING THE CULL 4. EATING ROCKS MAY LEAD TO BROKEN TEETH 5. SOUND IS A BELL AND SILENCE THAT IT HAS NOT BEEN RUNG 6. NETWORKS OF AMBIVALENCE 7. THE SADDEST OF ALL POSSIBLE HEARTS 8. AIRING THE SAME SIDE TWICE 9. UNDISPUTED MASTER OF MY GENRE 10. CANADA IS A MEDIUM SIZED CITY 11. THE WORLD IS NOT FALLING APART 12. A WHOLE BOOK ABOUT CAT URINE 13. FEAR OF NEWSPRINT 14. A PHILOSOPHY OF BOUNDLESS CYNICISM 15. SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED TO ME 16. TIME CREATES THE MOSAIC OF REALITY 17. NOW IS ALWAYS THE BRONZE AGE 18. THEY WANT TO MAKE YOU THINK THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG 19. INVULNERABLE MENTOR 20. BUILD HIGH 21.KILLER SHRINK 22. THE CRAZY WORLD OF ANIMALS 23. WE CAN MAKE EACH OTHER SOAPY 24. I'LL TELL THE WORLD 25. CAN I GET A BISQUIT? 26. NEUROTIC COWBOY 27. RED CLOUDS 28. SMASH THE STATE, INC. 29. CAPTAIN CHROME 30. BE KILLED OR BE KILLED 31. I COULD HAVE BEEN A VICTIM BUT DECIDED TO PROMOTE MY SURVIVAL INSTEAD 32. NORMATIVE THRUST 33. MAD MEDICINE 34. WHAT? AM I NOT AWARE OF MODERN MUSIC? 35. VINEGAR SHOWERS 36. THE GOLDEN PROJECT 37. LOST PROPERTIES 38. THE HIGHEST NUMBER 39. PRESIDENT AD LITEM 40. DESTINY WHISTLING THROUGH A HOLLOW SHELL 41. GOOD BEER 42. REACTIVE ATTACHMENT ORDER 43. WHY, YOU...YOU! 44. BEAST AND THE BEAST 45. FIRE NOT BAD FIRE PRETTY 46. I BRAKE FOR SLUM GODDESSES 47. FAUX NEWS 48. THE SHOVEL OR THE HOSE 49. DOGGERELIST 50. QUACKY THE DUCK, WOOFY THE DOG & TALKY THE HUMAN SAY QUACK, WOOF AND HOWDY 51. HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL 52. YO SOY EL PLASTIC ARMY SOLDIER 53. REMF AND PROUD OF IT 54. WAR FOOLS 55. SOUVENIR OF DISGRACELAND 56. YEEHAW JUNCTION 57. DOZENS OF ALCOHOLICS 58. STEEL EGGS 59. THE DWARF PASSED OUT AT ABOUT 5PM 60. TICKETY BOO 61. TORY BLUR 62. 617 UNIVERSITY 63. PLAYING WITH THE BOUNDARIES 64. UP, BOY, UP 65. CANDYFLIP 66. AN APOLOGIST FOR STUPEFACTION 67. THE SPOILS OF PEACE 68. FCUK OUY 69. THE END OF THE WORD AS WE KNOW IT 70. THE BOOK OF HEALTHY CARTOONS 71. SHARING YOUR PASSION...FOR MONEY 72. LOWERCASE e IS COOL 73. IF NOT 74. ANTI SONGS 75. WHERE THERE'S A WILL THERE'S WILL A THERE'S WHERE #32 1. CONTENT FAILURE NOTIFICATION OR 2. WIRELESS NOTEBOOK OR 3. COARSE GRAINING 4. MISPRISON 5. TYPICAL AMERICAN 6. TALES FOR YOUNG ‘UNS 7. DETRITUS 8. QUESTION AUTHORITY OR I'LL KILL YOU 9. TOMORROW WHAT? 10. COMPROMISING ALLIANCES 11. REPEAL BIOLOGY 12. GREEN FIRE 12. SUNLIGHT MILDNESS 13. ALL THE CHAFF 14. NOT FOUND IN STORES 15. UNAUTHORIZED AUTOBIOGRAPHY 16. THE BEST IS THE ENEMY OF THE GOOD 17. THE LOUSY AMERICAN NOVEL 18. I'M MAKING THIS UP AS I GO ALONG 19. BE FOOLED BY CHEAP IMITATIONS 20. I'M NOT CRAZY, YOU'RE JUST STUPID 21.THE MASK OF DESTINY 22. SON OF CHAOS 23. LTD UNLIMITED 24. LOATHED BY MILLIONS 25. REBEL WITHOUT APPLAUSE 26. ODDLY NORMAL 27. ADDING INQUIRY TO INSULT 28. ALLEGED IN HIS OWN MIND 29. INTERGALACTIC PARIAH 30. A CONSPIRACY OF ONE 31. CARNAL INNOCENCE 32. CHRONICLE OF MISANTHROPY 33. THE WORLD WITHOUT AN EARTH SHALL BE 34. VALUABLE MISTAKES 35. FRESH FROM BUILDING MUSSOLINI'S RAILROAD 36. SHAMAN OF CLASS ANIMUS 37. FORBIDDEN IGNORANCE 38. THE GREATEST SHOW THAT NEVER WAS 39. SEND MONEY NOW 40. INADEQUATELY TRANSLATABLE IN ENGLISH 41. CLASSICS REGURGITATED 42. ESTEEMED COLLEAGUE 43. THE DAY OF RECKONING 44. MERITOCRACY CIGARETTES 45. I'LL DUST YOUR BRITCHES 46. THE GOLDEN TUBA 47. IT'S ALL IN THE WAY I TELL ‘EM 48. ERROR IN VARIABLE FIELD 49. HAPEX LEGOMENON 50. TALKIN' STUPID NONSENSE 51. PERVERSE STEREOTYPES 52. RADICAL MODERATION 53. MARTELLATISSIMO 54. FROM HERE TO OBSCURITY 55. CAN'T YOU SEE I'M BUSY? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M TRYING TO EAT? 56. BASED ON AN UNTRUE STORY 57. MASTER OF LOVE AND MERCY 58. COMMERCIALLY VIABLE 59. THE INSECURITY ZONE 60. SAINT DRUNK 61. HAMBURGER JOBS 62. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I MEAN 63. INVISIBLE FAME 64. LIGHTS, CAMERA, EXECUTION 65. A WEE CHAT WITH GOD 66. HOME AIN'T HERE 67. DEAR MR. DECEASED 68. SAME AS IT NEVER WAS 69. 1984 & 1/2 70. BUT READ THIS AD FOR AN EVEN BETTER DEAL! 71. MORE POPULAR THAN THE MASTERS I SERVE 72. MY WONDERFUL CHILDHOOD 73. ONE SCOOP CLEANS AND FRESHENS A FULL LOAD! 74. WRONG ENOUGH 75. A TOUGH ACT TO SWALLOW #33 1. NO STYLE, NO SUBSTANCE OR 2. FLESH FROM THE VEGETABLE GARDEN OR 3. PULSATING DRIVEL 4. WORLD WITHOUT ELVIS, AMEN 5. LYNCHING A STRAW MAN 6. LIVE AT THE EPICENTER 7. FRESH RAGE 8. THIS IS THE DAWNING OF THE AGE OF THE PARASITE 9. I'M SORRY, THANK YOU 10. ALL BLURBS MAGAZINE 11. GOD IS A CREATIVE GENIUS 12. LOSER MAN 13. MR. IRRESPONSIBLE 14. I'M A GOOD GORILLA 15. PULL MY FINGER 16. THE BEST TV SHOW NEVER MADE 17. UNEDITED OPINIONS 18. BLATANT EQUALITY 19. NOW ACCEPTING QUESTIONS FROM THE FLOOR 20. SIGNIFICANT WINDOW DRESSING 21. EUTROPHIC OLIGOTROPHY 22. WRONG FROM THE START 23. MEAT COLORED PUPPIES 24. I'M ACTUALLY VERY TALENTED 25. FURORE 26. CLOUDY RADICAL CLARITY 27. NIHILTOPIA 28. CHARISMATIC LOSER 29. A ONE MILLION DOLLAR VALUE, YOURS FREE 30. SOMEONE FOR EVERYTHING 31. I BEGGED FOR A STONE BUT THEY GAVE ME BREAD 32. THE WORST OF BOTH WORLDS 33. DEAR ME, YOU'RE GREAT, SIGNED ME 34. ARKADIA 35. ENSLAVED BY VICTORY 36. I CAN'T EXPLAIN EVERYTHING 37. # 38. THAT'S PARANOIA! 39. ACCOUNT PAST DUE 40. A DEEPLY MORONIC GLINT 41. PEACE CRIMES 42. ANOMIE 43. EXPERT IN HIS FIELD 44. HERESY 45. LETTER WORLD 46. EMPLEANOS! LAVEN LOS MANOS POR FAVOR! 47. A QUESTION OF TIMING 48. JESUS IS AMBIDEXTROUS 49. THIS IS NOT GOOD 50. THE MERCHANT OF VENOM 51. WHINES AND GROWLS 52. TERMINAL VELOCITY 53. FROM OBSCURITY TO OBLIVION 54. ACT VI 55. LOST IN THE MARGINS 56. PLANET BOO 57.INCOMPLETE FABRICATIONS 58. IMMATURE DELIBERATION 59. SOLD FOR THE PREVENTION OF DISEASE ONLY 60. CONVENTIONAL AMORALITY 61. LEFT OF HUMAN 62. AFFIRMATIVE INACTION 63. COUNTERFEIT UNIVERSE 64. A DOG'S HEAD IS SOFTER THAN A BABY'S 65. SUPERBRAT 66. PRINCE OF TIRADES 67. 3WD 68. A MOMENT TOO SOON 69. WORKING CLASS DANDY 70. USERS AND LOSERS 71. AN INSULT TO DEMOCRACY 72. THAT'S INFOTAINMENT! 73. FREE FLOATING RAGE 74. ACTUALLY, IT IS ROCKET SCIENCE 75. SLAVE TO THE BEAST #34 1. MONSTROUS CERTAINTY OR 2. WITH ALL DUE DISRESPECT OR 3. GENERICALLY AN IMPORTANT CASSANDRA 4. THIS IS A JOB HA HA HA FOR CRAZY MAN 5. MOANING IN AMERICA 6. CONSPIRACY FACT 7. FISH IS NOT MEAT 8. SCREAMING CHIMP 9. 5 DEAD EELS, 4 DEAD CARP, 3 DEAD COD, 2 DEAD HAKE, AND A SHARK IN A LITTLE ROWBOAT 10. PROFESSIONAL SLAVERY 11. NONE DARE CALL IT REASON 12. THE HYSTERICAL ILLUSION OF POWER 13. THE SNIDE LECTURER 14. THE CONSCIENCE OF A COWARD 15. MERE ANARCHY 16. SEX, FEAR, HEDONISM AND IRRESPONSIBILITY 17. PREVENTATIVE BURNING 18. DRAIN AND SERVE 19. A FORTUNATE MISUNDERSTANDING 20. NOT THE BEST, BUT STILL A GOOD BUY 21. GOOD TIMEY ALIENATION 22. MODERN CHOICES 23. RESTLESS ECSTASY 24. NEGATIVE CAPABILITY 25. FICTIONAL ERRORS 26. DON'T CONFUSE ME WITH THE FACTS 27. YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT? 28. UNITED WE FALL 29. EVERYDAY HYPE 30. CITIES WILL WITHER 31. ALMOST LIMBO 32. CORRECT ME IF I'M RIGHT 33. SPECIFICALLY VAGUE 34. TEMPORARY SANITY 35. RECIPE FOR FAILURE 36. I AM THE PRODUCT 37. THIS COULD BE A JOB FOR HOAX MAN, BUT YOU'LL NEVER REALLY KNOW 38. WORLD FAMOUS OBSCURITY 39. SIGNED ANONYMOUS 40. FUNNY THINGS MY KID NEVER REALLY SAID 41. A PERSECUTED MAJORITY 42. A BRIGHT FOOL 43. SUPERNATURAL DOG 44. CYNICAL IDEALISM 45. MADMAN STRATEGY 46. SEE SPOT DIE 47. VINEGAR SPONGES 48. IF THAT'S FATE KNOCKIN' AT THE DOOR I'M NOT HOME 49. A CASE OF MISSHAPEN IDENTITY 50. KILL THE EMPIRE 51. A LOATHE/HATE RELATIONSHIP 52. DARE TO BE MEDIOCRE 53. A HARDNESS THAT GOES INTO INSANITY 54. NOT SOLD IN STORES 55. LA HAINE 56. HERE ARE THE NEWS 57. LIFE AS WE GNAW IT 58. PATRONIZE ME 59. ERECTIVE AFFINITIES 60. HUGO BOSS 61. AIR CONDITIONED RESPONSE 62. I HATE FICTION 63. AND KAFKA MAKES THREE 64. MARGIN OF TERROR 65. THAT'S MY NAME WEAR IT OUT 66. AMORAL COMPASS 67. DROWNING IN MILKY NICENESS 68. ALTERNATIVE LIES 69. SOURBALL 70. LIFE ITSELF 71. PREACHING TO THE SUBVERTED 72. A BONE IN THE THROAT 73. ASK ME IF I CARE 74. WHAT YOU SAID 75. WHEN I'M GONE THEY'LL FIND OUT WHAT I DO #35 1.ANGST FOR THE MEMORIES OR 2. UNTOUCHED BY HUMAN HANDS OR 3. SAME PROGRAM BOTH SIDES 4. MR. SAMPLENAME 5. THE GIGGLE TEST 6. MAD ABOUT EVERYTHING 7. DRUNK WITH THE DAWN 8. NOT GREEDY, JUST SELFISH 9. DECLARATION OF ARROGANCE 10. CHAIN JOKING 11. STARS AND SWIPES 12. UNFATHOMABLE CRASSNESS 13. TRAGICALLY CLUELESS 14. THE MALE ITCH 15. FOR THE MAIN AND SIMPLE REASON 16. ACCIDENTAL STRONGMAN 17. KING MONEY 18. A CYCLE OF SHENANIGANS 19. SOME ROOM FOR GUTTER LANGUAGE 20. FAIR SEX 21. COMPLICATED PROPAGANDA 22. CRAMPING GOD'S STYLE 23. SMASHING OLD RECORDS 24. KICKING NAME AND TAKING ASS 25. CREDIT CARDS NOW WELCOME 26. CLASSICS DECLASSIFIED 27. MORE PRODUCT 28. ASSUMPTIONS OF ROUTINE INTELLIGENCE SOURCES 29. EMPTY DISCLOSURE 30. DYSFUNCTIONALITY 31. STOCK DESIGN 32. NOT FROM CONCENTRATE 33. TOUGH LOVE LIBERALISM 34. FARTLING 35. SORE WINNER 36. VOID WHERE PROHIBITED 37. INTELLIGENT PHRASE FILTER 38. PENNIES FROM HELL 39. TRY AND START ME 40. MOTHERCLUCKIN' GOOD 41. AM I ALIVE? DO YOU KNOW? 42. INTERESTING EXCUSES 43. EPSILON CENTAURII 44. PERSONAL WORST 45. GOONY BEARS 46. PARENTAL GUIDANCE 47. FILTHY RELIGION 48. SECRETS OF THE LONELY 49. URBAN IDIOT 50. THE LIMBIC SYSTEM 51. THE TWISTED LADDER OF AMBITION 52. DESIGNER DESTINY 53. YAHOOIE 54. GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENIGMAS 55. SUPERHERO CONFIDENTIAL 56. ELECTORAL COLLAGE 57. MEAT MACHINE 58. STALKING THE HIPPOGRIFF 59. SUCKING UP TO THUGS 60. MR, POLLUTION 61. TRIGGER SAD 62. FIERY PEACE 63. OBESE PAWN 64. HYPERLEXIA 65. LEXICON OF DOOMSDAY 66. USE OF DEADLY FORCE JUSTIFIED 67. OMIT THAT...NOT WHICH 68. FUNNY HA HA 69. THIS IS NOT AN OUTRAGE 70. HAPPYLAND 71. REPUBLICAN WARS 72. AUTOMATIC SCORN 73. ALL POLITICS IS LOCO 74. KIDS TRY THIS AT HOME 75. KITTEN VENOM #36 1. YEAH? SO?? OR 2. I LOVE CAPITALISM OR 3. CATALOG OF UNINTENDED CONSEQUENCES 4. MOCKUMENTARY 5. CARVE THE YEARS 6. WILD UNIVERSE 7. ONLY DISCONNECT 8. WILL NOT DO 9. SERVICE WITH A SNARL 10. PUCKER AND BLOW 11. DEAR PERSONNEL DIRECTOR 12. THIS IS NOT A PLAY 13. BETWEEN TOT AND DOTARD 14. DAMAGED GOODS 15. THE CHURCH OF DRUGS 16. PUNISH THE INNOCENT 17. PROSECUTERS WILL BE VIOLATED 18. CRIMINAL WORLD 19. RANTIN' TO THE OLDIES 20. THE OLD ADVENTURES OF... 21. COGNITIVE ASSONANCE 22. WORK IN PROGRESS 23. WHILE EARTH SNORED 24. CASSETTE ONLY 25. GROWING UP GUY 26. JUST LIKE THE MOVIES ONLY BETTER ‘CAUSE IT'S REAL 27. LINE OUT 28. A POSTHUMOUS EXISTENCE 29. WAYS TO LOOK BIGGER THAN I ALREADY AM 30. SOMETHING OFFENSIVE TO EVERYBODY 31. HOW TO LOSE FRIENDS AND ANTAGONIZE PEOPLE 32. HUMOR NOIR 33. ADDICTED TO SYMBOLS 34. PRESIDENT NOBODY 35. A MATTER OF OPINION 36. THE REALM OF THE IMAGINATION 37. THE CYNIC'S HANDBOOK 38. SIGNAL THEFT 39. DRUNKS ALONG THE POTOMAC 40. SLICK TALKING BALONEY MERCHANT 41. SOME RESTRICTIONS MAY APPLY 42. COMMERCIAL HOMICIDE 43. FOR A BAD CAUSE 44. ALL CIRCUITS ARE BUSY 45. ADS FOR JESUS 46. ONAN THE VULGARIAN 47. PEOPLE ARE NOT LAZY THEY ARE STUPID 48. A PLAGUE ON ALL YOUR HORSES 49. THE BOOK YOU DARE NOT READ 50. REAL SPORT 51. DECLARATION OF DEPENDENCE 52. WARMBLOODED CONTEMPT 53. YOU WORK HERE? FIX IT. 54. IN THE STYLE OF THE MASTER 55. BOSTON: THEORY AND PRACTICE 56. VAGUE UNPLEASANTRIES OF THE WAY 57. FOOD, DRUGS, OIL AND GUNS 58. MORE ANARCHY 59. I INTEND TO FALL DOWN WITHOUT GETTING EGG ON ANYBODY'S FACE 60. THIS IS A J J JOB F FOR PSYCHOMAN 61. BISTRO OF THE APOCALYPSE 62. DR. COFFEE AND MR. TEA 63. NEGATIVE CHARISMA 64. THE FACE OF THE ATOM 65. DATA UNDERLOAD 66. A CURVE BALL IN THE DIRT 67. A FESTIVAL OF AFFECTS 68. HAPPY DUST 69. SOLDIER OF MISFORTUNE 70. I NEVER EXISTED 71. COUNTING MAD SHEEP 72. THE SUCK ZONE 73. THIS CRUEL BALL 74. DIABOLICALLY DULL 75. THE MAN WHO CREATED GOD #37 1. SITUATIONIST COMEDY OR 2. THE HOME SCREEN OR 3. ANTISOCIAL SCIENCE 4. MY WORD 5. REMEMBRANCE OF THINGS PEST 6. BEST FORGOTTEN 7. BEST READ BEFORE DATE STAMPED BELOW 8. PRE POSTMODERN DILLENTANTE 9. THE LUXURY OF DARKNESS 10. THE END PROCESSOR 11. PAST PARTICIPLE INFINITIVE 12. THE QUESTION IS WHICH IS TO BE MASTER THAT IS ALL 13. LIBERTY SMITH 14. ANTI TWERP 15. THE WORK THAT NO ONE ELSE WILL DO 16. A CHOICE BETWEEN THE BAD AND THE WORST 17. A HAPPY BOOK 18. EXOTIC FREAK IN CHAOS 19. POVERTY IN MOTION 20. INTELLECTUALLY IDIOTIC 21. THE REPUBLIC IN PERIL 22. PRESIDENT THUMBSUCKER 23. GET TO THE BACK OF THE LINE 24. CHATTERING SKULL 25. DELICIOUSLY TASTELESS 26. CONDITIONAL REFLEX 27. EXCEPTIONAL PARENT 28. HERE GOES 29. JACK SPRAT'S WIFE 30. SORRY FOR HAVING A STORY TO TELL 31. UNSUSTAINABLE GREENS 32. WHITE MISCHIEF 33. AN ENORMOUS FAN 34. CAPTAIN NOIR 35. HOW DEEP THE BETRAYAL 36. THE ENGINE OF PROGRESS 37. GREATNESS IS A DECISION 38. A CAT NAMED SUPERMAN 39. NATURAL BORN PAIN IN THE ASS 40. I'LL TELL THE WORLD 41. HAPPY PUNK 42. DISORDER IN THE HOUSE OF INTELLECT 43. DIMENSIONS OF THE PROTRACTED CONFLICT 44. PAINTED FIRE 45. BLIND PROCEDURE 46. COMEDY AT THE ADULT LEVEL 47. HEY! 48. GLORY ROAD 49. ARGUENDO 50. INSIDER OUT 51. BAD POETRY WHICH LOOKS GOOD ON PAPER 52. POSTMODERN PARABLES 53. FLOATING PARANOIA 54. AMERICAN MYTHOLOGY 55. LAUGH IT UP HAW HAW HAW 56. LEGION OF SUPER PRESIDENTS 57. SNOWBALL'S CHANCE IN HELL 58. MAN OF INDOLENCE 59. AN AFTERLIFE 60. WANT 61. JUST WAR 62. CUT TO THE CHASE 63. TRAGEDY GIVES PLEASURE 64. SANITISED FOR YOUR PROTECTION 65. GOVERNING AS IF THE 60S NEVER EXISTED 66. YES MEANS NO AND NO MEANS YES 67. GENERATION XYY 68. YOU ARE ENTITLED TO MY OPINION 69. HATE DOG 70. AN IRREGULAR GUY 71. RESENT MEMORY 72. MYSTERIOUS UTILITY WIZARD 73. RADIO FREE AMERICA 74. INIMICAL TO LEGITIMATE BUSINESS INTERESTS 75. MIDWEST PEACE CONFERENCE #38 1. IBID CITED IBID OR 2. ROGUE SCHOLAR OR 3. LORD OF MISRULE 4. THE GOD OF THE 60S 5. THE HERO CHILD 6. MEAT CAGES 7. VIEWERS LIKE YOU 8. CLARK KENT'S NOVEL 9. I'M NOT ONE OF YOUR LITTLE FRIENDS 10. REVENGE FARCE 11. STRENUOUSNESS 12. SECRET IDENTITY POLITICS 13. ILLOGICAL EXTREME 14. LOVE AND WORK 15. POTBOILER 16. BAD IDEAS 17. EPHEMERA 18. FAIR AND COLD 19. OBVIOUSLY DOOMED 20. VAGINA CITY 21. MEET THE WIFE 22. FIAT LUX 23. SINS OF THE GRANDFATHERS, TOO 24. SUPERPREDATORMAN 25. SHADOW HERITAGE SPOKESPERSON 26. SAY, LORD 26. FEARFUL AMORAL INVENTORY 27. LIFE'S MANUAL 28. A BUSINESS OF MY OWN 29. THE BIG BOOK OF CLICHES 30. POSTATOMIC FABLES 31. THINGS I WISH I COULD FORGET 32. DID I EVER TELL YOU...? 33. I CAN'T SLEEP (I MUST SLEEP) 34. LETTERS TO MYSELF 35. NOTHING NEW 36. PROPAGANDA VISION 37. NO ORDINARY MAN 38. READER... 39. WHEN COUSINS MARRY 40. SISTER JESUS 41. INSTITUTIONALIZED STUPIDITY 42. NO SIGNIFICANCE 43. PECULIAR THINKING 44. A VERY WORTHY PERSON 45. PROFESSIONAL AMATEUR NIGHT 46. 24H 47. CHEESELET 48. LIP SERVICE 49. BLOOD AND TREASURE 50. ANSWERS ON A POSTCARD 51. DYSPHORIA 52. CRITICALITY EVENTS 53. CAREER DEICIDE 54. PAP 55. FRACTIONAL RESERVE 56. THE VIGILANTE CONSUMER 57. CONTEMPORARY MANNERS 58. CONUNDRUMS OF ETIQUETTE 59. THE TRIUMPH OF THE SUPEREGO 60. THOUGHTFUL, SERIOUS AMERICANS 61. SOCIAL CONTROL 62. TIME PAST 63. MAD FUN 64. MORE THAN A TREAT A FOOD 65. FLOP ARTIST 66. US #2 67. BEWARE THE PATIENCE OF AN ANGRY MAN 68. OPINION ONLY 69. SUPERMAX 70. HOPELESSLY CORRUPT 71. A SHOW TRIAL 72. NAKED TO MINE ENEMIES 73. 30,000 WORDS 74. PUNCHING ABOVE MY WEIGHT 75. SNIDE TRIPS #39 1. PUNCH DRUNK ON GLOBAL MAYHEM OR 2. JADED ADDICT OR 3. AN APOCALYPSE OF FUN 4. THE CUTTING EDGE OF NOSTALGIA 5. GOD'S WEAKNESSES 6. WALKING IN PLACE 7. PRESIDENT ALIEN 8. 22ND BANANA 9. HARDCORE RESPECTABILITY 10. THE CRAZY GANG 11. ANTI OZ 12. IT'S A TERRIBLE DEATH 13. LIVING IN MY OWN SHADOW 14. SEX AND MONEY 15. A BURNED OUT INTELLECT 16. PERPETUALLY EPITOMIZING DEVIANCY 17. NO FORTUNATE SON 18. ONE OF THE MORE EVIL PEOPLE ON THIS PLANET 19. THE SLAVE WORLD 20. AN ANIMAL WITHOUT HOPE 21. PERVERSE MYTHOLOGY 22. METASTASIZING TECHNOLOGY 23. THE MAGAZINE OF BAD POETRY 24. PSYCHICALLY CHALLENGED 25. A CERTAIN IRONY 26. MY LITTLE LSD DIARY 27. INHUMAN EVENTS 28. THE TIMID COLOSSUS 29. GOD'S DAY 30. THE WORLD'S VOICE 31. DRUGGED INDIVIDUALISM 32. DAMAGE CONTROL 33. MERE ACTIVIST 34. TRAGIC ANTIHERO 35. A MINOR MOTION PICTURE 36. BALONEY WITH ATTITUDE 37. PUBLIC ANTENNAE 38. PIGHEADED MENACE 39. COLLATERAL OFFENCE 40. MINDFUL ENTERTAINMENT 41. FEASIBLE 42. CERTAIN WEIRDNESSES 43. NEGLECTED GARDENS 44. ONE UNIT AWAY FROM EXTINCTION 45. REMAINS TO BE SEEN 46. A FICTIONAL CHARACTER 47. NO IMAGINATION REQUIRED 48. ALL BUT SPENT 49. URBANE DECAY 50. FINITE PAINS 51. UM... 52. BAD CLEAN FUN 53. COMPULSORY RACISM 54. MIDDLE CLASS FREAKS 55. TOO CLOSE TO HOME 56. FALL OF THE HOUSE O' CRUSHER 57. PRESIDENT RASKOLNIKOV 58. I HATE DRUGS 59. IRONY FREE ZONE 60. NOVELTY SEEKER 61. TIME TO KILL 62. PURGE BUTTON 63. I, PEDANT 64. PRECEDENTED DISASTER 65. LOST FOR SPEECH 66. CONFIETOR 67. RUTHLESS ECONOMY 68. HALF OF EVERYTHING 69. TV RATINGS 70. ANARCHIC ERUDITION 71. PASSWORDS TO IMMORTALITY 72. OPINION IS NOT IDENTICAL TO SENTIMENT 73. ANTI BLOCKBUSTER 74. under 21 75. GOD'S PAPER #40 1. TALES OF THE EXPECTED OR 2. ARTIFACTS OF STYLE OR 3. A TERRIBLE IDEA IS A THING TO INTERRUPT 4. HER TEETH ARE A SOOTHING YELLOW 5. HOLD YOUR BREATH 6. GOOD PLANETS ARE HARD TO FIND 7. CULTURAL CONDITIONING 8. REMEMBER YOUR TROUBLES 9. DIRECT TO THE REPTILIAN BACK BRAIN 10. STANDARD CANDLES 11. NATURE'S SPECIAL EFFECTS 12. ORIGINAL WOLD STOCK 13. TILTING AT TURBINES 14. THE TEDIUM IS THE MESSAGE 15. 3/4 ASLEEP 16. FRAGMENTS FROM HERE AND THERE 17. STATIST QUO 18. FORGOTTEN BUT NOT GONE 19. COSMIC DWARF 20. ARROGANT VECTOR 21. MUST TYPE OR PRINT 22. BETWEEN BOREDOM AND ANXIETY 23. A NATION'S WRATH 24. PROFESSOR LITE 25. ASK FOR IT BY NAME 26. ROOTING FOR THE UNDERHOG 27. PRESIDENT MUPPET 28. LOST GEN 2.0 29. INSTANT GOLD 30. SOMEBODY BET ON THE BAY 31. WHIP IT ON ME, JIM 32. ALMOST LIKE 33. IF I HAD MY WAY 34. NEW FUN LAND 35. WE DON'T NEED TO HAVE THIS DISCUSSION 36. IDEOLOGY CLEAR 37. THE VEHICLE OF SUBVERSIVE IDEAS 38. BRINGING IT BIG 39. NARRATIVE DYSFUNCTION 40. LIVING WITH DATA 41. TELLING AND SELLING 42. DEBATING THE OBVIOUS 43. FUN WITH.... 44. MINUS MINUS ONE 45. BEHIND THE EIGHT BALL 46. SYMBOL MAN 47. WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO BE MY FRIEND 48. STUPID IS SMART 49. LAST DAYS, A DELICIOUS THREAT 50. NO LONGER AND NOT YET 51. DON'T CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG 52. A DEFINITE ‘SORT OF' 53. MURDER MAN 54. SLAVE CHAMPION 55. A SUPERFLUOUS TALENT 56. PROLE MODEL 57. AIDING THE CAUSE OF WEIRD REVOLUTION 58. STARING DOOM 59. NONVIOLENT MOB 60. INJUSTICE COLLECTOR 61. LOOK BACK IN LAUGHTER 62. WRONG ENOUGH TO BE REPLACED 63. TODAY'S HERO 64. DANGEROUSLY PERFECT 65. FULL COGNITIVE RETREAT 66. SIN WORSHIPPER 67. THIS IS NOT FOR EVERYONE 68. ALL DOWNHILL 69. CULTURE JAMMING 70. LESS THAN LOVABLE 71. LICENSE THROUGH QUALITY 72. SINATRALAND 73. A FINISHED PRODUCT 74. BALANCED OR WISHY WASHY 75. 100 X #41 1. GIANT STRIDES IN REVERSE OR 2. THE FINE ART OF ENTERTAINMENT OR 3. ESCAPE INTO THE ORDINARY 4. THE MODERATE PARTY 5. THE KOWTOW SHOW 6. NEAR LIFE EXPERIENCE 7. THE TABLE OF CONTENTS 8. IRRECONCILABLE SIMILARITIES 9. PRESIDENT HAMLET 10. A FIEND IN NEED 11. CONSPICUOUSLY NOT SPENDING MONEY 12. ANGRY CAMPER 13. BOOK OF THE WEAK 14. POWER AND VIOLENCE 15. RIDICULOUS IDEALS 16. CAN'T...RESIST...UNDERTOW 17. A TIME TO MAKE NEW ENEMIES 18. MORE FUN THAN FELL 19. BOMB SWEAT 20. YO, STEP UP AND GET BEAT DOWN 21. CAPE DOES NOT ENABLE USER TO FLY 22. CODE OF IMMORALITY 23. THE PLOT THINS 24. THE WARLIKE PURPOSES OF MY ENEMIES 25. SPECIAL MASTER 26. MORE RODENTS FOR PREDATORS 27. A CRASS ACT 28. THE JOKE CYCLE 29. THE 10 COMMANDMENTS OF DRUGS 30. MUCKEYE 31. FISTS GET OUT OF MY FACE 32. FREE THE BUD SIX 33. SHOOT THAT DOG 34. THIS FACTORY SMELLS GOOD 35. SON OF RERUN 36. SUPER DEPRESSED MAN 37. MR. MAN 38. ELLE A CHAUD AU CUL 39. YOU CAN BITE MY... 40. NERVOUS TICS OF THE HACK COMIC 41. SHERIFFTOWN 42. 12 STEP DANCE 43. THE ADULTERATED TRUTH 44. ALTERNATIVE BIBLES 45. PLEASE PASS THE VOM SACK 46. ANTI ENTITY 47. THE MAN FROM ETERNITY 48. YOU AND OTHER PEOPLE LIKE YOU 49. GOD'S EYE VIEW 50. COPING STRATEGIES 51. LET THE DRUGS DO THEIR WORK 52. FELLATIOGATE 53. DESIGNER MYTH 54. SPLATTER VISION 55. ALL ART IS SEXUAL HARASSMENT 56. PEANUT SODA 57. THE TRIUMPH OF MEAT 58. RHETORICAL SUBSTITUTES FOR EVIDENCE 59. COMPOSITE MASTER OF INFINITE TIME AND SPACE 60. KING WASHINGTON 61. CONDITION ONE 62. MANIPULATED VISIBILITY 63. A THING OF EVIL IS A BLIGHT FOREVER 64. IDEOLOGICALLY PLIANT OPPORTUNIST 65. EVASIVE PIETIES 66. ...OK, SO.... 67. WHO KNOWS JACK ABOUT SQUAT 68. GOOFY SINGS THE BEEGEES 69. FAT LIKE ME 70. A POET DOES NOT WRITE ABOUT DALLAS 71. THE CONSERVATIVE IMAGINATION 72. THINGS I LIKE ABOUT MY ASS 73. SANITY GENOCIDE 74. A SERVILE PLOT 75. LIES, LIES AND MORE LIES #42 1. HECK: THE LOGIC OF DARNATION OR 2. WET LOAF OR 3. DUELING HAMLETS 4. THE OLD SHOW 5. AN ENGINE OF DENUNCIATION 6. XENOPHOBES GO HOME 7. INTELLECTUAL DUMBBELLS 8. THIS NONSENSE CANNOT BE PERMITTED TO CONTINUE 9. SON OF MIRACULOUS MANDARIN 10. NOISY SILENCE 11. SAVAGELY OPTIMISTIC 12. RAGE ROAD 13. STILL MORE OF THE SAME OLD INVECTIVE 14. CALL IT ART 15. ON THE GLEAMING WINGS OF SCIENCE 16. SEE ALSO 17. SENSIBLE TRAGEDY 18. BIGGER THAN LIFE 19. I DO NOT BELIEVE ANY OF THIS 20. X (HIS MARK) 21. WHEN THE SMART THING TO DO IS TO LIE 22. ANGES D'ENFER 23. NEW FOLK UNDERGROUND 24. THE BURDEN OF THE LEGACY 25. VAGUELY EVIL 26. IDIOM OF DISTRESS 27. CRAZY TALK 28. THE LAZY CHAMPION 29. A BRAND 30. A MYTHIC ORIGINAL 31. A RATIONAL FEVER 32. THE TERRIBLE POWER OF WORDS 33. A DIFFICULT BOOK 34. A TELEVISION FACTORY 35. THE DISPENSABLE MEN 36. INANITION 37. NOT ART 38. WARRIOR OF DESTINY 39. AUTONOMAN 40. THIS IS A JOB FOR OFFENSIVEMAN, SO BUGGER OFF 41. THE BIGGEST JOKE IN THE WORLD 42. FEAR OF THE UNIVERSE 43. COMING ALONG NICELY THERE ON BASS, ELVIS 44. SELECTIVE INCAPACITATION 45. THE LATEST MESSIAH 46. FRESH KILL 47. NOVELS BLOW 48. I'M HUNGRY MIX 49. WEAPONS OF MASS DISTRACTION 50. BASTARD OF THE WEST 51. THE RETARDED PROFESSOR 52. THIS IS A JOB FOR EROTIC MAN, BABY 53. DESTRUCTIVE PRAISE 54. PRE TRAUMATIC HAPPINESS SYNDROME 55. THE SUPPRESSED MASTERPIECE 56. UGLY! UGLY! FREAK! FREAK! 57. CANNED DREAMS 58. CUT CUT CUT! 59. LIVING MEMORY 60. EARTH DOG 61. A VERY COMMERCIAL FORM OF MENTAL ILLNESS 62. SWAGGERING MOTORCYCLE HOODLUM 63. SANITY COMPASS 64. TRASHOMAN 65. NOT THE WASTE LAND 66. SIMPLICITY AND RELIGIOUS BABY TALK 67. MR. SORRY 68. MANDATE FOR ANARCHY 69. MY CORNER OF THE SUN 70. APOCALYPTIC MODES OF TRUTH 71. ADULT CHILD OF VEGETARIANS 72. SHADOW REPUBLIC 73. GOOD TO HIS MOTHER 74. KING MEAT 75. OAK TREE GET OUT OF MY WAY #43 1. THE TRAGIC KINGDOM OR 2. ART BASED PRODUCT OR 3. IRONY IMPAIRED 4. PRESIDENT OF STRONG DESIRES 5. SHOP AND BE BRAVE 6. WAIT TILL I GET YOU NOW 7. SAVE THE COUNTRY WIN VALUABLE PRIZES! 8. SHIRKING CLASS HERO 9. WHILE AMERICA SCHLEPPED 10. PERPENDICULAR TO ETERNITY 11. WAHH CHOW 12. I KILL YOU 13. ANTICIPATING A WOUND 14. MORE OF THE GREATEST LIES EVER TOLD 15. SUPERFAILURE 16. WHAT THEY DARE NOT CALL HIM 17. AN AWKWARD LIGHT 18. A MACHINE FOR THE BETRAYAL OF THE MEANING OF WORDS 19. THE VORACIOUS MIRROR 20. MORONS OF THE POWER ELITE 21. A FURY FOR PERFECTION 22. WE KEEP OUR VICTIMS READY 23. THE NATIONAL ENTERTAINMENT STATE 24. REALITY WEEK 25. TELEVISION MAN 26. NO...PROBLEM...? 27. BLOOD, MONEY OR JAIL 28. LOW LIFE 29. WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT 30. FATHER AND SON, INC. 31. COMEDY SLAM 32. THE LEAST EXCITING STORY EVER TOLD 33. SAINT PIG 34. FALLEN APE 35. TYRANNY IN ITS MOST MODERN FORM 36. AN AMERICAN TRAVESTY 37.BAD PRESIDENT 38. THINGS I DIDN'T KNOW BACK THEN 39. A FOUNT OF USEFUL MISINFORMATION 40. THE UNCANNY HARBINGER OF DEATH 41. DOSE AND EAT 42. BABY CRIES, MAMA BUYS 43. A SMALL TALE, GENERALLY OF LOVE 44. YOU CAN'T ARGUE WITH VALUE 45. ANTI AMERICA 46. DYNASTY AND DISASTER 47. BEAUTIFUL STEREOTYPES 48. THICK DESCRIPTION 49. MON COEUR MIS A NU 50. WAAH! LOOK AT MY SCREAMING FACE! 51. SHOOT THE FLAG 52. THE SAME ROAD GOES UP AND DOWN 53. THE LIFE OF A HATED SOCIETY 54. DRUGS, GOD, ALCOHOL AND SITCOMS 55. THE FORMULAIC SHOW 56. RUINING IT FOR EVERYBODY ELSE: AN ANTI MEMOIR 57. MEMORIES OF ADULTHOOD 58. GENTLE NOSTALGIA MAN 59. BABY BUMMERS 60. MR. FATSO 61. HEY, DRUNKIE! 62. DEMON CASINO 63. MAY GOD FORGIVE ME 64. NTH RATE 65. SLOVENLY PIGSTY RANCHING 66. PREDICTABLE SURPRISE 67. THAT SHOWS HOW MUCH YOU KNOW! 68. DRIVING IS DADA 69. THE OLDEST BOOMER 70. FICTION FACTORY 71. GOD'S PICKUP LINES 72. ACTUALLY, NO, THAT ISN'T CUTE 73. HISTORIAN OF HIS OWN ACTIONS 74. A HACK'S MEMOIRS 75. I BLAME GOD #44 1. COMEDY, MY WAY OR 2. BIZARRO USA OR 3. DOGMATIC SKEPTICISM 4. MY DOG'S GHOST TALKS TO GOD 5. ARCHITECT OF HIS OWN MISERY 6. TREMBLING ON THE BRINK OF NERVOUS EXHAUSTION 7. KINDLY EXCUSE THE SOUND OF MY DISINTEGRATING DREAMS 8. MASTERABLE DISCREPANCIES 9. PLEASE DO NOT ACCEPT MY APOLOGIES 10. SO FAR, NO GOOD 11. SNOB ISLAND 12. INCONSIDERATE MAN 13. POINTS OF GRIEF 14. LOVE FILTER 15. RESONANCE: A MEMOIR 16. THE FREAKE LIMNER 17. ANADVERTISING 18. GHASTLY ANECDOTES 19. BILLY THE MAN 20. YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS 21. LOVE IS THE ANTITHESIS OF BETRAYAL 22. MY BILLIONS 23. CLOAK OF LIES 24. SAVE THE BABIES 25. THE COMPLETE FRAGMENTS 26. THE MUSH STRATAGEM 27. TRUE ALARMS 28. THE IDEOLOGY OF SENTIMENT 29. WHY JOHNNY CAN'T LIVE 30. LONELY DRUNKIE 31. THE MUSTY SMELL OF DEMOLISHED BUILDINGS ON LIBERTY AVENUE 32. GUNS, GENDER, RACE, RELIGION, AND ARAB ISRAELI CONFLICTS 33. SOCIAL STENOGRAPHER 34. GOODBYE WORLD...HAVE A DAY 35. BARISHNIKOV'S KALASHNIKOV 36. VARIOUS SHADES OF BLUE 37. FLAMING THE MESSENGER 38. ERASE TODAY 39. OLIGARCHICAL LOTTERY 40. THE MORE ILLUSORY THE ENEMY THE MORE RELENTLESSLY HE MUST BE HUNTED 41. SEMI LITERATE VENTRILOQUIST 42. NEAR FETCHED 43. A SUN TANNER FROM AWAY 44. COMPRESSED REALITY MEDIA 45. BALLBUSTER SUITE 46. I SMELL YOUR FEAR 47. WORLD ON HOLD 48. VINEGAR SPRINGS 49. AS IF THERE HAD BEEN NO YESTERDAY 50. SLAVEMASTER 3000 51. TRIBUTE TO VIOLENT REVOLUTION 52. ENTERTAIN ME THAT'S WHY I CREATED YOU 53. I'M AFRAID I'M NOT AFRAID 54. FIRECRACKERS? I THOUGHT IT WAS GUNFIRE GOING OFF! 55. PEEPAW SONNY BOY POP DADDIO PAP 56. RICHARD AHAB NIXON 57. THE MISANTHROPE'S ABECEDIARY 58. HAPPY FUN TIME 59. INTERPRETATION OF SCREAMS 60. THE BLACK GUARD 61. SAVED BY SIDESHOW FREAKS! 62. GOOD SURVEILLANCE 63. DEFEAT REALITY 64. I HATE MIRACLES 65. TROUT BACK 66. MAGICOLORE 67. HISTORY OF BAKED BEANS 68. SLOBBERING BOHUNKS 69. XNOTA 70. MR. RUDE 71. MOUNT SNOCONE 72. THE GEOGRAPHY OF A PIPEDREAM 73. WORDFISH 74. A TEA PARTY OF GHOSTS 75. I WAS WRONG BUT I WAS ALSO ACTUALLY RIGHT #45 1. ROGUE'S THESAURUS OR 2. TEMPORARY INANITY OR 3. EXISTENTIALISM IN A DRUM 4. WORDFIGHT 5. MASHING FOR YEN 6. BEYOND THE FRONTIERS OF NORMAL PERCEPTION 7. FAT SLICES O' AMERICAN PIE 8. THE VOGUISH OBSESSIONS OF THE BOURGEOISIE 9. THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD 10. PLAYING THE LEVELING FIELD 11. POORGEOISIE 12. SURSUM CORDA 13. A MALICIOUS POLEMIC FROM A NOTORIOUS PAMPHLETEER 14. I AM NOT JUST ANYBODY 15. MYTHODRAMA 16. WIT 17. AMERICAN PRIVILEGE 18. SPLITTING THE LANE 19. LOOK MA, NO MELODY 20. MY DOG DISH GOT A HOLE IN IT 21. ICE CREAM CLONE 22. NOTHING RETURNS 23. BELLEZA Y PODER 24. JAM KARET 25. THE SAFETY MASK MAY NOT INFLATE EVEN THOUGH THE OXYGEN IS FLOWING 26. DESPERATELY SEEKING CORPORATE SPONSORSHIP 27. PLAN 11 28. TRUE HOAX 29. DAYDREAM SCENARIO 30. CLINTON DID IT 31. NO MORE NICE MR. GUY 32. A HISTORY OF NAIVE AMERICANS 33. A PLACID MOB 34. SHATTERING CLICHES 35. A PERFECT OPENING PARAGRAPH 36. SCOTT SCOTT 37. TERRA COGNITA 38. A TIME FOR NAME CALLING 39. THE THINKING FEELING ACTING JUDGING HIGHWAY 40. AMORAL EQUIVALENCY 41. A BAN ON HUMAN CLOTHING 42. SANZA ALCUNO RISPETTO 43. PURE GOOFYISMS 44. DARK MATTER 45. CHUMP LOGIC 46. FUN DIP 47. A HISTORY OF INSTANTANEITY 48. GO ROBOT MY GREEK GOD 49. EVEN THE MOB WOULD SHUN HIM 50. MOATED VULNERABILITY 51. COME HERE, HONEY 52. THE MINUTEMEN ARE TURNING IN THEIR GRAVES 53. RENT TO DISOWN 54. QUEEN MONEY 55. MY POWER IS MY PERSONALITY 56. GUARANTEED CONSOLATIONS 57. HOORAY FOR ME 58. ALPHA FEED 59. BRAVE NEW 1984 60. ME NO SPEAK 61. INFRASTRUCTURE 62. THE THING OF SHAPES TO COME 63. I MAY NEVER GET BACK TO YOU ON THIS ONE 64. TETHYS 65. ALLOYED IDIOCY 66. COLD PURSUIT 67. CIRCLING THE DRAIN 68. GREEN AMMO 69. BASIC ORDER 70. THE FROZEN TEARS OF THE GODS 71. SAVE ME JOE LOUIS 72. INVENT LAUGHTER 73. ASSMAN 74. THE DAILY BLADDER 75. WHAT IF BOOKS HAD LEGS AND THEY RAN? #46 1. AUTHENTIC REPLICA OR 2. WHAT IN GREAT DEVIL? OR 3. GETTING WEAK...MUST SUPPRESS...FRAGMENTS OF IDEAS 4. DUH...I MEAN, THAT'S DIFF'RUNT 5. BIG MICRO 6. A BETTER VERSION OF ME 7. ALL WARS ARE CIVIL WARS 8. LORD BRAIN 9. NOW REMEMBERED IF IT ALL 10. NATION BUSTING 11. NOT NO NEVER 12. THE FLYING MONKEYS 13. KING WEIRDO 14. UNIVERSITY OF PEACE 15. A THING IS A TERRIBLE WASTE TO MIND 16. CAREFUL HASTE 17. DOVEWORM 18. SPECIAL TIMES JUST RIGHT 19. THE FORMER UNITED STATES 20. SAVIORS OF SEPTEMBER 10 21. A PARADE OF DRUNKENNESS AND KITSCH 22. POSHLUST 23. ME CHRIST 24. YOU CRAZY MENS 25. THE GOOD OLD DAYS OF KING ZAHIR 26. CITE YOUR SOURCE 27. ALBION PASHMINA 28. IMPRACTICALITY IS THE GREATEST SIN 29. WE WILL USE YOUR IRON 30. FORGET LIFE 31. UNREASONABLE PEOPLE CAN AGREE 32. THE VELVET SEWER 33. THE POISONED LOLLIPOP 34. THE ORIGINAL IDEAS 35. BORED NOW! 36. THE POETRY OF THE PHILISTINES 37. DON'T JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS CLOSING PARAGRAPH 38. AN EMETIC SCIAMACHY 39. KRAZY REALITY 40. THE BIG IT 41. NATIONAL CORRUPTION LEAGUE 42. 100 MILLION FLOWERS IN A FIELD 43. HEY! YAHOO! THIS IS A JOB FOR MR. STUPID LOUDMOUTH 44. A FEARFUL TRUST 45. CAVEAT FOR THE GENERAL 46. THE GREAT BEFORE 47. SPEAKABLE HORROR 48. MAD ENGLISH 49. ENJOY MY SUCCESS! 50. HANDPICKED BY CRITICS 51. CHEERED TO THE ECHO 52. I AM...BUT WHAT I AM! 53. SPITTING COTTON 54. SPEAKING OF WHICH 55. TWITTERING BULLETS 56. AVARICETOWN 57. PINE AND FLAY 58. GREAT CRY AND LITTLE WOOL 59. THE ADVENTURES OF FERAL DOG AND SCARECAT 60. THE ACCUMULATED STUPIDITIES OF THE YEARS 61. OBESITY, VIOLENCE AND BIGOTRY 62. THE USUAL HUMAN CONCERNS 63. AN UNEASY MIX OF TRAUMA AND TREACLE 64. THE GLUTTON MARTYR 65. MY DAD: AN ELOQUENT TESTIMONY 66. THE USA SAGAS 67. INTERESTING EDITORIAL 68. THIS HERE BOOK BY ME 69. DANGEROUSLY UNBIASED 70. BONAFIDE LIES 71. A DRUNKEN TEMPERANCE LECTURER 72. CRIME TIME TELEVISION 73. AMERICA, BYZANTIUM 74. MY FELLOW MADMEN.... 75. HOW THE HELL ARE YOU! #47 1. HARD FUNNY TRUMPS WARM FUNNY OR 2. THE HOUSE OF SEVEN GOBBLES OR 3. KITTY A LA KING 4. HERE'S A CRISPY DINNER FOR THE FAMILIES ON RELIEF 5. THE COSMIC IMAGES OF DREAD 6. LOOKING FOR GOD IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES 7. SIDE BY SIDE WE FELL LIKE DEVILS TILL THE EVENING OF THE DAY 8. DOLLAR BOY, MONEY COMMANDER AND MASTER OF CASH 9. MY GOD! WHAT A SHAME! HOW HEARTWARMING! 10. PHANTOMS OF LOST LIBERTY 11. NARRATIVE MEANING 12. I READ WITH GREAT INTEREST 13. THE FROZEN TEARS OF THE GODS 14. COMRADE MOVSKA KHARKOV'S COMMUNIST TOP 40 COUNT DOWN 15. WHAT I DON'T KNOW COULD FILL A BOOK AND THIS IS IT 16. RANTING WARS 17. HOLA, SOY BARBIE! 18. REGULAR NUTS 19. MUNDANE STUDIES 20. EMETH 21. DEMONSTRATING AGAINST REALITY 22. A GEEK WITH A BACKBONE OF STEEL 23. CONTINUOUSLY DARNING THE AIR IN ONE SPOT 24. INSISTENCE ON FIGHTING BATTLES AGAINST NO OPPONENT 25. LET MY KIDS TOUCH YOUR FACE 26. MY WORK IS PRIMARILY AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL NO, REALLY IT IS 27. SONGS IN PROSE 28. ART PAIN 29. MALWARE 30. I WORSHIP WHO TV SAYS IS GOD 31. MAGIC TIME 32. CRAMPTOWN 33. IMPENDING MEDIUM 34. WILL LESS MISANTHROPY 35. TABOO KNOWLEDGE 36. SPRACHPANSCHER 37. WHORES AND PORN, PEPSIS AND MARTINIS 38. THE DIMINISHING AEGIS OF THE US 39. UNIVERSITY OF RAPINE 40. THE ADJECTIVES OF LIFE 41. BOURGEOIS FALLS 42. THE TRAGEDY BROTHERS 43. I'M GOING TO LET YOU GO NOW 44. A STRANGE NEW RESPECT 45. ENFERMEDAD DE LOS PULMONES 46. I SLEPT DEEPLY FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE 47. PROSPEROUS MEANS FAT 48. AVERAGE COLOR OF ALL LIGHT 49. VICTIM MAN 50. IDEAS THAT CIRCULATE LIKE LANGUAGE 51. PENNILESS AND UNEDUCATED 52. YOUR DAILY DOSE OF JESUS 53. RIGHT IS WRONG IN TIME 54. GETTING BACK TO IT ALL 55. STELLAR LARDASS 56. NEGRO PLEASE! 57. TOELVA SKJAR 58. KARMA FREE ZONE 59. PUNITIVE INDIVIDUALISM 60. MARLENE DOMINATRIX 61. ORDERED RAGE 62. KING MEAT OF THE HOUSE OF WOO 63. HARM'S WAY 64. TORTURE WARRANT 65. IDENTIFY TENDENCIES 66. JOY IN JOYLESS PACKAGES 67. RORSCHACH COMPANY 68. FEARLESS FOR THE TRUTH 69. YOU CONSULTED AND DECIDED...CORRECTLY 70. EVIL STORY 71. A PLAY WITHOUT AN AUDIENCE 72. GODFINGER HE LOVES ONLY GOD...ONLY GOD...HE LOVES GOD! 73. SAINT MONEY 74. ERARIT JARIT JAKA 75. THE LURE OF THE GONG #48 1. ATTITUDE SICKNESS OR 2. AN EXCESS OF FAILURES OR 3. A TRIBE OF HALLUCINATING NOMADS 4. NICE IS A WEAPON 5. KING MONEY 6. TO FATSO WITH LOVE 7. MAD AGENTS OF THE BOURGEOSIE 8. GASPING WITH RAGE 9. GOOGLEPLEX 10. MUTT SLOP 11. SWEET HALLUCINATION 12. SUPERWILD 13. GENIUS, FRAUD OR BOTH 14. A SALES TACTIC TO SELL CAPITALISM 15. WE WILL FORGET 16. GOOD STORY 17. CHURCH OF ZOG 18. BURIED MIDNIGHT 19. SECRET X 20. STRANGE TO YOUR EARS 21. DANGER IS MY BEER 22. RECKLESS EYEBALLING 23. WHITE FOLKS’ FOOLISHNESS 24. LEGALIZE CHEATING 25. PAP IDOLS 26. FILTH GANG 27. AUTHENTIC BOTTOM FEEDERS 28. BLESSEDNESS 29. A LACONIC OBSCURITY 30. CIRCUS FUN 31. NONSENSE AND ACCIDENTS 32. CALL ME UP IN DREAMLAND: A FICTIONAL MEMOIR 33. THE MOST UNEVENTFUL DAY 34. PROPHET OF NIHILISM 35. THE PALACE OF INFORMING 36. VERUM FACTUM 37. CONTEMPTABLE ESTEEM 38. KITTY PhD., K.A.T. 39. A WILD ORGASM OF PROTESTERS 40. OVERNICE 41. ARE YOU KEEPING YOUR EYE ON THE ROAD? 42. WHINING FOR ASSHOLES 43. ROBOT OPERATORS 44. THE STUPID ISLANDERS 45. MR. JEEP 46. KITTEN TALK 47. ATOMIC BOULEVARD 48. FATTY GETS LAID 49. VANILLA PENNY 50. WHO PUSH THE EXPERTS ON THEY ARE THE GODS--THE GODS 51. SIR BRAT 52. HIEROGLYPHIC WORLD 53. 13 GHOULS AND A GUY 54. WHO CAN BEST LOSE? 55. MY SON GOOFUS 56. KTEMA ES AEI 57. MYSTICOFUSTIAN 58. A RANDOM SWOOP UPON THE QUOTIDIEN 59. MATURE DISCUSSION IS IMPOSSIBLE 60. TOWARD 61. KATZENSTEIN AND DOGULA 62. PRODROMIC 63. REAL IMPORTANCE 64. DIERESIS 65. INTERESTING... 66. INANATION 67. BLUE DETECTIVE 68. VIEWING THE WORLD DEAD ON 69. UNIVERSALLY IGNORANT 70. YOU WILL UNDERSTAND 71. THE ANDROID MANIFESTO 72. BONES SHOWING 73. THE COMEDY TEAM OF ORANGE AND GOLD 74. NULLA DIES SINE LINEA 75. I CANNOT TELL A LIE, AND OTHER LIES #49 1.UNFASHIONABLE OBSERVATIONS OR 2. ROBOT ENJOYMENT OR 3. MEIN PAPAGEI FRISST KEINE HARTEN EIER 4. YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SALIENT 5. SAINT MONEY 6. GASPING VIRAGO 7. EVERYBODY’S STRAIGHT MAN 8. WHEN GOD SHALL WIPE AWAY ALL TEARS 9. MISTRESS OF OVERSTATEMENT 10. THE ONLY PLACE WHERE MYSTERY ABIDES 11. THE STUFF OF SANITY 12. PEST CEMETARY 13. PRETTY LITTLE CRACKHOUSE SUSIE 14. A PEACEABLE FOOL 15. ATL, EST, CST, MST, PST, ALA, HAW 16. SOMETHING WORTH COMPLAINING ABOUT 17. THE MAN WHO TURNED ELECTRICITY INTO AN ART FORM 18. LONG TIME SEE 19. CARDBOARD ECSTASY 20. TRUTH TRUTH NOTHING BUT TRUTH 21. IN MY HUNGER I’M THE BOSS 22. WITH EYES IN MY FEET 23. ABSENTEE THOUGHTLORD 24. APOCALYPSE NOW & THEN 25. SIESTA PSYCHOLOGY 26. SUPERTAMED 27. THERE IS BUT ONE GUARD 28. THE LOWER ELEVATIONS 29. THE PLAY 30. L’ABSINTHE REND FOU 31. FRUGAL HAG 32. WEAPONS OF LASS DISTRACTION 33. EARIE ORIE YOU ARE OUT 34. VERITAS LIBERABIT BONITAS REGNABIT 35. 10-50, 16-61, 28-82 36. DEAD PEASANT POLICIES 37. THE VILLAGE OF THE DARNED 38. THE TONGUELESS SILENCE OF DREAMLESS DUST 39. A BAD BOY COULD BE A GOOD BOY WHO’S JUST IN LOVE 40. HATE STORY 41. THE SLEEP CAMPAIGN 42. THE STRANGE CAREER OF VULGUS MOBILE 43. COWARDLY OIKS 44. THIS IS A JOB FOR SUBURBAN MAN...AFTER I FINISH MOWING THE LAWN 45. MY POST-FAME LIFE 46. THIS IS THE ONLY BOOK THAT MATTERS 47. BIODRECK 48. PERMANENT CONTRADICTIONS 49. INSEPARABLE DIALECTIC 50. THE HUNGRY NORTH 51. REACTIONARY GEORGE 52. SESSYLU 53. PRO-DEFAMATION LEAGUE 54. TO OPEN 55. IRRATIONALISMS OF EVERY SORT 56. HATE MACHINE 57. PICK MADNESS 58. I AM A REALLY COOL ETHNIC GUY 59. HALF A CHIMP 60. LIKE THEY SAY 61. COOPERATIVE SUBMISSIVE ORDER 62. PRESIDENT JECKYLL 63. MR. TROUBLE 64. THE 10TH WAVE 65. LA VI PARADA AHI 66. GOD’S LIKING 67. ARTY MEANS DIRTY AND SMART MEANS DULL 68. THE GREAT SPECTRUM ROBBERY 69. POINT BLANK 70. CHANNEL ONE MILLION 71. FREEZONE 72. ELEVATIONS 73. D-DUST? 74. THE BORDER 75. A THING INDIFFERENT #51 1. VICIOUS MIND POISON 2. PREFAB SARCASM 3. SHELLOUT FALTER 4. THE POSSIBLE HEROISM OF PERFUNCTORY THINGS 5. MANLY OPPOSITION TO THE MACHINATIONS OF TYRANNY 6. DEVIANTS ALL 7. SOME NEW VOLUME OF SMOOTH TWADDLE 8. INSTANT IRONY--JUST ADD SUPERFICIALITY AND FAIL TO BE STIRRED 9. MORON NATION 10. FASCIST THEME PARK 11. THE MARK OF DISNEY 12. TO GOVERN MYSELF DOESN’T ENTER MY STUPID HEAD 13. RIPPING OFF THE PROLES 14. PREENING TURD 15. THE APOCALYPTIC BOUNDER 16. POOL OF STILL WATER 17. VISUAL UPHOLSTERY 18. AESTHETICALLY AGGRANDIZED 19. THE THREAT MATRIX 20. OMPHALOSCOPY 21. LITTERA SCRIPTA MANET 22. SOLUTION TALK 23. OUTLAW HORMONES 24. THE LORD’S DOG 25. KID FEAR 26. PAINLESS TRUTHS 27. JOHNNY ALCATRAZ 28. OUR LADY OF SIN 29. SIR MUTTLEY 30. DECADENT RASP 31. A 3 32. IDIOPOLIS 33. PORTRAIT OF A LADY-KILLER 34. ROCK & ROLL, JESUS AND FRANKENSTEIN WILL NEVER DIE 35. I HATE GRANDMA 36. NARCISSIST’S CONVENTION--EVERYONE OUT BUT ME 37. PLEASURE BOYS 38. OLD HAM AND HACK 39. MILLIONS HAVE DEPRESSION--AND YOU CAN TOO! 40. A KID IS A BABY GOAT 41. VANILLA SEX 42. MISLI SHAYJO 43. WHEN IN DOUBY, EXTERMINATE 44. VOCATION OF AGONY 45. LOQUE PERDIMOS Y LO QUE NOS QUEDA 46. IMAGINARY ENEMY 47. KILL THE MARTIAN 48. I DON’T DESERVE MY SELF-ESTEEM 49. MENDACITY, VICIOUSNESS & SMARM 50. AWRY 51. TORMENTED DERISION 52. WAR AGAINST TWO MASTERS 53. HOLY NOISE 54. GENRE KILLER 55. AFRAID OF FREEDOM 56. EXTREME PRAGMATISM 57. SAL BER YON ROSH 58. CRAZY GOLF 59. ALL THAT MARY STUFF 60. HARMLESS KILLER 61. A LAMENT FOR BROKEN PROMISES 62. AN EXHIBITION OF INTIMACY 63. A NATION OF DEDICATED LARDASSES 64. INFANTILE RESPECT 65. EXPERT MEDIOCRITY 66. A RUINOUS UTOPIA 67. UGLY SHOWMANSHIP 68. THE EVIL LORDS OF LITERATURE AND THE THEATRE 69. I’M COOL, HE SCREAMED 70. MR. SOFT BAKERY 71. MOCKING THE FOLLIES OF GHOSTS 72. WHITE GLUT 73. TO BE HUMAN 74. THE LONELINESS OF INNUMERABLE HEARTS 75. BLACK ANGEL’S CHAMBER OF FUN ‘N’ DEATH #52 1. MONEY GROWS ON TREES 2. SURVIVAL OF THE CUTEST 3. ARTIFACTS OF HUMAN INTELLECTION 4. FAITHFUL CARNIVORE 5. UNIVERSAL CORRUPTION SATELLITE 6. PIMP JUICE 7. SUBURBAN MAN 8. A CARGO OF EXPLOITABLE SOULS 9. SNAKEHEADS 10. SUCKER RALLY 11. LOYA JIRGA 12. DARK BACKWARD & ABYSM OF TIME 13. RULE 110 14. A ROMAN INCIDENT 15. DESIGANTED FREE SPEECH AREA 16. INSCRUTABLE FLORIBUNDITY 17. RIDICULOUS DITHERING 18. A PHANTOM BRAIN 19. PSYCHORAMBLE 20. PIRHANA ELITE 21. AURA OF INDISPENSIBILITY 22. RUBRICS & VESTMENTS 23. IN SEARCH OF THE KNOWN 24. SIMULTANEOUS SUGGESTION OF OPPOSING POSSIBILITIES 25. THE RIGHT TO BE STUPID 26. ABSOLUTE MAZE BRIGHTNESS 27. THE NOVELIST WHO COULD BE YOU! 28. SUPEREPROLE PARTY 29. UNLIKELY INSISTENCE 30. INNUMERABLE PICAYUNE RULES 31. IMAGINARY ENEMIES 32. WRITTEN WITH THE BASEST OF MOTIVES 33. ANY THINKING PERSON 34. EMINENTLY LEGIBLE 35. OPINION-MONGERING 36. NOUS SOMMES TRAHI 37. 16 TREASONS WHY I LOATHE YOU 38. OCCIDENTAL DESPOTISM 39. LITE SATANIC MILLS 40. CONCRETE UTOPIA 41. THIN DESCRIPTION 42. TOOLS OF EXEGESIS 43. I DON’T BELIEVE IN LOVE BUT IN EVIL TREACHERY 44. TOUGH HATE 45. SUNBURNED BY IDEAS 46. THIRSTY FOR THE APPROVAL OF A FICKLE PUBLIC 47. HYMNS TO TYRANNY 48. ICE CREAM SOCIALISM 49. UNAMERICAN STORIES 50. THE EVOLUTION LEAGUE 51. THERE IS NO SELF THAT WILL NOT CRUMBLE 52. THE CITY OF REFUGE OUT OF REACH 53. ABSENT STORIES 54. HALF THE MORONS YELL FOR FILTH 55. LITERARINESS 56. THE PHILOSOPHER’S INNER CITADEL 57. L’ODORE DEI SOLDI 58. AMERICAN BABYLON 59. A TALENT FOR CATASTROPHE 60. AN ENERGETIC TALENT FOR THE MACABRE 61. UNANSWERABLE APHORISMS 62. BASED AT NO POINT ON OBSERVABLE REALITY 63. UNREADABLE TRACTS 64. VIRTUTEM FORMA DECORAT 65. MANSION OF BAD DREAMS 66. CANDID ADDITION 67. SWASHBUCKLING ANACHRONISM 68. THE JOY OF BIZARRE ADVENTURE 69. NOT EXACTLY JUSTICE 70. CRACKING NUTS WITH A FEATHERDUSTER 71. THE FULL EXTENT OF OUR IGNORANCE 72. A RICH AND STUBBORN PARTICULARITY 73. EXPLOSIONS & ROMANCE 74. 10,000,000 MANIACS 75. O2, PART TWO #37 76 100: TWENTY FIVE SHORT SHORT STORIES TO READ ALOUD 1.WE WERE POOR, BUT HONEST. We were poor but honest. Most of the time. But I will say this: We weren't particularly clean. 2. THE NEIGHBORHOOD CANDY STORE Growing up, my family didn't have a lot of money, so I didn't always get to eat a lot of candy. And when I did I had to buy it from the neighborhood candy store. Which was run by an old man who always wore an apron and who had an enormous thumb. And he sold nothing but the cheapest kind of candy. All the other kids got to eat M & Ms. Only they didn't sell that kind at my neighborhood candy store. At my neighborhood candy store they sold Ms. Funny thing about Ms: They melted in your mouth. They melted in your hands. They probably would have melted on the surface of Pluto. Because they were Ms! Fucking Ms! 3. DAD, PHD My dad was a college professor, which is probably one reason why he was always lecturing me. 4. A MOST SPECIAL LI'L BIRTHDAY PARTY We love our dog. Pa says we treat him just like a human. Pa, he says the dog eats better than we do. Well Sir, now here's a funny little story. About 5 weeks ago, the dog turned 3, which is 21 in human years. So, in honor of his reaching adulthood, we gave him a very special little party. We made him a warm winter coat out of a leftover turkey carcass. We made him a little birthday cake out of canned dog food. And we crowned it with 21 candles! Also, in honor of this very special occasion, we gave him a special little treat. We gave him his very first can of beer. Well, let me tell you this. He liked the beer so much he finished the whole six pack. That was a night to remember! He knocked over the cake, sent all the candles flying, and the house burned down! So we live in the forest now. Well, Sir, and let me tell you something else: That dog STILL eats better than we do! 5. LIBERAL DAD My Dad was a liberal, so just to piss him off I brought a white girl home. 6. THE HEARTWARMIN' STORY OF THE MAN THE TOWN CALLED "COACH" "Coach" was a very popular figure in our community, much admired by people of all ages and conditions, but particularly by we boys, who played on his basketball team, or maybe it was his football team, I disremember which. Anyway, maybe one reason everyone loved him was that he was a really great listener, and also he really understood human nature. For instance, one time, during a game, I made a bad mistake and at half time, "Coach" took me aside and quietly said to me, in that special way of his, "Remember, Son—they're not laughing AT you—they're REALLY laughing at you" 7. THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A BAD BOY There's no such thing as a bad boy. Absolutely not. But from personal experience I know that there is such a thing as a criminally insane boy. This post has been edited by dimenno: Feb 22 2011, 10:29 PM

dimenno	Feb 22 2011, 10:32 PM Post #2312
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	#37 76 100: TWENTY FIVE SHORT SHORT STORIES TO READ ALOUD 8. MISS GRIZABELA THE TOWN LIBRARIAN The town librarian always went out of her way to be helpful and kind, especially if she felt that a child was the victim of unfair treatment. In fact, she would often launch herself head first into a controversy without even thinking about the consequences. She was very logical but also intuitive, and the townspeople would often go to her with their problems. Often times, proceeding only on a hunch, she would come up with a solution that satisfied everyone and hurt no one. Folks often wondered what event in her life had compelled her to take up residence in our small town. For, clearly, she was intended for better things. Even though she seemed to have had wide experience of the world, still, she seemed content to be always busying herself with a dozen different little projects at once, nearly all of them involving ways to improve the lives of others in our little town. Well, this particular story has a tragic ending. Miss Grizabela wore glasses and was very shy. But she when she took her glasses off and let her hair down she was still very shy. And practically blind. Which made it very easy for me and my buddies to knock her down and steal her purse. How were we to know she also had a weak heart? 9. AN APPLE A DAY An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now, that's just fine. But I need to know what keeps the policeman away. 10. HIPPIE DAD Back when my Dad was a hippie he would say, "Son—I'm going to teach you a lesson I'll never remember." 11. SMALLSVILLE When I was about sixteen I was sent to live with my relatives in Smallsville for the summer. We were related to the Kents on my mother's side, which is how I got to know Superboy. When he was bad he would get coal in his stocking for Christmas, but when Pa Kent left the room, just to spite him, Superboy would use his super strength to squeeze the lumps of coal into diamonds. Which he would then trade in for all kinds of wonderful toys. Anyway, that summer, I took Superboy to a bar and bought him a very tasty mixed drink. He told me he never had a drink before and it was tasty and what was it called. When I told him it was a "Kryptonite Cocktail" he spat it out so violently he beheaded the bartender! Needless to say, he was banned from THAT establishment for several months! Anyway, after that experience he was kind of woozy so he gave me the keys to his car and I started to drive him home. Unfortunately, I drove the car off a cliff and wrecked it. And he was plenty mad. I asked him why it was so easy to wreck his car, seeing as how he was Superboy. And he told me that the reason was, it was in its Clark Kent identity. 12. JUST BE YOURSELF My Mom would always say, "People will like you better if you just be yourself." Then I had to tell her yet again that I was a transvestite. 13. MY DENTIST My dentist was also my psychiatrist. One day he told me that my cavities were all in my head. 14. I WAS SAD I was sad because I had no shoes. Then I met a man who had no feet. So I kicked him. Good and hard. Only I couldn't hurt him very much by kicking him with my bare foot, so I knocked him down and stole his wallet and bought me a nice pair o' hob nailed boots. But I'm not all bad. After coming back and giving him a couple of good hard kicks I felt so good about my new shoes that I left off torturing him for a while and started picking on cripples my own size. 15. THE WILD HOLLYWOOD PARTY One time I went to one of those wild Hollywood parties you're always hearing about. Nothing much happened. Oh! But I did see a dish full of what I thought was cocaine. Only it turned out to be heroin. Don't you just hate it when that happens? 16. HOW I MET MY WIFE Unlike most men, I still remember—vividly—how I met the woman I was someday to take as my wife. I even remember the first thing I ever said to her: "Hey--LADY—are you going to finish that drink?" 17. MY WEDDING DAY The day I got married I'm afraid I caused quite a scene, though it was totally unintentional. I guess I was kind of nervous because when they preacher said, "Do you take this woman?" I didn't say, "I do." I said "Yahooie!" 18. THEY CAN'T TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME! I know just about everything there is to know about belligerently hanging on to my principles when people try to convince me otherwise after I provoke them into an argument and they can't take that away from me. I dare them to try. 19. A BULLET WITH MY NAME ON IT If I seem at times to be unnaturally subdued, it is because I know that somewhere out there is a bullet with my name on it. How do I know? Because it has been bouncing checks all over town. So now my credit rating is "shot" ha ha to hell. 20. THE POLICE AUCTION I spent a few hours recently at the police auction and it was a pretty interesting experience because, contrary to popular belief, policemen, when they get together in groups like this, don't really behave any differently than anybody else. There was only one small incident at the end of the auction. Two cops got into a bidding war and as the bids began entering the stratosphere, one officer kept getting angrier and angrier, and finally he pulled out his gun and shot a big hole in the ceiling. The auctioneer paused, and then, finally, he said "Sold! To the man with the .38 magnum!" 21. THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME There's no place like home. Truer words were never spoken. Especially if you currently reside in a plastic dog igloo in the back yard of a superannuated wino who lives right outside of Buffalo, and "home" is a Kuwaiti seraglio in a royal palace staffed by petulant eunuchs and protected by scimitar wielding bodyguards. 22. THE $180 SPEEDING TICKET A policeman pulled me over for speeding. He asked me if I knew why he pulled me over. I said, "Meow." 23. A BARREL OF MONKEYS Nothing's more fun than a barrel of monkeys. Except maybe a barrel with one monkey…giving you that special little smile.... 24. BIG CHIEF HUG UM AND KISS ‘UM In my heyday, an awful lot of girls called me "Big Chief Hug ‘Um and Kiss ‘Um." Unfortunately, they were all in the 10th grade. My lawyer says I will be eligible for parole in 60 years. 25. WHO IS RIDDLE? WHERE IS RANSOM? Looking back on my long career, two questions continue to plague me. Who is Riddle? And where is Ransom? Judging from their names, I may never know. #40 76 100. UNINSPIRATIONAL THOUGHTS FOR TODAY APOLOGIA: I hate to be a major league drag, but did you ever have one of those days when you just didn't feel like making excuses for the dull wittedness of other people? Days in which you just don't want to be actively nice, or even absentmindedly pleasant? Days, in fact, when you feel downright mean? Well, here are some uninspirational thoughts for when you're feeling like that. WARNING: Do not write fawning letters to me in which you tell me how much you liked these witty sayings of mine, because I see right through your twisted little game, Jim OR SHOULD I SAY, "MR. JAMES"? Know this: I am no longer in any position to do you any favors. Listen if you had thrown me just one little iota of respect back when it mattered, you wouldn't be in the jam you're in today. And hey saying you're sorry just doesn't cut it. No guts, no glory. You snooze, you lose. Lead, follow, or get out of the way. You know, I really don't need this.... 76. It was only when I started stealing weapons to commit further crimes that my phenomenal run of good luck really began. 77. You cannot change your life by changing your life. Zero plus zero will never equal one. 78. Nurture your mind with thoughts think by great men, for your own are so mundane as to induce laughter in sick babies. 79. A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle and remember, the same goes for a crack pipe or a Molotov cocktail. 80. Have no fear for what tomorrow may bring even though a tough gang of street punks have promised to give you a major league thrashing, maybe there will be a sale on bandages. 81. Honesty is the best policy--when the camera's running. 82. In wine there is truth, and in whiskey there's some extra strength truth mixed in with a whole lot of hidden resentments which have been boiling under the surface for about ten years and which only start to come out between drink number six and number seven, and there's also a lot of shouting and usually stuff gets broken, which is why I tend to stick to seltzer water. 83. The truth shall set you free but if I were you I wouldn't go about sharing that particular bit of wisdom with the boys in Cell Block A. 84. Not every man is born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Especially if he already has a forked tongue. 85. The meek shall inherit the earth and after that we'll get to see just how far a fellow can get with the meek routine. 86. Beggars can't be choosers, but certain people and I name no names can stand in line at the supermarket checkout counter haggling with the clerk over raggedy assed 20 cent off coupons which expired weeks ago, counting out every lint encrusted penny from the bottom of their mildewed change purse and answer me this if they're so penny conscious, then why haven't they already added up the total in their heads and gotten the exact change ready in advance... unless they're really desperate even for negative attention? 87. Everything's coming up roses, which is too bad, because actually I was fixing to grow me some poppies, hemp and mushrooms. 88. Business before pleasure, especially if you're a prostitute. 89. Happiness is realizing there's always someone less fortunate than you, or, better yet, that there's someone more fortunate than you but not any more because you just slipped on his driveway and your lawyer is F. Lee Bailey. 90. Life is just a bowl of cherries but remember that President Zachary Taylor died of indigestion after eating too many cherries. 91. There is strength in numbness. 92. The family that prays together stays together. I guess that's true even if what they're praying for is a quick and easy death. 93. Blood is thicker than water, but I'd prefer tomato juice, if you don’t mind. 94. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink, only who can afford to keep a horse these days? 95. Don't cut off your nose to spite your face it didn't work for Michael Jackson. 96. No labor, however humble, dishonors a man. Except maybe telemarketing. 97. Remember: always look on the bright side, unless you're driving late at night and it's the oncoming headlights of an out of control 18 wheeler. 98. If an alien came to earth and said take me to your leader I think that on the way I would suggest we stop at the International House of Pancakes, just to give him a taste of the sheer diversity of this kooky planet. 99. Hysteria repeats itself. 100. I wanted to be known as an optimist, and, in so doing, I had hoped to provide a haven of hope in a confused, frustrating and seemingly futile world. But then I realized that it was hopeless. #53 1. APOCALYPTIC STEW or 2. PRESIDENT MCCLOWN or 3. POX AMERICANA 4. EMPATHIC IMPERIALISM 5. A MORON PUPPET LEADING US OVER THE PRECIPICE 6. FOE MANAGEMENT 7. I WOULDN’T DISGRACE IT BY CALLING IT HUMAN 8. PLAN ZZZ 9. THE PREVARICATIONS OF THE SLAVE AND THE EGOTISM OF THE MASTER 10. WE WILL LEAD HUMANITY TO HAPPINESS WITH AN IRON FIST 11. PENNILESS GHOSTS 12. SUB-HARM 13. SUICIDE GESTURES 14.I WAS KIDNAPPED BY ALIEN ELVIS 15. A RECIPE FOR RAGE 16. TOO MUCH HEROIN MAN 17. DELIBERATE MISTAKE 18. THE WHOLE WORLD BLIND 19. THE TERRIBLE GREAT YEAR 20. PERSONAL IRRESPONSIBILITY 21. DIGITA IMPUDICA 22. ISOLATED REFLECTION INTERVAL 23. THE HAPPY OLD MEN ANTI-MOVEMENT 24. CREATOR, REDEEMER, SUSTAINER...AND MOKEY 25. SCREAMING DELICIOUS NAKED NUANCES 26. A SOMBER ARCADIA 27. THE CUTTING EDGE OF NOSTALGIA 28. WHETTING HERESY 29. TOYS FOR YOUR CAR WORLD 30. WONDERFULLY DEFORMED 31. BLAZEN SLIPPERS 32. APPROPRIATE GROPING 33. IPSA RES SALUTARIS 34. THE THRILL OF CHEAP TRASHY CRAP 35. THE BEST POLICEMAN IS RAIN 36. NOISY DESPERATION 37. GONE WITH THE MIND 38. THE WRETCHED MAJORITY 39. CHARISMATIC MISANTHROPE 40.THE STUFF OF SANITY 41. AT THE SIGN OF THE LAZY GADFLY 42. FRUGAL HAG 43. POINT BLANK 44. THE SLEEP OF COWARDS 45. O2, PART TWO 46. SESSYLU 47. COOPERATIVE SUBMISSIVE ORDER 48. SLAVEZONE 49. YEAH, WELL... 50. STUPID FUN 51. PYGMIES VS. CRANES 52. DEMONS ARE FOREVER 53. AN UNREMITTING TRAVESTY 54. PROLETARIAN UTOPIAS 55. CAROLINE K’S POLITE BRUSH-OFF 56. KAMIKAZE 57. PHILOSOPHICAL LAUGHING 58. CALL ME RESPONSIBLE 59. DROOL BRITTANNIA 60. BLAND PROVINCIALISM 61. AN ORACULAR HERO 62. THE LITTLE RED HOUSE ON THE BORDER 63. PROFITABLE SELF-HATRED 64. CIVIL OBEDIENCE 65. COMMISSION ON LIES AND ENMITY 66. PLAYIN’ THE PONIES FOR JESUS 67. SUPERHUNTER 68. OLD VISIONARIES 69. IS THIS A JOB FOR QUESTION AUTHORITY MAN? MAYBE NOT 70. CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE GRIEVING CHICKEN MOTHER 71. WHY I BOTHER 72. FOOLS WHO HAVEN’T SAID ENOUGH 73. TUNE OUT THE UNEXCITING SCENES FROM OUR NEXT EPISODE 74. DOB IN A DOLE BLUDGER 75. HE IS HONEST...AND HE IS DOOMED #54 1. PETTY INTELLECTUALITIES or 2. BLESSED LOBOTOMY or 3. A JOYLESS MACHINE 4. ARROGANCE, FEEBLENESS, GREED, DEPRAVITY AND DECADENCE, INC. 5. FLOODING THE ZONE 6. SPECIAL MESSENGER 7. THE SUBCONSCIOUS IN ITS BURNING LIQUID STATE 8. AN INTRODUCTION TO WISDOM 9. OLD BABY 10. POWER SANDWICH HERO LUNCH 11. THE WEIGHT OF THE SHAMELESS STONE 12. THE INDIFFERENCE OF A SUPERIOR WEST 13. THE LIBERTY FOR EVERYONE TO BE A MEDIOCRE MAN 14. TV’S TITTERING BUMHOLE GIRL 15. BREAKING UP IS BREAKING DOWN 16. ROBUST FATALISM 17. ETCOM SPIRI 2-2-0 18. IMAGINARY MENACE 19. PROBLEM CONVERGENCE 20. PUTATIVE CRISIS 21. SISSYFOOT ‘N’ NELLY 22. THE INCOHERENT STATE 23. A STABLE MESS 24. LOYA JIRGA 25. AURA OF INDISPENSIBILITY 26. IMAGINARY ENEMIES 27. THIN DESCRIPTION 28. THERE IS NO SELF THAT WILL NOT CRUMBLE 29. UNANSWERABLE APHORISMS 30. THE FULL EXTENT OF OUR IGNORANCE 31. KITTYSAURUS 32. YOUNG AND ALWAYS WRONG 33. KISSING TO BE CHASTE 34. TRUE HALLUCINATION 35. MR. GOODBEER 36. BABY PLEASE SHUT UP 37. THE MISOGYNIST’S BALL 38. 911247 39. STABLE PRECIPICES 40. EXQUISITE ORDINARINESS 41. MOON HEIFERS IN HEAT 42. VIGILANTE OF THE TRIVIAL 44. ROUGH BEAST, INC. 45. INVESTIGATIVE POETICS 46. THE MAN WITH BUTTER IN HIS MOUTH 47. WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO THINK 48. STUFFED RABBITS STUFFED INTO THE MOUTHS OF STUFFED WOLVES 49. LETHAL SUSTAINABLE USE 50. JUST A TALENT TO AMUSE 51. THE HOME OF EVIL LIVERS 52. THE MARK OF DISNEY 53. LITTERA SCRIPTA MANET 54. A DECADENT RASP 55. VANILLA SEX 56. TORMENTED DERISION 57. A LAMENT FOR BROKEN PROMISES 58. MOCKING THE FOLLIES OF GHOSTS 59. THE SET GRIM PATINA OF THESE DIRE TIMES 60. TURGID INTENSITY 61. WE MUCH REGRET THAT YOU WILL HAVE TO DIE 62. FRIVOLOUS LEECHES 63. GRATUITOUSLY INOFFENSIVE 64. A MOVABLE KINGDOM OF LOVE 65. TAEDIUM VITAE 66. PHARMAGEDDON 67. YESH I WILL URP YESH 68. STATE-OF-THE-ART VERBAL MISSILES 69. THE BOOK THEY DARED NOT PRINT, EXCEPT THEY DID 70. MADNESSES’ FIRST COUSIN 71. SARDONIC BURN 72. A HOBO BURNING A SANDWICH BOARD 73. SUPERB FLASHES OF VULGARITY 74. OILY TALES 75. PERCUSSIVE EVENTS #55 1. CONFUSED MUSIC or 2.SOFT POWER or 3. THE UBIQUITY OF MALICE 4. NOT ALL MIDGETS ARE CREATED EQUAL 5. NAIVELY CURIOUS 6. MR. GOODEVIL 7. KILLITERATE 8. HENRY JAMES PLUS MARK TWAIN EQUALS HANK JIM 9. AFRAID NOT TO LOVE THEM 10. NO! I NOW OWN THE COMPANY AND YOU--ARE FIRED!!! HAA!! 11. BLAST NOT THE HOPE THAT FRIENDSHIP HATH CONCEIVED 12. ROVER VS. MOGGY 13. UNACKNOWLEDGED REPETITIONS 14. BRILLIANT BUT STABLE 15. A CLOSE ACCOUNTANT OF SMALL INSULTS 16. PROFOUND SURFACES 17. ALL MY POSSESSIONS FOR A MOMENT OF TIME 18. DISCARDS FROM ELSEWHERE 19. A KIT FOR EXAMINING PARADOXES 20. LIES ABOVE SUSPICION 21. INTERREX FOR A DAY 22. A CITY FILLED WITH BRILLIANCE 23. STEEL TRADITION 24. PUSILLANIMOUS MEDIOCRITY 25. THE TRICK OF REASON 26. CARAPACE OF POSTMODERN KNOWINGNESS 27. WINTER LOVE 28. MATCHBOOK UNIVERSITY 29. JUNIOR POLICE BOY 30. THE KING AND QUEEN OF NOTHING 31. CHAINED FOREVER TO A FIERY CHAIR 32. THREAT INFLATION 33. HIDING TROUBLE 34. SAVAGE WARS OF PEACE 35. FEELINGS OF HOSTILITY SEDULOUSLY CULTIVATED 36. A UNIVERSE WITH NO PLACE FOR YOU 37. A SHABBY CONSPIRACY AMONG MONEY HUSTLERS 38. A POOR MAN’S MAMIE VAN DOREN 39. MR. BABY 40. I CATTAVI MAESTRI 41. HEROIZED BY THE THUNDERBOLT OF ZEUS 42. PROLETARIAN EXPROPRIATIONS 43. THE MILITARIZATION OF AESTHETICS 44. LET THE EAGLE SCREAM! 45. ACTE GRATUIT 46. THE NERVOUS HOSPITAL 47. ALUMINUM RAINBOW 48. CATCHING BILLY BLUE HILL 49. OLEO MAZOLA 50. MISTAKE ISLAND 51. THE CUCKOLD’S PARSLEY GARDEN 52. MORE RELEVANT IN A POSITIVE WAY 53. INSIDE THE HEART OF IT 54. TAMPERING WITH THE BUNKER 55. BARYSHNIKOV STRADDLING A JACKHAMMER 56. STRONG AND WRONG 57. A KITSCHY, ANTIQUE VIEW OF THE FUTURE 58. CHEAP GODS 59. BARMPOT TOWERS 60. A GATED COMMUNITY OF FAILURE 61. THE VALLEY OF THE SHADOW OF BLACKBERRIES 62. JESUSES-PER-MINUTE QUOTA 63. BLACK MASSES FOR DUMMIES 64. HOLD SOME OF YOUR BLESSINGS BACK! 65. HOMEOPATHIC CHRISTIANITY 66. IDIOT’S LANTERN 67. A SIGN SAYING DO NOT READ 68. ORWELL’S SPINNING CORPSE 69. UNCONSCIOUSLY DELIBERATE 70. THIS IS A JOB FOR PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE MAN, THOUGH MAYBE NOT 71. HERMES, P.I. 72. THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A DEAD MAN 73. NEVER AGAIN, PART TWO 74. CRUELTY, SACRIFICE AND ETERNAL TORMENT 75. THE BETTER MANTRAP #56 1. A DRUNKEN HOLIDAY AT GOVERNMENT EXPENSE or 2. A CURIOUS MACHINE OPERATED MAINLY BY BALONEY POWER or 3. GOOD OLE MR. FREE BEER 4. HUNNISH MOCKERS 5. THE CAVE OF ADULLUM 6. KISS-YOUR-SISTER CHAOS 7. THE SAD HERO OF AMERICA 8. THE NOISY VOCABULARY OF RELIGION 9. A YOUNGER GOD KEEPS ROLLIN’ CROSS MY MIND.... 10. TWO FATES AWAY 11. DEAD SEA FRUIT CAKE 12. PAIN BOY 13. DAILY BULL 14. SNIGGERING DOGGIE ROLE MODEL 15. POETMASTER GENERAL 16. IN EXCELSIS DAGO 17. SWAMP HIPPIES 18. THOSE WHO CAN’T, COACH 19.UNDERKILL 20. PERSUASIVE KOOKS 21. THE AEGIS BAG 22. WHO KILLED DICK AND JANE? 23. MY TWISTED CARNY FREAKS 24. P.R. MAN, SPIN BOY AND PUBLICITY HOUND 25. WHY JOHNNY MUST BE SACRIFICED 26. GENERAL FEAR 27. METEMPSYCHOSIS, SANK SAME 28. FROM LATE SUMMER TO THE END OF THE YEAR 29. TERRAPLANE SOUP 30. DON’T CONFUSE ME WITH THE FACTS 31. SPITEFUL GHOSTS 32. DINOSAURS, SLUTS, AND ADULTERERS 33. A TROPHY BRAIN 34. BUCK FEVER, RURAL P.I. 35. THE MAGIC CLOWN 36. BEING JUST CONTAMINATES THE VOID 37. UNLEARN 38. A PIMP MACHINE FOR COMMODITY FETISHISM 39. WHORES ARE THE RECEIPTS TO MAKE A NOVEL 40. ANGER, CRUELTY, GOLD, TERROR AND DEATH 41. THE ASS CULT 42. DON’T LET THE TZARS GET IN YOUR EYES 43. PLEASE DO NOT ABUSE OUR ELDERLY ALCOHOLIC RETAINER 44. OMNIPOTENT CHILD 45. A CESSPOOL OF SUBJECTIVISM 46. COWERING IN THE NORTH WOODS 47. MR. STARCH 48. THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A TEDIOUS BORE 49. THE BOOK OF MYTHS AND OTHER SILLY LIES 50. FACETS OF RAGE 51. PHALLUS OF THE SEA 52. HOW TO OPEN WINDOWS OR BREAK THEM WHEN THEY WON’T OPEN 53. COGITO ERGO SHUT UP 54. ROBOT SLAVES FOR ALL 55. SAVE THE SILVERFISH 56. OMIT DIRECT ARTICLE 57. DRUG ABUSE INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX 58.THE TASTE OF BOOT POLISH 59. HARMLESS DECAY 60. THE MAN WHO CAUGHT FLIES WITH HONEY INSTEAD OF VINEGAR 61. THE SACRED BAND 62. I HATE FICTION 63. GASPING VIRAGO 64. MAY THE DEVIL USE YOU AS AN OBJECT-LESSON IN HELL 65. OOGY WAWA 66. CRAZY BOY SOFAS 67. THE STALE PRINCE OF MAL AIR 68. THE APOTHEOSIS OF ANTI-EVERYTHING 69. KILL UGLY SUPERMAN 70. CUNIEFORMITY 71. UPSTART GODS 72. OMINOUSLY THREATENING THE STATUS QUO 73.MILES FROM A FROZEN SUN 74. GENIUS CHRIST 75. THIS IS A JOB FOR PATCHOULI...MAAN #57 1. PREFABRICATED NONSENSE FOR IDIOTS or 2. A GOOD TITLE or 3. ODDBALL CRAFT 4. GUARD THAT DREAM 5. STATUS DOG 6. THE MARBLE NOTEBOOK 7. CHARMS AGAINST WITHERING WINDS 8. A SATANIC WINDHAM HILL 9. PERSONIFIED PANGS OF CONSCIENCE 10. THE TYRANNY OF ART 11. PUNCTUATED EQUILIBRIA 12. AN IMAGINARY WORLD MUST BE REALISTICALLY EQUIPPED 13. CONFUSION TO THE MINIONS OF ANTI-VICE 14. UNCLE SAM’S LAZY DOGS 15. DURSTIG GEIST 16. UNCORRECTED PERSONALITY TRAITS 17. ONE SUPER CUP OF STRONG WEAK TEA 18. DEATH AVENUE 19. WARRIORS ONLY 20. KING OF THE SILVERFISH 21.DECEIVING GHOSTS BY ALTERING ONES APPEARANCE 22. PEOPLE WHO WRITE FICTION ARE UGLY 23. NONE-CAN-COMPARESVILLE 24. FORUM HOG 25. NEVER AGAIN WORRY 26. MR. JUNK MAN 27. DISTURBING ARCHANGEL 28.CRITICISM IN ACTION 29. IMBECILE EXERCISE 30. MR. I-KNOW-EVERYTHING 31. TV CLICHE MAN VS. THE FOREIGNERS 32. A PLAYBOY MONK 33. RUSTLING WOUNDED LIFE 34. COMMANDER-IN-CHIMP 35. EXQUISITE DEPRAVITY 36. BAD LOGIC, DUMB POLITICS AND SILLY IDEAS 37. BLACK COTTON CANDY 38. IRON-WILLED MONSTROUS MATRIARCH 39. FAT, DUMB AND HAPPY 40. CAREFUL UNDERSTATEMENT 41.YOUTHS, CRONES AND MATRONS 42. I LIKE YOU...AM EVIL 43. A HEADLESS JOHN DOE 44. KILL BEAR 45. 1-800-IAMANUT 46. EUCATASTROPHE 47. FAST CARS, FAT COWS, AND OVERPOPULATION 48. LONG COSTUME PARTIES 49. BOOKS NARRATED BY THE DEAD 50. BLEEDING-EDGE 51.I LOVE I LOVE MY CALENDAR GODS 52. AT WAR WITH THE 21ST CENTURY 53. PILL PAUPERS 54. THE FACE OF THE AMERICAN DREAM 55. KIDS GETTING OLDER YOUNGER 56. I HAVE A GUN SO I KNOW THE RULES 57. HORRENDOUS PERFECTIONISM 58. MY METER HAS DONE FULL CIRCLE 59. BETWEEN WALLET AND SOUL 60. SUB-ZEITGEIST 61.LAKE DEMON 62. SONGS THEY PLAY IN HELL 63. ANACHRONISTIC GIMMICK GAG 64. EGOTISTIC MALICE 65. Q HERE 66. QUIT FOREVER AGAIN 67. SWEET MYOPIA 68. THE INTELLECTUAL ECHO CHAMBER 69. HORSIE, PASS BY 70. SECURE BENEATH THE WATCHFUL EYES 71. DUNG MAN 72. BURN THE POLITENESS 73. TAP-DANCING ON THE EDGE OF MOUNT DOOM 74. SNOOPY CUM LAUDE 75. THE REFLECTION OF THE MOON IN THE CAWN BOSOM OF THE LAKE #58 1. ANHEDONIC CLAPTRAP or 2. COLONIZED MINDS FAR FROM THE LEVER OF POWER or 3. A FARRAGO OF BALDERDASH 4. OUTING THE BEAST 5. WHEN THE FICTION STOPS 6. ENEMY HEROES 7. STALE PIETIES 8. AN INCOMPLETE ASSHOLE 9. DEFENSIVE ASSERTIONS 10.ARISTOCRAT JESUS 11. ZONKED ANOMIE 12.THE LITTLEST KLANSMAN 13. THE STUPIDITY OF MY EPOCH 14. MERCHANT OF SHAME 15. PLACID ANARCHISTS 16. GLOBAL PARTY POOPER 17.OLD HACKS AND RED TAPE BOYS 18. MONEY COMES TO ME NOW 19. BIG CHIEF THORN-IN-SIDE 20. A PATTERN OF PRAISE THAT HAUNTS ME 21. POTTY DAN 22. INTELLECTUAL FREAK SHOW 23. CERTUM EST QUIA IMPOSSIBLE EST 24. PSEUDODELIC 25. HOOSIER DADDY 26.ME PRIDE 27. MANUFACTURED STRANGENESS 28. LIFE I SEE EVERY DAY 29. BOGOSITIES 30. BETWEEN FACILE AND PROFOUND 31. NIGHTS OF PROMISCUOUS REVELS 32. DEHOWLERIZE 33. CLICHED AND PRETENTIOUS BOTH 34. CONSUMMATE TEDIUM 35. THE DEATH OF SNOBBERY 36. LONG MEMORIES OF A SHORT LIFE 37. CULTURAL PULSE 38. A BRACING RETURN TO COMMON SENSE 39. GLIMMERS OF THE RECOGNIZABLE 40. THE VOID OF NONACHIEVEMENT 41. ENEMY OF THE CHRONOS CULT 42. NECESSARY LAMENT 43. A TWANGY CROWD-PLEASER 44. ARCHETYPAL WORKING-CLASS HORRORS 45. SCREWSDALE ACADEMY 46. A TALENT FOR FACING UNPLEASANT FACTS 47. GREAT RAGGED SPLENETIC RIFFS 48. WHAT PEOPLE TALK ABOUT WHEN THEY TALK ABOUT NOTHING 49. QUIBBLE MODE 50. COMMUNISM AS MAD RUSH FOR LAST PLACE 51. PLAYIN’ THOSE MEME GAMES FOREVER 52. AGITATED THOUGHT-FUGUE 53. PLANNED MEDIOCRITY 54. MESSIANIC SUPERWRITER 55. POLYSYLLABIC HERMETICISM 56. MR. PESSIMIST ANTICANT 57. THE PUBLICITY CULTURE 58. DIVERSE PRINCIPLED TEMERITY 59. MEANWHILE BACK AT THE RAUNCH 60. DON’T WALK, THERE’S NOWHERE TO RUN TO 61. EVIL DREAMS 62. A ONE-MAN OPPOSITION 63. PLAYBOY’S CAVE 64. MATERIAL AT HAND 65. RAREFIED THOUGHT EXPERIMENTS 66. YOU CAN TELL FROM THE BLOOD ON MY FACE 67.KING MUTT 68. PICK UP STICKS AND MOVE 69. IDLE YOUNG YOBBOS 70. BITCH AND TWITTER 71.NAMELESS SLAVE 72. MONUMENTAL FOLLY 73. PARALYSIS TICK 74. RESISTIBLE CURRENTS 75. A HUGE EXERCISE IN DEFECTION #59 1. A PRICE WORTH PAYING FOR A CHUCKLE or 2. A ROBOT’S IDEA OF HOME COOKING or 3. FRUSTRATED ENTITLEMENT 4.THINNING OUT THE UNDERCLASS 5. A DEEP BREATH OF THE DOGSHIT AIR 6. THE SILLY CONCEITS OF A POLITICAL PRIG 7. THE OOPS SORRY TECHNIQUE 8. THE SANITY OF HUMAN LIFE 9. MILITANTLY SLOVENLY 10. THE SHAMELESSNESS OF THEIR PUBLIC CONDUCT 11.THE GREAT BLACK BOTTOM 12. POTTY-TRAINING IN REVERSE 13. EMOTIONAL SEPTICAEMIA 14. AN INCESSANT INFLATION OF MODES OF EXPRESSION 15. HISTRIONICS ON A MASS SCALE 16. PARASITES, GRAFTERS AND FUMBLING SLOBS 17.A MUSICAL-COMEDY ADMINISTRATION 18.EYES WIDE OPEN, OPEN EYES DEAD 19. POST-ID NOTES 20. RIGHTEOUS NONSENSE AND AWESOME SELF-PARODY 21. THE DOOMED CORN SPIRIT 22. A BOON TO NIBBLING CREATURES 23. RUMPS, SUMPS, PUMPS AND STUMPS 24. PROPAGANDA MACHINES THAT PAINT COUNTRY IN BAD LIGHT 25. LAZY CLOWN 26.ALARMINGLY TRUE 27.A TIN BOX--A WONDERFUL TIN BOX 28. BRILLIANCE MADE THE SLAVE OF RAGE 29. A POLITICAL MONGREL 30. E FINITA LA CUCCGNA 31.KING OF THE SWAN CULT 32. A SLAVE’S PORTION 33. GRACEFUL MALICE 34. UNLOVELY MUNICIPALITY 35. A NIAGRA OF MOLASSES 36. DIRTY WEEKEND 37. IT’S NOT A BRIBE--CALL IT A FEE 38. THE CORRUPTERS 39. THE SEEMINGLY BOTTOMLESS SUGAR BOWL 40. MONEY HONEST 41.THE FAR NORTHERN OTHER WORLD 42. THE LOCUS OF CORRUPTION 43. INSTANT CAMP 44. DANCING BEARS OF KNOWINGNESS 45.AN ODD MIXTURE OF QUALITIES 46. A SOLID WALL OF SYCOPHANCY 47.AN INSTANT AND CONSTANT CAPACITY FOR INDIGNATION AND URGENCY 48. GREEN HEARTBEAT OF THE ASPHALT CITY 49. A CONCRETE MIND AND A NON-EXISTENT HEART 50. DIFFERENCE PLUS POWER 51. ACTING THE PART OF A GOAT 52. INVOLUNTARY ORAL EMISSIONS 53. REAL INK 54. GREASY EMINENCE 55. EXTREME MALE BRAIN THEORY 56. MALODOROUS THUNK 57. IDIOT’S SORTING OFFICE 58. THE LAND OF LOUSY OPTIONS 59. NECESSARY AFFORDABLE LUXURIES 60. I LOVE DOGGIE 61. THE TWITTERING DEAD 62. RADIANT WITH CHOLESTEROL 63. CELEBRITY ANIMAL FARM 64. IF I WAS 65. FOOLISH ARGUMENTS 66. CRIME TSUNAMI 67.A MONUMENT TO THE INDEFINITE REFERENT 68. THE UPSHOT 69. RECYCLE ME 70. THE IMBECILITIES OF DYING PAST 71. SOME UNGEOGRAPHICAL COUNTRY 72. CAN’T POSSIBLY HOPE 73. A CRAZED BICEPHALOUS BEING 74. THAT CAT IS BAD 75. A SLOPPY BOOK #60 1. FROSTY THE WHITE MAN or 2. DEAR SANTA: I LOVE YOU or 3. A PORNOGRAPHIC XXXMAS 4. AS MUCH FUN AS THROWING COWSHIT AT THE VILLAGE IDIOT 5. PICTURES OF MY DOG ON ST. NICK’S LAP 6. AND JESUS WAS HIS NAME O 7. WAILING MONKEY CLASPING A TREE 8. A WISECRACKING PUBLICITY HOUND 9. YOUTHFUL DREAMS EXCHANGED FOR THE QUOTIDIEN 10. SNIPPY GRIFTERS VS. HAPPY GRAFTERS 11. GOAT MARRIAGE WITH THE TRIBAL QUEEN 12. A LOW MUTTERING THUNDER 13. SYSTEM D 14. BACK TO THE POLYGRAPH 15. THE ROVNO CURFEW 16. A WAY TO TWEAK AND PRESERVE THE SEXY 17. DOG SALMON 18. WITLESS GENIUS 19. SOULLESS VULGARITY 20. OF IMPOVERISHED SORROW AND EARNEST TEARS 21. OUTLANDISH REGIONS 22. A LITTLE BIT OF FUN TO MATCH THE SORROW 23. FEAR THE WINTER BEAR 24. INAUTHENTIC CHILDREN 25. THE GOD OF DISABILITY 26. I’LL SWAMP YOUR GOOD LAND AND I’LL BUY MY LAND 27. BRAKES ARE FOR PEASANTS 28. AN ENTHUSIASTIC IF IMPERFECT SPEAKER OF ENGLISH 29. A STROLL DOWN SINISTER STREET 30. A CORNUCOPIA OF DISREGARDED FACTS 31. TINDER HARLOT ROCK 32. STYLISTIC INFELICITIES 33. VIAGRA FALLS 34. SLOW LIMPID PRECISION 35. SO NOT TRUE 36. HAPPINESS IS CONCIOUSNESS AND CONCIOUSNESS IS ONE 37. YOU CAN BITE MY STIMULUS PACKAGE 38. A BOOMER-FRIENDLY FOG 39. LOST IN THE BUYOSPHERE 40. PERPETUALLY HALF-RIGHT 41. MEN IN BEAST DISGUISES 42. A POLITY OF SUCKERS 43. KILL GRIEF 44. STUPID-VISION 45. ALL HELL 46. REHABILITATING KAFKA 47. THAT’S MR. JIM CROW TO YOU 48. THE TALL MAN IN THE PHOTO 49. THE DUCHENNE SMILE 50. THE VISUAL CHANNEL 51. SERVANTS OF THE DEATH GODDESS 52. THE ORDINARY BOUNDARIES OF HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS 53. VIETNAM AND MARIJUANA 54. THE CHEESE UNDERGROUND 55. A GREAT PIECE OF MISCHIEF 56. IF YOU DON’T WANT THE NUB, DON’T HOLD THE CUB 57. JED’S REVENGE 58. POLITICS UGLIER THAN EVER 59. NEVER MIND THE IRONY 60. WHOLE WORLD BLIND 61. AN ODD NAME FOR A LIBYAN 62. IMAGINATIVE WORK THAT COULD HAVE HELPED DEFINE AMERICA 63. MONGOLS OF THIS AGE 64. SACRED MONSTERS IN STRANGLED AGONY 65. WORLD’S WORST JOKE 66. HE DO THE POLICE IN DIFFERENT VOICES 67. ALIENATED FROM BLACK STREET CULTURE 68. PARADE OF PETIT-BOURGEOIS PREJUDICES 69. SUBMERGED IN A TORRENT OF OCCASIONALLY INVENTIVE VERBIAGE 70. REARRANGING THE MENTAL FURNITURE 71. SERPENT CHARIOT 72. A BOLD DEPARTURE FROM CONVENTIONAL NORMS 73. DEEPLY UNWORTHY MASTER 74. TERRIBLE CATEGORY MISTAKES 75. INSTITUTIONS OF PLANNED IGNORANCE #61 1. SOMETHING LIKE THE TRUTH or 2. A PITILESS HARMFUL GIANT or 3. SURVIVAL OF THE CUTEST 4. SOCCER GRANNIES FOR PEACE 5. MY PAIN IS PUNISHMENT FROM THE LORD 6. GOD’S WORST ENEMY 7. AN AGE ENTHRALLED WITH NEWLY-MINTED CELEBRITIES 8. IF YOU DON’T LIKE THIS SONG THEN FUCK YOU 9. A WIDOWER LEARNS OF GENTLE HEROIN 10. NIGHTMARE WORLD OF GREED AND AMBITION 11. SMOTHERED HATRED 12. A TACTIC OF VACUOUS EXHAUSTION 13. I BELIEVE IN THINGS THAT I DON’T UNDERSTAND AND I SUFFER 14. HIERARCHICALLY APPROVED NOTIONS OF AMBITION 15. U.S.S. 13 WHISTLING PIGS 16. 1337 SPELLING MISTAKES 17. SSSHHH, SPEAK UP 18. RELATIVE MOTION 19. A MEDIA CREATURE 20. NEGATIVE RULES NOT OK 21. THE ANGRY ONE 22. THIS IS AN ASSIGNMENT FOR ARTMAN 23. NATION OF GANGSTERS 24. MENSA CIRCUS 25. BOOOOO...I AM THE GHOOOST... 26. NORMAL MORONS 27. HANGING ANIMAL BASKETS 28. THE CRUEL LOGIC OF PREDATION 29. A MEMORY STOCKED WITH TRASH AND TREASURES 30. IRONIES IN THE FIRE 31. THE ORGIASTIC MOUNTAIN GODDESS 32. WISE-GUY UNILATERALISM 33. GOOGLE DOPPLEGANGER 34. ANTI-AMERICAN STUDIES 35. A CYNOMORPHIC SUBSTITUTE 36. THE WHELPING BOX 37. SERGEANT EVIL 38. TRYING TO HIT THE BROAD SIDE OF A BARD 39. MY FAVORITE THINKER 40. ATOMIC BOMB-SNIFFING DOGS 41. VEXED BY OBDURACY 42. RECONCILABLE SIMILARITIES 43. HARMFUL FUN 44. VEGETABLE OBLIVION 45. FRANTIC DAY 46. THE ADVENTURES OF DOGGIE 47. MIGHT & WRONG COMBINED 48. HOLLOW INTEGRITY 49. UNWARD 50. THE SUCTION OF FATE ITSELF 51. TRUTH I MOURN FOR YOU WHO HAVE PREDECEASED ME 52. BETTER THAN WHATEVER WAS WORSE 53. RIGHTEOUS DANGER 54. ANGER IS MY BUSINESS 55. POP THEOLOGY 56. EVEN THE BRAVE SLEEP HERE 57. LONG LATINIZED WORDS BEREFT OF ACTUAL IMAGES 58. AS NEVER SEEN ON TV 59. EMOTIONAL BRANDING 60. VENN DIAGRAM OF LIFE 61. A PETTY ZEUS 62. INDUSTRIOUS SODS 63. NO-TOOTH YOKELS FROM TRAILER PARKS 64. NE BUVEZ PLUS IDIOT, BUVEZ ENGAGE! 65. GOOFBALL NARCISSISTIC ARPEGGIO 66. A NEW, CUSTOMIZED PROLETARIAT 67. SHITTY TALES 68. DEAR LIFE 69. BARNEY GOGOL 70. DIRTY QUANDRY 71. THIS MAY OR MY NOT BE A JOB FOR IMPARTIAL MAN 72. STEALTH EXCESS 73. A NEAR-TOTAL ABSENCE OF SKEPTICISM 74. THE HUMANIST THOUGHT BOX 75. SITUATION LIFE #62 1.ALAS THE DAYS OF OLD ARE TURNED TO DUST or 2. RECKLESS REGARD FOR THE TRUTH or 3. FERAL SKEPTICISM 4. A CERTAIN PARANOID PERFECTION 5. GOUGING PUBLIC OPINION 6. AMERICA’S MOST DISTINGUISHED PEST 7. GOD’S CLONE 8. INVULNERABLE NOTHINGS 9. SOFT DEGREES 10. MY LOST SAINTS 11. VICIOUS DEITIES 12. DARK WORLD AND WIDE 13. HIDEOUSLY SERENE 14. THIS BE A JOB FOR POETRY MAN 15. UNKNOWN JOYS 16. AN HUMBLER HEAVEN 17. GOOD ENOUGH FOR A MAN LIKE FURY 18. FATDOG MCWOOF 19. SERMONS ON A KEYWORD 20. UNKNOWN UNKNOWNS 21. MYSTIGOGUES 22. THROBBING NEWS URGENCY 23. BODENLOSIGHEIT 24. GRATUITOUS INVOCATIONS OF GOD 25. FROZEN HYMNS 26. I’M GOING TO BE HEALTHY IF IT KILLS ME 27. 5 FOOT WORM 28. ANTI-COOL AVATARS 29. HAGGIE AND MOPEY 30. IT’S A WONDERFUL LIE 32. ACCOMMODATE ME 33. SECOND SIGHT MEANS TRAGEDY TO A VISIONARY 34. PRE-LITERATE DIGEST 35. HUMOR IN CUNEIFORM 36. THE MUJIK MAN 37. ROAD BULLIES 38. IN GRANDMA’S TIME 39. RASTA WINO AND THE YANKEE DOODLE MAN 40. REGURGITATED CLICHES 41. BRONZE AGE HEROES OF HONEST REPUTE 42. ATOMIC MULE 43. NEW COSMIC STRUCTURES 44. DISORDERS IN THE GODHEAD 45. THE WHORES OF PEACE 46. PRO-MEAT 47. MULTILEVEL BLAST 48. WORSE THAN STUPID 49. ODIOUS TRENDS 50. MISERY PILLS 51. GIRLS IN BIRD DISGUISE 52. TRUE TALE TO TELL 53. CLEARER THAN TRUTH 54. I AWOKE, AND BEHOLD IT WAS A DREAM 55. STEALING RULES FROM JESUS 56. A REBEL IN UTOPIA 57. BEDLAM PARK 58. SELF-ESTEEM FOR STUPID FUCKING IDIOTS 59. UNIT 731 60. IT’S FOR YOU, GOODIE 61. ROT MODELS 62. MADDISH 63. HOLY WATER SOUP 64. CULPRIT OF THE SOCIETY 65. HORTATORY SUBJUNCTIVE 66. EVIDENCE OF ABSENCE 67. FORGET TRUTH 68. PUBLIC FLEXING EXERCISE 69. ANXIETY BONANZA 70. WHERE KINGS HAVE ALWAYS STOOD 71. THE PALLADIUM INCIDENT 72. JUDGE CARPENTER 73. REPRESENT CHAOS 74. THE BAD HAIR YEARS 75. A DAISY IN A CYCLONE #63 #64 1. SIESTA NIGHTMARES or 2. HARD-BOILED HISTORY or 3. THE CULT OF BAD IDEAS 4. PEACEBANE 5. FRANKENSPAWN 6. DEAN OF SANITY 7. THE ANGLOSPHERE 8. GLOBAL BROTHEL 9. VAGUELY REALIZING WESTWARD 10. WHITE MEN IN THIN TIES 11. A HARROWING OF HELL 12. APOCALYPTIC PURITY DESIRE 13. A COMPLETELY COMPETENT INTERLOCUTOR 14. ADORABLE PUPPIES 15. STRIP-MALL CULTURE 16. TRIPPING FROM POTSVILLE TO MAINLINE 17. A CATALOG OF ENDED MODES OF BEING 18. WHY I AM NOT A MUSICIAN 19. VELVET CONSERVATISM 20. TREASONOUS MORON 21. A LONG LYING TALE 22. RECEDING SKYLINE 23. OH... 24. SEMIOTICALLY AROUSED 25. THE DESTROYER OF DREAMWORLDS 26. GRANDIOSITY’S OPPOSING FORCE 27. A DEATH CULT AT THE HEART OF THE UNITED STATES ESTABLISHMENT 28. KOOKY THEORIES, GROSS IRRESPONSIBILITY, & SHADY RHETORIC 29. FALSE HISTORY PLAY 30. NATURAL CAUSES 31. RESPECTED AND GARRULOUS NESTOR 32. DIRECTORATE OF PARANOIA 33. RES NULLIUS 34. THE UNITED WA STATE ARMY 35. NOW NEWS 36. THE COIN OF ANY CORRUPT REALM 37. ALL BAD WRITING STEMS FOM FEAR 38. MYSTERY OFFENCE 39. THE AMERICAN NARRATIVE 40. SCHOOLS FOR FANATICISM 41. 112 INSOLENT PRINCES 42. ONLY 99% 43. ANOTHER BLOW FOR OUR FALTERING DEMOCRACY 44. GENERALIZED DECAY 45. THE NIHILIST TEMPTATION 46. A WAVE OF RISING SPIRITUAL DESERTIFICATION 47. PROGRESS TOWARD A CONSTANTLY DEEPENING ABYSS 48. CIVILIZATION LITE 49. SACROSANCT TYRANNY OF FRIVOLITY 50. DRUNK ON ENTERTAINING LIES 51. STURDY BEGGARS 52. AUGE UM AUGE 53. SINS IN THE NAME OF FAITH 54. DECEPTIVE BLANKETS 55. TANGO EFFECT 56. CINCINNATI FRANKLIN 57. THE MASTER OF GHOSTS 58. INSOLENT CANDOR 59. VAST UNSPEAKABLE SHOW & LESSON 60. YALLA! 61. SPARE THE HERALD AND THE BARD 62. IF YOU LIKE DEAD COME TO HERE 63. A WAREHOUSE OF EXQUISITE EPIPHANIES 64. SLIDING INTO XENOPHOBIA 65. A NAIL STUCK IN THE FLOW OF HISTORY 66. THE RICH ALSO CRY 67. PECULIARITIES OF NATIONAL FISHING 68. VERY EFFECTIVE WEAPONS IN A CULTURAL WAR 69. FABRICATING A RHETORICAL FOIL 70. HOGARTH’S ALLEY 71. PRIMITIVE SPRING ORGIES 72. BACK DOOR BEAUTY? 73. THE WIZARD OF OZYMANDIUS 74. A THEME & VARIATION FROM START TO FINISH 75. ALLERGIC TO A CLEAR VISION OF THINGS #65 1. THE CUTEST THING THE PRESIDENT EVER DID or 2. FLAK MACHINES or 3. TRANSPARENT RADIATION 4. IAGO HIGH SCHOOL 5. THE NATURAL ENEMY 6. MALL STOMP 7. IS THIS VERILY A JOB FOR AGENBITE OF INWIT MAN? 8. 36 YEARS FROM NOW 9. FIRESIDE 10. PRESIDENT KING 11. FARDA 12. NO BETTER ENEMY, NO WORSE FRIEND 13. HAPPY NEGLECT 14. GOD'S ERRORS 15. WEAPONS OF MOUSE DESTRUCTION 16. NOT BAD FOR AN OOK 17. A NOBODY WHO COMES IN AT THE BEGINNING AND CAUSES CHAOS 18. ANGER WAVES 19. LANGUAGE GAMES 20. VIA NEGATIVA 21. MICKEY GHOST 22. THE CHOCOLATE PROJECT 23. MY AUTOMATIC RIFLE DANCE 24. THE PLEASURE SQUAD 25. HAPPY FIRE 26. THE DEVIL'S PARADISE 27. DOG OF KNOWLEDGE 28. POSES PLASTIQUE 29. DAFT MANIPULATION 30. MR. BOY 31.THE JAGGED EDGE OF A GANGRENOUS SOUL 32. A GOOD TIME FOR NOTHING 33. AMERICA'S DISGRACED BOSSES 34. POST FACTUM STULTIS COGNOSCIT 35. CHARGE THE EARTH 36. AND CLONEY MAKES THREE 37. A GRIM APPRECIATION OF THE RANDOMNESS OF EVERYTHING 38. AGGRESSIVELY CRASS 39. ARBITRARY UPLIFT 40. A LOTTA LOTTA WORK 41. LIKE THE HERALD MERCURY 42. THE ZERO-ONENESS OF THE WORLD 43. SIMPLE THINGS ARE STRANGE 44. PROFESSIONAL FAINTHEARTS 45. YOU MAY ANSWER WITH A WISECRACK 46. SELF-SERVING INCONSISTENCIES 47. CONTORTIONS OF THE MALCONTENT INTELLECTUAL 48. UNAIRED THOUGHTS 49. HARMLESS LITTLE MEN 50. WHAT I DIDN'T DO THE DAY I DIED 51. THEN WE GO ON 52. SO FAR SO EARLY SO SOON 53. EVIL VIRTUECRAT 54. RUDENESS OF A MERCIFUL STREAM 55. BENEFICIAL PRODUCT ANTAGONISTS 56. I WAS ON DRUGS 57. BENEFICIAL, TRUE; DETRIMENTAL, FICTION 58. THE BLESSEDNESS OF BEING LITTLE 59. SERIOUS LIBELS ON PERSONS STILL LIVING 60. SOCIETY FOR THE PREVENTION OF THOUGHTFULNESS 61. ANAGNOISIS 62. IHATEGOOGLE.COM 63. WEARING DOWN THE PROUD 64. EVERY BIT THE IMAGE OF AN OILY PONCE 65. ULTIMATE DADROCK 66. GWB STILL AT LARGE 67. MEDIEVAL REVERBERATIONS 68. INSOLENT EASE 69. TOO MUCH LSD MAN 70. LEGION OF ASSEMBLERS 71. OPTOR! 72. GRIPPED BY A MASSIVE CALM 73. NOW THIS 74.THE TIDE OF POMP THAT GLITTERS UPON THE HIGH SHORE OF THIS WORLD 75. A LIFE? #66 #67 1. DREADFUL KITSCH RULES OK or 2. THE DOG, THE PARROT, THE ROBOT, THE CHIMP, AND THE INVALID 3. SEASON OF MUD 4. A WORTHLES STUDY 5. SHORT, DECLARATIVE, ONE-SENTENCE PARAGRAPH 6. GLOOMY POETRY 7. DON CHLORINE 8. VAGINA BAY 9. NO-RISK CLOWN 10. YOGA BORE 11. MONKEYS ON DOPE 12. A DIFFERENT SET OF SLOGANS 13. AN UPBEAT TRAGEDY 14. DEMOCRACY CAVED 15. A SMALL STAIN ON THE DOOMSDAY MACHINE 16. UNITED STATES OF OZYMANDIUS 17. RANT CONTROL 18. FREEDOM IN SECLUDED ROOMS 19. A MOB OF FASHIONABLY DRESSED SPECTATORS AND VULGARIANS 20. A FUNERAL PYRE FOR EMPIRE 21. THE OMERTA CHANNEL 22. THROWING PEBBLES AT A CHARGING RHINOCEROUS 23. THE TIME OF THE KAMIKAZI 24. UNHAPPY POLAND 25. ONCE-COMPLACENT OVERLORDS 26. HOPE IN NEW WEAPONS 27. REPETITIVE ORATORY 28. THE COWARDLY REMNANT 29. GRIM-LOOKING INFANT 30. HOT NOISE 31. OMINOUS MASSES 32. A LONG HARVEST OF BITTERNESS RIPE FOR THE REAPING 33. SHALLOW AND FULL OF ATTITUDE 34. WHIMPERING SHADOWS 35. STRAIGHT SEX 36. PICKLED PUNKS 37. A FREE PASS TO HELL 38. GENGHIS KHAN WITH THE INTERNET 39. SHE LOVES ME NOT 40. MAD AGENTS OF THE BOURGEOISIE 41. YOUR DOG: KEY TO YOUR CHARACTER 42. A THOUSAND STALINS 43. A MISERABLE SPECIMEN OF WRECKED HUMANITY 44. HOOLIGAN REPRESENTATIONS 45. IRRESPONSIBLE FABRICATIONS 46. HOPEFUL ALCOHOLIC 47. DELICIOUSLY INFANTILE FANTASIES OF DESTRUCTION 48. SECRET LIFE OF SOCIALISTS 49. COARSE JOLLITY WITH TERRIFIED TOADIES 50. TODAY IS NOT MY DAY BUT YET I LIVE 51. GOD HAUNTED GHOSTS ON A STREET OF NO RETURN 52. A GOOD DOG WILL HUNT UNTIL HIS HEART EXPLODES 53. A FRIVOLOUS ALTERNATIVE 54. DRUGSTORE POLITICS 55. DANCE WITH THE DEVIL WHAT BRUNG YA 56. THE EXHAUSTED ISLE 57. THE DEVIL IS NOT ALWAYS ASLEEP 58. THE JERRY QUERULOUS SHOW 59. A WHOLE HEAP OF MISCHIEVOUS NONSENSE 60. DUCK QUIXOTE AND SANCHO POSSUM 61. TEXTBOOK EMO 62. WARLOCKS & HUMBUGS 63. DUMBSTONE 64. HUAH 65. I COULD HAVE PUT IT BETTER MYSELF 66. ABOVE RESPECTABLITY 67. DANDY’S INFERNO 68. THE UNIVERSITY OF BAD TASTE 69. MY BLUBBER MY LOVE 70. A RAID UPON PREDICTABILITY 71. SIR JAMES CRACKCORN 72. THE LOVE INTEREST 73. OSTRICH POLICY 74. A ROCK IN A WEARY LAND 75. SCORN AS IDENTITY #68 1. SLAVE TAPES or 2. PARVA LEVES CAPIUNT ANIMAS or 3. A TYRANNY OF MAJORITY VALUES 4. THE LAME LOVER 5. THE READING WORLD 6. STAGGER LEE, WORLD’S RICHEST MAN 7. DISTINCTIVELY HARSH 8. PIMPING IRON 9. HULKLESS HANDWRINGING 10. ASK DR. SEX 11. THE SOCIALLY IRRESPONSIBLE NOVEL 12. CHURCH OF GOOGLE 13. THE ACTING-OUT BOYS 14. WESTWARD LOOK THE LAND IS BRIGHT 15. MARX DOLLARS 16. OH SHAYS CAN YOU SEE 17. HERITAGE TONICS 18. CAUGHT OUT AT SEA IN A WIND GROWN WILD WITH ADULT PAIN 19. COUSIN SERIOUS 20. THE LAPDOG TREATMENT 21. FINDING DEMO 22. THE NEW SAD THING 23. FUCKED-UP FRIDAY 24. LAME-DUCKLING 25. GTDRHOY LRWPZAC 26. LAUGHING JURIES 27. MARATHON MENTALITY 28. MI GORDITA 29. A DETAIL OF HISTORY 30. PLUS ANGLAIS QUE LES ANGLAIS 31. GUNFIGHT AT THE LOUSY CORRAL 32. THE RAMBLINGS OF A DISEASED MIND AND SOUL 33. BENIGN COOTERIZATION 34. FLAGSHIP THEATRE OF THE ABSURD 35. TRENDS OF THE MATRIARCHY 36. AVATAR OF THE ANTI?TREND 37. DISPOSABLE AUTOMATICS 38. MITIGATED TRIUMPH 39. AN IMPOSSIBLE DREAM OF PERFECTION 40. THE GREED FOR PARTICULARITIES 41. GOVERNMENT HEALTH WARNINGS MAY CAUSE CANCER 42. BLSD R MEEK 43. FOOLED WITH HOPE 44. A CHIMP OFF THE OLD BLOCK 45. SHOW ME THE RED CARD NOW 46. MUSICO?INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX 47. LITTLE SODIUM 48. RADICAL RADICALISM 49. A NATION OF SUPERENERGIZED DRUNK PIMPS 50. VINNIE VINEGAR 51. FRAGMENT JUNKIES 52. THE FAT SIDE OF THE ROOM 53. IL BRUTO 54. INTELLECTUAL FLIP-FLOPPERY 55. HEALING PERSPECTIVES 56. BREAKFAST WITH KING JESUS 57. A CONCATENATION OF PSEUDOSCANDALS 58. INARTICULATE AGONY 59. IDIOT STUFF 60. NAKED MCNUDE 61. EVERYDAY PSYCHIC DISARRAY 62. IMPOSING TRAGIC CHAOS ON COSMIC ORDER 63. A MORAL CIRCUS 64. THE MAN WHO LOVED KIPLING 65. SUICIDE SORORITY 66. HIRELING OR SLAVE 67. JIMBER?JAWED RAMSQUATTED SCROUGER 68. HAPLESS ACCUMULATION OF FAILURES 69. A THESAURUS OF ANGER 70. CREAM OF 1950 71. MOON BLOCK 72. ROBOT WARS 73. THE LURE OF SURVEILLANCE 74. APPOINTMENT WITH SINATRA 75. AN AMALGAM OF PAROCHIAL INTERESTS #69 1. THE MORALS OF GOATS, THE LEARNING OF GORILLAS or 2. MY HAND FOR WAR MY FINGERS FOR BATTLE or 3. A SHRIEKING CACOPHONY OF HEARTFELT SENTIMENT 4. A SELFISH INSISTENCE ON BEING FORGIVEN 5. FULL FRONTAL INSIPIDITY 6. FALLING ASLEEP IN GOD’S HAND 7. MINOR HUMILIATION 8. MASS BOHEMIA 9. A SYMPTOM OF OUR CAGE 10. STRANGE, OUTSPOKEN PARROT 11. DOGS WITH SENSITIVE STOMACHS 12. ARTINE 13. DANGEROUS DEVIATIONS 14. I HATE CATS…WHEN YOU’RE FUCKIN’ 15. EIGHT RULES FOR RAPING MY TEENAGE DAUGHTER 16. THIS MASTERPIECE DESERVES YOUR ATTENTION 17. IDEOLOGICAL CLASSIFICATIONS EMBODIED IN ORGANIZATIONAL FORMS 18. SLUM MUSIC 19. THE KINGDOM OF THE SOLIPSISTIC CROWD 20. CORPULENCE, SHIFTINESS, AND DEFENSIVE IRONY 21. SILHOUETTES AGAINST THE SKY OF TIME 22. EAT THE RICH RABBIT 23. BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPHY IS WEIRD 24. INTELLECTUAL INCURIOUSITY 25. THE HUNGRY SIDE OF TOWN 26. CHEERFULLY TORPID 27. GOOFY TRIPE 28. THE INVISIBILITY OF PERFECT ACCEPTANCE 29. STALIN’S BULLET LIST 30. KING FUDGE 31. FAUX MOSEXUALITY 32. A TRAGEDY IN SLOW MOTION 33. EMPIRE LITE 34. MEAT BOY 35. HOW BLIND CAN AN ANIMAL BE? 36. COLD FRIENDS 37. ALLERGY MOMS 38. MYSTERIOUS MOANINGS FROM THE DEEP WHICH THE HEAVENS HEAR 39. THE DISMAL CHANCES OF THE SWORD 40. USEFUL INFORMATION FOR THE MAN FROM MARS 41. DAFT MOGGY 42. THE PHANTASMAGORIA OF FUN 43. THE STUPOR OF AN AGED SHEEP 44. THE MARBLE LOVER OF LIBERTY 45. HIPPIEHEAD AND SNACKY 46. FOAM BETTER THAN MIASMA 47. MODERN TREASONS 48. LOFTY SWINDLES 49. A DIABOLIC BEAUTY OF MIND 50. CELEBRITY TROUBLEMAKER 51. REVOLUTION JR. 52. THE CODE OF BUMS 53. AN OUTNUMBERED MAJORITY 54. HOLIDAYS IN THE FIGHT AGAINST EVIL 55. A FOOL IN SOMEBODY ELSE’S DREAM 56. A HAPPY SLOB 57. A SNOWMAN BUILT OUT OF LIES 58. A TERMINOLOGICAL INEXACTITUDE 59. THE WORLD’S BEST LIE 60. NOT GOING TO KILL...TODAY! 61. EVERYTHING IS FUN 62. DON’T MAKE A FAT MAN CRY 63. EVERY POSSIBLE HUMAN MISERY 64. THE SURFACES OF CIVILIZATION 65. THE DUMB WARS OF MAN WITH MAN 66. THE SUBTERRANEAN REACTIONS OF THE LAW 67. THE SHUDDERINGS OF THE MULTITUDE 68. THOSE WHO BLEED AND THOSE WHO STRIKE 69. WORD MASKS AND METAPHOR RAGS 70. INDESCRIBABLY FANTASTIC BEASTLINESS 71. APALLING TOAD LANGUAGE 72. EAST VILLAGE IDIOT 73. PUNISHMENT EVERYWHERE 74. GOD, JR. 75. THE FLAME IS HOSTILE TO THE WING #70 1. PRESIDENT SUGAR or 2. THE LANGAUGE OF THE DARK or 3. SINISTER FOLIAGE 4. THE IDEAL ARMED WITH THE SOUL 5. THE MADMEN OF MODERATION 6. THE BROAD NOONDAY OF THE MISERABLE 7. LIBERTY GROWN MAD 8. DREARY MASTERPIECES OF IGNORANCE 9. LANGUAGE TURNED CONVICT 10. A MENACING FRATERNIZATION OF ALL RUBBISH 11. THE FLAMING REVERBERATION OF THE APOCALYPSE 12. THE WISDOM OF A COWARD 13. THE REVISED AND CORRECTED PROOF OF CREATION 14. MAGNIFICENT EGOTISTS OF THE INFINITE 15. THE GREAT SILENCE OF HAPPY NATURE 16. AN OWL COMPELLED TO AN EAGLE’S GAZE 17. THE REFLECTION OF A FORBIDDEN PARADISE 18. ADORABLE AMBUSCADES OF PROVIDENCE 19. THE SUBLIMITY OF ABJECTNESS 20. SQUEAKY HEE-HAWS 21.TOWN OF ANON 22. SHOOTING A FLOWER 23. IDIOT’S WORKSHOP 24. THE STRAIGHT GRIFFIN 25. SOFT LABOR FOR LIFE 26. PERMANENT WAY 27. BLACK-COAT JOB 28. FACE FLANNEL 29. THE ELECTRIC TORCH 30. CRAZY DETAILS 31. THE TEMPORARY GUEST 32. THE IRON MONGER 33. MR. MONKEYNUT 34. HUZZAH FOR THE BIG LOAF 35. BIFF THE BLOKE 36. BEYOND THE NEXT TURNING 37. THE NEVER-NEVER COUNTRY 38. TINNED DOG 39. M.D. ESQ. 40. SQUEALING AND SNORTING WHILE EATING 41. DON’T POKE BORAX AT ME 42. I’VE DONE MY DASH 43. TENAKOE! 44. BLUE RUIN 45. CINCINNATI OYSTERS 46. DEVIL DODGER 47. REBEL PICNIC 48. NEW CHUM 49. DOXOLOGY WORKS 50. PATIENT RAGE 51. A TEAR IN THE EYE OF THE LAW 52. IDIOTOPIA 53. A CRACKING IN THE IMMUTABLE 54. RIVER DEEP, MOUNTAIN HIGH 55. THINGS WE SHOULD NOT UNDERTAKE TO PAINT 56. MORON'S GIRLFRIEND 57. YOU NEED A HOME TO WEAR YOU DOWN 58. NASTY NEATNESS 59. DEATH IS A GOOD ARRANGEMENT 60. BIG TWANG AND DING 61. SLY GROG 62. A HEART DOES WANT A BONE TO GNAW 63. NO RIGHT TO CONTINUE FOREVER 64. WHO LOVES WELL LASHES WELL 65.MOURNFUL SALIVA 66. THE DARK HORIZON 67.GOD, UNLIMITED 68. THE ONLY REALLY INTERESTING MOVEMENT 69. NEBULOUS POOP 70. I LOVE MAIL ORDER BRIDES 71. MY CHESS MATCH 72. A WOMAN, A VAMPIRE AND A WEREWOLF 73. OLD SUFFERING 74. CONTEMPORARY INSANITY 75. ALOHA, SUCKERS #71 1. IDIOTIC AND ASININE BUT THE KIDS LOVE IT 2. NOT NECESSARILY THE CONSTITUTION 3. SCRAPS OF USELESS INFORMATION 4. WHAT IS THE QUESTION TO WHICH THIS IS THE ANSWER? 5. ZIG ZAGGING THROUGH HISTORY LIKE A DRUNK 6. VITAMINS WITH EXTRA IRONY 7. THE UNBEARABLE SADNESS OF FUNNYMAN 8. HIJACKED BY DRUGS 9. PASS THE SICK BAG, DINKY 10. A STONE DEAD RIGAMAROLE 11. FOCOS INSALUBRES 12. THE LOW COMEDY OF A SELF DECEIVING BOONDOGGLE 13. FLOODING THE EVERYDAY WITH THE UNKNOWN 14. CONFIRMATORY OF PUBLIC BELIEF 15. BADFORD 16. L’IL TORY 17. CAREFULL AUTO REPAIR 18. ARMPIT SLICKS 19. COWBOY BOOTS, SPORTS CARS AND TOUPEES 20. HOMICIDAL DETECTIVE 21. PARVA LEVES CAPIUNT ANIMAS 22. ENVIRONMENTAL ILLNESS 23. THE DECENCY GAP 24. EARTH IS YOUR ONLY COMPETITION 25. FAT BURNS AND SARAH ZONE 26. 100 LITTLE BLUES 27. DR. GOD 28. LAVARSI NA PETRA DE LA SCARPA 29. BALD BARBER 30. HE MEANT WELL 31. BIBLE CELEBRITIES 32. KNOWN MINIONS 33. GENERIC BOOK REVIEW 34. DRUMROLL OF SLAUGHTER 35. THE SALE OF THE NANOSECOND 36. CRISPY PUPPY 37. LAIRS OF VOMIT AND SCABBY DOGS 38. THE CHIAROSCURO OF THE SLUMS 39. A RELATIVELY CLEAN SEMANTIC ENVIRONMENT 40. CRASS IDIOCIES 41. THE MORTIFICATION OF NORMAL REACTIONS 42. BECAUSE I WAS WEAK 43. ELECTRIC JUSTICE 44. INTENDED CONSEQUENCES OF A GRAND TYRANNICAL DESIGN 45. A FARAGO OF CODSWOLLOP 46. 13 LUCKY STORIES 47. MR. INDIFFERENTBAR 48. ENTRALLED BY LOW EXPECTATIONS 49. GHOSTS IN SAUCY PHOTOS 50. PERP SCHOLS 51. MEMORIES OF ANYTOWN 52. EXHIBITIONALIST SUBTLETY 53. A STARING CONTEST WITH DEATH 54. POPULAR POPULARITY 55. THE MADNESS OF KING BUMSTEAD 56. SIR LACKEY 57. VAMPIRE DETECTIVE 58. HOUSE, AUTEUR, STAR, F/X 59. SUPERMONEY 60. NICE IS STUPID 61. DOPE SLAP 62. LEARN AT THE FEET OF THE MASTER 63. ALIENI NIL A ME HUMANUM PUTO 64. THE DEAD FOOD MOVEMENT 65. BUCK FUSH 66. UNEXPECTED VECTORS 67. THE SALIVATION ARMY 68.DOSTOYEVSKYLAND 69. THE SADDEST BOOK NEVER WRITTEN 70. MOTIVELESS TRUCULENCE 71. FAT COIN 72. RURAL MYTH 73. INFAMOUS FOR ALL THE RIGHT REASONS 74. NEVER MIND THAT 75. NIKI! #72 1. A DREADFUL FEAR OF SANTA CLAUS 2. WOLFIE’S IN HIS DEN AND ALL’S RIGHT WITH THE PACK 3. DOPE SLAP 4. PRAISE THE LOOT 5. IDIOTIC AND ASININE BUT THE KIDS LOVE IT 6. NONBOOKS FOR NONREADERS 7. NEVER A WORD 8. THE KIND ROBOTS 9. PASS THE SICK BAG, DINKY 10. BECAUSE I WAS WEAK 11. WHAT TO GET FOR THE MAN WHO HAS NOTHING 12. OLD CHILDREN 13. MR. INDIFFERENTBAR 14. NIKI! 15. GHOSTS IN SAUCY PHOTOS 16. 13 LUCKY STORIES 17. WHAT THE WHOLE STORY IS ABOUT 18. DEATH, DRUGS, DIVORCE, DISASTER 19. NEVER MIND THAT 20. LAIRS OF VOMIT AND SCABBY DOGS 21. THE LAZY DETECTIVE 22. LOSERS AMONG THE LOST 23. ALL VODKA, ALL THE TIME 24. GUIDE TO MUTUAL FUN 25. GENERIC BOOK REVIEW 26. BADFORD 27. KING GOD 28. DR. MONKEY 29. I SHOULD HAVE NEVER LEARNED TO READ 30. FOCOS INSALUBRES 31. PLUNDER FROM ABOVE 32. MAKE SPAMMERS PAY YOU 33. COMPETENT LAMENESS 34. WHAT IS THE QUESTION TO WHICH THIS IS THE ANSWER? 35. NONE HAPPY 36. THREE KIDS AND A NYA NYA 37. YIM MEE LESSONOI 38. WRING THE NECK OF THE SWAN 39. A HACK’S PROP 40. TWO WORD TITLE 41. CAREFULL AUTO REPAIR 42. ARMPIT SLICKS 43. FAT BURNS AND SARAH ZONE 44. WHERE THE BEEF IS 45. 100 LITTLE BLUES 46. THE BIDDEN TRUTH 47. I TELL A STORY IN WHICH I SAY SHE DOES STUFF 48. NOTHING MAKES ME MADDER 49. MORE MISERABLES 50. STANDARDS ALWAYS FALL 51.YAMA NASHI, OCHI NASHI, IMI NASHI 52. DEMAND TRUST 53. DON’T CALL ME AUTISTIC! 54. UNHEARD IN HIS OWN LAND 55. BALD BARBER 56. DARK MATTERS THAT SHOULD DEMAND OUR ATTENTION 57. THE SAFE LIVES OF THE MIDDLE CLASSES 58. CRISPY PUPPY 59. SCRAPS OF USELESS INFORMATION 60. ROBOT EMOTIONS 61. AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF MY SHADOW 62. THE SKIN OF TRUTH 63. MORE FUN THAN FUN 64. MALICIOUS CODE 65. SELF AMUSED 66. A TYRANNY OF SMALL DECISIONS 67. A PROFESSIONAL FREAK IS MANNA FROM HEAVEN 68. A LOBOTOMY ON THE INSTALLMENT PLAN 69. MEMORIES OF ANYTOWN 70. JUNG OF THE JUNGLE 71. HOUSE, AUTEUR, STAR, F/X 72. THE LITTLE I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT 73. SCHOOL OF DRECK 74. IMITATION OF LAFFS 75. THE INTERSECTION OF ART AND TRASH #73 1. BIG CHUNKS FROM THE MIDGET’S HIGH CHAIR 2. HAPPY HAG 3. TALKY TALKY WORD MAN 4. SAINT DRUNK 5. HOBO DETECTIVE 6. DR. FAT 7. RIGHT WING LOVE RADIO 8. UNCLE BENZEDRINE’S ALERTED RICE 9. EMPIRES ANONYMOUS 10. SELF MANUFACTURED PEDESTALS 11. COME HERE, I LOVE YOU, I’M SORRY, WANNA GO BACK 12. PAIDEUMA 13. DR. JERKOFF AND MR. HIGH 14. HELP YOUR ENEMIES 15. A FAIRLY TERRIBLE BOOK 16. REALTIME BLACKLIST 17. PSYCHO FIEND 18. DEFY THE GIPPER 19. MANIZING 20. INSPIRATIONAL SPORTS 21. GOSUDARTVENNOST 22. KAMPF GRENADA 23. FRODO IN NEW ORLEANS 24. A PERVERSE UTOPIA 25. RIP VAN BILLY YANK 26. TRUTH CANYON 27. ME GOD 28. HITLER BEER 29. RED CURMUDGEON 30. STRAIN 121 31. VESTICULUS BALNEARUS BIKINIANA 32. RIDIN’ DOWN CHICAGO LINE 33. TAWDRY SINCERITY 34. ABDICATE IN FAVOR OF THE IMAGE 35. THE LOST PERFORMATIVE 36. THE DYNAMO AND THE CROSS 37. THE DEAD FOOD MOVEMENT 38. WORST WINTER EVER WAS 39. HOUSE O GOOD EATS DINOR 40. PICKLES & BEAVER 41. CLOWN ATROCITY 42. THE REVENGE STORE 43. THE ZEN BRIGADE 44. MY SEX LIFE: NASTY, BRUTAL AND SHORT 45. LES SOIXANTE HUIXARDS 46. DUHH LABELS ARE FOR JARS 47. I LIKE ART THAT ISN’T RUE 48. TAKIYA 49. CONSUMERISMO 50. INDEPENDENTLY FOOLISH 51. ANACHRONISTIC OPPORTUNIZING 52. VICTIM BUDDY 53. HE MEANT WELL 54. GET OUT OF HERE, YOU DEMONS! 55. THE WORLD OF MEAT 56. BEBE DE ESTO Y YO SOY LO TUYO 57. SPAM MAGAZINE 58. MY APOLOGY AND OTHER EXCUSES 59. COOL FACED MEN 60. TE ACCOMPANO EN TU PESAR 61. A QUALITY OF LEGEND 62. THE IMPORTANT UNPROFITABLE DUTY 63. GROTESQUE PEP RALLY 64. DEMON RUM, PC LIQUOR STORE 65. HIP OXYMORON 66. A BOHEMIAN’S REVENGE 67. HOUSEHOUSEHOUSE OFOFOF LSDLSDLSD 68. DREARY GIRLY NOVEL 69. THAT IS ESSENTIAL WHICH IS NOT 70. VINDICTIVE ANTIPATHY 71. THE ARCHITECTURE OF DEGRADATION 72. A HABIT OF GOODNESS 73. SATAN HIMSELF WOULD ULTIMATELY BE REDEEMED 74. JOHNNY CASH NEXUS 75. PTAKI #74 1. VAMPIRE DETECTIVE 2. SMART LAWYER, ESQ. 3. GUARANTEED FAILURE 4. CANCEL THE NEWS 5. POOR PEOPLE BORE ME 6. UNDERSTANDING THE HUMAN CONDITION: A NOVEL 7. 11:53PM: THE BIRTH OF WRITING 8. DICTIONARY OF MANUFACTURED ANECDOTES 9. VARIATIONS ON A SCHEME 10. THE PAST IS ALWAYS SLOWER 11. OVERWORKED BABY 12. THE HI LO GAMBLERS DIET 13. MY PET FOX 14. ARTMAN 15. CAPTAIN DOG 16. PRUDENCE IS BASHFULNESS WITH GOOD PR 17. TOO MUCH TEMPERANCE 18. FAITHFUL TRAITOR 19. HOPE ON A ROPE 20. FORTITUDE AT 40 21. JUST CHARITY 22. WONDERFUL CONES 23. YESTERDAY’S FACTS 24. AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A GHOST 25. FUCKY YOU 26. DOSTOYEVSKYLAND 27. GOD GOD 28. BADFOOD 29. IT IS AS IT WAS 30. SECTION 215 31. A HUNGRY FLEA THE SIZE OF A HORSE 32. LAVARSI NA PETRA DE LA SCARPA 33. NORMALLY HAPPY 34. NAMELESS MADMEN 35. SLASH FICTION 36. AIN’T BLUE NO MORE 37. THE BOORISH WILL FLOURISH 38. SUCKED INTO THE SQUARE VACUUM 39. MERE FLUENCY 40. FIENDISH GROG 41. THE DRUG YEARS 42. PREEMPTIVE INDIVIDUALITY 43. NO COMPROMISE WITH TIME 44. THE BEST OPPORTUNITY I NEVER HAD 45. A BRIGHT PSYCHOPATH 46. REVENGE COMEDY 47. THE HYSTERIA CHANNEL 48. DEATHLESS PROSE 49. FRESH & FORMULAIC 50. WOULDN’T YOU MISS ME AT ALL 51. BIG-BUDGET OUT-TAKES 52. CITY OF GRITS 53. TITANIC TWO 54. WHO WROTE THE THE BOOK OF DRUGS? 55. SMASH UGLY 56. THE CREATIVITY OF FOOLS 57. CHEERLEADING CHIMPS 58. THE SHEEP’S HYMN 59. IT’S TIME TO PLAY CATCH THE SMALL FAST-MOVING OBJECT 60. TRUE AND LEADING CLAIMS 61. THE DRINKING PUBLIC 62. CAPTAIN THROWAWAY 63. THERAMINMANIA 64. OVERPRICED MAIDEN’S WATER 65. A FRANTIC PARADE TO NOWHERE 66. STALIN’S BULLET LIST 67. THREADBARE CHURLS 68. A MILLION MADMEN 69. GUILTY TOYS 70. KENTUCKY-FRIED GREASE 71. A DESERT FULL OF BIGOTS 72. FASHIONABLE NOTIONS 73. HUNGRY, DESPERATE, AND CHEAP 74. ACTES GRATUITS 75. KITOFOHS #75 1.A FEAST FOR CYNICS or 2. THE IDOL OF IDIOT-WORSHIPPERS or 3. CULTURALLY DOMINANT ASSUMPTIONS 4. ACCURACY IN PROPAGANDA 5. PASTEURIZED NEWS 6. I AM THE ONLY TRUE SPIRITUAL TEACHER IN THIS WORLD! 7. MAYBE YOU THINK I AM A HAPPY MAN 8. NARROW-MINDED BUM 9. STEAMY PASSAGGES 10. SUCKERTOWN 11. NOBODY REALLY KNOWS WHERE CELEBRITIES COME FROM, DO THEY? 12. DEAD MAGAZINES 13. A CRAZY MAN WITH LARGE BREASTS 14. I’M MY OWN BOSS BUT MY BOSS IS CRAZY 15. A STRANGE LOVE FOR ABSOLUTE POWER 16. IGNORING THE INEVITABLE 17. ENEMY ORDER 18. STUTTERING LEVIATHAN 19. EXCEPTIONAL PESTILENCES 20. SUPER CHECKLIST 21.ZIPSVILLE 22. AN AREA OF FLAT NOTHINGNESS 23. NO PATIENCE FOR MORONS 24. JOHN ENNUI 25. NORTHERN SKIES 26. SANTA’S GROUCHY FATHER 27. AGE-OLD UNDERDOG TALE 28. BACKWATER TO A BACKWATER 29. MUGGED BY REALITY 30. COMMUNIST BANDSTAND 31. CROWN OF MYRTLE 32. SCANDAL-POISONED CULTURE 33. TIMID INVENTIONS 34. DYSTOPIC CAWING 35. IN PRAISE OF SHOW TRIALS 36. SOFT-GUY DETECTIVE STORY 37. UNLIKELY COMPANIONS 38. A MYTH TO KEEP HATRED WARM 39. WISECRACKS ‘N’ STUNTS 40. UNDERRATED SECOND NOVEL 41. A HACK’S PROP 43. THE RANTINGS OF A LIQUOR-SOAKED RAT 44. PARENTAL ADVISORY 45. OFFICIAL MOVIE ADAPTATION 46. THE CHURCH OF VOLVO 47. PROPHETIC IDIOCY 48. THE DOG IS DEAD 49. HIT ME WITH THE GOOGLE STICK 50. SUPERMODERNISM 51. QUEER STREET 52. THE WORLD OF NOW 53. STRICTLY OBLIGATORY 54. MCDEATHIE’S 55. THE USUAL ELITES 56. TOP GOON 57. THE BORING SONG 58. WHAT DO YOU SAY? 59. THE PRINCE OF ARROGANCE 60. A NEW RATION OF MISERY 61. DEN SWEET DEN 62. DROPPING THE F-BPMB ON A MICROPHONE 63. HOBO JUNK TIME 64. RED HOT 65. I AM THE ONLY ONE READING 66. BALONEYLAND 67. LIMITED USELESSNESS 68. THE ODDS ARE GOOD BUT THE GOODS ARE ALL ODD 69. DARK AGE TO THE LEFT OF ME, DARK AGE TO THE RIGHT 70. A GENERAL AIR OF DIFFIDENT ARROGANCE 71. A FAILED STATE 72. TIME IS LIFE ITSELF 73. A NICE GIRL 74. THE FIVE PRESIDENTS YOU MEET IN HELL 75. TURN BACK WITHOUT SHAME #76 1. A SOCIETY OF STRANGERS or 2. A FRIENDLY KILL or 3. IDIOTIC SECRECY 4.THE ROBOT’S ADVOCATE 5. REFLECTOKILL GLASSES 6. UNDESIRABLE QUESTIONS 7. A TREE HAS NOTHING TO SAY UNTIL IT IS MURDERED 8. TERMS AND CONDITIONS NO LONGER APPLY 9. MY MOSAIC 10. LOSER DUST 11. GUOLAOSI 12. A HEALTHY FIXATION 13. WORKING CLASS MESSIAH 14. THE WISDOM OF THE DOVE 15. SAPPY ENDING 16. LAWLESS ENCLAVE 17. BIGGEST WHINERS IN THE DCU 18. FRANK SIMULACRA 19. LUSTING AFTER SADISTIC BRUTALITY 20. YOUR PSYCHIC HUSK 21. THIS RECRUIT 22. THE WIT AND WISDOM OF STALIN 23. FACEZIA 24. GETTING TO THE OTHER SIDE 25. PROPRIOCEPTION 26. DISTRESSED IN THE MIDST OF ALL THEIR POWER 27. SUPPORT AN UNWORTHY CAUSE 28. MY LEAST FAVORITE CHARITY 29. WHY HIM BUT NOT ME? 30. WORD CRIMES 31. KNEE-JERK CONSERVATISM 32. ANTIQUARIAN MISHMASH 33. BOOTY SOCIALISM 34. TRUE MODERNISM 35. AGAIN AUDACITY 36. MY FAVORITE RADIO MOMENT 37. FAT RASCAL WITH SNAPPING BLACK EYES 38. I GROW CONFUSED 39. PHANTOM CARRYING CAPACITY 40. UNWELL-INFORMED 41. ORDINARY AND BENIGN 42. I COULD SAY SOMETHING BUT I WON’T 43. THE INFECTIONS OF HUMAN CONCIOUSNESS 44. THE LAND OF SMASH AND GRAB AND ANYTHING TO WIN 45. UNKNOWN ZONE 46. BURST AND PUSH THE RED BUTTON 47. DON’T CORRECT ME IF I’M WRONG 48. SKIP INTRO 49. POLYSEMY 50. FLAMING TSAR 51. OLD MONEY SNEAKS 52. UNENLIGHTENED OLIGARCHY 53. TRANSPARENT AMBIGUITY 54.

dimenno	Feb 22 2011, 10:34 PM Post #2313
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	#76 54. MORONIC AUGUE 55. PROP FABLES 56. FELLATIO AT THE BRIDGE 57. CAT-FLAVORED DOGGIE TREATS 58. A PRIME CANDIDATE FOR EXORCISM 59. SQUEAKY HEE-HAWS 60. ABSINTHE…ABSINTHE! 61. MALINFORMATION 62. GLAMORIZING MY PSYCHOTIC OBSESSIONS 63. A GENERATION OF MEAT 64. LAPSES IN NIHILISM 65. THE GIBBERISH METER 66. THE THOUGHTFUL MOB 67. I WILL NOT SELL OUT TO GOD 68. VANA NOSTRAS ET INANIA GUADIA VITAS IMPLERUNT 69. THE INCREDIBLE SMIRKING MAN 70. DESECULARIZATION 71. FRIGHTENING IRREGULARITY 72. MICKEY MOUSE CONFIDENTIAL 73. UNPRINTABLE 74. THE SOCIAL ENGINEERING PROGRAM 75. WHY DID YOU SAY SO? #77 1. AN ILLUSION COMMON TO EVERY GENERATION or 2. GOD: GOOD GOAD or 3. USELESS FICTIONS 4. DO YOU LOVE ME? YOU WILL OR ELSE 5. SEX, VIOLENCE, AND RIVETING SUSPENSE 6. OURRU! 7. SCAREDY CAT O’FEAR 8. THE LADY OR THE TRAMP 9. REINVENTING THE TEN COMMANDMENTS 10. DEVILS WHO FIGHT THE PIOUS 11. DR. COFFEE AND MR. TEA 12. THE MOST DANGEROUS ENEMY OF HUMANITY IN THE WORLD TODAY 13. INDEFINITE STATE OF NON-PEACE 14. YOUR WONDERFUL LOSS 15. MY FAVORITE DEAD PRESIDENT 16. MY PANIC BUTTON IS AN ANT TRAP 17. HOW I COULD 18. A CHICKEN HEART AS BIG AS THE WORLD 19. HEROMAN 20. I HAVE MONEY 21. TRASHOMON 22. THAT BIBLE! 23. ZOMBIE & SON 24. AN ADULT BOOK 25. SMOKIN’ TOBIES 26. THEY SHAN’T HARM HODGE 27. WRESTLING WITH THE ANGELS 28. STOREFRONT STUPIDITY 29. COUSIN CUGINO 30. THE PERSONIFICATION OF ALL AMERICANS 31. GREEN STEAM 32. YEZHOVY RUKAVITSKY 33. I’LL HIT THE FATSOS 34. INFANTINE ECSTASY 35. THE CONTRADICTIONS OF ARTISTIC SUCCESS 36. BECAUSE 37. CONDOM KING 38. THE SITUATION KID 39. OXYMORONIC PROFESSIONS 40. DETECTIVE STORY VICTIMS 41. GETTING IT 42. CYNICAL IDEALISM 43. SQUEALING AND SNORTING WHILE EATING 44. SUPERFICIAL CAVEMAN 45. DOGFACE HEADCITY 46. THE INSANITY OF THE MEDIOCRE 47. TRUE PRETENSES 48. ELEGANT FATALISM 49. KING SUGAR 50. WHITE CASTLE VALUES 51. LI’L MILDEW 52. THE LIBERAL’S FLAG PIN 53. UNCLE MEANIE 54. THIS IS SOME KIND OF JOKE 55. I’M GOING FOR THE SILVER—I’M AFRAID OF GOLD 56. SGT. CAVEMAN 57. PSYCHO BOSS 58. PARTIALLY MITIGATED GALL 59. WHAT I HATE ABOUT THE NORTH 60. LUCY SIGHTINGS 61. THE COMPLETE FRAGMENTS 62. ENTELECHY 63. THE WORLD ENCYCLOPEDIA OF CHIMPS 64. I LIKE-A TO CHEW 65. DYLAN GIRLS 66. NATURAL CUBES 67. JESUS THE MOON GOD 68. MR. PATRIARCH 69. HIC ET NUNC 70. VIVID PORTRAITS OF POSSIBLE MEN 71. MR. CELLOPHANE 72. A HAND THAT I KNOW NOT SHALL LAY ME DEAD 73. SMASHING IDOLS IS THIRSTY WORK 74. BLIND CREEL 75. I WILL NOT DISCUSS MY DISINCLINATION TO TALK #78 1. THE DEVIL’S SUPERMARKET or 2. A LARGE ASSEMBLY LINE OF KING KONGS or 3. UNCLE RED 4. NUNC BIBEMOS 5. AT LEAST MY DEATH WILL SANCTIFY GOD’S WORK 6. LED ASTRAY BY ARTIFICIAL RULES 7. I LOVE YOU; I ALSO SO NOT 8. ET IN ARCADIA EGO… 9. SOAP DODGERS 10. INTERESTING MEANS “BULLSHIT” 11. LET’S MOVE IT, JESUS 12. BUSINESS SECRETS OF HENRY IV PART TWO 13. OBSESSED IN AMERICA 14. EUNUCH INTRIGUES 15. IMPERIAL FOOLS 16. BIPARTISAN CORRUPTION 17. AMERICA HAS LOST THE SOFTWOOD WAR 18. THE MERCY OF A PUNITIVE SKY 19. THE PAST 20. IPSA EXPERTA LIQUOR 21. DEFEATIST SNIVELING 22. INHUMAN STORIES 23. THE MYSTERY PLAY 24. FLUNKEY STATUS 25. CREATIVE DESTRUCTION 26. OH, SOD THIS FOR A LARK 27. IMPERSONAL DEMONS 28. CLUED UP 29. THE SWEATY CHEF 30. SHIRLEY HOLMES 31. THE PROBLEM IS IS THAT 32. ALL CHANGE 33. EGO TE ABSOLVO 34. SUPERMUNDANE THINGS 35. WE THREE CHIMPS 36. I’M NOT TELLING THE TRUTH HERE 37. THEY BE DEMONS 38. LOOK NOW 39. BIG TWANG AND DING 40. FETISHGIRL 41. JEMENFOUTISTS UNITE 42. GLOBAL DIMMING 43. HILARIOUSLY VAGUE 44. 100 WORDS OR LESS 45. THE UGLY CHILDREN OF THE POOR 46. THE GIFT OF THE MAGGOR 47. SQUAWK, MEMORY 48. LIFELESS FAT PIG 49. INN OF GRIEF 50. SATURDAY NIGHT IN THE MORON HOUSEHOLD 51. POOR LITERATURE 52. EUERGESIA 53. THE COMFORTS OF A VACANT CONSCIENCE 54. ONE, TWO 55. 98-FOOT BRONZE TEARDROP 56. BLESSED CANNON ARM 57. DAR LA ESTOCADA 58. THE LESSER RUTHLESS ONES 59. THE WANTON SEVEN 60. DECEPTIVE PRIMATES HAVE THE BIGGEST BRAINS 61. ADDICTED TO PAIN 62. MAD BOSS 63. A SMART INCOMPETENT 64. THE LONG MEOW 65. ROBA DA MATTI 66. TATTLETAILS HAND ON PIG’S TAILS 67. THE BIG STORY 68. SNACK HUNGRY 69. I AM NOT ALLOWED TO GO ON FOREVER 70. MYTHOPEIC MUSH 71. HE DO THE POLICE IN DIFFERENT VOICES 72. HUMBLE ABSTRACTIONS 73. RELIABLE GENERALIZATIONS 74. A TRUE ALARM 75. GLIB OBITUARY CHATTER #79 1. SKETCHES FROM ANYTOWN or 2. WAKE UP AND SMELL THE MUSH or 3. A WHEEL OF STORY 4. JESUS LOVES ME PASSIONATELY 5. SLIDING BOING AND DING 6. SIGNIFICANCE ENVY 7. A PERFECT MODEL OF MALICE 8. COERCIVE DYSTOPIANS 9. THE SOUL’S BRIGHT TORCH 10. I DON’T DO ARROGANCE 11. INFORMATION MCNUGGETS 12. PETULANT DAUPHIN 13. A LIGHTWEIGHT SMIRKING CHIMP 14. LIGHT, BREAD, FIRE AND HOPE 15. HITLER WINS 16. MEDIEVAL DEFAULT 17. PSYCHEDELIC ZOMBIES 18. MRS. PA 19. A KISS FOR THE BOOFUR LADY 20. PATHOGRAPHY TODAY 21. THE SONGS OF THE KINGS 22. GOOFY EVANESCENCE 23. BEYOND SMART 24. ALGEBRA & FIRE 25. STRONG AND WRONG 26. THE ACCEPTABLE FIRE 27. INEXHAUSTABLY BABY THING 28. MADNESS AND MOONSHINE 29. THE STORYWEAVER AT HIS LOOM 30. ACTION VIOLENCE 31. THE STARTLING STORY OF THE UNTOLD TRUTH 32. MY AUTOBIOGRAPHIES 33. THE BUSY MAN’S GUIDE TO NORTH AMERICAN IDIOTS 34. PAP 35. ADS FOR STARS AND PLANETS 36. PRESIDENT LSD 37. ONE WORLD GOOD 38. MR. DECADE 39. SAYING WEEP NO MORE 40. RENDEZVOUS WITH POSTERITY 41. A CERTAIN DISTANT NIGHT 42. IN MY DAY 43. THE VICAR OF DISNEY 44. I AM SO NOT GAY! 45. ATTACK DOG BISCUIT 46. THE CLOWNS IN WASHINGTON 47. DEEP-DISH ERUDITION 48. JOE FATSO 49. ON FULL DRUNK 50. DENSE FOG OF SLANDER 51. INCOHERENT MISCELLANY 52. ANOTHER SHEEP 53. OF THE SAME BREED 54. GIRLDOG AND BOYCAT 55. MY MIDGET MARRIAGE 56. ARROGANT ASININITY 57. CIRCUS OF VICE 58. A RITUAL ASS-WHIPPING 59. ADVANCE PRAISE 60. SHOUTING HEADS 61. COCKSWELL 62. WE AREN’T A SCHIZO 63. ASEXUAL RABBIT 64. REQUITED LOVE 65. CONSUMED IN STERILE TOIL 66. FURIOUSLY MELLOW 67. ASYMMETRICAL ENVIRONMENT 68. A MEAGER WHINER 69. ONE LONG QUAGMIRE 70. AN ARISTOCRATIC HUSTLER 71. THE OTHER ONE IS…. 72. CIRCULAR FIRING SQUAD 73. MARKET FOLKLORE 74. VENOMOUS SALVOS 75. COMEDY DEATH #80 1. HARD HEAD BONG AND BIRDS TWITTING or 2. CHRIST IS CRUCIFIED AND YET YOU LAUGH or 3. BITCH ‘N’ TOM 4. THE INEXHAUSTIBLE FOSSIL FOOLS 5. AFTERCLAP 6. PROCESS STUFF 7. NEGATIVE DISNEYLAND 8. YAWNFEST 9. THE HITLER CHAIR 10. I’M DOING THIS FOR GOD 11. RECYCLED HILLBILLIES 12. ZEROTASKING 13. HAPPY CRACK 14. THE ROTTEN PENNY 15. GOD SHALL BE MOVED BY OUR REPENTANCE TO PREVENT IT 16. DR. PEACE AND MR.WAR 17. NEO-X 18. WEAK OMNIPOTENCE 19. YOU’RE MEAN TO ME, YOU ARE 20. CONTEXT IS EVERYTHING 21. BELABORING THE OBLIVIOUS 22. PLAYING KARL ROVE 23. A CHIMERA OF THE ENSLAVED WILL 24. A FOOL’S DIARY 25. NOUSQUAMA 26. TRAGIC RELIEF 27. BATTLES AGAINST THE LORD 28. FLAVORS CATS INSTINCTIVELY CRAVE 29. THE RIVAL ABSURDITIES OF MURDEROUS MYTHOLOGIES 30. HISTORY OF A FICTIONAL SONG 31. BLANDIOSE 32. EVEN GOD DOESN’T APPRECIATE ME 33. MEN ARE CONFLICTED AND WOMEN ARE CONFUSED 34. THE MEAN STREETS OF ARCADIA 35. MASTER CHIEF 36. AN INSULTED GOD 37. DISTILLATION 38. A SHABBY FIESTA OF HYPOCRICY 39. ALL DIFFERENT THINGS ARE THE SAME 40. THERE IS A SOCK MONKEY…. 41. GRIM ADVISORIES 42. CRUMBS FROM THE GIANT’S TABLE 43. MASTERS OF VICE, TEACHERS OR WANTONNESS 44. I HATE FICTION: A NOVEL 45. VIVE MORITURUS 46. A HORDE OF LAZY EPICURIANS COUNTING BEADS 47. WILD BEGGARS 48. THE PROFITABLE DISSEMINATION OF NONSENSE 49. THE OBJECT GLASS 50. TIFOSI 51. THE VIOLENT FLAVOR OF THE POOR MAN’S KITCHEN 52. ONTOLOGICAL STATUS OF THE CONTINUUM 53. STOP TORCHING THAT HOBO! 54. THE BUN NEVER DIES 55. RITUAL DIRTYING 56. POLICE VIOLENCE 57. GOTTA KEEP MY PIMP HAND STRONG! 58. ANGRY CHISEL 59. CONFUSING TRICKERY 60. PHONY ABSTRACTIONS 61. A PANORAMA OF MADNESS AND DELUSION 62. MANIPULATED EPIPHENOMENA 63. VISIBLE HAND 64. AN UNKNOWN ANOMALY 65. EMPIRE OF FOOLS 66. THE ANGER BRIGADES 67. UNCHARACTERIZATION 68. FARTING THROUGH SILK 69. THE YOUNG GOD-KILLERS 70. THE UBIQUITY OF NARROW EXPECTATIONS 71. GRAND GUIGNOL FOR A DIME 72. FRIVOLOUS INVESTIGATIONS 73. THE LEGION OF SUPER PRESIDENTS 74. INVISIBLE CHAMPAGNE 75. THE DECORUM OF STUPIDITY #81 1. A VARIETY OF OPINIONS ON ALL KEY ISSUES or 2. A TOXIC MIX OF IGNORENCE, ARROGANCE AND STUBBORN IDEOLOGY or 3. A SWINEHERD UNDERSTOOD BY THE SWINE 4. REAL X 5. RETROLOGISM 6. ODERINT DUM METUANT 7. CIRCUS OF HYPOCRITES 8. VIRTUE RIDICULED 9. LEADER OF THE REBEL TRIBE 10. A NUREMBERG RALLY FOR IBM EXECUTIVES 11. FIST LAW 12. CRIME AND POVERTY, THE STORY OF MY LIFE 13. A QUALITY OF VISION 14. TRUE FICTIONS 15. NEVER MIND THAT 16. MILITARY-INDUSTRIAL SIMPLEX 17. WITAN & HUMOUR 18. ADAM’S SMILE 19. TWO ETERNITIES OF OBLIVION 20. SUBSIDIZED INSOUCIANCE 21. THE ANGRY PROVINCE 22. THE SALVADOR OPTION 23. A VERY LIVELY LITTLE FRIEND 24. PAGE 27 25. ONE OF 1,500,000 COPIES SIGNED BY THE AUTHOR 26. THE MERCILESS JUDGMENT OF CONSERVATIVE TASTE 27. MATRICES OF RESISTANCE 28. PASSIVE REVOLUTIONS 29. GUARDIANS OF AN EPHEMERAL IDEOLOGY 30. MYTH A LA MODE 31. THE ADVENTURES OF WORDS 32. THE SADDEST STORY OF THEM ALL 33. RATCHET-JAWED USURPER 34. BIZARRE RHETORICAL QUESTIONS 35. VALIUM OVERCOAT 36. CRAZIEST THING YOU EVER BELIEVED AS AN ADULT 37. INTROSPECTIVE APE 38. CHRISTIANITY VIRUS 39. NAMES FOR NEW EARTH 40. SLOW-ACTING PERMANENT ANGUISH 41. EQUAL TASTES LIKE CANCER 42. HATE Y’ALL 43. SILLY MILLIONARES 44. I LIKE TO WEAR HUMAN CLOTHES 45. THE GITMO ARCHIPELAGO 46. ZOMBIE AGENTS 47. LOST IN THE FOG OF A QUACK RELIGION 48. WOWING DOPES AND MAKING IDIOTS CHUCKLE 49. ALL THE SOUL’S DEEPEST DISTRESS 50. SYNTHETIC MOTS 51. COLORED DESCRIPTIONS OF UNIMPORTANT PHENOMENA 52. AS OF THIS WRITING 53. OHH DAAD! 54. I HAVE A BABY OF MY OWN AT HOME 55. TEX TALIONIS 56. SNOW BLACK 57. JOHN WARRIOR 58. A SMOKE SCREEN FOR VESTED INTERESTS 59. PSYCHOPATHIC LEADERS 60. TRYING SO HARD TO BE WRONG 61. NOT REALLY FALSE 62. THE END IS LIKE SO NIGH 63. COUP DE FOUDRE 64. 9 LIVES INSURANCE AGENCY 65. A WORLD WORTH SAVING AFTER ALL 66. GOOD TAX 67. HITLER OF THE WEEK 68. GARDEN OF MENACE 69. MOVE! 70. DUTIFUL CITIZENS 71. AN ASSIMILATED OUTLAW 72. YAH-BOO 73. JOYFUL PLAYGROUND IDIOCY 74. SELF-DRAMATIZING BOOR 75. SECURITY QUESTIONS #82 1. AN INSULATED GOD or 2. THE INEXHAUSTIBLE INHUMATIONS OF TIME or 3. ANGSTLAND 4. TOFU CHRIST 5. I AM FICTIONAL 6. A TROUBLING SUCCESSION OF BOUNDARY CHANGES 7. AN UNFINISHED NOVEL 8. THE GLASS FURNACE 9. SAVAGELY IDIOTIC 10. UNTOPIA 11. SPONTANEOUS NOVELTY 12. THE ADVENTURES OF AMPERSAND 13. …AND INDIANS 14. SO WHAT! 15. LOCAL JUDGMENTS 16. ELSIE IBSEN 17. LIBRARY OF HISTORICAL ERRORS 18. NOISY LUCIDITY 19. STORYBOOK BENEVOLENCE 20. CLEVER WORLDLINGS 21. THE WORLD NO LONGER NEEDS THE OLD 22. THE RED DEVILS 23. OFFICE CRETINS 24. IMITATION OF FEELING 25. THE UNENLIGHTENMENT 26. THERE IS NO MONSTER 27. SEX WITH YOGI BERRA 28. POOP AND CIRCUMSTANCE 29. VIRTUE LIBERTY GLORY HAPPINESS AND RELIGION 30. NO AMERICAN GENIUS BUT IN ENTHUSIASM 31. EVERY CLASS TEACHES YOU TO BE STUPID IN ITS OWN WAY 32. THE PLAY WITH 100 PEOPLE AND NO STAR 33. THINK FOR SOMEBODY ELSE 34. ONE MORE ODD CONSERVATIVE 35. CALAMATOUS COMEDY 36. YOU TOO HIP 37. CONDITIONS AND INFLUENCES 38. BITE THE APPARATUS 39. POWERFUL STRENGTH 40. DERANGED FEELINGS OF OMNIPOTENCE 41. THE ALL-WHITE NETWORK 42. A POST-TRUTH SOCIETY 43. ALEATORY FICTION 44. BANNED EVERYWHERE BUT IN BOSTON 45. HOLD YOUR BREATH 46. WE’LL ALWAYS HAVE KATMANDU 47. THE GIMMICK NOVEL 48. HETEROSEXUAL ROMANCE 49. IMPERIAL PREFERENCE 50. A MONSTROUS FACTORY OF LIES 51. MAD AGENTS OF THE BOURGEOISIE 52. NOVEL: A NOVEL 53. NAKED YEAR 54. NEW DEADLY SINS 55. OCEANS OF BLATHER 56. STUPEFYING AND MURDEROUS IN ITS LACK OF TALENT 57. WHERE HAVE ALL THE GOOD DRUGS GONE? 58. COLORATURA BANTER 59. THE MOTOWN MOVIE 60. SOLEMN IDIOCIES 61. REFRESHINGLY FALSE 62. THIS SHIITE IS SERIOUS 63. THIS SOLUTION RARELY OCCURS TO CARNIVORES 64. SUBLIME AMID A CIRCLE OF PRECIPICES 65. TODAY’S NEEDS 66. THE QUINETESSENTIAL EXTRACT OF MEDIOCRITY 67. A MORAL WINNER IS STILL A LOSER 68. THE ASININE VIOLENCE OF DISSENT 69. A CLOSED LOOP OF PROPAGANDA 70. SEA OF THE BOTTOMLESS 71. ALL OUR DISASTERS 72. PSYCHIC MUTILATION 73. THE DISINFORMATION AGE 74. MANUFACTURED CATEGORIES 75. BONUM VINUM LAETIFICAT COR HOMINIS #83 1. THE STARS SAY GIVE ME YOUR MONEY, ALL OF IT, NOW or 2. MY GREAT NEW BOOK or 3. WE’RE ALL ON A TRAIN TO NOWHERE 4. CLASS COMEDY 5. DODO LIBERAL 6. PUT THE INDIAN ON THE TWENTY DOLLAR BILL 7. THE COMEDY CLUB GULAG FOR SELF-STYLED HIPSTERS 8. FAMOUS AUTHOR’S SCHOOL 9. HETERONORMATIVE 10. 7000 PERSECUTED CHINESE BEARS 11. DATA SHOCKED 12. MY SLOVENLY WIFE 13. CLASS OF 80 14. ACTUAL NEWS 15. MUTUAL SCORN 16. ALWAYS A BRIDESMAID 17. DOG WHISTLE POLITICS 18. LAND OF THE NEW 19. WATER FUN 20. BIG DITCH OF INIQUITY 21. LOST IN MANY LAYERS OF SELF-CONTEMPT 22. KILLER’S GRIN 23. AW 24. CULTURAL RESISTANCE 25. NOVALLEY 26. THIRSTY DOG 27. THE DISNEY HAND 28. CLASS UNCONCIOUSNESS 29. PECUNIA NON OLET 30. THE EAT YOUR SPINACH SHOW 31. A PROPHET FACING BACKWARD 32. EVERYONE EVER 33. EL COBARDE BASTARDO 34. HORRIBLE PROPS 35. PILLSBURY SKULL BOY 36. DEAD KEEN 37. LISP SERVICE 38. GUARDIANS OF LIFE’S CONTINUITY 39. DAGUERROTYPES OF DEAD CHILDREN 40. A TWIG ON THE BUSH OF APES 41. EXTERMINATING ALL THE BRUTES 42. ATTACK OF THE 50-FOOT CARDBOARD CUT-OUT DISPLAYS 43. RACE AND CLASS IS THE NEW SEX AND MONEY 44. BRAIN-DAMAGED LOONY CRIMS 45. FAILING UP 46. THE BLEEDING EDGE 47. MORE OBSOLETE 48. NICHE FAMOUS 49. THE MINIBOARD 50. ACTA DIURNA 51. MASA, TELA, MI 52. MAGICIANS, CON-MEN, HACKS AND SCOUNDRELS 53. SADISTIC FIESTA 54. FEATHERWEIGHT ABSURDISM 55. A MORAL ABSOLUTE ZERO 56. HALFWAY TO MICKEY ROONEY 57. IMAGINARY LAWS FOR IMAGINARY COMMONWEALTHS 58. ALPHA HOBO 59. DEATHIE 60. EXTORTATORY SUBJUNCTIVE 61. BOOTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE COMPTROLLER 62. REGISTERED TROLLS 63. LIVING IN THE PIGGY MOMENT 64. A TACTICAL CAMPAIGN IN A HOUSE OF MIRRORS 65. REALITY TUNNELS 66. POLICING THE INEPT CONSTRUCT 67. A NERVELESS ROMANCE 68. INTERMINABLE SPEECH TO THE GRADUATES 69. BOREDOM AND DEATH 70. BITTER LITTLE EMBRYOS 71. NEW CERTAINTIES 72. MOOD POISONING 73. THE LINGUA FRANCA OF JUNK 74. AN INFANTALIZING FORCE 75. SUPERCONCIOUSNESS #84 1. THE LITTLE DRUMMER BOY PART TWO or 2. SANTA IN JAIL or 3. ALL LISTS ARE IDIOTIC 4. WHAT DUMB BEAST 5. CHILDREN, SAVAGES, AND TRUE BELIEVERS 6. A FRANTIC SIESTA ESSE 7. VIAGRA WARRIOR 8. VAMPIRE FAIR 9. ONE DAY IN THE LIFE OF A YOUNG MAN 10. BALANCED POLYMORPHISM 11. APOCALYPTIC CUTENESS 12. RAPTUROUS DEFEATISM 13. BANALITY OF SUCCESS 14. SYNDEMICS 15. DEEP NONSENSE 16. PRIMO SOMNO 17. FIGHT THE REAL ENEMY 18. A LIGHT SHOW OF FLOATING DREAD 19. FOOD IN MOUTH DISEASE 20. KISSY-FACED LOVE-FEST 21. NOT A NOVEL 22. YOUR SMILE IS KILLING ME 23. WILD LINES 24. WALLA-WALLA GROUPS 25. THE MARKETPLACE OF LIES 26. SIR BACKWARDS 27. GUTTER HERO 28. THE WOO GIRLS 29. STALKERATI 30. FALSE FIRSTS 31. DAFFY & POMPOUS 32. THE SECURITY GOD 33. THE WAR COULD LAST FOREVER 34. VITAMIN b9 35. WINTER AMERICA 36. DRUG HABITS OF THE PRESIDENTS 37. 700 FAMILIES 38. FAKESPEARE 39. THE CONSTRUCTION OF FEELINGS 40. THE WHITES-ONLY TELEPHONE 41. KIND LAUGHTER 42. DISSENT IS NOT PART OF THAT KIND OF LOVE HERE 43. PLAN Z 44. EX PLURO, UNA 45. LITTLE RUBBER CLOWN 46. THE NEO-19TH CENTURY 47. IMPERIAL NEWS 48. A VERY SPECIAL EPISODE 49. INSTANT CHRISTIANITY 50. THE CLOWN KING 51. L.H.O.O.Q. 52. TREASURE ARCHIPELAGO 53. LONELY DRUNKIE 54. WE LOVE YOU 55. MR. DEATH 56. CRAMPTOWN 57. CRIMINAL WORLD 58. THE CHRISTIAN NATIONALIST BIBLE 59. AMORALITY TALE 60. 1493 61. ANIMISM STORY 62. SOAPMAN 63. HOUSE OF SAFE SLEEP 64. RETARD STRENGTH 65. UNCLE POKER 66. FIERCE COWARDS 67. AUTHORIZE QUESTIONS 68. GLEEFULLY DETATCHED BOOKISHNESS 69. SONS OF VENGEANCE 70. THE FUCK CAMP ON LAKE WANNAMAKER 71. HATED SOUVENIRS 72. YOU SHOULD TALK 73. FISH EGGS FROM RED RUSSIA 74. DESIRE, HUNGER, REVENGE 75. SOMETHING CLOSE TO NONSENSE #85 1. ONE VASTER MYTH 2. A BOY HAS NEVER WEPT… 3. DIMENNO’S NOVEL 4. 50 GENERATIONS 5. THE WILD OPINIONS OF SAVAGES 6. THE WHITE NOTEBOOK 7. THE FOOL’S BIBLE 8. NO HAVEN 9. THE COFFEE VIRUS 10. THE GODDESS YEARS 11. DUMBOCRACY 12. ROBOT HAM 13. LETTER-PERFECT DENUNCIATION 14. TURNED DOWN? TURN ON! 15. PROPHECY MOST GRATUITOUS 16. DUBIOUS EGGS CALLED POSSIBILITIES 17. I HAVE ALWAYS NEVER TRIED 18. THE BOOK OF GENESSEE 19. LAKE NOWHERE 20. WHO I THINK I AM 21. INCARNATION EVAPORATED MILK 22. GOD 2 23. UNLUCKY IN HATE 24. AMERICAN SEX AND VIOLENCE 25. SECRET SOUNDTRACK 26. RICHARD GERBIL 27. STRENGTH FOR STRENUOUS MEN 28. PLANET OF THE COPS 29. COUNT DRAGON 30. NONSTOP CIRCUS OF ANGST 31. HOUSE OF METH 32. 45 NARRATIVES 33. POX POPULI 34. BLAND LIGHTNING 35. CHUM FOR HACKERS 36. THE SEASON OF ANARCHY 37. CARNAL WEAPONS 38. DEAD MAN’S LAST LETTER 39. ONE HOUR AFTER YOU READ THIS YOU’RE IGNORANT AGAIN 40. SECRET MARK 41. SPEAK PARROT, PRETTY BIRD, SPEAK 42. ENGINEERED AUTHENTICITY 43. EXPLOSIVE BATTLE OF GIANTS 44. YOU WON’T ME ABLE TO WITH ANYONE ELSE 45. UNCLE MACHO 46. VAMPIRE EQUINOX 47. MIGHTY PUPPET 48. JUNIOR SHADOW 49. DONALD DORK 50. TOXIC THEATRE 51. TITAN RAIN 52. MY GREAT COMPASSION 53. STALIN’S TIPS ON BUSINESS MANAGEMENT 54. THE DEVIL TOLD ME TO WRITE THIS BOOK 55. SO SOON 56. MEAT RIVER 57. SHITWARE 58. NON-NEGOTIABLE PATRIOTISM 59. I IS SOMEONE ELSE 60. LITERATURE’S RICH DISHONESTY 61. APORIAE 62. BRAVE NEW NOIR 63. THE FESTIVAL OF HIS DELIVERANCE 64. BOUNDED RATIONALITY 65. IRRELEVANT CONCERNS 66. BOOK AWARD FOR FICTION 67. PURGESAKE 68. FATAL ROMANTICISM 69. PLAUSIBLE ENEMIES 70. DEPAYSEMENT 71. PRISONERS OF A FANTASY 72. THE GREAT HEAP OF DAYS 73. ORANDUM EST UT SIT…. 74. POPPA DOOM 75. THE SUBLIME AMBIVALENCE OF PRECIPICES #86 1. GASBAG CITADEL or 2. THE SUBTITLE or 3. THE BIBLE OF STUPIDITY 4. EVERYBODY’S NOVEL 5. IF YOU REMEMBER THESE SONGS YOU MUST DIE 6. SHITADE 7. HOW TO READ THIS NOVEL 8. A THOUSAND ACTS OF HEROISM 9. ATTENTION 10. LICENTIOUS CONFEDERATES 11. TWO FISTS TO THE WIND 12. IMPERIAL AMERICA 13. DECAYED SPLENDOR 14. LIES TOLD TO CHILDREN 15. TEARS AT THE HEART OF THINGS 16. DEAD UTOPIA 17. THE MASK OF COMMAND 18. HUCK FINN, INC. 19. A BETTER IDIOT 20. ANTI-BEHAVIOR 21. TOO FRIGHTENED TO BE FEARLESS 22. FALSE FRIENDS, BAD DRUGS, FAKE SEX 23. POSITIVE THINKING RULES OK 24. THE AWKWARD SQUAD 25. THE BOOK OF HATE 26. HUMOR OF IMPERIALISM 27. GILT-EDGED SCURRILITIES 28. SONGS ABOUT YOU 29. MAGIC DOG 30. THE PERSONALITIES OF ROADS 31. A FRIVOLOUS SOCIETY 32. REMINISCENT OF BABY VOMIT 33. GIRLY FUN 34. SECOND-RATE AMERICAN FILTH 35. ATTENTIONAL RUBBERNECKING 36. PLEISTOCENE RE-WILDING 37. RAISED STRUCTURES 38. THIS STATEMENT FEATURES TWO LIES 39. DREAMS OF INTERESTING PEOPLE 40. THE VALENTINE GROUP 41. WELCOM 42. WHAT WOULD JOSEPH AND MARY DO? 43. MR. WHO 44. SUNDAY POISON 45. WHY DOGS LIKE TO EAT THEIR OWN TOENAILS 46. DRAMA KING 47. FROM THE WINDBAG 48. JERKWATER AMERICA 49. STAR BOUT OF IDOLS 50. PLAYING LUCIFER 51. A TEMPTEMPTUOUS CAD 52. SOVIET INGRATITUDE 53. SAGE NEGRO 54. REX MOBILE 55. NAT MIDGE 56. ANTHEAP MORALITY 57. SYNTHETIC SIGNAL MARKINGS 58. ETHICS CLOUDS 59. HASBEEN.COM 60. BEAUTY BY MISTAKE 61. ALL AGONISTS ARE LIGANDS 62. THE SHORT FALL 63. MR. M 64. KILLIN’ UP SHIT 65. THE PHANTOM PAIN OF LOST EMPIRE 66. CAPSLAM 67. THANK YOU FOR THE ARTICLE 68. WHEN BELOWNESS STORMS 69. BE FRUITLESS AND SUBTRACT 70. THE HIDDEN HONOR OF THE PARIAH PEOPLE 71. MICKEY MOUSE’S INFERNO 72. ADDICTED TO FAILURE 73. THE SOUR GRAPES OF A DEFORMED CULTURE 74. OUTLIERS 75. TRUE TO FACT #87 1. WHIRL IS KING or 2. THE SUBJECT OF LAUGHTER or 3. MATURE DEATH 4. KNIFO, FORKO, & SPOONO, THE PHILOSOPHERS OF THE BREAKFAST TABLE 5. THE RUIN OF THE STATE 6. REUCTANT SLAVES OR HYPOCRITES 7. DEPRESSED MISER 8. THE VIOLATORS 9. WHEN PRINCE WAS GOOD 10. PLEASE KILL MY LITTLE SISTER 11. I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY 12. OPERATION UNBIRTH 13. TRAMP STAR 14. WHO BROUGHT REEFER 15. IMITATION OF DISASTER 16. ATTACK OF THE 50 FOOT WOOFERS 17. IMAGINARY AFFAIRS 18. HALFWAY TO PARADISE 19. PLANET OF THE BOASTFUL LOVE SONGS 20. THROW ANOTHER CHIMP ON THE BARBIE 21. TRAGEDY IN THE DEPARTURE LOUNGE 22. YOUR HAIR IS KILLING ME 23. TRANQS FOR THE MEMORIES 24. WHEN GAK WAS KING 25. DON’T START THINKING ABOUT TOMORROW 26. YESTERDAY’S BLOWJOBS 27. WANT FRIES WITH THAT? 28. SONGS PLAYED IN LAUNDROMATS 29. THE DIGITALIS UNDERGROUND 30. LOVE TO FAIL 31. ROUGE STATE 32. KORN KING 33. THE WRY CUCKOLDS 34. BLUE-COLLAR LITE 35. JANISSARY IN A DRUM 36. BLACK IMAGES OF THE LOST CRUSADE 37. URCHIN JERKY 38. A DIGITAL YODA IN THE NEW PHANTOM MENACE 39. FRIED GENRES 40. RAWHEAD AND BLOODYBONES 41. NIZE COP 42. THE NEW OLD PEOPLE 43. ZACHODINO POMORSKIE 44. PSYCHEDELIC PIMPS 45. COMPREHENSIBLE MALICE 46. PRIMITIVE RESPONSES TO A DANGEROUS WORLD 47. 20000229 DOES NOT COMPUTE 48. MAKE ROOM FOR DADA 49. MEET PAVLOV’S DOG! 50. THE EDITOR OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE 51. IT’S HARD TO TAME THE DOGS 52. WOLF BATE 53. HOLLYWOOD FOR THE UGLY 54. RIOT IDIOLOGY 55. SLOBBY THINKING 56. MERE ALIEN MISCHIEFS 57. BURP AND GRUNT DIPLOMACY 58. DECADENCE, ESCAPISM, & INSULATION 59. KOVEN KLAN KLOTHING 60. INTELLIGENT DISCONTENT 61. BOMBS OF FILTH 62. MAHOGANY WHISTLEJACKET 63. SOUNDS GOOD TO ME 64. THE NARCISSISTIC RAGE OF THE GRIEVING MOTHER 65. RASHED 66. THE CONSENSUS IS WRONG 67. FATHER OF LIES 68. THE WIZARD OF M 69. THE SHARP EDGE OF POWER 70. INCARNATION 71. GLASSINE ENVELOPES 72. BOATS TO FOREVER 73. A DIM HOWLING IN THE DISTANCE 74. NATIONAL GODS 75. BUSH 43, WORLD ZERO #88 1.MORE SONGS ABOUT POLYESTER & MULLETS or 2. SLOB’S PARADISE or 3. WHAT MOST CONCERNS ME 4. THE CELEBRITY ROOM 5. LIBRARIA 6. DEFINING DEMOCRACY DOWNWARD 7. SOME DEVILS 8. GORDURA ES HERMOSURA 9. PALACE CRIME, BLOODSTAINED MAGNIFICENCE, & MORAL SQUALOR 10. FROM KRAAL TO SLUM 11. THE NARCISSARIAT 12. THE SKINNY WALRUS 13. DESIGNATED DRUNK 14. THE SCHOOL OF DANGER 15. DO IT TO JULIA 16. INAUGURATION OF THEE GLOBAL MONARCHY 17. PHANTOM LOADS 18. SULTED 19. … OF NAZARETH 20. HRITHIK ROSHAN HAS TWO THUMBS 21. I MUST BE DREAMING 22. NEW CATHEAD DEFORMITIES 23. THE SAD ARC OF GREED 24. SGT. CARTER’S LONELY HEARTS CLUB BAND 25. THE LIVING FISH SWIMS IN WATER 26. ORIG UNK 27. MILK OF AMNESIA 28. ASKING FOR TROUBLE 29. OLD LADY EVIL 30. GOODY MORNINGSTAR 31. THE HAMMER OF BITCHES 32. TYRANT IN THE HOUSE 33. QUICK-ACTING HYPNOTICS 34. THE WHITE CARD 35. TOWN VS. VILAGE 36. BELLIGERENT SENILE 37. YOUR NEIGHBOR’S SCREAMING KID 38. WINO WINES 39. WHAT WE MIGHT SOMEDAY CREATE 40. SUGAR WALLS 41. THE PURE FINDERS 42. SNAGGLETOOTHED HAG 43. VIPER STRIKES AND HEALING HANDS 44. TERTULIA 45. LIST 99 46. HACKNEYED HEROIC BILGE 47. NAKED BABIES WAILING FOR FOOD AS MEN GET DRUNK ON STOLEN LIQUOR 48. BLOOD MOUNTAIN 49. DAR AL-HARB 50. BEDU ZAPS KHTHOM PLEKTRON SPHINX 51. BLACK SKY IN MORNING 52. AXTON HILLOCK 53. MULTIPLE USES OF LETTER A 54. HEY LITTLE FUCKER 55. CARAVEGGIO THE DEVIL 56. MELANESIAN CLAY PIDGIN 57. HERE COMES LAPP SHAMAN 58. LEARNEY TOWN 59. MICKEY THE REVOLUTIONARY 60. THE FAIRY GODFATHER 61. A PRAYER FOR THE NEW YEARS 62. MR. BRAVADO TOUGHGUY 63. AN ACCIDENTAL LIFE 64. LITTLE TURDCAKE 65. I AM THE FLY 66. WHY IS NOT THE ANSWER 67. SPECTRAL NATIONS 68. MOLOCH & FRIENDS 69. JACK STARM 70. MY WAY OR THE SUPERHIGHWAY 71. HIPPIER THAN EVER 72. HONOR THE LIVING 73. OLD MAN LADY LUCK 74. GENERAL MAYHEM 75. GIRLS VS. BOYS #89 1. SELF-INDULGENT PERVERSITIES & CRAZY EXTRAPOLATIONS OF THE IMAGINATION or 2. THE WAY OF LIFE THE SONG CALLS FOR or. 3. THE ILL-ADVISED PROJECTS OF A RASH YOUNG MAN 4. TINY TIM WHO DID NOT DIE 5. MY EXTREMIST AGENDA 6. MK 77 7. LEO WEASELTEAR 8. SEE EVIL 9. INTERIOR IMPERIALISM 10. DEVIANT RIFLES 11. THE SPOKESMAN OF BITTER RACISM 12. GEEK SPEED 13. NERVOUS HEADACHE 14. MS. GODDAM 15. THE SEX LIFE OF GOD 16. NOT FAMOUS 17. 23.5 18. SMASH ALLEY 19. FALSE PEACE OF MIND 20. IDENITY TO SPARE 21. A SENSIBLE ACT 22. YOU HAVE TO TELL ME YOUR CORRECT DISGUISE 23. CLOAK OF INFALLIBILITY 24. ME: A POEM 25. AN EXPLOSION OF OUR PEOPLE’S JOY 26. THE SITUATION KID 27. EVERYTHING YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT FEAR 28. THE MADNESS BUILDING 29. META-GRUMBLE 30. WHERE DOES THE ANGER GO? 31. NEGROES TO BE SOLD 32. UNBEARABLE ART 33. WHERE I GET ALL MY IDEAS 34. A ROUTINE FEAST 35. MY BABY IS NOT UNIQUE 36. DESTROYER OF VISIONS 37. HONESTY 38. MR. PRESS 39. GGS & CCR 40. COFFEE GOODNESS 41. YOUNG BEAUTY 42. SERENITY 43. INSPIRED BY A TRUE STORY 44. THE BORING QUEST 45. SURRENDER TO THE TERRORISTS 46. HAMBONE’S MEDITATIONS 47. SHANTY INTELLIGENTSIA 48. SURREAL OBTUSENESS 49. PORTRAIT OF A WILD MAN 50. THE ICE FLY 51. HAIL FELLOW WELL DEAD 52. BABYLON BABYLON BABYLON 53. 219 & 5 16THS 54. FLOATING ON A RIVER OF DARK MATTER 55. MASS GRAVE OF DODOS 56. THE FIVE TECHNIQUES 57. FUTILITY MUSIC 58. TRIAL BY FURY 59. NECROECONOMY 60. JUNIOR SAGE 61. ASSASSIN NATION 62. THE CIRCUITRY OF DESPAIR 63. POVERTY GENES 64. THE WORD BROTHERS 65. JOHN TROUBLE 66. MUTE SWANS IN PERIL 67. HOLLY PARK 68. THE COLONIAL ME 69. PREPONDERANCE 70. WHAT THIS IS NOT 71. GUESS WHAT! I WEPT! 72. THE IDIOT WELL 73. HAGIFICATION 74. SLOW MOTION APOCALYPSE 75. THE NEW SUPERMAN #90 1. MR. POLICE or 2. EXPOSED AGENDA or 3. HOW THE DEVIL CAME TO DETROIT 4. GENRE-SHIFTER 5. OPIE IS DEAD 6. FALL INTO SILVER 7. CYBERJIHAD 8. PHOTODOGS 9. PENILE IMPERIALISM 10. COSTS THE EARTH 11. HOSTIS HUMANI GENERIS 12. THE PRIMAL HORDE 13. VIRTUOUS CYCLES 14. TOO MUCH NITROGEN 15. ELECTRONIC ALLEY 16. MATURE BOY 17. SUPERSPY 18. QKENCHANT 19. WORLD’S FUNNIEST MONKEY 20. PIMP FOR THE IMPERIUM 21. GREEN MAN 22. FUNAMBULIST 23. THEY EAT THEIR YOUNG 24. THE BOOK OF IAM 25. DARK CRANKERIES 26. ALL HELLAS BREAKS LOOSE 27. WINNIE THE SHIT 28. THE COMPANY THAT MAKES MY XENOPHOBIA MEDS 29. GENTLE MASTER 30. CRIME FOOD 31. SONGS FOR A PSYCHEDELIC REVIVAL 32. THANK YOU FOR NOT KILLING ME 33. VARIETY 34. SHITFIRE ISLAND: WHERE THE GAY REDNECKS GO 35. BRAIN FEAST 36. HERPES DUPLEX 37. NO PRONOUNS 38. A GOOD OLD FASHIONED HATE 39. THE CALL HIM COWBOY 40. THE INCOMPREHENSIBLES 41. MOVIE MADNESS 42. ALASKA FACE 43. OVER THE TOP 44. THE PIZZA BOY AT ELMHURST 45. THE VARIOUS GODS 46. THE DAY REAGAN CAME TO MY SCHOOL 47. AMERICAN CANDY 48. SLEEP IN THE GRAVE 49. I’M ODD ENOUGH TO BE YOUR FATHER! 50. TEENAGE CENTURIONS FOR THE COMING ARMAGEDDON 51. THE AKASHIK RECORD COMPANY 52. THE BOOK OF JOHN FOR THE JOHN 53. THE SHENANIGANS OF A MORTAL FOE 54. THE DEVIL LENS 55. SLEEPY RIGAMAROLE 56. A GROTESQUE KNOT 57. THE VILLAIN IS THE WORLD 58. JABBERING DYNAMO 59. A SYMPATHY ORCHESTRA 60. UNDIFFERENTIATED IRONY 61. A FUGITIVE REJECTION OF EVERYTHING 62. THE HALF LIFE OF NOT GETTING THE POINT IS FOREVER 63. AN INANE EXERCISE IN THREATS AMONG ROBOTIC BELLIGERENTS 64. MAGIC SCENARIOS 65. THE CIRCUIT OF A DOGMA 66. A HANDOUT TO THE FORTUNATE 67. THE WASHINGTON CONSENSUS 68. COSMIC RUTHLESSNESS 69. MISS GOD 70. THE HARD-WON FAITH OF A MODERN PHILOSOPHER 71. AN AMUSING WILL TO LIVE 72. MINOR 6-1-4-5 CHORUS 73. MASCOT PARABLES 74. 150,000,000 HOT DOGS 75. THEY SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE 91. 1. GENRE PROPAGANDIST or 2. SUSTAINABLE DESTRUCTION or 3. CHAOS RITUAL 4. MEN’S SINS 5. THE CONTAINMENT BOYS 6. A PAGAN SUCKLED IN A CREED OUTWORN 7. ALPHA RADIATION 8. THE ANATOMY OF ECSTASY 9. SUICIDE COMEDY 10. ALL TOPIC SENTENCES 11. FAST APPEARING IN A NEARER VIEW 12. DAMN I WISH I WAS YOUR LOVER 13. NO MAN LIVING MAY SCAPE AWAY 14. THE CURIOUS TEXTURE OF OUR DREAMS 15. META-SENSE 16. THE CRAFTED INSIGHT 17. MEAT ON THE TABLE 18. MRS. BABYMOTHER 19. MOSQUITO APOLOGIST 20. NECESSARY CRUELTIES 21. GOD’S DETECTIVE NOVEL 22. THE DOMINION OF INHUMAN TIME 23. A CLEAN GATAWAY 24. THE CRUCIFIXION AS A DRUG DEAL GONE WRONG 25. WHAT YOU HAVE MADE 26. DRY APOCALYPSE 27. SUBTLE CORRUPTIONS 28. ENDLESSLY REGURGITATING THE SAME BRIGHT SHARDS 29. PERPETUAL REVERSAL 30. DESPERATE PILGRIMS 31. A MYSTERY SET IN LIMBO 32. SONIC IMPULSES 33. BIG CATS: A NOVEL 34. LOSER ID 35. THE RAT PARADE 36. A HOTBED OF REST 37. MR. EVOLUTION 38. MY PATH TO COMPLETE MASTERY 39. ALL YOU CAN DO IS NOT ENOUGH 40. GOD-LUCK HANDSHAKE 41. UNIT OF EMPIRE 42. CASUALTIES OF MY EGO TRIP 43. WHAT I’VE LEARNED 44. A WEALTH OF PROSTHETICS 45. LIFESTYLE PORN 46. THE WORST NOVEL 47. SOUR CHOCOLATE 48. MR. MANHATTEN 49. HAPPY AGAONY 50. PARTISAN-BAND TV 51. TEAR FACTORY 52. A QUIET LIFE 53. HITLER ON A VALENTINE 54. INSTAFLOW 55. A CONVERSATION PIECE 56. GHOST SOUP 57. A ROMANCE OF THE RUTHLESS 58. PROJECT: MADNESS 59. A PERFECT EXAMPLE IS 60. LEMON DETECTION 61. WORD GOT OUT 62. PLASTIC BOTTLECAPS 63. THE ADULT WORD 64. A LITTLE FART 65. PIE JUNKIES 66. PLEASE ADVISE 67. MI NO WOKIM WANPLAY SAMTING I RONG 68. OGLE.COM 69. THE VOICE OF GOD 70. SKEUOMORPHY 71. THE ONE WHO WENT AWAY 72. THE SATIRIST 73. ELEVEN BENEVOLENT ELEPHANTS 74. REASON GONE MAD 75. MYSTIFYING ORACLE 92. 1. NAGASAKI: A PRANK THAT WENT TOO FAR? or 2. DO NOT LISTEN TO THE VOICES or 3. MR. GRANDPA 4. NOTHING: A NOVEL 5. WHAT IS “42” 6. THE LAUGHTER OF GENIUS 7. WOOD BEEZ 8. VOIDS IN THE FABRIC OF MEANING 9. RASSESCHANDER 10. I AM TWO PEOPLE 11. A FOOL’S JOURNEY FROM SOIL TO PLATE 12. THE BLACK LAB 13. THE DAILY BEATING 14. I WANNA BE YOUR BOYFRIEND 15. NIXON’S REVENGE 16. FORGIVE TEXAS 17. EPIC OF THE PAROCHIAL 18. PRETTY POLLY 19. ADULT SULK 20. NO-IRONY READING 21. SWEATED LABOR 22. A BROTHER I’D RATHER NOT HAVE 23. UNITED IN IGNORANCE 24. A CYBERSPACE CALIPHATE 25. LAZY FAMILIES 26. A GLASS PALACE 27. EGOISME A DEUX 28. RIDICULOUS NAMES 29. SECRET JUSTICE 30. COMMISSARS OF THE RESPECTABLE 31. THE TRUTH ABOUT LIFE 32. MONEYLAND 33. JUST WHO I THINK I AM 34. MINT SUCKERS 35. THE SNORE OF THE CROWD 36. THIS TIME IT’S TRIBAL 37. I AM THE GHOST 38. ANGER POINTS 39. FOUR ROSES LOGIC 40. PAS A DOUCHE 41. EROTOTOXINS 42. NOT YOUR GRANDFATHER’S FASCISM 43. SANDBOXING 44. PURITAN JEALOUSY 45. SIX MONTHS AWAY FROM THE BIN 46. DUCE COME BACK 47. IMAGINED DISEASES OF THE MIND 48. C2766 49. REAGAN NOIR 50. BITTER APPLE 51. 100,000 WORDS OR LESS 52. TIN EAR FOR CRITICAL TIMES 53. THE FAMOUS CROWD 54. PLOT 55. THE FOUR MOPTOPS OF THE APOCALYPSE 56. I AM NOT SPY 57. HELLO PATSY! 58. SATORI IN CONNECTICUT 59. ISN’T THAT RARE? 60. CLOWNS AND ARCHITECTURE 61. SATIRE IN THE RAW 62. DOES IT PASS THE SO WHAT TEST? 63. EIDOLOCLASM 64. VOICES ECHOING IN MY HEAD 65. IN REAL LIFE 66. GET HUMAN 67. SUPERHEAD 68. SLOB KILLER 69. DESIGNER IMPOSTER VERSION 70. BROSEPH 71. ONLY CONNECT 72. ANT HERO GOD 73. THE MAP 74. BUMMER COMMAND 75. HOLOCAUSTVILLE 93. 1. MY GOD, I’M TOUGH or 2. EVERYTHING I DO IS GREAT or 3. LIVE LIKE YOU’RE ON FIRE 4. THE REISSUE TREATMENT 5. AND WHEN I WOKE I WAS DEAD 6. DAMN THE WORLD 7. ARCADIUM 8. CRACKPOT REALISTS 9. DESIGNATED PUNCHING BAG 10. UGLIER THAN THOU 11. THIRTY-TWO ANIMAL PALS 12. A COMIC OPERA 13. THE THROWSTARS 14. HAPPY AGAIN 15. PEYOTE PLACE 16. HATE PAPER DOLL 17. EVERYTHING IS LOVE 18. TRAPPED IN AN IDIOM 19. THOUSAND MILE STARE 20. MESSIAH IS COMING 21. COMMANDER ROBOT 22. TEAM B 23. TERROR MASTERS 24. DELICATE WEEDS 25. MATURE LIVING CHOICES 26. BUILD HIGH 27. PURE FICTION 28. U977 29. THE DARNED SURE 30. ARE YOU UPPER CLASS? THEN YOU’RE UPPER CLASS! 31. G.I. DOPE 32. THANK YOU FOR SENDING ME AN ANGLE 33. DUH WISDOM 34. I THINK I WANT TO DANCE! 35. HIGH-DECIBEL CIRCUS 36. ILL-CONSIDERED EROTICA 37. BAD SUCCESS 38. LADY BONER IMMEDIATELY GOES TO ZERO 39. AMERICA HATES THE SIXTIES 40. TURN PIGSHIT INTO CRUDE OIL 41. THE INDUSTRY-STANDARD DEFINITION OF A HIT 42. SPECIAL IMPORTANCE 43. THE BOOK I WISH I HAD WRITTEN 44. THE BLACK LABORATORY 45. PRINCE BUMMER OF WOODSTOCK 46. THE HISTORY OF THE UNTIED STATES 47. GRAND OCCASIONS 48. WEIRD TITAN 49. MILLIONAIRES, BEAUTY QUEENS, STUPID RECORDS & HOLLYWOOD 50. MY DOG’S PERSONAL BATHROOM 51. THE FIRST CASUALTY 52. GOOD BOMBING 53. SAVAGE BRUTAL FORCES SEEKING TO SUBJUGATE THE WORLD 54. ONE MAN’S INSANITY 55. CENSORSHIP IS GOD 56. THE ADVENTURES OF LEAH GILTRIP 57. THE EDUCATION OF A PREDATOR 58. BLITZKRIEG MOUSE 59. ACROSS THE GRAY HORIZON 60. A CLOCKWORK ZOLA 61. BORING WOLF 62. VIBING THE ZEITGEIST 63. THE RUTHLESS FURNACE OF THE WORLD 64. ALL-NEW MEMORIES 65. INSTANT NOVEL 66. TELL US Y U SO HORNY 67. EARTHBALL 68. DISPOSABLE SIDEKICK 69. CAVE PAINTINGS 70. RAIDER JOHNSON 71. THE NEGATION OF STORYTELLING 72. THE WINTER OF OUR CONTENT 73. SHAME SPIRAL 74. HAPPY TRASH 75. EMOTIONAL TRANSPORTATION 94. 1. MEETS OR EXCEEDS FAMILY UPLIFT STANDARDS or 2. I KNOW THAT I AM A BALLER AND THAT LIFE WILL BE PHAT or 3. ALL THOSE WHO HAVE LOVED US INTO BEING 4. TOP BIRD 5. FEAR OF MOUSE 6. PIGLET IS UNCLEAN 7. WINE OF CARDUI 8. THE PRICE YOU PAY FOR DREAMING 9. TRANSGRESSIVE PROPAGANDA 10. COFFEE BLOOD 11. PLAIN OLD SIMPLE ENGLISH 12. PERIOD RACISM 13. HOOKED ON LIFE 14. TRASH PAGE-TURNER 15. THE WICCA MAN 16. PERFECT 17. THE CENTRAL EXECUTIVE IN AREA 46 18. ARABIAN STEAM WHISTLE 19. IRRELEVANT ASSOCIATIONS 20. LINCOLN SAID THAT 21. 9871 22. WHEN BEGGARS DIE THERE ARE NO COMETS SEEN 23. VARIORUM 24. THE JESUS PAPERS 25. CASUAL WREN 26. SAGE THRASHER 27. HOODED ORACLE 28. DIVORCE MAGAZINE 29. NECRO FALLS 30. AUTISM MADE E-Z 31. MY DREAMS MISS ME 32. YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT DEPARTURE 33. THEY ARE THERE 34. ICONIC BLOND 35. GRAPE & PILL 36. FRAME FUCKING 37. CAST OUT BY MY BELOVED COMMUNISTS 38. INFLATABLE MAN 39. THE PURPLE GANG 40. NIETSZCHE MAN 41. METAPAEGNIA 42. GOD BITES MAN 43. THE EXCESSES OF AGE 44. JUDAS SOLD SEPARATELY 45. LETHALLY BLONDE 46. THE ART BULLY 47. A SCARED UNIVERSE 48. ME, PICK ME 49. SUPERSTITIOUS MEN 50. AN INTERESTING NOVEL 51. CENTRAL HEAT REGISTER 52. THE HITCHING POST 53. CRAZY BREAD 54. THIS BOOK IS ALIVE 55. SHEEP MUSIC 56. THE VICES OF AN EMPTY SOUL 57. COUNTRY DARKNESS 58. THE VICE PRESIDENT’S GONE MAD 59. THE OWNERS OF A HOUSE OF SQUALOR 60. RIGHTEOUS REMNANT 61. CHILIASTIC DREAM 62. CHURCH OF JIMMY 63. JESUS OF THE LOST CONTINENT 64. SIR WHITEMAN 65. GRASSY KNOLL SOCIETY 66. FREED SLAVES OF DRINK 67. KILLDEER ISLAND 68. DR. EMERGENCY 69. IT JUST ISN’T DONE 70. CAPTAIN ANARCHO 71. ODIN ON OUR SIDE 72. READABLE 73. SUPERSIZE MY MAFIA 74. MAKING COWBOY LOVE 75. I BELIEVE EVERYTHING I READ IN THE PAPERS 95. 1. THE NEW STRANGE AMERICA or 2. CAPRICIOUSLY MALEVOLENT BULLY or 3. CHURCH OF DRACULA 4. CRITIC UNIVERSITY 5. MR. CAP’N 6. INSTANT QUAINTNESS 7. FEED KILL CHAIN 8. THE BOOK OF TODAY 9. MY FIVE JESUSES 10. FRIES WITH THAT 11. STANDING HEAD 12, OSWALD ONASSIS 13. DON'T YOU SEE WHAT POTTER'S TRYIN' TO DO? 14. CIA DISNEYLAND 15. HOUSES OF THE HORNY 16. THE RED DESQUAMATION OF OLD IRON 17. PLATINUM PARK 18. CORRECT VIEWS ON EVERYTHING 19. THERE. I SAID IT 20. COUCH COWBOY RESORT 21. S&M AMUSEMENTS 22. POINT SALUBRIOUS 23. THE FLY GODS MUST BE CRAZY 24. FROZEN CORPSE RANCH 25. DOG TATTOOS 26. CHURCH OF THE 17 CHRISTS 27. THE HARD MAN 28. UNCLE SPIKE'S CABIN 29. THE STRONG ARE HARD DONE BY 30. THE RED POSTBOX 31. ADAM & EVE & KICKME 32. THE HIT CLUSTER 33. OLD TERRIFIC 34. THE BOUNDARIES 35. THE MARRIAGE OF BIZARRO 36. JESUSBURGER 37. THE MASKED DUCK 38. DR. NURSE 39. MOTHER HERO 40. CHURCH OF PERFECTION IN DEATH 41. THE SANDPAPER MINISTRY 42. EXPLODING MYTHS 43. 1001 STORIES I MUST TELL 44. JUDAS SOLD SEPARATELY 45. MALEVOLENT WASTEFUL DOG 46. SAYING WEEP NO MORE 47. SIX GUN FOUNTAIN PEN 48. PRETTY BOY DRUNK THE IN LAW 49. THE BOOK OF HOGWASH 50. PLEASE LET ME DIE FOREVER 51. MONKEY GENIUS 52. BOGUS SATANIC RACKET 53. BOMBASTIC ARENA SPECTACLE 54. WAY-COOL PUNK REVIVALISM 55. THREE CHORD GUITAR WANKING 56. SYNTHS UP THE BUMHOLE 57. ZERO-TALENT THUG FRONTING 58. PRETEEN GIRLY FUN 59. JUST BLAIN BAD ROADHOUSE BLUES 60. BEAT ME WHIP ME GOTH MARTYRS 61. TWEEDY MOLDY FIG JAZZ REVIVALISTS 62. OAFY AND HIS STUMBO ROCK THREE 63. HAPPY HIPPIE AND HIS HOWDOWN HUMPERS 64. DAD & HIS TORTURED SURF ROCKERS 65. STUPID SELF-CENTERED SONGBIRD CHANTEUSE 66. GUYS BACKING A CHICK SINGER SO THEY CAN FUCK HER 67. H. RAPE BROWN & THE BACK TO AFRIKA KREW 68. BUTCHY LESBIAN & HER SELF-RIGHTEOUS BISEXUALS 69. LOCAL YOBBO AND HIS TOWNIE ROAR 70. VULGAR WOULD-BE FUNNYMAN & THE NOVELTY ACT 71. THE AGITPROP WANKERS 72. YOUR FINGERS ARE MEAT TO A HUNGRY DOG 73. EVERY OTHER WORD 74. ALL THINGS THAT ARE WHITE 75. JESUS NEVER RESTS 96. 1. SANTA'S DYSPEPTIC GRANDPA or 2. TROUBLEMAKER SQUARE or 3. THE RED TELEGRAPH 4. NOTHING-BURGER 5. PARSLEY PARK 6. A BOOK YOU MUST NOT READ 7. THE WARS OF IDENTITY AND THE INJURIES OF CLASS 8. IT JUST SO HAPPENS 9. I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY FRIEND 10. THE CAPITALISTIC CONTRADICTIONS OF CULTURE 11. THE BOOK GROUP DISCUSSES GREAT LITERATURE 12. MY CELEBRITY CHILDREN 13. INTERESTING MADMAN 14. YOU NEED 15. THE VIKING PIMP 16. DR. CRIME AND MR. PUNISHMENT 17. I LIKE TO KID THE JEWS—BUT SERIOUSLY…. 18. CASH & CARRY 19. THE BABY YEARS 20. THE PENITENTIAL NARCISSISM OF THE WEST 21. MR. BOSS 22. CAPTAIN ANTIMAMERICA 23. HOWDY TOWN 25. YOUTHUG 26. EXACT REVENGE 27. A TIGHTROPE OVER HELL 28. A BIOLOGICAL INEVITABILITY 29. POSH CRISPS 30. THE BURPIST 31. SNAPPY DING 32. A CORRUPT JOKE 33. NETWORK GOD 34. LIVE FREE AND DIE ANYWAY 35. MULTIPLE CHOICE EXAM: A NOVEL 36. THINK GLIBLY ACT LOCO-LY 37. A UNIQUE COLLECTION OF FAIRY-TALE CLASSICS 38. THE FEMALE TRIBE 39. FAR-OUT SHAKESPEARE 40. THE PORNOGRAPHIC BIBLE 41. THE INDIFFERENCE OF THE HIPPIE 42. THE ONE-MINUTE MILLIONAIRE 43. THE DOG PUNISHER 44. THE TRAP 45. PUTIN ON THE FRITZ 46. GLITTERING TOWERS IN A WAR ZONE 47. PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVES FUCKING ANONYMOUS 48. PROTECT THE BABY 49. OKLAHOMA RAIN 50. DA N-BOMB 51. YORE GAL AIN'T DOODLEY-SQUAT 52. A BOOK THAT ONLY I CAN READ 53. USELESS GENIUSES 54. KANSAS SHEEP-DIP 55. SIGMUND SAYS 56. A STEW OF IRONY 57. ARIZONA STRAWBERRIES 58. MICROSCOPIC WINO 59. THE THIRTY-SIX CHURLS WHO WILL SAVE THE WORLD 60. CREAM OF PROPAGANDA 61. DANDY'S INFERNO 62. PHILADELPHIA BANKROLL 63. SPIRITUAL FREELOADER 64. SALAD DODGER 65. PRESIDENT STEWBUM 66. CRIMINALLY COMPETENT 67. FULL NANAIMO 68. BE YOUR OWN EMPLOYEE 69. TAKE THIS & BUY SOMETHING NICE--I LIKE MY BOYS TO LOOK SHARP 70. CAPTAIN BLACKGUARD 71. NO TIME FOR SURGEONS 72. JOHNNY SAP 73. BILLBOARD ON A THRONE 74. GEORGIA ICE CREAM 75. TROUBLE IS ALL I KNOW 97. 1. A TRAP FOR PROSTITUTES 2. DANTALION WINE 3. A SUBSTANDARD TOUR DE FORCE 4. A LOUSY SUCCESS D'ESTIME 5. THE LITTLE DEAD PONY 6. PUT A LITTLE MORE "AW" IN IT 7. COLORADO KOOL-AID 8. IT'S NOT THE COFFEE--IT'S THE BUNK 9. YESTERDAY IS HERE 10. SEX AND DROOGS 11. ALL I NEED IS THE AIR THAT YOU BREATHE 12. CALIFORNIA PRAYER BOOK 13. PULLING OUT OF COASTAL MARKETS 14. THE BEAST WITH A BILLION EYES 15. THE HOBO SONG 16. STUCK IN THE MIDDLE (AGES) WITH YOU 17. DIE OF THIS ANGER 18. LOW-INTENSITY POLICE STATE 19. ARKANSAS TOOTHPICK 20. WARFARE REFORM 21. YOUR HEALTHY DOG 22. SHE DIDN'T GROW UP, SHE GREW OUT 23. WEST VIRGINIA COLESLAW 24. NAZA 25. EA-2277 26. GYALANA KARMAPA’S RED HAT BEER 27. LITTLE GOD WON’T YOU DANCE WITH ME? 28. ROYALTY—WHAT A CONCEPT 29. THE BLACK ORCHESTRA 30. DIETROLOGIA 31. KING OF THE LAND OF THE DEAD 32. THE MAY 13TH INCIDENT 33. AMOK 34. NOT GUILTY BY REASON OF INANITY 35. THE SUPERFORCE 36. TWILIGHT LANGUGE 37. THE MIND RANCH 38. A DEVICE FOR REGISTERING MEANING 39. MARA’S STREAM 40. AN ENEMA OF THE PEOPLE 41. STUPID POLICY 42. I PUT IT DOWN 43. AN INNOCENT BROAD 44. ASEPTIC CARTOONS 45. VICTOR’S PLIGHT 46. EMPEROR NARCISSUS 47. KNUCKLE WALKING 48. THIN SLOB 49. GUIDED IMAGERY FOR KIDS 50. TALES OF GREEN K 51. SHANTY TRAMP 52. SIGN OF THE BREAST 53. SANTA CLOD 54. MY LOVELY RETRIEVERS 55. MR. BLOWJANGLES 56. THE LINEAMENTS OF GRATIFIED DESIRE 57. THE WATER ROOM 58. ABWEHR 59. ACCEPTABLE FACE 60. ADMASS 61. EKSKUBALAURON 62. BIG FRY 63. PURE GENIUS 64. NIGHT STARVATION 65. COME ALIVE 66. THE SUMMER COUNTRY 67. CRIMINAL RESPONSIBILITY 68. TO BREAK THE MARBLE SHELL 69. ALEATORY STORY 70. WHAT’S IT ALL ABOUT, ARFIE? 71. Z LIST 72. AMERICAN REALITY 73. INDISCRIMINATE PICTURE 74. I ONLY ASKED 75. MEAT ANT 98. 1. YOU MAY ANSWER WITH A WISECRACK or 2. DRUGHEAD STREET OR 3. TINEA PEDES 4. BAN THE BUM 5. WE SHALL ALWAYS SURRENDER 6. THE WOMEN OF BERGEN-BELSEN COUNTY 7. I AM A JELLY-FILLED DOUGHNUT 8. THE BIG ELBOW 9. KUROI KIRI 10. THE BULLY MACHINE 11. GOOD OLD BLIGHT 12. MERRY DAYS INDOOR AND OUT 13. BRAINWEAR 14. BLINKSMANSHIP 15. BRITPAP 16. BUGHOUSE SQUARE 17. I SAT DOWN AND WEPT 18. NOTHING HILL 19. A GENERATION OF CANNIBALS 20. SCRUPULOUS OPPORTUNISTS 21. ROBOT INVECTIVE 22. GOODBYE MR. CHIMP 23. SEA-X 24. 435HZ 25. CONSPICUOUS RESUMPTION 26. HE MADE ME COME 27. PURE FINDERS 28. RIVER OF SHIT 29. FERAL TAX ASSISTANCE 30. BITTEROSO 31. INFECTED PREMISES 32. THROUGH NO FAULT OF MY OWN 33. XENOPHOBIC GUMMERS 34. BIG-STICK-COUNTRY SQUIRES 35. WHERE THE JUKES MINGLE WITH THE KALLIKAKS 36. THE RETURN OF THE NAÏVE 37. NEW WAYS TO WRITE A BESTSELLER FOR THE AMERICAN MARKET 38. BLUE RONDO A LA SMURF 39. THE ORIGINAL 40. COOL WHITE 41. THE BLONDE ASSASSIN 42. HIERONYMOUS POP 43. WHITE TRASH ENCYCLOPEDIA 44. CLARK KENT KILLS LUTHOR 45. NOTHING COMPARES 2 ME 46. ALL ART IS EXAGGGERATION 47. ODD NIGHT 48. INVERNESS COLLEGE 49. WINDOWS 50. AN ENTERTAINING YARN 51. STRENGTH IN NUMBNESS 52. CYBER-CRED 53. THE ANONYMITY OF CASH 54. SNOWMAN MADE OF FROZEN SWEAT 55. HACKETT, MUDGETT AND BLODGETT 56. BUMBLING FATHER 57. I’LL TAKE VANILLA 58. THE ALIENATED CALCULUS OF INSTRUMENTAL RATIONALITY 59. CANDRADE 60. SHITLAND 61. GROOVIE TESTICLES 62. FEAST OF FIRE 63. LOVE & WORK 64. WHAT RUSSIA NEEDS IS A GOOD FIVE-CENT TZAR 65. A VERY SPECIAL EPISODE 66. JIMMY STEWART IS-- HORST WESSEL! 67. FORMERLY EVIL 68. THANK GOD NO ONE NEEDS A WORLD WITH MONEY 69. HERE BE TEENAGERS 70. SORRY TIMES 71. JOY BELL 72. I-199 73. THE LIES OF TROUBLEMAKERS 74. BRAINWASHING IS THE FUTURE 75. SPECIAL GUESTS 99. 1. NOW AIN’T YOU A SPRING DANDY? or 2. NO SHAMEFUL CONFESSION IS EVER ENOUGH or 3. PIMP MY BATMOBILE 4. A TORRENT OF COMEDIC DRIVEL 5. AN ORIFACE YOU CAN’T REFUSE 6. THE DREAM HAUNTERS 7. A VERY ORDINARY EPISODE 8. HECKLED BY RACIST YOBS 9. GREEN ZONE, WHAT’S THAT SECRET YOU’RE KEEPING? 10. THE PSYCHOLOGY OF THE PAWN 11. SLOWER, DOGGIE, HUMP HUMP 12. ANIMA ACE 13. YUM YUM EAT ‘EM UP 14. RIDE FOR PEACE 15. JESUIT PARK 16. THIS IS DEPRESSING 17. YOU CAN WIN 18. THE BALLAD OF BABY BOY MADDOX 19. MONDEGREEN 20. A BILLY CLUB BREAKFAST 21. COULD THIS BE MUJIK? 22. RAPE WHISTLES 23. RAMPANT DIVERSITY 24. SUMMERING 25. IN THE MONTH OF DEATH 26. CHURCH OF PERCODAN 27. SEED RAIN 28. A FIRE MADE OF LIES 29. APOPHENIA 30. JEHOVALLAHSUS 31. PERFUNCTORY SOUNDS 32. THE MOTHERS OF INTERVENTION 33. RESPECTABLE HUMANITY 34. DR. BIGOT 35. INTERPRETATION OF SCREAMS 36. OPUS CONTRA NATURUM 37. SECRET LAND OF BLISS 38. CIA SODA 39. A PERIOD OF CONSEQUENCES 40. I, MURDERER 41. SPETEMBER TENTH 42. THE AESTHETICS OF MOLOCH 43. PHILOSOPHY OF A CHARLATAN 44. FASHION GORILLA 45. A GOOD-LOOKING CORPSE 46. THE LEFT HAND DOESN’T KNOW 47. IDIOT’S GUIDE TO GETTING UP OFF YOUR FAT ASS 48. WHERE IT’S AT 49. SLEEPY HOLLOW TODAY 50. COPYCAT HEROICS 51. YOU ARE GETTING SLEAZY…. 52. BEHOLD, WITHOUT PERCEIVING 53. A NASTY LITTLE CRACK PROBLEM 54. SHIRLEY TEMPLE’S FACE ON JAYNE MANSFIELD’S BODY 55. INTENTIONALLY LOW-ROAD FILMMAKING 56. NO IRONY UNEXPLAINED 57. BELATEDLY EMBRACING LIFE 58. THE GREAT PURPLE DREAM OF CUBA 59. I VITALIS 60. BUSYING OURSELVES TO OUR OWN RUIN 61. WHITE PEOPLE CAN BE FUN 62. SLAVERING CHAVS 63. THE ARMAGEDDON-IS-INEVITABLE CROWD 64. CAPTAIN NIRVANA 65. THE MOST REVOLTING PAGES IN RECENT AMERICAN FICTION 66. YANKEE PREACHER, FRONTIER OUTLAW, CELEBRITY MINSTREL 67. WHO WE THINK WE ARE 68. THE APPEARANCE OF REASONABLE BEHAVIOR 69. BORN-AGAIN AGNOSTICS 70. BOSS HOGG OF BEVERLY HILLS 71. MY GUN TASTES FUNNY 72. AUTHORITARIAN MAVERICK 73. TOP MEN IN THE REAL WORLD GO NATURAL 74.THE NOWHERE MAN WITH THE NOWHERE PLAN 75. THIS THEATRE OF THE WORLD IS UNSAFE 100. 101. 1.KEEPIN’ IT SURREAL or 2. LOOK AT MY SCREAMING FACE or 3. HOMEOPATHIC PLACEBOS or 4. FIGHT THE GREEN MONSTER 5. SAINT JESUS CHRIST 6. THE DETRACTORS 7. ELECTRIC CLIPPERS FOR THE NOSE AND EAR 8. ONLY RECONNECT 9. THE CHURCH OF 33 1/3 10. LIKE FUN 11. ONE LARGE PEANUT WHISTLE 12. NOTHING BUT MONEY 13. NOW DIE 14. THE DECEIVER’S DICTIONARY 15. AN EPIDEMIC OF MANURE 16. A PERPETUAL TARGET OF ABUSE 17. A MADMAN OR SOMETHING WORSE 18. CROAK ON YOUR PREENING VIRTUE 19. SOUR VERSIONS OF THE DREAM 20. AUDACIOUSLY VAGUE 21. THE ONE TRUE STORY 22. STANDING HEAD 23. HEY MR. SOUL 24. MORON CONSERQUENCES 25. THE CONSTITUTION OF SILENCE 26. JOKER VENOM 27. THUG FONT 28. CLOISTER BLACK 29. UNITED STATES OF AMNESIA 30. I WANT CRAZY 31. YOU’VE GOT TO SWALLOW THAT DREAM 32. UNIVERSITY OF MIDNIGHT 33. THE AKT 34. VESPERTILIO 35. MIRACLE, MYSTERY AND AUTHORITY 36. DISRUPTIVE ALTERNATIVES 37. SELLING THE HIPPIE BRAND 38. IMPOTENT REBELS 39. ANTICHRIST ETIQUETTE GUIDE 40. U.S. HEROES 41. THE GREAT AMERICAN BIBLE 42. THE CONSPIRACY DOGS 43. WHITE MINSTREL 44. ESKIMO SHAMAN 45. GRYM THE WARRIOR AND FAFNIR THE WOLF 46. RALPH KRAMDEN, HOMICIDAL MANIAC 47. TRUNK MUSIC 48. JAMBANJA 49. SIMPLICITY ITSELF 50. WALLED CITY OF MADNESS 51. INCORRIGIBLY WEIRD 52. ONE GOOD SENTENCE 53. ISOLATO SPLEEN 54. OUTTELLIGENT 55. HOW I PREPARED MY THREE-YEAR-OLD FOR DEATH 56. THE JIVETOWN FIVE 57. MIND KONTROL TOP 40 58. READ THIS 59. SIMULTANEOUSLY, AT THE SAME TIME 60. SICK CAGES 61. MR. PRESIDENT & HIS ADMINISTRATION 62. ELECTRIC-FREE ISLAND 63. HI MOON 64. REVEREND DEVILLE 65. KK’S KALEIDOSCOPE 66. WHITE CAP 67. CHRIST, VIAGRA AND ME 68. FASCINATING PHALLUS 69. A COMPETE THREE-PART NOVEL 70. IT’S DOOM THAT REALLY COUNTS 71. DEATH SUCKS 72. WHAT MATTERS 73. RELIGIOUS LIES AND NONSENSE 74. MR. RESUME 75. COOL SUITS AND FAMILY VALUES 102. 1. OUR ENEMIES OUR RIGHT TO MOCK US 2. FOR I HAVE SEEN ALL THE ANSWERS or 3. THE COSMOPOLITANS or 4. PRESIDENT CORNBALL 5. WISECRACKING PONTIFF 6. ROBOT HOBO 7. FORCE MAJUERE 8. THE IRON MAJOR 9. NORDIC MAN 10. ARYAN ACE 11. CAPTAIN WHITE 12. GRYM THE VIKING 13. YELLOW PERIL 14. RACE MIXER 15. UNION MAN 16. SCROOGE DOG 17. WEREFOLF MESSIAH 18. SCHIZO CLAUS AND HIS BIPOLAR HEADQUARTERS 19. LADY OF PAIN 20. DRUNK LIGHT TUNA 21. IRREALISM 22. THERE IS NO AWAY 23. LOW FLUCTUATING ASYMMETRY 24. WHAT WOULD OZ DO? 25. WAX & GOLD 26. HAPPY IS THE NEW SAID 27. THE CASE AGAINST PERFECTION 28. GLEISE 581C 29. LOONOLOGY 30. SHOW YOUR NOSE 31. COME INTO THE LIGHT, LOVE 32. AFFLICTED CHURLS 33. THE MEATBALL MIND 34. IMAGINARY APPETITES 35. UNCONTESTED WORKS OF DISSIDENCE 36. INFANTILIST ETHOS 37. GENTLE MARKET TOTALITARIANISM 38. LASTIG DAMAGE 39. DECIMATION 40. THE LIES OF TROUBLEMAKERS 41. MYSTICAL MANIPULATION 42. HOP FOR THE HOMELESS 43. BRUTE MANLINESS 44. CREAKING POLITICAL INSTINCTS 45. TEA FASCISTS 46. FUNDMENTALLY THE SAME 47. THE DISCOMBOBULATION OF ELDERS 48. A TRAIT FOR WHICH INTELLECTUALS ARE NOTORIOUS 49. CONSENSUS METAL 50. SKYDECKER, PHD 51. PAINBALL 52. AN ORIFACE YOU CAN'T REFUSE 53. BEEF CURTAINS 54. HIERONYMOUS POP 55. BITTEROSO 56. XENOPHOBIC GUMMERS 57. THE BIG STICK COUNTRY SQUIRES 58. BILLYCLUB BREAKFAST 59. JESUIT PARK 60. RIVER OF DREAD 61. A KICK IN THE BUTT 62. A TRACK IN THE DIRT 63. AFTERNOON EVERYBODY 64. AH PLEASE PAPA 65. AMARILLO 66. ANY COW 67. NAZI FRIES 68. PERVY FURSUITS 69. THE VERY AFRAID 70. I WANT ONLY MY SON 71. NEVER BEFORE SEEN BLOOPERS 72. THE GREAT PURPLE DREAM 73. SACRED HECK 74. WHISKEY BUSINESS 75. PATHETIC DEFERENCE TO TELEVISION 103. 1. STOLEN MOMENTS 2. SCHIZO ABE or 3. JESUS, VIGILANTE or 4. EXCESSIVE AND SPURIOUS EMOTION 5. SHANTY TRAMP 6. CIGAR SMOKING ZOMBIES 7. SIGN OF THE BREAST 8. THE LINEAMENTS OF GRATIFIED DESIRE 9. QUERULOUS JIG 10. DRAB PELT 11. SOME DICKHEAD ACADEMIC 12. THE VERY SPECIAL EPISODES 13. THE DREAM HAUNTERS 14. ATATURK'S FLAG 15. THE HOT AND BOTHERED 16. BEYOND THE EGG 17. YOU'RE SOAKING IN IT 18.BLACK SEMINOLE SLAVE REBELLION 19. HEAVENLY KINGDOM OF GREAT PEACE 20. PROPAGANDA BY DEED 21. NOW IS THE TIME 22. ESCAPE FROM THE THE GAY LAND OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO MORALS 23. TOUGH GUYS WITH SOMETHING TO HIDE 24. SQUEAKY-CLEAN SUCKERS WITH DEEP POCKETS 25. CORRUPT COOKIES 26. THE YAR-HAR-HAR SCHOOL 27. INDOCTRINATING OUR OWN DESTROYERS 28. NEW-OLD ECOPESSIMISM 29. EMMITT TILL, SEXUAL HARASSER 30. CAR CHASES ABOUT SOMETHING 31. IDEALISTIC DOUBLETALK 32. EDUCATORS OF THE PSYCHIC CONCIOUSNESS 33. THE SOMEWHAT STRANGE IS SHARPLY ALIEN 34. THEATRICAL REPRESENTATIONS 35. CATEGORIES BASED ON PSYCHOLOGICAL VULNERABILITIES 36. THE MENTAL LIFE OF THE CROWD 37. MORON'S CALAMITY 38. GENETIC BULLY 39. PEDANTIC CONDESCENDING TWADDLE 40. UNDISPUTED MASTER OF AGITATION 41. ORDERLY DESIGN IN THE CREATION 42. CIVLIZATIONAL DESTRUCTION 43. INTERNALIZED FRAMES 44. DISCREPANT MEANINGS 45. RESPECTABLE HUMANITY 46. INFERIOR ELEMENTS 47. THE ONLY REMAINING PRIMITIVE SOCIETY 48. SOOTHING EXPEDIENTS 49. THE SOFT GLEAM OF THE COMICAL 50. GENUINE THOUGHT 51. MISOGYNY CHIC 52. BORED SOPHISTICATES 53. ALL-NEW RANCORS 54. THE AESTHETICS OF MOLOCH 55. WEST OF THE HUDSON 56. A PRETZEL OF ASININITY 57. HATEFUL LEMMINGS 58. PERVERSE, ANGRY AND DEEPLY SAD 59. FASCISTIC SMUGFEST 60. GOD HIT THE WORLD AND THE WORLD HIT BACK 61. GUMSNAPPING FUCK-ME HO 62. IRONY, SCATOLOGY AND SAVAGERY 63. TOY ATHENS 64. THE FAMOUS CROWD 65. SLAUGHTER MAN 66. WAKE UP AND LIVE 67. THE SEMEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD 68. EXPANDO GROIN 69. JUNKIE AND THE JOHNNY CABLES 70. BUG DIP 71. DIPSTICK 72. DROSOPHILA & THE FRUIT FLIES 73. BUILDING 19 74. CHICKEN POX 75. PETER PRESSKIT AND THE VOCATIONAL SONS 104. 1. NEW PROOFS OF WHAT I ALREADY KNOW or 2. DISRUPTIVE ALTERNATIVES or 3. THE LYSERGIC CLOWN KILLERS or 4. CONSERVATIVE LIFE COACH 5. WISECRACKING SIDEKICKS 6. LESSONS IN CHICANERY 7. THE STORY IN THE MIND 8. APOSTLE OF MEDIOCRITY 9. MESSAGES ABOUT ILLEGAL DEMONSTRATIONS 10. THE COLD FEELING AT THE END OF THE TROUT’S NOSE 11. THE BEST-SELLING DESIGN TEMPLATE 12. COINCIDENTALLY INTERSECTING LIVES 13. A SERIES OF TOUGH BREAKS 14. ONE HUMILIATION AFTER ANOTHER 15. INVENTED EXCESSES 16. MASTER OF MASSCULT 17. THE CONSTITUTION OF SILENCE 18. PUBERTY MANUALS 19. TOO SMART FOR THE ROOM 20. HATE PATROL 21. EARTH HOGS 22. THE INJUSTICE LEAGUE 23. FALLEN APE 24. TRASHOMON 25. ADULT CHILD OF VEGETARIANS 26. ANGRY CAMPERS 27. THE ANTI-ENTITIES 28. THE SUPER-DEPRESSED MEN 29. CAPE DOES NOT ENABLE USER TO FLY 30. YOUR NEW ENEMIES 31. SMASH UGLY 32. DANGER DANGER 33. MIDGET DOWN 34. APPROACH LAUGHTER 35. SOLAR TRIGGER 36. SPOILED PRIESTS 37. JOEY HEROIN 38. IMAGINARY PORTRAITS 39. PORTION CONTROL 40. ANTI BONO 41. ZEALOT ZONE 42. TONE-DEAF COWBOYS 43. THE ACORN PANCAKES 44. THE HORSE APPLES 45. THE ASS HARVESTERS 46. THE BEVERLY HELLBILLIES 47. THE BOXCARS 48. THE COMA BUMS 49. THE COOL WHITES 50. THE COWBOY LEPERS 51. THE DANCE CRASHERS. 52. THE DANCE OF JOY 53. THE FLOATING OUTHOUSE LOGS 54. THE HEAD! 55. THE LEATHER BOYZ 56. THE LOST COYOTES 57. THE MASTER CYLINDER 58. THE ONE-EYED HILLBILLIES 59. THE ORNERY KIYOTES 60. THE OWLHOOTS 61. THE POTATO-SEED EATERS 62. THE PUSHBROOM ZOMBIES 63. THE RED DEVILS 64. THE TOURETTE-DART BAND 65. THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR 66. THE UNDERDOGS 67. I, MURDERER 68. MYTHIC SEPTEMBER 10TH 69. SECRET LAND OF BLISS 70. THE MOTHERS OF INTERVENTION 71. DR. BIGOT 72. MEN LIKE GODS 73. CAR THAT RUNS ON BLOOD SUGAR 74. MORAL CONVICTIONS DIFFERENT THAN MY OWN 75. SOME STRANGENESS IN PROPORTION 105. 1. INDIGNITY HEAPED UPON INDIGNITY or 2. GANGSTER POLITICS or 3. COLONY COLLAPSE DISORDER 4. AN ISOLATED MISTAKE 5. FALSE TALES OF HEROISM 6. WHINEATHON 7. PATRIARCH IN SHEEP’S CLOTHING 8. COMPLEX 2030 9. RASCALLY AUTHENTICITY 10. BELOW THE POETRY LINE 11. ANTI-INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY LAW 12. $15.46+ 13. A PROUD MOTHWALLET 14. FAT OFFICE 15. LONGUERS AND LAZINESS 16. CYCLE OF ALARMIST PERCEPTIONS 17. FRAMING CONSENSUS AS CONTROVERSY 18. THE BRIDGES OF MADMAN COUNTY 19. SEE ALSO ALSO SEE SEE ALSO 20. SOWN GRAOWN ADULTS 21. ORPHAN POP JITTERS 22. BASIC ATTITIDINAL CHANGE 23. TIME VOMIT 24. NATURAL NECESSITIES FOR THE BETTERMENT OF LIFE 25. FASCINATING PERVERSION 26. WHITE MINSTREL 27. RARE FOR A REASON 28. IDIOT DISNEYLAND 29. ME THE STAR ON ALL YO LOCAL STATIONS 30. WE ALREADY HAD THAT 31. ALPHA SLEDS 32. TOTALLY NORMAL DUDE 33. STUNT NONFICTION 34. NEOLITHIC CRAVING TO GLOAT 35. CLEAN JUSTICE FOR ALL 36. CORNBALL BLATHER 37. THE P.C. PROCEDURAL 38. THE GRAFFITI-MURDER CONTINUUM 39. FOLK PORNOGRAPHY 40. PLEASANT SUNDAY AFTERNOON SOCIETY 41. TINY SINESTRO 42. CAFE NOIR 43. CENSUS OF HALLUCINATIONS 44. LYSERGIC ACID REFLUX 45. NECROTIZING FASCISMUS 46. DOOFUS REVIEWS 47. ANTIKYTHERA MECHANISM 48. SPLENDORS AND MISERIES OF THE PROSTITUTE 49. EDGE OF THE MATERIAL WORLD 50. QUEENING ALL THE PAWNS 51. JESUS DETECTIVE 52. SLEEPY ARROGANCE 53. DAMN THE SUN 54. MY MONKEY 55. THE WORLD DRUNK 56. KING BABBY 57. ART CONCIOUS 58. SONIC CESSPOOL 59. SURREAL KILLER 60. TRAIN TO NOWHERE 61. TURTLE HEAD 62. GET OFF ME PAW, YER CRUSHIN MY SMOKES 63. VIRGINIA CITY 64. VOLTRON FORCE 65. SQUIRREL BRAIN PIE 66. WHY COUSINS SHOULDN'T MARRY 67. WINDSHIELD 68. WINE SPO-DE-O-DEE 69. YAK 70. YEE HAW 71. YIPEE SKIPEE 72.YQCA 73. A BOY HAS NEVER WEPT NOR DASHED A THOUSAND KIM 74. ANY MAJOR DUDE 75. ARNOLD THE PIG 75. SURVEY SAYS 106 1. TURN TO FACE THE STRANGE TASERS or 2. PRETTY SOON YOU’RE GOING TO BE OUT OF IT or 3. THE MORMONISM THING or 4. OSCAR THE DEATH CAT 5. AS YET UNDREAMED-OF IN THE WORLD 6. LAND OF GENERICA 7. PERMANENT OCTOBER 8. SEPARATION OF CHOOCH AND STATE 9. BLABBER AND SMOKE 10. INDIAN BUMMER 11. BOOGER BEAR 12. BUZZARD ON A BUZZSAW 13. CALL ME RUSTY 14. CARE BEAR STARE 15. CASA LOMA 16. I DON’T CARE 17. CHUG 'EM DOWN 18. CINCINNATI CHILIDAWG 19. WAXEN SIMULACRA 20. (IN)FAMY 21. COOTIE GARAGE 22. THE EIGHT HUMAN TARGETS 23. ESCAPE FROM DEAMLAND 24. CRUSHING YOUR HEAD 25. VERITY 26. DEADBEAT DAD AND HIS SOON-TO-BE-STARVING NEGLECTED 27. DEMON DOGS 28. DINGOS STOLE MY BABY 29. DIRTBAG 30. DRIVIN ON NINE 31. EXCLAMATION POINT AND THE HYSTERIANS 32. FAST AND FURIOUS 33. FIFTY DOLLARS AND TIME SERVED 34. FIRE BAD 35. FIREBOX 36. FLOWERS AND GRIEF 37. FOUR ROSES AND A THORN 38. FROZEN PIPES 39. FUN IS FUN 40. WIRED COWBOYS 41. GRAB ASS

dimenno	Feb 22 2011, 10:36 PM Post #2314
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	106 42. ARMYTOWN 43. HEAT MISR 44. HEAVY METAL THUNDER 45. HEY EDISON 46. RAINTREE COUNTY 47. RAISE THE ROOF 48. RANDOM CANYON 49. RED MAN 50. RIVERBOAT GAMBLER 51. THE INSTITUTIONALIZED CULTURE OF SYCHOPHANCY 52. A BYWORD FOR TEDIUM 53. STICKY PARTS 54. STREETS OF LAREDO 55. SUMP PUMP 56. VON DUTCH 57. THUNDERCATS HO 58. TONTO'S BROOD 59. TRAIN I RIDE 60. TURTLE POWER 61. DEPARTMENT 9000 62. MR. STINKY POOP 63. EXPENSIVE PANTOMIME 64. CRACKING PACE 65. THE AMERICAN ART 66. PORN FACE 67. AUTUMN’S FALL 68. THE WHITE HOLE 69. POETRY PALS 70. ANY MAJOR DUDE 71. MAN UP 72. SLOW AND STEALTHY EROSION OF INDEPENDENCE 73. EMERGING CONTAMINANTS 74. COMPASSION AT RISK 75. SMARMATHON 107. 1. NEW ENEMIES OF FUN or 2. PELEAGIC IMMENSITIES OF POLITICAL ORATORY or 3. THE ELECTRIFICATION OF ALL MANKIND or 4. TODAY WE STOP THIS WORD 5. FATTY LEVIATHAN 6. DERANGED ACUITY 7. PACIFICA ARCHIPELAGO 8. DIGITAL BROWNSHIRTS 9. CALCULATED KABUKI PRESS CONFERENCE 10. INCESTUOUS AMPLIFICATION 11. PHONY INTERNATIONALISM 12. NONSTOP SOFT PORN 13. THIS IS A JOB FOR FRAGILE X 14. DUST, POSTPONED 15. DISGRACEFUL VILLAINY 16. WHIZZ AND WHOOZLE 17. A COMMONWEALTH OF MALIGNANTS 18. NO BUSINESS LIKE SHOAH BUSINESS 19. A SPIRIT WHITE AND THIN 20. BUNGALOWDESH 21. THE MAN WITH A MILLION DOLLAR IDEA FOR A MOVIE 22. VISCERAL REACTIONS OF ELDERLY CHIMPS 23. INCARNATION 24. THE MAIN 25. BE LIKE THE BIG BOYS 26. MOTEL MONEY MURDER MADNESS 27. PITBULL DEFENDERS 28. AGAINST THE GROIN 29. PRINCE TOMOHITO THE ALCOHOLIC 30. A MAN OF POOR CHARACTER 31. MR. SEX 32. DR. GOOGLE 33. THE VICTIM’S COOKBOOK 34. CONSPICUOUS PRESUMPTION 35. AN ABANDONES AND MALIGNANT HEART 36. TWO MILLION DUST MITES EATING YOUR DEAD SKIN 37. CRUELTY-FREE ANIMAL HEAD 38. HEROLAND 39. WHITE PEOPLE 40. DESTINED TO BE A CLASSIC 41. BURNT SIENNA 42. A MORE INCLUSIVE ELITE 43. TOTALITARIAN MAGAZINE 44. INSANE SUPPOSITIONS 45. MATERIALISM DISGUISED AS PROGRESSIVISM 46. MOKRYYE DELA 47. FERAL STREET 48. AMERICA’S KULAKS 49. PLANET OF THE DOGS 50. THE SILENT APE 51. GEE! I COULDA HAD A JIHAD! 52. GHOSTSTAR 53. SEMIOTIC MONKEY 54. NO AFTERLIFE 55. OSWALD COLLEGE 56. YOKEL COSMOPOLIS 57. HEARD YA MISSED ME, I’LL DESTROY YA 58. CUTPURSE PANTOMIME 59. FIGHTING BOREDOM 60. BOY EATS GIRL 61. HONESTY MAN 62. NE TOWN 63. PIMP AND CIRCUMSTANCE 64. WHY DO WE CRY CRAZY TEARS? 65. EASTERN INTELLECTUALS SHOULD GO WITH THE FLOW 66. THE PATRIOTIC PRESS 67. THE SUMP KING 68. SNEAKY LITTLE MUSTACHE MAN 69. THE CHURCH OF NOSMO KING 70. HAPPY THE SLAVE 71. TAXONOMY OF EPHEMERA 72. KING OF THE DOGS 73. MAKE ‘EM DIE 74. DANCE FLOOR SHINY UNDER JUNKIES 75.NEW COOT 108. 1. NOW IS THE CHRISTMAS OF OUR DISCONTENT or 2. A WORK OF THE DEVIL TO DESTROY PEOPLE’S RELIGIOUS BELIEFS or 3. FILL YOUR DEN WITH LIQUOR USING FOOD STAMPS! or 4. AN ERA OF STRANGE VICISSITUDES 5. HIGH-INTENSITY COMMODIFICATION 6. BRAND NAME CHIMP 7. JESUS, DETECTIVE 8. PROGRESSIVE TOTALITARIANISM 9. THE TINFOIL HEADGEAR GANG 10. THE TAXONOMY OF DOUBT 11. THE ATLAS OF SMALLTOWN 12. AMERICON 13. THE IDWEST 14. BUM SCARE 15. THE WALLS OF EVERLASTING ROME 16. NOT THE EPICENTER 17. SCIENCE’S TABOOS CONFIRMED 18. THE FAR SHORES OF COMICANA 19. TRAVELS WITH BORIS IN SEARCH OF COMMUNISM 20. ALL BALD GENIUSES ARE MAD AND BAD 21. THE WORLD IS FULL OF FABULOUS FREAKS 22. EVERY DAY THERE’S A NEW CRISIS 23. PEOPLE SIMPLY VENERATE FASCIST VIGALANTES 24. BARKING MOONBAT 25. EXUBERANT HORROR 26. WAVE OF DISMEMBERMENTS 27. WINTER READING 28. WILDERSTAND 29. MR. BABBY 30. THE EVERYTHING MAN 31. MARK, MASTER 32. THE HISTORY OF WHORING IN AMERICA 33. RIPPING THE WORLD AWAY 34. ALIEN SEX SYMBOL 35. AN ACCIDENTAL PARODY OF POVERTY 36. THE BOOK I SHOULD HAVE WRITTEN 37. JETSON’S DILDO 38. RISE WIHOUT 39. A CONSPIRACY IN LOW PLACES 40. YOUR WORLD WITH ITS CARELESS TREASURES 41. A WORK OF NONFICTION 42. BYELIYE PYATNA 43. MORE WONDERS OF THE INVISIBLE WORLD 44. JOURNALISM THAT ISN’T 45. FEAR OF MEAT 46. VISIONARIES OF THE AMERICAN SHADOW CULTURE 47. JAHILLIYA 48. ROAD TO BRAVE NEW WORLD 49. ELECTROCUTION BY MIKE STAND 50. FIST-TASTIC 51. DISINTEGRATION NOW 52. GRUMBLE LINE 53. FLEETING EXPLETIVES 54. CAUSAL FRIDAYS 55. LAW-ABIDING MONKEY 56. MR. ALCATRAZ 57. JOHNNY RESUME 58. AMPUTEES ROADSHOW 59. ACT GREEN 60. THE FORCE OF HUMAN WEAKNESS 61. SHE MAY CALL YOU UP TONIGHT 62. DIFFERENT MIRAGES 63. I’M NOT DEAD 64. THE FUCK APPLES 65. THE BUM IN THE BASEMENT 66. AN EPIC POEM ABOUT MY NEAR-FATAL CAR ACCIDENT 67. THE BONOBO MEN 68. KURDS DIE THE DARNDEST DEATHS 69. STATE OF THE ART PRIMITIVE 70. THERE ARE SEVEN LEVELS 71. THE EVIL GOOD 72. HAPPYMAN 73. SPIT IT OUT, JOHNNY 74. MUSLIM X 75. THE SPECIAL TREATMENT 109. 1. A SQUALID PROCESSION OF VAIN FOOLS or 2. PRINCIPLED, IDEOLOGICAL VULGARITY or 3. FEAR IS WINNING or 4. ZIP-A-DEE-DADA 5. A 30-OUGHT-SIX FOR REACHING OUT 6. FALSIFIED STORIES 7. OH “NO”—IT’S THE IRONIC SEVEN! 8. MR. ATOMIC FIREBALL 9. BE KIND TO WEALTHY STRANGERS 10. NECROTIZING FASCISMUS 11. WE APOLOGIZE FOR ANY INCOHERENCE 12. GOD IN THE EGGPLANT 13. THE NUTBALL BOX 14. CANNIBAL ISLAND 15. I ONLY SAY THIS BECAUSE I LOATHE YOU 16. APOCALYPTIC DIPSOMANIACS 17. SPIKED WITH ETHER BEFORE YOUR EYES 18. UTOPIA NOVELTY COMPANY 19. THE RUB OF THE BRUSH 20. TOTALITARIANS R US 21. POLICE CHARACTERS 22. AN INVITATION TO A YOKING PARTY 23. MAGIC IS CHEATING 24. NO BUFFOON 25. CHANNELED THROUGH LARD 26. I DO NOT HAVE PROPHETIC INSIGHT 27. A NEW HAND 28. A WRETCHED TRAMP 29. A CLOSED SEASON ON GAB 30. A VERY UNPOPULAR REQUEST 31. W-WHY D-DOES MY CHILD STUTTER? 32. SUMMER DEAD ZONE 33. WORLD VEGETABLE 34. GURNING BAG LADIES 35. NETWORKS OF IDEOLOGICAL CADRES 36. ACCIDENTAL GESTURES 37. COMMODITY-BASED OLIGARCHY 38. TOTEMIC WORSHIP OF VIRILITY 39. TO KNOW EVERYTHING IS TO DO NOTHING 40. GRANDIOSE SOBS 41. THE FRENCH CUFF CROWD 42. QUEASY STREET 43. ROASTED HOGCHOKERS 44. CORROSIVE FOREIGN INFLUENCES 45. AN ORGY OF COINCIDENCES AND ARBITRARY SWITCHEROOS 46. WONDERFUL GARGOYLES 47. INTOLERABLE ACCENTS 48. CHILD LEFT BEHIND 49. MANNERED INGENUOUSNESS 50. POTENCY IN ABSURDITY 51. FRENZIED ADVOCATES OF ODD IDEAS 52. A SATURNALIA OF FREE SPEECH 53. ATTACK OF WEIRDNESS 54. TELLINGLY ODD JUXTAPOSITIONS 55. AVOID NAMING TRUTH 56. SATAN’S PLAN TO DESTROY THE U.S. 57. COMMON SENSE, DANCING 58. THE BOOK OF MIRRORS 59. RESTATEMENT OF THE OBVIOUS 60. MEAT-EATING SPONGE 61. PROPHET LOOKING BACKWARDS 62. THE POWER OF BOREDOM 63. AWFUL KNOFEL 64. LAST OF THE DANCING GYPSY BEARS 65. HARSH, COLD AND PHONY 66. DEPRESSING GIRL TALK 67. THE EDUCATION OF A FILTHY PROVINCIAL HICK 68. IDIOSYNCRATIC EXCELLENCES 69. A VACCINATION AGAINST WANKERY 70. HACKWORDS 71. THE COMPASSIONATE MASTER 72. ARENA CHIMPS 73. SHADOW STUDIES 74. THE NIGHTMEN 75. MURDEROUSLY DEPRESSED CLOWN 110. 1. FEATHERWEIGHT HOMILIES or 2. STICK-FIGURE PAGEANTRY or 3. INDISTINGUISHABLE IDEAS or 4. INVESTMENTS IN ANTIQUARIAN BODIES OF KNOWLEDGE 5. JOHNNY ACIDSEED 6. THE NICEST WHITE MEN EVER 7. GOD OF THE WILD BONOBOS 8. REINCARNATING WITHOUT GOVERNMENT PERMISSION 9. APOTHEOSIS OF PROFANITY 10. KILLING A MAN TOO DEAD 11. CAUTION: HEARTBURN DEAD AHEAD 12. YANKEE WHITE ACCESS 13. KOOLAID ZOMBIE 14. CORNERED HEROES 15. CASINOS, SUPERMARKETS AND WHOREHOUSES 16. A POTEMKIN FEEL 17. TOO ENERGETIC A FRIENDSHIP 18. VULTURE FUNDS 19. UNSUSPECTING PUNTERS 20. A BIG BASS DRUM BANGED ON BY A CLOWN 21. UP GETS YOU NOWHERE 22. A NONEXISTANT VISTORY OVER EVANESCENT FOES 23. DISAPPEARING DACHSHUNDS 24. A SATANIC DETERGENT BOX 25. DIVERSIFIED UNANIMITY 26. SHAKE HANDS WITH AN INFIDEL! 27. CRETIN DETECTOR 28. HOMETOWN HIPSTERS 29. ME BIG INJUN 30. LUXURY GHOST TOWNS 31. EUPHEMISTIC CONTRITION 32. THE POWER OF SCORPIONS TO TORMENT 33. ANACHARCIS CLOOTS 34. TROJAN PANDA 35. EASY AND SLICK 36. SNOOTY SPORTS 37. PRETTY PINK PUDENDAS 38. NEIGHBORHOOD-FRIENDLY ANNIHILATION 39. A MATRIX OF LIVING THOUGHT 40. FAT BABIES HAVE NO PRIDE 41. BLACK HISTORY BUS 42. SEPARATE INCARNATION 43. TOXIC INANITION 44. MR. FUNNY 45. PASS THE MIGHTY WATERFALL 46. PURITAN ORGASMS 47. THE DOWNTOWN FAMILY 48. HOORAY FOR JOY 49. THE DEATH STORE 50. EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW 51. DESTROY ALL BOOKS 52. SCOTTIE IRISH 53. FAKE TEARS OF MYRRH 54. FORCES OF VIOLENCE CALLED LOVE 55. THE TERRIBLE CRYSTAL 56. REALITIES OF ANIMAL MOTION 57. DEBBIE DALLAS 58. HOUSEHOLD NAMES 59. MADDOXLAND 60. THE WORLD-MACHINE 61. PROJECT MALLRAT 62. CHIMPY, GOODWOLF AND BADDOG 63. MR. PUBERTY 64. CRUEL VETO PEN 65. ANGRY WISDOM 66. DAGGER STAB LEGEND 67. CAPTAIN RAIN 68. HUNTER’S MOON 69. L’IL CHOCOLATE 70. LITTLE RED ROASTER 71. HONEST, EXACT AND UNDECEIVED 72. A BOOK I WISH SOMEONE WOULD WRITE 73. PEDANTICMAN 74. THE BAD BOOK 75. THIS IS FOR THE MASTER 111. 1. FERAL CONSUMERISM or 2. SLOPPY, UNDIFFERENTIATED EMPATHY or 3. FIREWORKS AND PARADES or 4. LET UNCONQUERABLE GLADNESS DWELL 5. THE ALCOHOLIC BEARS 6. WITH AN LSD GIRLFRIEND 7. HIDEY-HOLE CAVERN 8. THE STATIONARY ROASTER 9. TROLLEY HOBOES IN TRAMPLAND 10. THE SLAVE PLANTATION 11. THE PERFECTLY ORDINARY INDIAN BURIAL MOUND 12. THE HUMAN ZOO 13. TYPEWRITING MONKEYS 14. HIT THE SIMPLETON WITH BASKETBALLS 15. PRESIDENT BRYLL 16. A PANICKY ROBOT 17. HAIR-GROWN TOMATOES 18. MARRIED TO THE MOUSE 19. BULLETPROOF WITCH 20. PHYSICAL MONEY 21. TOXIC BRAIN 22. DOYLE, GEDNEY & ABRAMS 23. LOSERMAN 24. THE PRESENT DAY 25. MADNESS FOR NEW TIMES 26. HIDDEN ANYTOWN 27. THAT DARN SCAT 28. A DOOMED UPRISING 29. CYBERNATION 30. MEG DEEMER 31. OMICIDE 32. SON OF BOSS 33. SERIOUSLY NEGRO 34. FATE’S BOOK 35. DISTORTION DAYS 36. HANDBOOK OF EVERYDAY LIFE 37. I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT 38. HILLBILLY LOGIC 39. THE ENGINEER’S CHILDREN 40. TAE CHT 41. PORNOGRAPH 42. DOMINANT FRAME 43. ACTION DOG 44. I AM FIRE 45. IN THE INTEREST OF FULL DISCLOSURE 46. THE BOOK OF PAISANO QUOTES 47. PEASANT OF FUNNY HA-HA 48. FORESEEN CONCLUSIONS 49. ACID DOG 50. THE SUGAR CUBE RIDE 51. CRASSLAND 52. BLAZING SWORD 53. THE CHOCOLATE BEAU 54. MR. NG 55. AWAY WITH WORDS 56. WHO WANTS TO BE HAPPY FOREVER? 57. WW 2.1 58. 0.618 59. 98.1 60. 2SD 61. O WIZARD! ONE ORDER OF CHAOS! 62. THE GHOST THIRTEEN 63. 78 PER CENT ARE MEDIOCRE 64. VOLUME ELEVEN 65. ONE FOOT IN GLORY LAND 66. 1984: NOBODY TOLD ME 67. 15 SECONDS 68. TOP TEN RECORD SHOP 69. SECOND ORDER EVENTS IN AMERICAN HISTORY 70. SIX-TEN 71. THE PERIOD OF BEING 26 72. THE 14 WORDS 73. NSC 5412 74. $5.85 75. 335 112. 1. PARTIAL CHAOS or 2. A NOCTIVAGOUS STRUMPETOCRACY or 3. MYSTIC ARPARTHEID or 4. ALERT THE PRESS 5. MR. PLAYBOY 6. GORYLAND 7. MOUNTAINS O’ MADNESS 8. CHIMP-BAITING WITH WOLVES 9. CUSHY QUILL 10. THE MAKING MANIFEST OF ALL THAT IS HIDDEN 11. THE NOISY TRUTH 12. DHARMA KINGS 13. FIFTY DOLLAR GAS CARD 14. BABY MADE A BOOM-BOOM 15. MY PAL’S AUTISTIC KID 16. TUFF GUY HARDCORE SENSATIONS 17. CHECK OUT THE ASS ON FATTY 18. THOR’S EVER-LOVING HAMMER 19. GRANDPA’S INAPPROPRIATE REMARKS 20. THE HEAD DRIFTS TOWARD THE BOTTOM 21. SHINE BOX 22. HUCKLEBERRY HELLHOUND 23. CASUAL VIBRATIONS 24. THE VOMIT STOOGES 25. MINOR CHORES 26. THREE MOES NAMES GUY 27. COOCH PALACE 28. COMMODORE BITCH 29. MR. THE DOG 30. JOYOUS LOWER CHAMPION 31. MEAT WHISTLE 32. LAUGHING CARROT 33. MUTTON DAGGER 34. CORKY WRECKS THE DRIVER’S ED CAR 35. FIST PALACE 36. DRUNKEN DONUTS 37. THE NEW BREED OF SCUMBAG WHO CAN’T FIGHT WITHOUT A WEAPON 38. CLARK KRYPTONITE AND THE KETAMINE FIVE 39. YELPS OF DELIGHT 40. ROBOT SPYMASTER 41. SHALLOW END 42. THE MICROBEAL ELITE 43. WORK IS PUNISHMENT FOR NOT BEING BORN RICH 44. SONGS THE ALIENS TAUGHT US 45. GOVERNMENTAL NOVELS, INC. 46. SNOTNOSE MCPUNQUE 47. DISCONFORMING EVIDENCE 48. PROSTHELYTIZE 49. SPINNING CIRCUMSTANTIAL EVIDENCE INTO A CONSPIRATORIAL WEB 50. OPPORTUNISTIC INFESTATIONS OF FREE EXPRESSION 51. NORMAL SORROW 52. NO CHOAD LEFT BEHIND 53. MR. DEATHIE GOES TO LETHE 54. I HOPE YOU WILL REMEMBER ME 55. FUSY 56. DELUDED APES 57. LIKE FALLING SUGAR 58. THE ADDICT MAGAZINE 59. ZEITGEIST HEIST 60. MINDFUL VIOLENCE 61. FIRE UP THE DUH 62. GRANDIOSE POORMOUTH 63. MORE THAN SEX 64. THE ROAD TO SUCK 65. FAST COMFORT 66. OLD MAN CAN’T 67. A FADDISH SLOGAN OF THE COGNOSCENTI 68. WHAT MILLIONS WANT 69. TRAINING WHEELS FOR ATHEISTS 70. THE POETRY OF CONFUSION 71. SEE HOW YOU LIKE IT 72. TECHNOLOGICAL THIRD EYE 73. NO MATTER IN THE VOID 74. EXORCIZING PENROD 75. GIVING YOU MOTOWN INSTEAD OF THE FALL 113. 1. THE SANCTIONED FANTASY or 2. HOW DYING SAVED MY LIFE or 3. CURE FOR INANITY or 4. RESTLESS GNAT: UNITED STATES 2012-2060 5. BEAR VS. FAT MAN PIE-EATING CONTEST 6. CROW FINN 7. MR. DEATHSTAR 8. OH, I’M TIRED 9. PUNKS DIE 10. UH-OH LAND 11. WORLD O’ SHIT 12. BANAL SEQUITURS 13. THE CONSERVATIVE SUPERMEN 14. THE DRINING OF THE SOUL 15. HELL HAS VICTORIES 16. PERSUASIVE COERCION 17. HYPNO-PATSY 18. SERPENT MESSIAH 19. D.I.D. BAILEY 20. DIME STORE NIHILISM 21. ASHES OF THE PLANET EARTH 22. FANILIAR DOG 23. CHURCH OF HELL 24. SYNTHETIC COURTESY 25. THE RUBBER SHEET BRIGADE 26. THE FLATTERY OF POSTERITY 27. BOOK OF LITERARY LIES 28. THE MULTINATIONAL VIRUS 29. CAMBIO 30. BLACK PEPPER COWBOY BONE 31. PRIMITIVIZATION OF THE WHOLE PERSONALITY 32. CATHARSIS THE CAT AND HERMENEUTICS THE MOUSE 33. INFAMOUS 34. THE AGONY OF THE FEET 35. THE TOYS OF AGE 36. BRAND THE GREENFLY 37. LET THE LIQUOR DO THE TALKING 38. THE NEW BOOK 39. THE ANTI-ROCK EQUATION 40. THIS MAJESTICAL ROOF 41. SHOOT DOWN VENUS 42. SLIPPING INTO PARANOIA 43. THE YOUNG HEGELIANS 44. ALL FORM: A FICTION 45. YESTON 46. HEAVYTOWN BREWERY 47. ALCOHOLIC FUGUE 48. THE JUDAS SYNDROME 49. PEOPLE FROM TV 50. FIREBALL ANOMALIES 51. VILLAGE PSYCHOTIC 52. THE MAGELLENIC CLOUDS 53. EMOTIONAL ALBINO 54. THE WORLD IS JUST A LITTLE TOWN 55. SCOOBY DOUCHE 56. A PLACE WHERE EVEN SQUARES CAN HAVE A BALL 57. THE PILE 58. USEFUL IDIOT GHOUL GIRL 59. THE COMMERCIALLY MEDIATED DREAM WORLD 60. AFFREREMENT 61. THE BIG STUPE 62. INVISIBLE FURIES 63. THE BIG MAN OF HIS DAY 64. DEGENERATES RUN WILD 65. MISERY GANGS 66. PROLETOWN 67. WHAT DID I DO? 68. SOME POOR SWEET WOMAN’S ANGEL CHILD 69. MISS VICTIM 70. KILLJOY 71. MOONBATMAN 72. BRAND TERRORISM 73. FREAK DADDY 74. WHY I KILL 75. DROP A LOAD AND YOU’LL BE SITTING ON TOP OF THE WORLD 114. 1. EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW IS IN COMIC BOOKS or 2. APES ON A TREADMILL or 3. AUTOMATICALLY REJECT OUTSIZES or 4. THE IRONY CURTAIN 5. CHALLENGE YOUR FRIENDS! 6. HEAVEN HILL 7. TOUCH-ME-NOT GIRL 8. THE POST-MEN 9. THE BLUE NOTEBOOK 10. FOX POPULISM 11. GOOD DRUGS GONE BAD 12. THE RETROPLEX 13. FASCINATING VIOLENCE 14. A PEST TO FARMERS 15. THE MAMMY’S CURSE 16. PI BANDITS 17. YOUNG MAN TROUBLE 18. FACETIOUS CITATIONS 19. BODED FROM THE SKY 20. LASER BOO 21. NETOPOLIS 22. ATOMIC BUMMER 23. GOLD AND SINNERS RECONCILED 24. ASSE CHOCOLATE 25. CRAZY BONES 26. LEADERSHIP PORNOGRAPHY 27. YEAH, SURE 28. LAWYER TALK 29. OLD MAN RUTHLESS 30. STINK TANK LOGIC 31. THE ENEMY OF THE MOMENT 32. A GUY CALLED SATAN 33. SECRET LOCUTIONS 34. AMERICAN TIBERIUS 35. BEEF ROPE 36. DEATH, INC. 37. METROPOTAMIA 38. A PRACTICAL CRISIS 30. MASS-MARKET LAMBS 31. THE COWBOY KILLERS 32. FROM HOME GIRL 33. LORD ASTHMA 34. HARD TO KILL 35. THE KILLBEARS 36. DYSYNERGY 37. DEATH CONSEQUENCE 38. FERAL MAN 39. WHAT THE COMMUNISTS SAY 40. THE MONKEY CAGE 41. PARALLEL PLAY 42. OUGHTISM 43. THE TITLE 44. SAVAGE AMPITHEATRE 45. RETAIL THEATER 46. AURAL HOLIDAY 47. HOLODOMOR 48. ORDINARY SINNERS 49. THE HUGGING LUSHROLLER 50. BRAND NEW BABY BOY 51. MADDENING CANT 52. DULL PROSE OF LIFE 53. BAD WRITING AIMED AT A SUBLITERATE AUDIENCE 54. WAR ON ERROR 55. THE LURE OF HERESY 56. SERIOUS AND PLAYFUL 57. TURN YOUR FACE TO STRANGE CHANGES 58. TERROR KILLERS 59. THE FOUR INCH STUD 74. ANTI-FUCK 75. CHEECH SINESTRO AND SNORKY THE BLACK POM From MODERN WISDOM V.1 #19 JULY 1971 I WISH… If I were to perform in the circus I would want to be a really smelly clown so all the other clowns would avoid me, and the people would think it's because the other clowns are just jealous, that’s all. If I could spend a whole night with anyone in history then I wish it could be Count Dracula, because then in the morning I could treat him to a stake breakfast. If I could start a new rock band I think I would call it "All Your Favorite Hits by the Original Artists." If I had an audience with the Pope I think I would say "Yo, Big Daddy! Who did you have to kill to get that groovy little hat?" From MODERN WISDOM V.1 #79 JULY 1976 I WISH… If I had to rename my home town, just to confuse tourists I think I would name it "This Exit Closed." If I could cure any one disease, I think I would choose rickets, because it has the funniest name. If I could receive one small package at this very moment, I would like it to be from God and I would like for it to be a coupon redeemable for all the money in the world. If I could have only one wish I wish it could be for an infinite number of wishes. And if the genie said no then I would smack his silly face. From MODERN WISDOM V.1 #139 JULY 1981 I WISH… If I were to wake up tomorrow to learn that all the major newspaper headlines were about me, I would want them to say that all the paper mills in the world are now my private property, and that I am the greatest. Or else. If I had to choose the title of my autobiography right now I think I would call it FOR ADULTS ONLY. If I could have be any dictator or tyrant then I would pick Genghis Khan because then I would know ancient Mongolian without having to memorize the irregular verbs. If I had to drown in any liquid other than water then just for ironic laughs I think I would go with liquid oxygen. From MODERN WISDOM V.1 #199 JULY 1986 I WISH… If I had to be stranded forever on a hostile desert island, I wish it could be Manhattan. If I could possess one supernatural ability I would wish it to be the ability to translate Russian. If I could have said one thing to Hitler when he was still alive I think it would have been, "Hey—Hitler—if you kill Churchill you can win the war!" But he wouldn't understand, because he doesn't speak English. So I would be sure to also say it in German. From MODERN WISDOM V.1 #259 JULY 1991 I WISH… If I could choose the music at my own funeral I would like it to be the complete works of the Rolling Stones performed with steel drums and firecrackers by chimpanzees.They wouldn’t forget me in a hurry! If I could leave a time capsule to be found centuries from now, I think what I would want to put into it would be Styrofoam, plutonium, smallpox, crack cocaine, and a videotape of "The Golden Girls." From MODERN WISDOM V.1 #319 JULY 1996 I WISH… If I could wipe out one type of animal forevermore I wish it could be day traders. If I were stranded on a desert island and could have only one book I would want it to be my college alumni directory so at four in the morning I could call all my classmates who think they are big shots and say, "Who's the big shot now?" I wish I could be 26 forever. Failing that, I would like to be any age forever. RESULTS OF COMPETITION NUMBER 93: The Difference between men and women. Men will eat greasy take-out even if they forgot to ask for a napkin. Women would rather starve than eat messy food with their fingers. Men will seldom kiss a dog on the lips. Women never bite the dog to show it who’s boss. Men don’t care if her shoes match her handbag. Women will react in horror to mismatched socks. Men aren’t really interested in depilatories. Women never eat their own toenails. Men will often drum their hands on the steering wheel in time to the music. Women seldom play air guitar. Men will never admit they are afraid to do something. Women seldom play practical jokes. Men will never say, “I had a good cry.” Women will never say, “Pull my finger.” Men will spend half an hour reading on the toilet. Women will spend half an hour talking in the rest room. Men seldom scream at the sight of a spider. Women seldom yell at the television. Men will seldom hesitate to describe their bowel movements. Women will seldom blow their nose into their shorts. Men will interrupt what you were saying. Women will help you finish a sentence. Men will seldom initiate an air kiss. Women will seldom exert crushing pressure in a handshake. Men love the sound of their own voice. Women are oblivious to the sound of their own voice. Men will always lie. Women will seldom tell the whole truth. --FD #100 MODERN WISDOM: AMERICA’S ONLY HUMOR MAGAZINE NUMBER 100 THIS IS WHAT I BELIEVE or, 2,920 DAYS, 17 HOURS, 25 MINUTES AND 16 SECONDS IN SING SING--BUT WHO’S COUNTING? Hello, Gentle Reader. I would ask you how you are, but I hate rhetorical questions. You got a problem with that? I’m sorry--I must sound incredibly antagonistic. Never fear. I’m a nonviolent hypocrite. You believe me--don’t you? Or do you want some...trouble? If I sound defensive, maybe it’s because I just got out of jail. I’m not ashamed to admit it. Now, when I tell them I was in jail, people ask me, “How are you feeling, now that you’re free?” Well, this is how I feel: I’ve got 97 months of hate to keep me warm--and trouble is all I know. But I should have been more careful about saying that to my probation officer. But hey--there’s one nice thing about being in jail--your parents always know where you are. As you can tell, I have some pretty strong beliefs. I tell you this because I feel that without belief of some kind, a man is little more than an empty collection of random memories and media-generated fantasies. Did I ever tell you my first girlfriend looked a lot like Wilma Flintstone? Anyway, prison is a lot like a Graduate School for High School dropouts. Doing time, a man has a lot of time on his hands to formulate his very own philosophical system. And also to wonder what kind of turn his life would have taken if the Jack Daniels had been watered just a wee bit more, and the bazooka wasn’t loaded. So this is what I believe: I think cab drivers should be FBI men, so they’ll know where you live before you even tell them. If I don’t know you, you can’t be that important. If you don’t know me, you must be supremely oblivious. If God is in the details then who put Him there? I love my fellow man--with gravy. Why do garbage men make so much noise? Because if they knew how to be quiet, they wouldn’t be garbage men. My pet peeve? People who use the word ‘peeve.’ I often make thoughtless remarks which I later regret--because most people are assholes. Um, present company excepted. What becomes a legend most? More money. A lot of people lose their virginity at just about the same time as they begin to prostitute themselves. If I see things nobody else does it’s probably because I’m hallucinating...again. I don’t drink anymore. It’s slow suicide, and I’m in a hurry. I don’t want kids to follow in my footsteps. So, for all you teens out there, here is my heartfelt message: Ignore mainstream values--follow the advice of your ignorant peers. Everybody else always ruins it for a few assholes. Sometimes even my friends say I’m boring, usually the minute I run out of money. I don’t care if the world caves in. I live in a cave. I think static cling is probably God trying to tell us something. I don’t like a man until I’ve figured him out, and then I hate him for being so transparent. Do you know who I’d like to have dinner with? Einstein. You say he’s dead? Good. More food for me! It takes a big man to take advice. It takes several big men to shut me up. Half my life is my work and the other half is trying to atone for it. You believe me--don’t you? Or do you want some trouble? Oops, there’s the phone--I’ll bet it’s my probation officer--probably calling to ask me yet another rhetorical question about some rubber checks I’ve been bouncing all over town. Goodbye, Gentle Reader. I’ll see you in another eight years or so. We are one nation dedicated to the Preposition: that. When punk rockers retire, I guess they’ll get anti-social security. I was sad because I had no toilet paper. Then I met a man who was a complete asshole. They say a dog bite is worse than human bite. I say most people don’t lick their own assholes. I went to my dentist. He’s also my psychiatrist. He told me that my cavities are all in my head. Move Over Butter. Fine. But nobody ever talks about “Fuck You, Margarine” or “Die, Lard, Die.” My dad was a liberal. So just to piss him off I brought a white girl home. If Jesus were the Michelin man, would they crucify him with tire irons? If Jesus is so popular, why does he have to ask us for money every Sunday? Jesus turned the water into wine. Nowadays, that’s called enabling behavior. What if the crucifixion were just a dice game that went terribly, terribly wrong? Nothing’s more fun than a barrel of monkeys. Except maybe one monkey...in a barrel...giving you that special little smile. On the way over here I was thinking, everything's coming my way. That’s because I was driving on the wrong side of the Massachusetts Turnpike. I’ve got Malcolm X-ray Specs--they enable me to see through white hypocricy. Politics is sports for people who are too fat to run and too stupid to retire. I can start drinking anytime I want to. That’s why I’m on a 12 step program to get off of Jesus and back onto hard drugs. Drug addiction is grounds for divorce. But marriage...is grounds for drug addiction. Good home cooking just melts in your mouth. Then again, so does the mercury from a thermometer. I don’t like to use the word ‘shit.’ I prefer to call it something nice, like ‘Brown monuments to a healthy appetite.’ Never talk down to children. Only adults are mature enough to be condescended to. I don’t believe that fishing is cruel. I believe that the fish don’t feel the pain. I believe that they flop around on the bottom of the boat just for fun If you can’t be with the one you love, brother, love the one you’re with. Good advice. Especially if you happen to be in prison. A schizophrenic always demands your divided attention. Why buy a cow if milk is cheap? For that matter, why buy anything if you’re sturdy enough to beg? Everybody repeat after me....."Destroy all conformists.” I believe every newborn child arrives on this earth with a message for mankind: “I’m cold and naked and hungry and covered with slime and excrement. Quit gawking and shove an enormous tit in my toothless mouth---pronto! When I have a baby, I think, when they hand me my newborn infant, wrapped in swaddling clothes, I’ll say, “Oh--don’t bother wrapping it, Nurse--I’ll eat it here.” I don’t like to wear a tie. But at a funeral, I pull my shirt up over my head. To show respect for the deceased, and just in case the dead guy had some sort of awful disease. Recently, I invented a religion for dogs. It’s called “Heel.” The Old Testament is one word: “Sit.” And the New Testament is two words: “Good Dog.” One good thing about skinheads--they never leave hair in the drain. Q: What do you call a fat Democrat? A: A Republican. Q: What do you call a skinny Republican? A: A survivalist. They’re remaking “A Streetcar named Desire” for the pay-per-view market--of course, they’re jazzing it up a bit-- now they’re calling it “Fucking Trolley Sluts.” Basically, Science Fiction is sports for people who throw like girls. All those who prefer not to answer rhetorical questions, would you raise your hands? You can’t have everything. The storage fees alone would wipe you out. Every little breeze seems to whisper ‘Louise.’ I beg you...please...make it stop. MAKE IT STOP!! People are still investigating who killed JFK. Well, I really shouldn’t be telling you this, but, actually, it was me...but I was only 6 years old at the time, and Oswald had to help me aim...actually, he put me up on some telephone books so I could reach the window.... Join the army! Be a hostage and see the world--or at least, a very small part of it! I still think Ollie North should have kept the weapons and sold the Challenger to Iran. One nice thing about religion: At least it doesn’t teach you to lie, cheat and steal. Unless you’re a Scientologist. I wish that the government would outlaw ME--so I could be sold in front of housing projects for twenty dollars a gram! Every now and then I like to give my dog a treat. So last night I threw a boullion cube in the toilet bowl. I am not passive-aggressive, my evil...friend. I went to my high school reuinion recently. And just for fun, I decided to go to where I had carved my initials, years ago. But the headmaster was wearing a toupee. I may not have money...But I have something more important. I have the human spirit. Can I borrow a cup of heroin? Never mind the cup, I’ll eat it here. Basically, I’m a mean son of a bitch. I like to go to Weight Watchers meetings and leave chocolate-flavored farts in the vestibule. I wanted to be a boxer, but I never made the grade. So instead, I just walk around in swimming trunks and punch people. I learned a lot from my dog. Sadly, he's dead now. His noble heart grew too big for his body and it burst. Yes, I leaned a lot from that dog. How to roll around in my own filth. How to kill chickens. How to hump people’s legs. How to piss on trees. And, best of all--how to beg for treats with my genetalia exposed. I marketed a Bible for children called “The Bib”. The Old Testament is just one word: “No.” And the New Testament is also one word: “Because.” If Jesus died for our sins, does he get mad if we don’t commit any? Why don’t satanic warlocks ever appear on televison to exhort unbelievers to donate money to fight God? If we have a moment of silence in public schools, shouldn’t we also have a moment of noise in Bible schools? Is it true that God must especially love Fundamentalist preachers, Paleoconservative Republicans and the mentally ill, since He is all they ever talk about? What if Noah had gotten drunk while he was on the ark and said, “HEY--fuck it! Throw the animals overboard--bring the fish up here!” I do not have any messianic delusions. At least, that’s what God told me. But I do remember my most embarrassing moment. I was being crucified, and the Roman Centurion offered me a sponge soaked in wine, and I had to admit I was a recovering alcoholic. Since Jesus’ blood was wine, does that mean He was always drunk? If the 12 Apostles were to be marketed as action figures, would Judas be sold separately? The Bible says that Jesus died for our sins. Couldn’t you say the same thing about King Kong, Cool Hand Luke, and Frankenstein? If you fried and ate the flaming heart of Jesus, would it taste like chicken? Or would it taste like alligator? God is not dead--He just doesn’t like crowds. Maybe that’s why you never see Him in a church. Who can ever forget the Beatles song “Tomorrow Never Knows,” which John Lennon sang in the voice of Tennessee Tuxedo? I like to pretend to be a soldier, so I can smoke in hospitals. I like to spend hours in the bathtub. Sometimes I even put water in there. The Whiskey Rebellion of 1791. What was their political platform? “AARGH?”? What was their campaign slogan? “BLEEAGH”? Kids--stay in school. Because we sure don’t want you around here. February was National Trauma Awareness Month, but I was too frightened to mention it until now. I don't go to T.G.I.F.'s...because I don't BELIEVE in God. I thought, what if you replaced the war on poverty with the war on poetry, but then I realized, they're both the same thing. My attitude is superior to yours. Don't you agree? Or do you have a shitty attitude? There are plenty of things that are more important than money. But they cost too much. When I look out my window, all I see are mere ants. Oops. By George, those ARE ants! I'd better stop spilling crumbs on the windowsill! In the future we'll all know so much about our mental health it'll drive us crazy. Time was, I used to sleep with a different woman every night. Actually, she was one woman with a multiple personality disorder. When you're inside the Statue of Liberty does that mean you can do anything you want? Q: You wouldn't hit a man with glasses, would you? A: No, I'd hit him with a two-by-four. If I had to be stranded forever on a hostile desert island, I wish it could be Manhattan. My dad's a meat and potatoes man. I hope to God it's not hereditary. Would you refuse to answer a hypothetical question if yes means no and no means yes? Repeat after me: I will not conform. 15 things you really shouldn't say after the judge tells you to swear on the Bible. 1) No, Judge Nazi! 2) You can't handle the truth! 3) Where I come from a fat pig like you could never be a judge. 4) Viva la revolution! 5) I just do what the gun tells me to do. 6) I see you bear the mark of the beast. Truly, these are the end times. 7) Do you ever get a boner under that robe, or are you too old to have sex? 8) I am not subject to your petty laws. 9) What are you, on the pipe? 10) Bite my crank, baldy. 11) You don't know it yet, but you're dead. 12) You are one weird Mama Jamma. 13) Are you talkin' to me? 14) It smells like pork in here. 15) Meow? If there's one thing we've learned from our foreign policy, it's this: The more illusory the enemy, the more ruthlessly he must be hunted down. Every time it rains with the thunder and lightning, the dog tries to hide in the fireplace. There's only one problem. We don't have a fireplace. At least, we didn't used to. Until we got the dog. There's a thin line between genius and insanity. But there's an even thinner line between stupidity and sabotage. My mother had me on Labor Day. It took her 24 hours. Does the word "manic-depressive" take a hyphen? SOMETIMES I THINK IT DOES! And…other…times…I just don't…care…. The sign at the supermarket checkout said 12 items or less and I had fifteen items. So I ate the canister of pepper, and the piece of sandpaper, and the box of matches. And then I turned to the cashier and said, "Is it hot in here, or is it just me?" I told my girlfriend to look under the Christmas tree for her present and when she opened it, guess what it was? It was another Christmas tree, only smaller. The joke was on me, though, because it wasn't even Christmas. I went to Disneyland. They had an animatronic robot of Abraham Lincoln in the Hall of Presients, so I stole it and used took it out to my truck, only they caught me. They asked me why I took it and I said, "I was using its head to check for tread wear on my tires, because I didn't have a penny." I took too many placebos and now I think I'm sick, but I'm not, really. Our school library couldn't afford an aquarium…so they stuck a couple of cans of tuna under a florescent lamp. My father said that if I work in a restaurant I'll always have something to eat. So I asked him what if I took a job in a coffee shop—would I always be nervous? My nephew wanted one of those glass balls with a snow scene inside. So I flicked some dandruff on a cue ball and said, 'Here you go Sonny--here's a fuckin' blizzard for ya." I went to my dentist, who is also my psychiatrist. He told me my cavities were all in my head. I know, I know.... I'm my own worst enemy. Really. I know it. I kidnapped myself and held myself for ransom, then I called my answering machine and said, Follow my instructions to the letter or I'lll kill myself." And then I hung up. When I was a kid, my dad would tell me that the policeman was my friend. And I used to say, “Yeah, right--all of my friends are weird and scary and carry .38 magnums in their socks.” Here’s my motto: End racism--let the class warfare begin. Some people say I have my grandfather’s smile. That’s because I borrowed his dentures. I don't get mad...I get angry. It’s no good to be original if nobody wants to copy you. Life is never fair...but death always is. It’s fun to go shopping. But it’s even more fun to go shopping with a hand grenade. I am inflexibly pugnacious--but I can change that--and I’ll fight the first man who says different. I promise that when I sit down to negotiate with the Chinese and the Russians, the first words out of my mouth will be, “I’m afraid of you burly men.” You know, I don’t really want to be President--I just want to be profiled in THE NEW YORKER. But if I had to, I guess I’d settle for the lousy presidency. Cynicism accomplishes nothing. But it sure is fun to watch. * Like most Americans, I think the government has too much power. And, like most Americans, I think the government should do something about it. There's one advantage to being obscure nobody bothers to attack you. I have two devils on my shoulders. One's a good devil. The other one's...just a fuckin' devil, I guess. * I went looking for a cross between fame and fortune. And I’ve found it. It’s called Famine. ** And just when I thought I’ve seen everything, I’m starting to develop cataracts. I cry every day. But it’s only to wash my face. I have sold my soul to NO special interests. Because I have no soul. I think I might be able to give up my compulsion to gamble--but the smart money is against it. I want you to remember--no matter how strangely I act in the days to come--I JUST DO WHAT THE GUN TELLS ME TO DO! I think we should abolish the World Bank and the IMF-- so that poor people can starve in peace, without arrogant interference by American imperialists. I came in second in a stupidity contest. Why? Because I was stupid! I had a hidden agenda--but now I can’t find it. My dreams for America are as big as America itself. And they will probably disappear down an America-sized rathole. The Democrats like to look for things the government ought to do. The Republicans like to look for things the government ought not to do. And on Saturday mornings, I like to watch Scoobie Doobie Doo, Where Are You? If elected President, I promise to outlaw aggressive panhandling near ATMs. If not elected, I’ll probably go back to my old job--aggressive panhandling near ATMs. Hell’s not such a bad place--especially in the summer, when there’s no tourists. When I was a child, I used to think the moon was following me around. Then I realized it was following my father around. Because he owed it money. My goal in life is to sting like a bee, and then die, and then be brought back to life as FRANKENBEE. I’m in love with the spotlight--because I’m afraid of my own shadow. * I have to make up my mind whether or not to be indecisive. On the way over here, I went from 0 to 60 in ten seconds. And now I’m 99 years old. People have alleged that I am vindictive. I can assure them that I will not abide this blood libel. Sure, my enemies have made allegations--that I’m arrogant, even downright crazed. But the truth of these allegations is irrelevant. Why? Because I say so! But, as Archilochus has said, “The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing.”But what about the alligator, who has a PhD in Physical Education, and yet still can’t find a job in the public school system? GOURMET COFFEE--for people who wish they still used drugs! Winner: “Gosh is a concept”--Brian S., Somerville, MA. Runners up: “There is Hunger among thieves.”--John D., Wash., D.C. “In onion there is strength.”--Andrew M., Cambridge, MA. “Nothing exceeds like excess.”-Philippe B., Managua, Nicaragua. “Old Hobbits die hard.”--Ralph B., Los Angeles, CA. “Hysteria repeats itself.”--Cornelia R., NYC. “Axioms speak louder than words.”--Richard N., NYC. “All things are possible with Gold.”--Erik R., NYC. “Art is short and life is stupid.”--Erna D., Albany NY. “If you can’t beat them, cry.”--Bobby D., Pittsburgh PA. “Brevity is....”--Billy R., Cambridge, MA. “You cannot teach an old God new tricks.”--FD, Providence, RI. “Don’t put all your egos in one basket-case.”--Jackie O., Salt Lake City UT. “A friend in need...is typical.”--Mary K, Erie, PA. “You cannot serve God and mammals.”--John W., Jersey City, NJ. “Only the Gods die young.”--Billy J., Atlantic City, NJ. “Hope springs eternal in the chicken breast.”--Chris C., Wash., D.C. Just last week I filled out my unemployment application in three different colors of ink. And this week I’m drawing disability. I had a job writing children’s books. But I got grounded for using the word ‘poop.’ But the final straw was when they rejected my masterpiece, WINNIE THE SHIT. I did P.R. for Disney World. They wanted me to come up with a hip new slogan. But they fired me for the one I came up with: “Bite My Crank, You Stinkin’ Rat.” The good news is that the Six Flags organization has offered me a high-paying consultant’s position. I’ve got to lose some weight. Just recently I got on one of those old-fashioned scales that also tells your fortune on a little card. Mine said, “You weigh 260 pounds. Please don’t eat me.” I went to a Gypsy fortune teller. She looked in her crystal ball and said, “You have no intention of paying me. Go away before I call the politsia.” I went to a Chinese restaurant for lunch. I opened a fortune cookie and the message read “You will have a lifetime of good fortune if you eat a different fortune cookie.” I like to live sensibly. I exercise. I buckle up. I drink green tea, I eat cauliflower. So every now and then I figure it’s OK if I treat myself to a piping hot bowl of cocaine--in its cheap, smokable form. Lately, instead of doing my real work, I’ve been writing a book I plan to call The History of Cynicism and Procrastination. If I ever finish it. I don’t know why I should even bother. My philosophy of comedy is simple. I believe it’s better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. OK...actually, Melville said that.... I’m also convinced that I’m so original that 50 years from now, people will idolize me....OK. I admit it. It was Wilhelm Reich who actually said that. I meditate. You know what my secret mantra is? “Secret Mantra.” Boy, am I confused.... But I have my playful side. I like to honk my horn outside the police barracks so they can admire my home-made licence plate--which reads “Militia.” When they come outside to get a closer look, I make sure they can see my bumper sticker, which reads “Please arrest me before I take out the stolen semi-automatics from the trunk of my stolen car and begin firing wildly in all directions.” Actually, I’m a liberal. I believe that we should to be kind to animals. And THEN eat them. I only buy rat poison which has never been tested on animals. I can’t control my kids. The hell of it is, I don’t have any kids. I’m hip. I took my goldfish to a body piercing parlor. Now he swims around with a groovy little hook in his mouth. Like most Americans, I still believe that the only way to stop tyrants is to take over the earth. Someday Republican politicians will finally figure out how to kiss unborn babies. Someday Democratic legislators will get even for moments of silent prayer in public schools. By asking for a moment of noise in Bible schools. I believe that someday the meek shall inherit the earth. Which is fine by me. As long as I inherit the drilling rights. I’d like to vote with my feet. But I don’t want anyone to see how cheap my shoes are. You know what I think is nice? Blow dryers in rest rooms which considerately give germs a nice warm environment to grow in. Mouthwashes that kill only the weak germs, so you can walk around instead with a mouthful of strong germs. And TV shows about brainwashing that I just can’t seem to tear myself away from. Why do men worship God? I suppose for the same reason dogs whimper at vacuum cleaners. Nothing’s more fun than a barrel of monkeys. Except...maybe one monkey, in a barrel, giving you ...that special little smile. It occurs to me that in reality, most people are misshapen freaks. Although I don’t really think that. I just like to use the word “misshapen.” My dog is my best friend, which is why I don’t go out on dates any more. Ever notice how a guy having an orgasm starts to talk just like Frankenstein? Just because you turn your life around 180 degrees, doesn’t mean you know all the angles. Pick one pocket, it’s a crime. Pick a thousand pockets, that’s called ‘market research’. Yesterday as I was driving around I heard voices out of thin air telling me about ghastly murders. Finally, I couldn’t stand any more so I popped the audio book out of the cassette player. Don’t say I’m unemployable. Just say that I’m undergoing a permanent paradigm shift. Running away from your problems never solved anything, but at least you get a cardio-pulmonary workout. The ability to rate things is overrated. When going to confession it’s probably not a good idea to start out by saying “Father forgive me, for I am stoned.” They tell you that fire is an invaluable friend, and a terrible foe, but what they don’t tell you is that sooner or later everybody gets burned. I have often pondered this riddle of the ages: Why do clowns have big feet? And after half a lifetime of deep contemplation I decided the reason was so they can stay up after I punch ‘em. 76 I am the wrong hero. Alcoholic...drug addict....easy guy to shop for on Christmas. 77 Some call me a cracker-barrel philosopher of the bourgeosie. Others refer to me as the avatar of the moron zeitgeist. 78 You know...Christmas is a special time of year...a time to give thanks...no, actually, that's Thanksgiving. What an idiot I am! 79 They say that Christmas comes but one a year. As opposed to most other holidays, which happen three or four times a week. 80 I'm from a quiet little town called Pittsburgh. The last big thing that happened there was the Whiskey Rebellion. Folks, if I ever get involved in a rebellion, I'd want it to be a whiskey rebellion. What's their political platform? HOUGHHHHHHHUH! What's their slogan? AARGGH! 81 This festive holiday season, I'd like for us all to pause for just a moment to think about the forgotten people....the convicts on death row....I think capital punishment is an ugly expression...I think we should change it to something nice. Like "Putting the killers to sleep." Or "Lights out for felons." Or “Harvesting the psychopaths.” Or "Three strikes and you're dead." Or "Giving Amnesty International something to complain about." Or "A date with Old Sparky." "Or "A dose of Edison's Medicine." [&c.] 82 Frosty the snowman...two eyes made out of coal? How ecologically unsound. Shouldn’t it be two eyes made out of natural gas? 83 I grew up on an Indian reservation. We used to play Indians. When we got bored with that, we’d play “Indians...and more fuckin’ Indians.” 84 If I had a hammer...there’d be no more folk singers. Folk music is every bit as oppressive as the injustices it is supposedly attempting to eradicate. 85 Remember, you can’t spell Disneyland without...DNA. Here’s the dirty secret behind the Magic Kingdom: all those cartoon characters are genetic mutants. Do you doubt me? What’s with the sterile gloves... should we call the Center for Disease Control? MICKEY MOUSE. That’s the real conspiracy. Stands for MIC (Military Industrial Complex)...KEY (Keynesian Economic Yoke)...MOUSE (More Of United States Engulfment). 86 If you take too many anti-nausea pills, do you get nauseous? Or do you never get nauseous again? 87 I must say that I am upset with our President. Here’s the speech I wish he would have given: “I did have sex with that woman. My wife is as frigid as an Eskimo pie. I would rather screw Buddy, my chocolate Labrador--at least HE moves his tail. I don’t care if I embarrassed my family--they embarrass me. My brother Roger is a one-eyed hillbilly--shucks, he’s snorted so much goofy dust they had to take his nose off and sew a button on! My wife has a heart like an icicle. My daughter looks like a rhesus monkey. Now, Ken Starr may be an honest man, but I say that making whoopie with that intern was appropriate--best of all, it was right! And no fool is going to tell me it’s a sin to feel that good! God bless you--and God bless America. “ 88 Bill Clinton had the prize-winning hog at the Arkansas state fair. But they made him put it back in his pants. 89 December was truama awareness month. But I was too frightened to mention it until now. 90 Does anal compulsive take a hyphen? WELL? DOES IT?? 91 Many comics secretly despise their audiences. I'm different. I openly despise you amid my attempts to make nice. Let me see your lighters, Boston so that I can see every rotting tooth in your misshapen skulls. 92 I was born under a lucky star. And it felt so good when they pried it off me. 93 I took an informal survey of the man in the street. But he had been completely flattened by Sports Utility Vehicles. 94 I had the weight of the world on my shoulders. And now my head is completely crushed. 95 The signs. Just once, I’d like to see some variety. Like, “Come In--Unauthorized Personnel Only.” Or, “Vehicle will be towed at owner’s expense--but hey, we’ll throw in two free tickets to the Ice Capades.” Or, “No Parking At Any Time--unless you think you can get away with it.” Or, “Speed Limit strictly enforced--unless you look like an important big shot on his way to a board meeting.” And in ads-- when they say “We’ve passed the savings on to you”? What about all the other times? Do they keep the money for themselves and blow it on Jagermaister, bimbos, and scratch tickets? 96 I like to go to the Alzheimer’s Lounge--a place where everybody knows your name...except you. 97 First, save the whales. Then ask the whales to save you. 98 I took too many placebos and now I think I’m sick, but I’m not, really. 99 What about Jesus’ gym coach? What did he say at the crucifixion? “C’mon you sissy, that wound ain’t so bad! Gimme 20 laps!”. 100 When punk rockers retire, I guess they’ll get anti-social security. 101 If I were Irish, people would call me a “storyteller.” 102 I overdosed on antidotes, and I’ve never felt better. 103 They say a dog bite is worse than human bite. I say most people don’t lick their own assholes. 104 When you take your pet to the park to piss on trees, isn’t that just the doggie internet ? 105 My Dog turned 21. That’s 3 in human years. 106 My dad was a hippie. He’d always say “Son...I’m going to teach you a lesson I’ll never remember.” 107 Move over butter. Fine. But nobody ever talks about “Fuck You, margarine” or “Die, Lard, Die.” 108 A carrot improves your vision at night. So does a hand grenade. 109 Some bumper stickers: Honk if you’re a Canadian Goose. No baby on board--my life is meaningless. Honk if you’ve betrayed our Lord. Caution: Messiah on Board. Ask me about my eternal torment. 110 What not to say to a traffic cop: Here’s a nickel, ossifer, go buy yourself some deodorant, cause you stink. Here’s a dollar, go buy your wife some crack. I just do what the gun tells me to do. You should have seen how fast I was going BEFORE I ran over the little girl. 111 He who laughs last is sitting there laughing like an idiot, little realizing that I could crush him like a puny ant. 112 Growing up, we got Ms. Hard as rocks. Didn’t melt in your mouth. Wouldn’t even melt on the surface of mercury. THEY WERE FUCKING MS! 113 It is well to remember that the entire universe...ought to bow down to the might of the hero...and that it does not...is a minor annoyance which shall soon be rectified. 114 “The croaking raven bellows forth revenge.” Not much of a pick-up line, but the best I can do. But recently, I’ve thought of a better one: “Hey--me and my really dangerous criminal friends are going to go to the hazardous materials storage dump and stay up all night eating groovy death candy till we end up in the hospital, only you’re not invited because you’re not hip with the in crowd--OK?” 115 My girlfriend is an existentialist....I gave her a disengagement ring. 116 My motto: Can’t drive 55. Guy in back of me: Can’t drive 85. Guy in front of me: Can’t drive, period. That’s the definition of a shit sandwich. 117 I believe all life is sacred. I would never harm an animal larger than myself. I believe all life is sacred. I wouldn’t even kill a fly. I believe all life is--whack!--got him! 118 My dad was a liberal. So just to piss him off I brought a white girl home. 119 You lose at Jeopardy, and what do they give you as a consolation prize? The home version of Jeopardy. You’ve made an ass of yourself in front of millions of people, and what’s the first thing you see when you get home? A home version of the fiendish game that caused your downfall! 120 My psychiatrist says I’m cured. Now I’ve got pre-traumatic relaxation syndrome; I have a monopolar order. 121 I shop at the Oxymoronic Shopping Mall. The Worthless Shop sells priceless antiques; The Value Store sells toxic junk. 122 If Jesus were the Michelin man, would they crucify him with tire irons? 123 If Jesus is so popular, why does he have to ask us for money every Sunday? 124 Jesus turned the water into wine. Nowadays, that’s called enabling behavior. 125 What if the crucifixion were just a dice game that went terribly, terribly wrong? 126 You know you’re growing old when...you have to rely on formulaic gimmicks like this. 127 My old apartment used to smell like cat piss. The hell of it is, I didn’t own a cat. It used to smell like the sweatband of a recently indicted televangelist’s fedora....like the Sauna room of the Boston Patriots the night they lost the superbowl...like Alvin Chipmunk’s laundry bag...like Frankenstein’s dentures...like Mastodon plaque...like Godzilla had given the place a tongue bath. And the bums! They’d stand outside on a Sunday morning saying stuff like, “It’s a good rubbing alcohol--it’s not a great rubbing alcohol.” 128 I like your attitude. Especially if you don’t like mine. 129 I’m like an ox--got flies in my ears, worms in my belly, and I’m standing in a puddle of my own waste products. 130 What’ll happen when Bono learns another chord--will they call themselves U3? 131 You must be the famous crowd I’ve heard so much about. You’re not as big as you look on tv. 132 Half our life is work and the other half is spent trying to atone for it. 133 I was taken to court. The evidence was antimatter, and the charge was refusing to tamper with it. 134 This I believe: television is chewing tobacco for the eyes. Too bad you can’t spit it into a styrofoam cup when you’ve finished with it. 135 Nothing’s more fun than a barrel of monkeys. Except maybe one monkey...in a barrel...giving you that special little smile. 136 My father has dyslexia; doesn’t mean I evah ti. 137 The only culture Boston has today is in its frozen yogurt, and that’s probably been dead for 100 years too. What is Boston but a hamlet blown up to poster size? The Boston Globe is just like any small town newspaper--typical headline, “Area Youth Wins Spelling Bee”. The only newsworthy things that happen here are all from out of town. “Tremblors Rock Hub. Actual Earthquake to Open in NY Next Week.” 138 The only substitute for good manners is you sign all your assets over to me. 139 On the way over here I was thinking, everything's coming my way, that’s because I was driving on the wrong side of the Mass Pike. 140 People sneer at the surrealists. But actually, driving is dada. 141 Hey, what about those cars? I think we should call them what they really are: “The automobile: fire, plus the wheel. Prometheus plus gasolene. And, like fire, a good friend, but a treacherous foe. Cars: America’s first robot slaves, which paved the way for radio, air conditioning, television, computers, photocopiers, fax machines and cell phones. All those people who feel sorry for you for not having this bevy of slaves don’t realize there are people alive today who went for years without them.Now we are the slaves to these machines. We have been emasculated by post industrial technology--or at least, so my computer tells me. In fact, the computer told me to write this. And I hear and I obey. 142 If at first you don't succeed, you must be destroyed. Also, Try try not not to repeat repeat yourself yourself again again. 143 For every action, shut up. 144 He who hesitates must die. 145 The more illusory the enemy, the more ruthlessly he must be hunted down. 146 Cigarette warning: Burning Surgeon generals contain carbon monoxide. 147 Don’t start listening until I say something offensive. 148 I succeed to impress people I don’t like, and the time and effort causes me to ignore the people I love. 149 I swear by almighty God to tell the truth, the whole truth, and by the way, could you cash a personal check for me? 150 I’ve got Malcolm X ray vision--it enables me to see through white hypocricy. 151 The hardness of the butter is directly proportional to the softness of your ass. 152 To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research, and to steal punctuation and logic from a manuscript is called “editing”. 153 Politics is sports for people who are too fat to run and too stupid to retire. 154 This post has been edited by dimenno*: Feb 22 2011, 10:44 PM

dimenno	Feb 22 2011, 10:44 PM Post #2315
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	154 What is the sound of a bell, backwards. Gnnnnnnnnnnnnnnob? 155 You never really learn to drive until you learn to swear. 156 I don’t want to hear the word Monday. I want to hear the word Money. 157 Do not choose between two evils; give me your money instead. 158 Don’t ask me to give you change for a dollar. True and lasting change will require dismantling the whole corrupt power structure and starting all over again. 159 A fool and his money must report to my office immediately. 160 My Daddy was a semi-literate ventriloquist. He moved other people’s lips when he read. 161 I told my girl I wanted her for my wife... who, incidentally, is a vampire. 162 I can start drinking anytime I want to. That’s why I’m on a 12 step program to get off of Jesus and back onto hard drugs. 163 Everybody repeat after me....."Destroy all conformists.” 163 Those are the ones I’d like to kill--the hostile ones. 164 I don’t subscribe to Scientific American I subscribe to Superstitious Caveman. Lead story: “Fire--Bad!” 165 If aliens are silicon based, wouldn’t they want us to take them to our nudie bars? 166 Where do I see myself in five years? Hopefully, in a position to destroy anyone who asks me that question. 167 This week, as every week, the award for best performance by The Wrong Hero goes to...The Wrong Hero. 168 Drug addiction is grounds for divorce. But marriage is grounds for drug addiction. 169 Everybody else always ruins it for a few assholes. 170 95% of all men masturbate in the shower. The other 5% are chimpanzees. 171 99% of all statistics are wrong--including this one. 172 If at first you don't succeed, then you might try working on your pretentious diction. Who the hell do you think YOU are--Alfred the Butler from the Batman tv show? 173 My parrot says: “Polly want a cracker.” I say, “Polly also want a lesson in remedial grammar.” 174 The Wrong Hero has been brought to you by “I’m Hungry Mix”--starving people ask for it by name. 175 I can see a thing without my glasses. 3. They said it couldn’t be done, and they were right. WHO ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU READING THIS? Turn your eyes away this instant.Unless you want to prove them wrong. You know who I mean...THEM...those scoundrels at the University...those pointy-headed bureaucrats and doubledomes who... laughed...at my theories....who called me mad...MAD! ...HAHH!!! They said I have an obsessive-compusive disorder...and I deny it! I deny it!! I deny it!!! (There--now I ‘ll cross myself 20 times and say 500 Hail Marys and count the number of references to flying saucers in the Bible and see Star Wars for the 8,778th time.) They said I was a megalomaniac with schizoid tendencies--think of it--they dared--dared to slander ME! I-I’LL KILL THEM ALL!! They even claimed--behind my back--that I suffered from acute paranoia--well, I got news for them--there’s NOTHING cute about MY paranoia! 76. Verily, I say unto thee: A man may make a very dull song sound quite exciting by yelling “HEY!” at strategically appropriate intervals. 77. An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Sorry, Boss, but I need to know what keeps the policeman away. 78. Your parents and grandparents and dyspeptic elderly relatives listen to loudmouthed right-wing drive-time radio talk show hosts as revenge for having to endure your ear-splitting rock and roll. And because these idea-impaired demogogues rant at a pace of about 14 words a minute from a tinny car radio, that leaves plenty of time for your kinfolk to pull a pint bottle of vodka or schnapps or rye whiskey out of the glove compartment of their 300 horsepower land yacht and fix themselves a drinky-poo without spilling so much as a drop or missing even one word or mowing down a single pedestrian--because they’re driving down the turnpike at about 38 miles an hour wearing greasy fedoras (with a fishing fly in the sweatband) that are bigger than their heads muttering ethnic slurs in some incomprehensible and only vaguely Indo-European dialect and yearning for the days when clean-cut sailor boys cut a rug with husky gum-snapping ribbon-haired pin-up gals to the strains of whitebread big bands with the frontman’s initials on the drumset. 79. I don’t like to wear a tie. But at a funeral, I pull my shirt up over my head. To show respect for the deceased, and just in case the dead guy had some sort of awful disease. 80. No bread is dirty to a hungry man. 81. Editorial cartoons are the hieroglyphics of treason. 82. There is no medicine to cure hatred, but there are certain prescription drugs that just might make me willing to spend a little more time with you. Got any? 83. If the triangles had a God, I’ll bet he’d be a real square. 84. The wise must be respected, even when they advise you to sell all your Upper West Side property and invest it in Chernobyl, Russian Rubles, Brazilian Reals, East German Marks, and Amalgamated Buggywhip. 85. Unlike most people, I prefer to work over the weekend. I don’t need a set time to act spontaneous. 86. I wept when I was born and now I cry every day. It’s the only time I wash my face. 87. I don’t want to make the big decisions--or do I? 88. All those who prefer not to answer rhetorical questions, would you raise your hands? 89. Flattery is beer. Truth is medicine. 90. It’s a dog eat dog world. But there’s also a lot of cattiness. 91. He who does not know his way to the sea will never be seasick. Unless he has an unusually vivid imagination. 92. Put the sea up to your ear and you’ll often pick up Shell Oil. 93. I find it is a good thing to know your life’s work--at least for the time being. 94. You can’t have everything. The storage fees alone would wipe you out. 95. Fight fire with fire and they’ll haul you off on an arson charge quicker than you can deface a facsimile of Smokey the Bear. 96. A good strategy is to divide, and then divide again. You want to know what I suggest? Put aside the conquer part until there’s a pretty girl close at hand to admire your exploits. Then maybe you can take her up to your room and show her your etchings and she can pretend to be as impressed as hell, and then--well, then maybe you could just let nature take its course. 97. When you shake a Magic Eight Ball and the response is “Ask Again,” then for the love of Jesus, Mary and Joseph, go away and give the Magic Eight Ball some more time to think! 98. I believe every newborn child arrives on this earth with a message for mankind: “I’m cold and naked and hungry and covered with slime and excrement. Quit gawking and shove an enormous tit in my toothless mouth---pronto! Habla Espanol?” 99. I have to admit I’m in a quandry. Which is a laundromat run by a duck. 100. For the first time in American history there’s over two million people in jail--and yet, some soreheads still insist there’s no such thing as progress. 101. Here’s a bit of folk wisdom to share with the kiddies: Every time it rains when the sun is shining, a policeman is beating his wife. 102. One good thing about skinheads--they never leave hair in the drain. 103. Chewing tobacco between baby’s toes soothes teething pain. 104. Only cynical people generalize. And the man who said that is probably the world’s biggest jerk. 105. When I have a baby, I think, when they hand me my newborn infant, wrapped in swaddling clothes, I’ll say, “Oh--don’t bother wrapping it, Nurse--I’ll eat it here.” 106. Q: What do you call a fat Democrat? A: A Republican. 107. Q: What do you call a skinny Republican? A: A survivalist. 108. They’re remaking “A Streetcar named Desire” for the pay-per-view market--of course, they’re jazzing it up a bit-- now they’re calling it “Fucking Trolley Sluts.” 109. 56% of Americans believe there’s baseball in heaven. This puts a whole new spin on the expression “Coming home to Jesus.” 110. I think they should put all those welfare chiselers to work--as stonemasons. 111. They just got a computer where I work, and I’m glad, because now I can fuck things up at the speed of light. 112. The Pope says drug addiction is grounds for divorce. Like he’s the expert. I’ve always said that marriage is grounds for drug addiction. 113. My parents went to Alpha Centauri and all I got was this lousy t-shirt and this cheap plastic death ray that doesn’t even kill Earthlings. 114. Regression with Dummy Variables--what’s that, the new slogan of the United States Congress? 115. You know what I think is nice? Blow dryers in public restrooms which considerately give germs and viruses a nice warm environment to multiply in. 116. My goldfish are pissed off at me because I don’t move around enough. 117. Basically, Science Fiction is sports for people who throw like girls. 118. Every little breeze seems to whisper ‘Louise.’ I beg you...please...make it stop. MAKE IT STOP!! 119. I’m judge, jury and executioner. Needless to say, holding down three jobs, I don’t get much sleep. 120. To believe everything is too much and to believe nothing is not enough and so now I believe I’ll take a nap because now my head is throbbing. 121. Don’t believe everything you hear or tell all you know. Save it for the sequel. 122. Not only do I have nothing to say, I can’t even find the right words. 123. In the future, robot slaves and computers will do all the work and the rest of us will be put in protective custody just to keep us out of the way. (Wait--did I say in the FUTURE?) 109. The nice thing about being surrounded by enemies is that you’re never lonely.

FrankD	Feb 23 2011, 09:26 AM Post #2316
Noise Board Sponsor Group: Moderators Posts: 44,482 Joined: July 3 03 From: MP3 Forum Moderator Member No.: 302

dimenno	Mar 10 2011, 11:32 PM Post #2317
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	http://classiclit.about.com/library/bl-ete...rown-childe.htm

dimenno	Mar 24 2011, 07:46 PM Post #2318
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	http://englishhistory.net/byron/poems/harold.html

dimenno	Sep 14 2011, 04:14 PM Post #2319
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	Little Lotta: http://pappysgoldenage.blogspot.com/search...;max-results=20

dimenno	Apr 10 2012, 07:57 PM Post #2320
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	QUOTE(dimenno @ Mar 20 2009, 10:05 PM) PDQ-4+ ESSA Environmental Stimulation Sensitivity Assessment http://www.pdq4.com/stimtest.html Your score of 160 indicates that you are a stimulus augmentor.Other stimulus augmentors who have indicated they were happy with their jobs are working as: Small business owner, director, office manager, administrative assistant, project manager, salesperson, freelance writer, technology manager, nurse, and motion picture production executive. You Scored : 130 http://www.pdq4.com/showresults1v4.html

FrankD	Apr 10 2012, 08:59 PM Post #2321
Noise Board Sponsor Group: Moderators Posts: 44,482 Joined: July 3 03 From: MP3 Forum Moderator Member No.: 302	QUOTE(dimenno @ Apr 10 2012, 08:57 PM) You are a stinker you lost thirty points

dimenno	Apr 11 2012, 10:42 PM Post #2322
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	QUOTE(FrankD @ Apr 10 2012, 09:59 PM) you lost thirty points http://www.thrillingdetective.com/trivia/triv191.html http://gointothestory.blcklst.com/2012/03/...dialogue-3.html This post has been edited by dimenno: Apr 11 2012, 10:47 PM

dimenno	Apr 11 2012, 11:52 PM Post #2323
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/archive/index.php/t-124549.html

dimenno	Apr 12 2012, 12:58 AM Post #2324
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	http://risusiverse.wetpaint.com/page/Pulp+Clich%C3%A9s

dimenno	May 30 2012, 08:33 PM Post #2325
Group: Members - Basic Posts: 39,397 Joined: July 20 04 From: sweet dimenno is in here Member No.: 3,283	QUOTE(dimenno @ Mar 24 2011, 08:46 PM) http://englishhistory.net/byron/poems/harold.html Entire text: http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/etext04/chpl10h.htm

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